10: It's All Good Then

Jeongyeon

1 month ago (Before Paris)

When making a diagnosis as a doctor, I make sure to tell all of my patients everything honestly. It was easy for me since most of my patients are strangers to me. Telling them that they are dying, that they have a terminal disease or their life is in danger, it was easy for me.

But now, I felt every sympathy and fear as I told my besfriend that she have a cancer. Hearing her say that she puts all of her trust and hope in me, makes me nervous and scared of what outcome it may give.

I can't get out of my head the sad smile that Chaeyoung gave me before walking out of my office. I wonder how Mina will react if Chaeyoung tells her everything about it.

I was full with thoughts of Chaeyoung when two knocks were heard at my condo's door, I find it strange because I wasn't expecting anyone. I walked closer to the door and opened it, surprised to see an unexpected guess right in front of me.

"Nayeon? What are you doing here?" I asked her but she didn't answer so I just told her to come in. She just came inside and I followed her, closing the door behind me.

"This is unexpected. What brings you here?" I asked but she didn't respond again. I chose to just stand behind her and wait for her to speak. But as I wait in silence I heard sobs coming from her, she covered her mouth and sat on the floor. I panicked, so I rushed in front of her. I knelt to her level and put my hands on her shoulder, shaking her a bit.

"Hey, are you okay? Nayeon, why are you crying?" I asked still shaking her on the shoulders just enough not to hurt her.

"I-I'm sorry Jeongyeon. I'm sorry." She said as she get on her knees and held my left hand with both of her hands.

"For what, Nayeon? You've never done anything wrong." I said as I wiped her tears with my right hand. I slowly guided her to stood up and led her to sat on the couch.

For about an hour, we were just sitting here, with her continuously apologizing to me and me saying that it's okay. She was crying on my chest and I was trying my best to comfort her until she fell asleep.

I waved my hand in front of her face to see if she's in deep sleep. When I made sure that she won't wake up, I lift her up and carried her to my bedroom. I gently put her down, scared that I might wake her up.

When I succeeded on laying her down in my bed, I sat on the side just to adore her face.

"You've been through so much because of me, Nayeon. I'm so sorry for breaking your heart and making you cry." I started talking by myself and held her hand. "You're right, I should've told you before, I should've just ask you to wait for me, I should've just tell you why I left. Maybe it wouldn't be so complicated right now if I did." I continued and tears are forming in my eyes again. I really hate being so weak to cry all the time.

"I was so selfish, I don't deserve you. But I still want to have you,

I want to fight for you.

Even if you have someone else right now,

I want to take you away from that guy.

I want to have you once again,

Even if it's a sin, I'd still want you, because I can commit millions of sins just to have you once again, Nayeon." I said lastly and left a kiss on her forehead before leaving the room.

I just slept on the couch for tonight, I don't want her to think that I'm taking advantage of the situation. I maybe reckless at times but I still know how to respect a girl, especially the girl I love.

I felt like I just closed my eyes when I woke up from my alarm, 5am. I was about to turn it off but someone is holding my hand right now, so I looked down just to see Nayeon sitting on the floor with her head resting on our holding hands.

Did she sleep like this the whole night?

I slowly got up and tap her gently. Her whole body might get numb from her position right now.

"Nayeon wake up." I said as I continued to tap her shoulder. She looked at me and stretched her hands along with my hand that she was holding. "Come on I'll help you get up." I offered my other hand on her that she gladly accepted. She pulled herself up and sat beside me on the couch.

"Why were you sleeping here?" I asked her and she lay down again using my lap as her pillow.

"I can't sleep alone. Stay there for 10 more minutes, my whole body felt numb." She said and reached for my hands again and held it. Before I could even respond, she was fast asleep once again. A sleepy head indeed.

Like she said, I stayed and just watched her sleep on my lap. It's been 30 minutes but I had no plan on waking her up yet. I love watching her fell asleep on me, I felt important seeing her comfortable sleeping on my lap.

I still have no intentions on waking her up but she got up by herself. She yawned and stretched her hands up.

"I'll make us some coffee, wait here." I offered and she nodded. I walked towards the kitchen to make her some coffee, it's perfect because I bought some coffee yesterday. I don't usually stuck things in the condo since I'm not usually home.

I made her coffee the way I remember how she liked it. No cream, just coffee and sugar, just the way I liked it too. I grabbed two mugs with coffee to go to her in the living room but she wasn't there anymore. I looked around and I saw a silhouette in the balcony so I walked towards there and see her sitting on the ledge.

"Here's your coffee." I said and gave her the mug. She smiled to me and accepted it. I froze for a moment because it's my first time seeing her smile at me after 10 years.

I also sat beside, facing her. We were sipping coffee along with the sun rising above us. It was 6am and this is the best morning I have so far, because she's here.

"Do you know that I don't actually like coffee without cream?" She asked all of a sudden and I shook my head as an answer. I should've asked her first on how she likes her coffee, I thought she still likes coffee that way.

"I never liked coffee without milk eversince. It taste so bitter." She said and I furrowed my brows and looked at her.

"Never? How about before? You said that's how you liked your coffee." I said as I took another sip on my coffee.

"Stupid. I only said that because you liked it that way." She giggled as she fiddled with her mug.

"What does that mean?" I cluelessly asked her.

"You see, I was kind of trying to impress you that time. The coffee was so bitter, but I put up with it and drink it because I like you." She said and I looked at her in awe. I never knew she just drink the coffee I liked because she likes me.

"Remember those days in middle school when we always met coincidentally?" She asked and I nodded. "That wasn't coincidence, because I always knew beforehand where you were going, sometimes I even followed you."

"Really? Does that mean you liked me first?" I laughed and she did along with me too.

"That's why I cried when you confessed to me. I never imagined that my longterm crush will actually learn to like me someday. Just like how I learned to like coffee without cream." She happily recollect the happenings from the past.

"I didn't know that you actually liked me." I said and smiled looking at the now completely visible sun.

"Yeah. Those were the happy days." She said and we both smiled at each other before I looked at her lovingly.

"But..." I paused and she looked at me. "Can we have those happy days back Nayeon?" I said and reached out for her hand. "Can we?" I repeated but silence occupied us for a few minutes before she decided to speak.

"I was glad to know the truth eventhough it was too late. I was thankful and apologetic to you because of the sacrifices you made for me. But Jeongyeon..." She pulled her hand and that made me let go. "Things have changed during those 10 years, and I can't help but think that what happened 10 years ago is destiny's way of telling us that we're not meant to be. Maybe it happened because it was fated that we wouldn't end up with one another. Maybe we just met, but we weren't destined for each other." She said and stood up. "I need to go." She said finally before disappearing out of my sight.

I didn't know that my happiness will just last overnight. It feels like everything is being taken away from me, but I couldn't find the strength to stop it from completely disappearing. My feet were numb and my body is weak, I couldn't stand up and I couldn't move. I'm just letting the pain swallow me whole, breaking every bones and killing my soul.

But then I remembered, I left her before, breaking her heart. I gave up before without standing a fight. For the past 10 years I regretted losing her, my one and only love of my life. No, this isn't right, I promised to myself and to her that I won't give up and I won't lose her twice.

And that's when I gained the strength to run after her. I run and run taking the stairs because the elevator is occupied. I can't regret another 10 years of my life losing her just because I let her walked away. If I have to beg, I will. If I have to kneel, I will. I will do everything just to make her come back to me.

I finally reached the ground floor and looked around to look for her. I saw her walking to the streets to call for a cab. I ran after her, shouting her name. I know she heard me but she didn't look back. She hailed a cab and rode at the backseat. But I ran after it eventhough it already took off. I couldn't keep up with its speed but I'll still try and follow her until I can.

After running for it, the cab stopped, she got off and ran back to me, meeting me with a tight hug.

"Why didn't you stop? You stupid ostrich!" She shouted at me but before I could speak, cars began honking behind me. I completely forgot that we were in the middle of the road so I pulled her to the sidewalk and gave her a happy smile.

I was happy that she stopped and came back for me. It was a right decision to run after her afterall.

"Meant to be or not, I don't care. I will pay destiny just to afford my happiness with you Nayeon. So Nayeon, break up with your boyfriend and come back to me, please." I boldly said, I don't care if it sounded so desperate but like I said, I will never lose her twice even if it means stealing her from that guy.

"What the hell are you saying? What boyfriend are you talking about?" She said with her brows furrowed and looking at me with complete confusion.

"Your boyfriend. That guy on the jajangmyeon resto." I said and she laughed so hard over what I said. So now, it was me who's brows are furrowed and looking at her with complete confusion.

"Jinyoung isn't my boyfriend, you silly." She said and continued to laugh but more moderate now.

"Then why did you link your arms on him?!" I said to her that made her stopped laughing and looked down instead.

"I was uhm just trying to get you j-jealous." She hesitantly said, and eventhough she was hiding her face, I know her face is so red right now.

I grinned and cupped her cheeks to make her look at me. And when I looked at her face, she totally looked like a tomato.

"It's all good then." I said and kissed her forehead. I let go of her face and grabbed her hand. "Let's go back to the condo." I put our hands on my hoodie's pocket and continued to walk with her.

"What's good?" She asked looking up at me a bit since she was smaller than me.

"There's no more problem. So that means we're dating again." I declared and her eyes seemed to widen.

"I didn't agree to that!" She contradicts and stopped us both from walking.

"Then will you argue with it?" I asked and continued to walk again. She couldn't do anything so she just walked along.

"N-no." She answered and I smiled.

"It's all good then."