In Pursuit

If you'd told me before I met Daryl Dixon, that one day I'd find myself running through walker-filled woods, chasing a man that had chosen to leave me - after ignoring me for days - I'd have laughed in your face.

Yet, here I was, dipping under branches and trying desperately to follow his tracks. My revelation in the car had filled me with hope - a new found confidence that what the gorgeous redneck and I had was real, and that it was his own inner-turmoil refusing to let him give in to his feelings for me. I felt it in every touch we'd ever shared, that kiss.

I had to find him.

I moved alone through the woods for what felt like forever before I started to lose hope of catching up to the Dixon brothers. I could track okay enough, but I was no expert, and it was very possible I wasn't even heading in the same direction as them anymore. I had no idea where they were heading.

Eventually, I dropped to the floor of the never-ending woodland, exhausted. My head still pounded from Merle going Robocop on me, and I felt faint from not eating. I cursed myself for not checking the car for supplies before I left, the surge of adrenaline that appeared once I'd resolved to follow Daryl carrying me quickly into the woods in pursuit.

One silver lining of the expedition was that I'd barely encountered any walkers, only having to take down four in the whole time I'd been out here. I knew Daryl was more than capable of dealing with the biting rotbags, but I still found comfort in knowing that the pair likely wouldn't be attacked by a whole gang of them.

My eyes felt as heavy as sandbags, and the sky was starting to get dark. I considered giving up. I didn't want to, but if I hadn't found him by now, what would the chances be that I ever would?

I pulled myself up into a reasonably comfortable-looking tree, something I did a lot when I was alone before joining the group. I'daccepted that I needed rest before I could continue.

Tears of exhaustion, frustration, and loss fell from my eyes without warning as I settled myself on a mossy branch.

What if i didn't find him? I'd probably never see him ever again...

I propped my back up against the tree's giant trunk and tried my best to relax my body - succumbing to sleep quickly - pure fatigue taking over me, plus what was probably still a little bit of concussion - thanks, Merle.

I woke to daylight ebbing into the sky and got back on track straight away. I couldn't help but hope that, by some miracle, I'd still find Daryl. It seemed absurd to consider, but something in my gut told me that this wasn't over. I hoped that by setting off as the day first entered, I'd catch them up - if I was still following the right trail...

I moved fast, not allowing myself to think about my still sore head wound or how hungry I was. I walked for an eternity before something stopped me in my tracks.

One of Daryl's bolts protruding from a walker's skull.

I knew it belonged to the redneck, I'd recognise them anywhere. He spent so much time fiddling with them, their appearance had been burned into my brain. I bent down and pulled the bolt out of its gory home, wiping it clean on the leaves of the closest tree.

The walker looked like it had been slain very recently, no flies or maggots visible anywhere on its body.

This was a sign, reassurance that I was gaining on them.

I took off with a run now, still clutching the bolt in my hand. I managed maybe thirty minutes before I had to stop and walk again, but hopefully, my effort had reduced the distance between the Dixons and I even further.

~

Another couple of hours of working my way through thick brush, and I was exhausted. I was losing the light, and my whole body burned. I pulled out a bottle from my pack, guzzling the last tiny bit of water I had with me, when I heard southern accents.

I recognised Daryl's smooth rasp instantly.

Tears pricked my eyes with relief at the realisation I'd found him. Though I'd failed to let myself consider - until now - how he was going to respond to me following him, the thought process too dangerous to my resolve. Now, I had to think about his reaction, and I was nervous.

He'd left me behind, but I knew he didn't want to. I understood the redneck so much more now. All of his actions made sense. I was ready to go all in and show him just how much he meant to me, to everyone. If he was angry at me for following him, so be it.

I could tell that the pair were fighting. I couldn't make out their words, but I could tell Daryl was pissed. I paused when I heard the arguing stop, the faint rustling of trees being pushed past replacing the Dixon back-and-forth. Without warning, he emerged from the foliage in front of me, muttering under his breath.

I saw him before he saw me, and my stomach started doing its best impression of a washing machine - spinning around dizzyingly. It only took a second for Daryl to look up, his body startling and his eyes wide with disbelief.

"Athena?" He blurted out, unsure of himself, clearly unable to believe what he was seeing.

"Hey." I replied as nonchalantly as I could, like I hadn't just spent two days trekking the woods searching for him, "I thought you might need this." I continued, holding up the bolt I'd found.

"W-, uh, what..?" was all he could stutter out, blinking his eyes as though to check he wasn't imagining me.

He moved toward me slowly until he was a few feet away, then stopped, still staring at me in disbelief.

"So I decided you weren't allowed to leave." I told him, feigning confidence, not letting on that my heart was pounding in my chest.

"I din't think I'd see ya again." He spoke softly, inching nearer again.

The look in his eyes told me I didn't need to worry about him being angered by my arrival. His expression was soft, affectionate. He moved closer still, so he was almost within touching distance. The bolt slipped out of my hand in anticipation, landing on the floor by our feet.

The air between us suddenly felt alive, crackling with a tension that had been building for what felt like forever. Neither of us spoke now, the silence carrying all the weight of everything we hadn't dared to say.

He was close enough that I could feel the heat radiating off him, see the way his chest rose, and fell as if he was trying to steady himself. His eyes flitted over my face - my lips, my eyes, then back again. His fingers twitched at his side like he wanted to reach out but wasn't sure if he should.

Then, almost imperceptibly, he moved. His hand came up, rough and calloused, brushing against my jaw with a tenderness that caught me off guard. His thumb traced the line of my cheek, hesitant, like he was testing the waters. My breath hitched, and I saw it - just a flicker - in his expression: that fear he always carried, like he wasn't sure if he was allowed to want this. To want me.

I came here to show him that he was more than enough for me, that he didn't need to be afraid of his feelings because I reciprocated them wholeheartedly. I wanted him, I needed him, and God damnit was I going to have him.

I couldn't find the right words, something not helped by the fact he stood mere inches away, his hand still resting on my face.

I was going to have to show him.

I took a deep breath, fighting my nerves, then leaned in and pressed my lips gently to his, my hands landing on each side of his face. His breath stalled now, his body tensing as he let his hands rest loosely on my waist.

I pulled back.

The peck was an invitation, a message that he hadn't lost me, I was here for him. All he had to do was take me.

And he did.

He looked deep into my eyes before closing the gap between us, his mouth landing on mine and kissing me slowly, deeply. This wasn't frantic and messy like last time. This was soft, meaningful, incredible. I kissed him back instantly, my hands tangling in his hair as we took our time getting to know each other in a new way. The previous kiss was passionate and frenzied, but this was measured and delicate - meant to convey a promise to each other to keep each other safe.

I could feel his body shaking beneath my fingers, but he didn't stop - didn't shut down. He fought it, held me there, and poured himself into me like nothing else in the world mattered. He kissed me until we absolutely had to break apart for oxygen.

He rested his forehead against mine, his eyes closed, breathing heavily like the gesture had exhausted him completely. I raised a hand and stroked the side of his face gently, my other hand resting at the back of his head while his arms stayed locked around my waist.

"Daryl." I told him, "Everything you said back at the road was bullshit, inside of your own head. You're more than enough. You're incredible. The way you make me feel... I've never met anyone like you. I'm not letting you go. I won't."

He opened his eyes now and leaned back slightly so we were staring straight at each other. I could tell he kept attempting to say something in response to my declaration, but he hesitated each time - either lost for words or he just couldn't bring himself to say them. Instead, he leaned back in and kissed me all over again, harder this time. He squeezed my body flush against him, like an unspoken message that he had me, he wasn't letting go.

"Hey!" Merle's voice sounded in the near distance, "Ya' finished sulkin' ya pus-"

The elder redneck stopped as he broke through the trees, spotting Daryl and I, who'd been rudely broken apart by his impending arrival. His eyes were wide with surprise as he took me in.

"Sugartits! I missed ya'" he exclaimed, smiling at me sarcastically.

"Shut up, Merle!" Daryl hissed at him.

"I saw that emotional display of yur's when Daryl here left. You guys bumpin' uglies?"

"I oughta bump the ugly outta you, Robocop!" I shot back at him.

"Ooooh, she's feisty. Kinda turns me on, baby. I won't lie." He moved closer to me, licking his lips.

"Back off, asshole." Daryl snarled at him, stepping forward.

"Now what? We got ourselves a little threesome? Ya finally gon' show little boy here what it's like to be a real man?"

Before I knew it, the brothers were eye-to-eye, readying to throw punches.

I jumped in between them, not even thinking about what I was doing. I faced Merle and stared him down, he pushed his chest out, trying to intimidate me. It wasn't going to work.

"Gonna hit me again, Merle? Gonna knock me out and leave me for walkers? " I asked him in my sassiest tone, "No, you're not, because I'm the only person except Daryl willing to be around your sorry ass. I'd rather be as far away from you as humanly possible, but your brother is standing by you... still, so here I am, and you might wanna start showing him some respect."

Merle eyed me, trying to work me out. His gaze flicked between Daryl and I.

"It's like God damn Romeo and Juliet." He offered sarcastically, stepping back, showing retreat. He turned in the direction he'd come from, leaving Daryl and I alone again.

I turned to him, rolling my eyes as a laugh escaped me, I had Merle's number. He wasn't as tough as he tried to make out. To my surprise, the younger redneck chuckled too, for the first time since I'd known him. It made his eyes light up, and he looked utterly beautiful.

"Are ya' really stayin'?" he asked me, his expression hopeful but tinged with disbelief.

"Yup!" I replied, "You're fully stuck with me, Daryl Dixon. I'm not going anywhere. It's just a shame that makes me stuck with Robocop as well."

He kissed me again, just briefly, his tongue dipping into my mouth as a quick show of his gratitude.

"C'mon." He told me, "We need ta keep movin'."

~

It was dark by the time the three of us found a place suitably walker free to hunker down for the night. We'd run into swathes of the stinky cannibals in the last few hours, working together to take them down. Wherever we'd made it to now was much more densely populated that the earlier stretch.

Daryl and I hadn't had another moment to steal away, and I knew he'd feel uncomfortable with any sort of PDA in front of Merle. I was longing to touch him again, but I refrained, thinking instead about how it had felt when he kissed me to satisfy my urges.

The redneck hadn't let me out of sight, not wanting to leave me alone with his big brother for a second, but I wasn't afraid of Merle. He was a pussycat masquerading as a lion. Sure, he was tough, just like his brother, but his bravado felt forced, like he too was trying to cover up a pain inside of him.

"So..." he questioned when Daryl had finally left us alone to try to find something to eat, me staying behind at my own request. "Baby brother knows you can handle old Merle on your own huh?'

"I can more than handle you." I told him. "You got the jump on me with your titanium shit before, but you won't again."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." I taunted him. "I could kick your ass from here to Alabama if I wanted to."

"I did say ya' were feisty, Sugartits." He laughed.

"Ain't no sugar in this rack for you, Merle. Come up with a new nickname."

He looked deep in thought, scrambling to find a new insult, but I interrupted his pointless quest.

"I know you love your brother." I told him.

He focused his eyes on my intently.

"He's all I got." He replied, more gently than I'd expected. "Do you?"

"What?"

"Are ya' head over heels for never-been-kissed out there?"

I didn't answer. I felt like I knew the answer. I'd loved Daryl as a friend for a long time, and I probably was in love with him, but I wasn't ready to admit it - not to myself - and especially not to Merle.

Bushes beside us rustled in warning as my preferred Dixon brother emerged, holding a dead possum in his hand. He looked flustered, like the hunt had been rushed, him not wanting to leave Merle and I alone for longer than he absolutely had to.

He cooked the marsupial. It tasted terrible, but it was food. We threw together a perimeter using trash we'd collected from the woods and set it up as a makeshift walker alert system. Merle laid himself down on one side of the waning fire, Daryl and I on the other, not too close - I knew he was insecure about Merle watching, but he kept himself within close proximity.

When we finally heard Merle's snores, I tentatively reached over to him and took his hand, placing it to my lips for a few seconds. When he didn't protest, I shuffled closer and repeated the gesture on his mouth, his body heat and woody scent making me feel tingly.

"I'm glad yur here." He whispered, lifting his hand and stroking my hair loosely.

"Me too." I told him, placing another gentle kiss to his lips, then rolling over and taking his arm with me to wrap around my waist. He didn't hesitate to tighten his grip, pulling me even closer into his chest and placing his own soft kiss to the back of my head.

We may have been sleeping on the dirt in the middle of walker-ready woods, but the security I felt lying enveloped by him was incredible. I felt like nothing in the world could hurt us, as long as we never let each other go.

~

The brothers were already awake and packing up when I woke, Daryl wrapping our makeshift alert system around his bag so we could take it with us.

"Mornin' sleepin' ugly." Merle hollered when he saw me rouse, but there was no real bite to it. It almost felt affectionate in a strange way.

"We moving?" I asked Daryl, who replied with a nod, his eyes lingering on me and the corners of his mouth threatening a smile.

I felt heavy guilt this morning for abandoning our family in search of the man who set my heart on fire. I didn't regret going after Daryl, but it weighed on me that I'd left the others to fend for themselves if Bandage Bastard came knocking. I wondered if I could convince Daryl to go back... He wouldn't leave Merle, and nobody would be happy to see the less likeable redneck, but could there be a way to make it work?

The morning sun bore down on us as we moved along a weathered stretch of bridge. The asphalt was cracked and pitted, lined with the kind of rusted-out cars that always screamed bad news. My boots crunched against the gravel as I kept my eyes sharp, the feeling that we weren't alone growing in my gut. Daryl was up ahead, his crossbow slung over his shoulder, moving with that quiet intensity that made him seem more predator than man. Merle, on the other hand, was running his mouth like usual, spitting out crude remarks that made me clench my jaw.

Then we saw them. A man, a woman, a young boy, and a baby. They were huddled beside an old pickup truck - being advanced on by walkers. The man was holding a crowbar, his knuckles white. He had that look I recognized too well: a mix of desperation and determination.

"Oh God!" tumbled out of my mouth as Daryl and I moved toward them in unison. Merle didn't follow.

"Hey, man, I ain't wastin' my bullets on a couple strangers that ain't never cooked me a meal or... or fellaciated my piece!" He called after us. "That's my policy. You'd be wise to adopt it, brother!"

I willed him to shut the fuck up in my head.

Daryl stiffened as he moved, his shoulders tensing like a bowstring pulled too tight. He didn't look at me, but I knew what that meant - he was biting his tongue, trying to ignore he asshole brother.

We worked together to take down the threat, him with his crossbow, me with my gun. When we were done, the man spoke in Spanish. I'd learned a little at school, but not enough to know what he was saying. Daryl nodded at him, and the family began edging back toward their car.

"Slow down there José." Merle warned, appearing beside us and pointing his gun at the man we'd just saved. "That ain't no way to say thank you."

"Let 'em go." Daryl muttered.

"Nah. The least they can do is give us an enchilada or somethin', huh?" Merle argued, moving toward the vehicle.

The air around us grew heavier, like a storm about to break. I felt my heartbeat quicken as the woman pulled the boy closer, shielding him with her body. The kid's wide, frightened eyes cut through me like a blade.

"Back up, Merle!" I demanded sharply.

"I know you're not talkin' to me, sweetcheeks." He spat back.

"Get in ya' car and get the hell outta here!" Daryl encouraged as he stepped between Merle and the family, his crossbow raised.

"The shit ya' doin', pointin' that thing at me?" Merle scoffed, shaking his head.

Daryl didn't respond, but I caught the faintest twitch in his jaw. As the family disappeared down the road, he turned to me, eyes meeting mine for the briefest moment. In them, I saw the conflict he carried - his loyalty to his brother warring with the man he was trying to be.

"Let's keep movin'." he said gruffly, breaking the silence.

I nodded, falling into step beside him. Merle kept muttering something under his breath, but I wasn't listening anymore. My focus was on Daryl, on the weight he carried and the way he never let it break him. It was moments like this that reminded me why I wanted to be by his side. Because underneath all the grit and the anger, Daryl Dixon had a heart big enough to hold onto what was left of our humanity. Even if he couldn't see it for himself.

Yayyy she found him ❤️

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