⫣20⫦ Hidden in Your Eyes

Weeellll, and here, my beautiful people, you get the proper first sneak peak to JIKOOK.(SPOILER ALERT FOR HEAL ME!!)

Leeeets get it!

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The world is nothing but rhythm.

Real life seems as far from my reach as the sun or the moon as I dance and dance and dance.

I'm not thinking, just experiencing. Simply living in the moment. Here, there is no past, no future only the now.

My body is convulsing, turning, swaying and bending, everything controlled by the sound of the beat. I finally realize why these people seem to have no notion of private space. There is none. And I am no longer just myself. It feels more like 'us'- all those people I have never met, do not know their names, and yet we are one, connected by the music and what it does to our bodies. Connected by the energy pulsing through us.

Sweat drips from my forehead as I come face to face with Jin. His white shirt sticks to his body like a second skin and a wild smile plays on his lips. The flickering light makes his face sparkle like a rainbow and paired with the purple hair, gives him an almost other-worldly look. Too handsome to walk this earth.

In this state, there are no limits- nor rules. I feel reckless and without bounds to the outside world. There is just the here and now. My hands come up to his chest and it's like the touch suddenly connects us even more, swaying to the left and right in union, laughing together even as we can't hear the sound of it over the booming music.

But I can feel the vibration under my fingers, his chest hard and hot.

Jin twirls me once before pulling me close and I connect with his chest, finally close enough to hear the sound of his contagious laugh.Feel his heartbeat too, wild and frantic like the music and my own.

Then there is someone behind me, hands on my waist and moving my hips in circles. Then his hands slowly travel up. I throw my head back in ecstasy.

The music changes its beat and I turn, facing no other than J-Hope, who has zipped open his one piece down to his hips. I let my hands run down his defined abs and giggle furiously.

His body is a work of art. Defined lean muscles ending in a narrow waist.

Nothing but utter happiness shines out of his eyes- and perhaps a bit of mischief. All right, perhaps a lot of it. He grins at me and I let him guide my hips, my steps, while he moves with an ease that can only be achieved by year of practice.

His hair has fallen into his face in wet strands as he bites his lips with a dangerous gleam in his eyes before he shoves me back, sudden and unexpected.

I stumble two steps before strong arms come around my body, engulfing me in a back embrace. I have no chance but to follow the side to side swings of the man behind me. He is huge! Then I hear RM's chuckle because his head has buried itself in the place between my neck, close to my ear. It tickles and I let out another round of giggles. I can't seem to stop, and why the hell would I want to? I want this to be a dream I never have to wake up from.

"Having fun?" he screams into my ear and I respond with a loud and high-pitched "yes", hoping he can hear it.

He shakes with laughter, which I can feel more than hear.

For a few glorious songs, I simply enjoy being in his embrace. Even in the height of dancing and knowing who he truly is, I feel protected. Safe. Home.

I simply float on those feelings until something catches my attention.

Across from me I see another body dancing closely with a small, brunette girl, her hands travelling freely over his body, like mine had over Hoseoks. She is cute. Petite like me, her eyes holding an alluring glow and her brown hair has woven in peals, making her glitter like a little siren.

I focus back on the boy holding her close, allowing the girl to touch him all over.

The green washed out hair gives him away as Suga and I smile, overcome by one of those reckless, impulsive urges which seem to be led by no rational, sane thought, only pure instinct.

A wicked, perhaps a little vain instinct.

I wriggle myself out of RM's embrace who lets me go with a little push and I dance over to the entangled couple.

I'm not jealous exactly.But I do feel protective.And I just have the urge to mess with the girl a little. Whether that is right or wrong, I don't care.It just feels like I need to make sure she knows whose hands she has on.

I come up behind Suga and the girls eyes widen as her eyes lock on me. I shoot her a wicked smile over Suga's shoulders as I press my body against his back.

My hands come around him in a slow caress, revelling at the feeling of his strong shoulders and the wet shirt on his chest. Then I let them slip a bit further down his stomach.

He turns his head to the side and smile's as his eyes meet mine. Challenge shines out of them. And wild, uncontained mischief. 'Do your worst.' he seems to say, apparently not bothered in the slightest about my way of making an appearance.

The girl still only looks at me, her hands unsure at her sides, no longer swinging to the music. I almost pity her. I grin wider as I lower my head to Suga's shoulder and kiss him right where his shoulders meet his neck. It tastes salty and hot and I feel his body shake at the touch.

Feeling more than a little smug I finally detach myself from his back and give him a little shove in her direction.

Before I can see what she will do, I'm being turned around again and look up at a smiling Jungkook. I'm relieved to see him happy again- that twinkle back in his eyes.

"You are a very, very bad girl," he screams over the music, yet still manages to make it come out as a teasing purr and then pulls me close, a strong arm around my back. His shirt is unbuttoned and he undeniably owned the hottest body I have ever seen, including movies.

I bring my hand around his middle and interlock them on his back while swinging my hips against his. For a few moment the beat and his ridiculously good moves are all that I care about. JK is bloody born for this!

And with his height, the black hair and the dishevelled appearance, he reminds me of all the bad boys in those stories my mother likes to call trashy novels.

"Can I join?" Someone shouts from the back and both me and Jungkook turn to see Jimin stand there, his cheeks red from dancing and his hair bound up in a bun. Some of it is sticking out to the sides, giving him a little crazed look, but still devishly handsome.

In many ways, he is so completely the opposite of Jungkook in looks. Bright hair instead of dark, small and almost delicate compared to Jungkook's height. And while Jungkook looks a bit like a deer caught in headlights, Jimin's eyes are glowing with sinful confidence and shameful wickedness.

Before either of us can answer, he already dances over with the sexiest moves I have ever seen a man do and since I have turned to look at him, I am now perched with Jungkook behind me and Jimin directly in front.

With the naughtiest grin, Jimin grabs my shoulders and pushes me back until my backside is pressed against Jungkook and my front is covered with Jimin's. I gasp in surprise at his delicate but strong body against mine and the tall, muscular one at my back. I feel hot, both their bodies sending off heat in addition to my own ragged breathing and exhaustion, yet I don't want this feeling to ever stop.

I feel worshipped as our rhythm becomes one and our breaths mingle. I'm distantly aware that Jungkook's hand is wrapped around Jimin's waist on the other side, trapping me in their middle and clearly using some of his strength to push us closer together.

In response, Jimin reaches out, but not to me.

His elbows rest on my shoulders as his finger's trace over Jungkook's jawline, then down to his neck. I feel his body tense behind me and his eyes widen as he stares at Jimin over my shoulder.

I recognize that look as the same one I saw on Taehyung face, just before he kissed me earlier today. It's the look of someone who is about to loose all control.

And Jimin is looking back at him too, his eyes half closed as if this is a dream he never wants to wake up from.

For a moment I'm being pulled out of the trance of the music and realize what this is.

I am the excuse- the excuse for them to touch each other and later pretend they only did it because of me- to give me a good time.

It makes me angry, but not because I'm being used.

They have given me so much already: courage, freedom and more fun that I have experienced in my entire life.

They made me realize who I really am inside and accept it, so if there is anything they need from me, I will gladly give it.

Instead, I am angry at the fact that they clearly want each other and yet their dark past holds them back. It just isn't right. It feels like the people who did this to them, X-EXO, are wining- keeping them apart even if they are nothing more than a memory now.

It's time to give something back.

In a quick movement, I let myself drop to the floor and step out from beneath Jungkook's arm, swift like an eel. It's harder than I thought because of the tightness of our bodies, but I'm actually stronger than I look with all the training for the gymnastics team I had done over the years and it takes me only the split of a second.

I look up from my place on the floor in time to see the inevitable.

There is no time for them to realize what is happening as Jimin is being pulled forward by Jungkook, whose hand is still wrapped around the smaller boys waist. With my body suddenly gone, Jimin stumbles into the space where I used to be not a second ago, crashing into Jungkook's body, arms coming around the other boy's neck on instinct to avoiding falling.

Time seems to freeze as they stare in surprise, their bodies pressed together, Jungkook's hands around Jimin's small waist and their faces only millimeters apart.

Their height difference has Jimin looking up and Jungkook down, black hair falling into his face, dripping with sweat, both breathing heavily and I honestly doubt it's merely because of dancing.

I see it clearly- the moment where Jungkook could have pulled back and written this off as just another accident. But he doesn't.

He leans down, slowly and with wide eyes on Jimin as if he can't believe he is doing this and at the same time has no control to stop it.

The space between them shrinks, their eyes wholly on one another like they see nothing else anymore. Both their bodies tremble as their lips touch, even though it is only a gentle whisper of a kiss. Barely a touch.

The rawness of their emotions as they look into each other's eyes is almost too much, but my damn curiosity won't let me miss the view.

Jungkook just keeps staring at Jimin, even as the other boys hands unlock from behind his head and delicate, tiny hands explore downwards.

Since Jungkook's shirt is already half unbuttoned, there is nothing between them but skin. Jungkook's breathing turns even more frantic as Jimin's hands reaches his chest and begins drawing circles like it's his canvas and he the painter.

But the thing that really makes Jungkook loose all control is the slow lift of Jimin's lips, turning up into one of those sexy, smug smiles that lets everyone know: he's hot and he knows it!

That smile is gone in a second as Jungkook finally gives in to all that he wants, no more pretending, no more denying, and kisses Jimin hard and long, pulling him even closer.

It was maybe the hottest thing I've ever seen as they devour each other on the dance floor like they are the only ones that matter.

And for all the sexy, confident talk of the smaller, it is Jungkook who dominates that kiss. Jungkook who uses a hand around Jimin's waist to pull the boy tighter against him, nearly lifting the smaller one off his feet.

I finally decide to give them some privacy and stand. But not before mentally patting my own shoulder for my genius plan to have worked.

"Proud of yourself, aren't you?"

The female chuckle that follows makes me turn around and smile at Hwasa who eyes me with amused eyes and pursed lips. Proud isn't even the start. I feel like I just made the impossible happen.

She grins at me like she knows it and feels much the same.

"You really know how to play cupid," she purrs and twirls me a few times before taking my hand and dragging me after her through the crowed.

I yell at her to ask where we are headed, but either she doesn't hear me over the music or simply ignores it. I am pretty sure it is the latter.

We make it out of the mass of the crowed and the music becomes softer.

My ears feel numb at the sudden absence of the roaring beat and heat of the crowd. Hwasa doesn't turn around, even as I loudly ask again. She only leads me out into one of the long hallways and takes a few turns into other connecting halls like she walked them a thousand times. Another beat of music can be heard, getting louder, but not as deafening as in the warehouse and much slower. Trance music, I recall the name for it.

The room that opens up is darker- no blinking lights and raving crowds of people. It's dark, with only a few neon paints reflecting in the black-light. And then there is the floor, every inch covered in tapestries and cushions, ever single area draped in soft fabric to create what seems to be a massive living room.

Some people are standing, softly swinging to the music, their eyes closed and clearly on some kind of drug.

As so often, I hear my parents warning about such things, yet as I look at them, I don't really see what is so terrible about it. Their faces are serene and utterly at peace. Like nothing can bother them or hurt them in this little bubble. Others are seated, some together, some alone and seemingly asleep. There are the soft murmur of conversation and the music has just the right tune and volume to mix both into a soft, luring beat.

"This is the chill-out area." Hwasa announces and heads for a corner that no one occupies.

She finally turns to me and I have time to finally speak.

"Why are we here? Shouldn't we have told the others? What if they can't find us?"

She chuckles and angles her head to the side, her long her falling down to her hips.

"Well, Jimin and Jungkook certainly won't notice. And trust me... one of them definitely knows we are here. I bet he always knows where you are since the day he met you."

Before I can ask her about it or why her smile speaks of secrecy and amusement, she takes my hand and spins me once more.It has me landing, yet again, in a back embrace.

She settles into her favorite spot on my shoulder, the touch of her long hair on my arms and exposed stomach tickling.

"It's my turn to play now," she whispers in my ear and a second later I get her meaning, because a few meters away stand Taehyung, his face half hidden in the shadows of the room, and yet my breath catches at the mere sight of him.

No matter how much I enjoyed dancing and touching the others, it's nothing compared to what Taehyung's touch, his mere look, can do to my body. Affect it more consuming than any drug.

"He's been watching you all night, never leaving you out of his sight. I knew he would follow."

Hwasa's arms come around my stomach. The feeling of it mixes with the heat in Taehyung's eyes as he looks at me and takes a slow step towards us, making my skin tingle.

"Haven't your parent's ever taught you not to leave with strangers?" he says now, his voice strained, like he's trying to sound casual, but just can't manage.

I can't help the smile spreading on my face.

"They've also taught me never to go to parties like these. And drink alcohol, and smoke and certainly not stealing from a gas station. I bet this is the least of their worries."

He takes another step, his face coming into better view and I see the dark smile playing on his lips.

Then he shifts his attention to Hwasa, still holding me and his brows furrow.

"What is your plan here, Hwasa? Are you going to keep on holding her like that all evening?"

The jealousy in his voice is undeniable and it makes me snort against my better judgment.

"You've just watched me get pretty handsy with the boys and you're jealous about Hwasa hugging me?"

Taehyung opens his mouth to say something but Hwasa is faster. She lets out a sniggering laugh.

"That's different, Lian. They are family. None of the others would even consider trying to take you, not when Taehyung has made it pretty obvious who you belong to. And it was dancing: when you dance, there is no rule about touching as long as you are led by the music and not by want. And if BTS stands for one thing, it's having fun. But my sweet Lian, " she says in a smoky, seductive tone, starting to leisurely draw large circles on my stomach.

"You haven't seen him jealous yet."

And with that she lowers her head and places a long, hot kiss on my neck.

I'm too surprised at the sudden sensation to do anything but experience it.

"Stop it, Hwasa." Taehyung warns with a snarl and I see he has come even closer. He looked downright murderous with the half-lit lightning and dark, burning eyes. His hands, though he tries to appear calm and collected, are shaking ever so slightly, as if he's locked in an inner battle with himself. The sight hits something low in my stomach.

"Oh my, you really don't like me doing this, do you Tae?" she teases him and I watch Taehyung's expression darken even more. Does Hwasa have death wish?

"You're walking a fine line, Hwasa, and I think you know it."

"That's bold coming from the guy who constantly walks with one step off the railing."

Her body has strained and her voice changed- like switching the TV channel.She sounds dead serious all of a sudden and downright frightening.

"I know what I'm doing," Taehyung grinds out and I'm beginning to understand that this is more than just teasing. This is very much real, and not a game at all.

"You might think that, but do you really? I usually keep myself out of your businesses, but I know you and the guys are always planning something. I just want to make sure she doesn't get hurt in the process."

Taehyung takes a step back, like her words physically slapped him, and his mouth falls open with a sharp intake of breath. It makes him look younger and for the first time I see something like uncertainty in his eyes.

"I wouldn't hurt her, Hwasa. And the other's wont either." He gives her a stare that tells me he is conveying even more to her, like he's adding something only meant for her, yet I cannot say what it might be.

"You better not," she hisses and I suddenly understand what Hwasa is doing: she's giving Taehyung a warning!

She's protecting me- from them? It comes as such an unexpected turn of events, I can do little more than stand there and gape.

But whatever she sees in Taehyung's answering gaze makes her body loose some of that tension again and she exhaled deeply- and sadly.

"I just want to make sure she is the one to catch you, Tae.And that you won't be the one taking her down with you instead."

At that, Taehyung looks down, his features hidden by his hair and the poor light, but I see those hands balled into fists at his sides, the veins on his arm popping out. He stands so entirely still, but his chest heaves like he just ran a marathon.

But before I can try and get a closer look at his expression, Hwasa turns me, with gentle hands this time, and the smile she shoots me reminds me of my mother- the one she has only shown me very few times in my life. I've never understood what that look was, until now.

It's a mother's love.

She pulls me in a warm, tender embrace that is nothing like the possessive, seductive touches she has given me up until now."You are so precious, Lian" I hear her whisper in my ear.

"And stronger than you think. Hold on to him as long as you can, but if you can't, let go."

She pulls away and I see the worry in her eyes while her words leave me with a bitter feeling. She untangles her arms from around me and turns away, leaving me in the dark corner, Taehyung next to me. He is still looking to the ground, unmoving.I take a deep breath. And then another, trying to sort my thoughts.

First Momo, then RM and now Hwasa. In some way or another, they are all warning me about the boy next to me. I turn my body to his and take a slow step towards him.

I know he is aware of it, but he doesn't look up, not even as I come to a stop right in front of him. I don't say anything. I don't know what.

"I should take you home, Lian. It's late." he finally croaks out, still not looking up. His voice is like gravel over stone, making me shiver, but not the one he usually brings out in me.

I do it because I have no choice. I need to see his eyes, so I lift my hand under his chin and make him look at me.

And as my eyes meet his, I finally know what they all meant.

It's not that he is dangerous or malicious, or that he is going to hurt me- no it's worse.It's despair. Utter, heart wrenching pain that shines out of his eyes like he is so lost in it that no light can shine through.

I have seen it so often these days, like a flicker of a shadow over his eyes that I never paid too much attention to- always gone too fast for me to decipher bevor he was the young, reckless and slightly dangerous bad boy once more. Like it has never been there.

But now I know. I understand.

The reason for his recklessness and his need for danger and the kick it gives him...a distraction from all that pain inside him.

And then I stumble back, like something has knocked me over.

Because I realize something else at that moment, the truth hitting me in the face, hard and sudden and irrevocable.

That it's already too late for me.

I can never let go.

Not of him.

Never.

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I'm not the best artist, but I do like to play around a little.Let me know if you recognize the Thai BL I used as base pictures... haha(Tipp: some of the best)