No Escaping the Past

The fight broke out before I even realized it was coming, though I should have seen it in the way Daryl and Merle moved after we left the bridge.

The tension between them hung heavy, a storm waiting to explode. Merle, as usual, was running his mouth, laughing to himself like he'd just pulled off some grand joke that only he found funny. Daryl, quiet and coiled, had that look in his eyes - the one that told me he was a second away from snapping.

"That was real sweet, little brother." Merle flung, his tone mocking. "Steppin' in for them wetbacks like some kinda damn hero. Ya' gonna go back and hold their hands too? Sing 'em a lullaby?"

"Shut your mouth, Merle." Daryl growled, not bothering to look back at him. His voice was low, dangerous, like a warning growl from an animal.

"Oh, come on." Merle pressed, his grin widening. "Don't tell me yur goin' soft. All this time out here, I thought ya' had a pair."

Daryl spun around so fast it made me jump. His crossbow was slung over his back now, his hands free and ready. He stepped right up to Merle, their faces inches apart.

"You don't know when to quit, do you?" Daryl hissed.

Merle didn't back down, of course. He never did. Instead, he smirked, leaning in closer like he was daring Daryl to make a move. "What's the matter, baby brother? Ya' mad 'cause I told the truth? Or is it 'cause ya' know I'm right? World's gone to hell, and yur still out here playin' the good guy."

That was it. Daryl swung first. His fist collided with Merle's jaw so hard it echoed across the empty stretch of road. Merle stumbled but recovered quickly, spitting blood onto the ground before charging at Daryl like a bull.

Watching them fight was like seeing a tornado tear through everything in its path. Daryl was smaller but faster, ducking under Merle's wild punches and landing solid hits to his ribs. His face was red, streaked with dirt and sweat, but his eyes burned with something darker.

"Ya' don't get to talk to me like that," Daryl snapped, his voice raw. "Not after everything I've done for ya'."

Merle laughed, a cruel, bitter sound. "Everything ya'v done for me? That's rich. Ya' think yur the big man now? Ya' ain't nothin' without me. Ya' never were."

Daryl swung again, but Merle caught his wrist this time, twisting it hard enough to make him wince. "Go on," Merle snarled, his grin gone now. "Show me what yur made of, little brother. Prove me wrong."

I couldn't stand it anymore. "Enough!" I yelled, stepping closer. "What the hell is wrong with you two? You're supposed to be brothers, not enemies!"

They both froze, breathing hard, their fists still raised. For a second, it was like they forgot I was even there, like their world was so wrapped up in each other that nothing else mattered.

Daryl was the first to step back, jerking his arm free from Merle's grip. He wiped the blood from his split lip with the back of his hand, his chest rising and falling as he tried to calm down.

Merle smirked, but there was no humor in it now. "See? Ya' ain't got it in ya'. Yur weak. Always have been."

Daryl didn't respond. He just turned and walked past me, his boots crunching against the gravel as he moved away from Merle - and from me.

I stood there, my chest tightening, unsure whether to follow him or let him have his space. Merle watched him go too, shaking his head like he was disappointed. Then he looked at me, his eyes cold and mean.

"Good luck with that one." he said before turning and heading the other way.

I waited until Merle was out of sight before I followed Daryl. He'd stopped a little ways down the road, leaning against a tree with his head bowed. I could tell he was trying to pull himself together, but the tension in his shoulders told me he wasn't there yet.

"Daryl," I said softly, stepping up beside him.

He didn't look at me, but he didn't move away either. "He don't know when to shut up." he muttered.

"No, he doesn't," I agreed.

For a long moment, we stood there in silence. I didn't know what to say to make it better, and I wasn't sure Daryl would want me to try. So instead, I just stayed with him, close enough to let him know he wasn't alone.

~

The fire Daryl was cooking on crackled in the cool afternoon air, its sound bouncing off the trees around us. It almost felt like one of those rare moments of rest where you could just sit and feel human again. But with Merle Dixon around, peace always seemed a fragile thing.

I despised the way he treat Daryl. It made my blood boil, witnessing the cruel way he spoke to him and how it could make the tough, brave redneck shrink into himself like a child. I didn’t understand how a sibling could be so cruel, and it was taking everything in me not to kick the shit out of him – the only thing stopping me being that I knew Daryl wouldn’t want me to.

I’d been watching the brothers from where I sat, my back against the trunk of a tree. Daryl was hunched forward, elbows on his knees now, sharpening one of his arrows with that focused intensity he always had when he was trying to drown out the world. His brother loomed over him, seemingly intent of continuing their fight from earlier.

“Ya’ think yur too good for me now, huh? “Merle taunted. “Got ya’self a little group, some new friends, maybe even someone who’ll finally show you what that bulge in ya’ pants is for?” His eyes flicked toward me with a smirk, and my stomach twisted.

“Man, I went back for ya’, she came too!” he hissed at his brother, rising to his feet. “Ya’ weren’t there!”

Daryl had looked broken when we found Merle’s hand on that roof back in Atlanta. He’d have stayed and looked for his brother even alone if I hadn’t volunteered to help. Why couldn’t Merle see how much he loved him?

“Ya’ know what’s funny to me? Hmm? You and Sheriff Rick are like this now, right?” Merle questioned, crossing his fingers. “Hmm. I bet you a penny ‘n a fiddle of gold that you never told him that we were plannin’ on robbin’ that camp blind.”

Daryl glanced over at me involuntarily, checking to see if I’d heard. I had, but I didn’t care. I jumped to my feet, I was sick of Merle’s crap.

I also wanted to show Daryl I still had his back regardless, just like did for me.

I’d reached them, ready to knock Robocop into next week, when Daryl stepped in front of me, stopping me and keeping me out of harm’s way at the same time.

“It didn’t happen.” he protested defensively.

“Yeah!” Merle agreed snidely. “It  didn’t. ‘Cause I wasn’t there to help ya’.”

“What, like when we were kids, huh?” Daryl spat angrily. “Who left who then?”

Merle reared back slightly. Daryl’s demons were making more sense to me the more time I spent with the two brothers.

“Yur a simpleminded piece of shit!” He continued.

“Yeah? You don’t know!” Merle roared, grabbing Daryl by the shirt as he turned to walk away. He yanked hard, and the shirt tore open, exposing Daryl’s back.

What the fuck?

I couldn't believe my eyes. Scars covered him – deep, jagged lines crisscrossing his back and shoulders. I felt myself welling up automatically.

Who’d done this to him?

They told a story Daryl had buried deep, one that not even Merle was aware of - judging by his shocked expression. Daryl shoved him away, his face a mask of fury, but it was too late. He knew we’d seen them.

My heart clenched in my chest as he scrambled to cover his back with his bag. The expression on his face broke my heart all over again – shame – although completely unwarranted.

He had nothing to be ashamed of when it came to me, but he looked ready to bolt, to disappear into the shadows and never come back. He wouldn’t look at me, even though I stood frozen just feet away.

Having seen his scars laid bare, the full weight of what he must have endured hit me like a blow. Somebody had hurt him, bad.

“I, I didn’t know he was-” Merle stuttered, looking genuinely shocked.

“Yeah, he did.” Daryl muttered quietly, “He did the same to you. That’s why ya’ left first.”

“I had to, man, I woulda killed ‘im otherwise.”

A tear fell without my permission.

Were they talking about their father?

“Get outta my face,” Daryl growled, his voice thick with something I couldn’t quite place. Surprisingly, Merle took heed, skulking off into the trees. Big bad Merle actually looked like he was about to cry.

Daryl stayed planted to the spot, his chest rising and falling with heavy breaths. I wiped my tear away and stepped forward slowly.

“Daryl,” I said softly, my voice barely above a whisper.

He flinched but didn’t move away as I reached out, gently touching his arm. His skin was warm under my fingers, tense and trembling.

“Don’t.” he said, his voice raw and broken. “Just… don’t.”

But I didn’t let go.

His jaw clenched, and for a moment, I thought he might push me away. But then his shoulders sagged, and the fight seemed to drain out of him.

“Ain’t nobody’s business.” he sighed.

“I know.” I said softly, stepping closer, my hand still resting lightly on his arm.

He looked at me then, finally, his blue eyes full of vulnerability. I’d never seen him like this, and I couldn’t stand it. I felt a surge of anger so vengeful it made my hands shake. I wanted to find the person who’d done this to him and make them pay for every mark they’d left on Daryl’s body and soul.

I reached for his hand, and he didn’t resist, so I moved closer and delicately kissed his forehead, showing him that nothing had changed. I didn’t see him any differently. I knew that was what he was expecting to happen, and it simply wasn’t true.

If anything, it made me want to protect him even more fiercely. I pressed my lips softly to his now, a silent reminder that I was here and wasn’t going anywhere.

Merle re-emerged, quiet for once in his life, Daryl refusing to look at him.

“C’mon” he instructed, grabbing my hand and pulling me along with him.

“Hey! Where ya’ goin’?” Merle hollered.

“Back where we belong.” Daryl told him, and my heart leapt.”

We were going home.

“I can’t go with ya’.”

Daryl spun back to face him, not loosening his grip on me.

“You know, we may be the ones walkin’ away,” he told his brother. “But yur the one that’s leavin’. Again!"

I glared angrily at Merle as we continued moving further, our fingers still tightly intertwined.

~

The scene that met us as we approached the prison was pure chaos. A lorry had torn down the fence, and the yard was swimming with walkers. I felt like I couldn’t breathe as the realisation dawned on me that the whole group could be dead. I’d abandoned them. We both had.

I saw Daryl raise his crossbow and release a bolt into a walker that was about to bite none other than Rick Grimes. I couldn’t help but smile when I saw him. He was alive. I just prayed everyone else was, too.

Daryl, Rick, and I joined forces to annihilate the rest of the walkers surrounding us, helped by Merle, who’d followed Daryl and I the whole way back.

Getting in the way of the make out sessions I’d been planning.

“What happened!?” I questioned Rick as we made it back to the main prison building after running at full speed through the army of walkers that had now claimed the yard.

“The Governor happened.” He replied.

Bandage Bastard.

I could tell he was pissed at us for leaving, I couldn’t blame him. Surprisingly, though, he didn’t bother arguing about Merle’s presence much. I think he was simply too exhausted to try.

“He can stay separate for now.” Daryl offered.

The older Dixon objected, obviously, but a sharp glare from Daryl made him pipe down. Seeing his brother’s scars had clearly done a number on Merle. I doubted quiet Robocop would last long, though.

Maggie and Carol leapt to their feet when I entered the cellblock and enveloped me in a hug. To my surprise, everyone actually looked happy to see me return. It didn’t ease my guilt at leaving, but it was a huge relief that they didn't seem to be holding it against me.

“Daryl? Carol asked hopefully.

“He’s here.” I smiled at her and she looked like she might cry with joy. “He’s just taking care of... something.”

I opted not to ruin our happy reunion with the news that the man who’d taken and tortured Maggie and Glenn was sitting just a cellblock over. I’d leave that one for Daryl.

"You found him then." Maggie spoke into my ear, as very cheeky grin on her face.

"Mmm-hmm." I smiled back.

“Axel’s dead.” Beth informed, appearing beside us. “And Thomas – the creepy prisoner – he was hiding in the tunnels, he’d let those walkers in before. Oh, and some new people came. Michonne is staying as well, I think.”

That was a lot of information to take in after such a long day.

Also, who the hell was Michonne?

“Well...” I replied, “Fill me in tomorrow, I desperately need an appointment with some hot water.”

I thought about Axel as I made my way to the showers, stopping briefly by the perch on route to grab a towel, clean clothes, a hairbrush and a toothbrush. The man was irritating as hell, but I liked him, and I felt a pang of sadness that he was gone. I didn’t give much mind to the apparent new arrivals, I didn’t have the energy. I could find out more tomorrow.

The shower was heavenly. I felt like a new woman when I emerged. I threw on some baggy pants and a t-shirt before tackling my matted hair. I couldn’t help but put extra effort into making it less fucked up tonight, it would be mine and Daryl’s first night in the perch together in a while and I didn’t know what to expect.

Usually if I were sharing a bedroom with a man I fancied this much - I'd be confident that I'd be getting some, but Daryl didn't work like that. Honestly, I think he was still trying to get used to me kissing him, but I didn't care. Just lying beside him would be enough.

I passed the redneck on the way to our quarters. Merle had clearly been successfully detained.

Wait, was he holding a towel?

“Wow. Do my eyes deceive me?” I teased. “Daryl Dixon going to use the showers? Must have someone to impress.” I winked at him.

He didn’t bite, but I saw his ears blush as he smirked playfully at me and continued without a word.

On arriving at the perch, I threw my filthy clothes into a heap in the corner and collapsed onto my mattress, reaching over and pulling Daryl’s flush beside it. I was going to be snuggling with the big, tough redneck whether he liked it or not.

As I lay there, I thought about the whirlwind of events of the last few days...

I’d been knocked out cold by Merle’s robot hand, left for dead, rescued by Daryl – only to then run back off into the thick of things at Woodbury – said goodbye to the man I was obsessed with, then changed my mind and spent two days following him through the woods, had the most beautiful and meaningful kiss of my life, saved a Mexican family and...

I shuddered when I remembered the image of Daryl’s scars, trying to put the memory out of my head for now.

...It had been a wild few days – no wonder I was exhausted.

As I got comfortable, I thought about the way Daryl had kissed me when we reunited and how he’d held me during the night. I couldn’t wait to feel his arms wrapped around me again. I didn’t know how this was going to go between us now, but I felt confident that it was in the direction I wanted it to. I’d laid myself bare to him and left no room for him to question how much I wanted him, and I knew now that he wanted me, too. But I was also aware of how insecure he seemed about touching me, and I respected that he could be uneasy about the others being aware of the change in our dynamic. I didn’t care, though – he’d be here soon as I couldn’t wait for him to hold me against his chiselled body.

I stirred sometime later to feel a warm body edging onto the mattress next to me.

“Hey.” I mumbled sleepily. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

“S’fine.” He whispered back, throwing a blanket over me. “Sleep.”

Even in the dim light of the perch, I could see how ruggedly handsome he looked. His hair was wet from the shower and I could see his skin clearly now it was free from grime.

Fuck me, he was breathtaking.

He seemed nervous about lying down, like he was invading my space despite me being the one who’d rearranged our mattresses.

“Changed your mind about me?” I taunted him.

“Nah.” He breathed, finally settling down beside me but taking care not to touch.

This simply wouldn’t do.

“What? You don’t wanna be the big spoon? You can be the little spoon if you like...”

His eyebrow raised - he clearly had no idea what I was talking about.

“Come here!” I demanded, not able to wait a moment longer to feel him. He obliged, scooting next to me as I once again grabbed his arm and wrapped it around my waist from behind. He held me tight, nuzzling his face into my neck slightly as he planted a soft kiss nervously to it.

“Night Ath.” He breathed.

“Goodnight Daryl.” I responded, yawning, as I lifted his hand and pressed my lips to it, then replaced it on my waist. I fell into slumber almost instantly.

It was the best night’s sleep I’d had in my entire life.

Finally, things are heading in the right direction for our pair.

Thanks so much for the votes and comments! ❤️