Part X

Kai

Sehun, Taemin, and I were on our way to Xiumin's birthday party. They were chatting about something that had happened at school, but to be very honest, I wasn't really listening. It was only partially on purpose, though. I had been feeling a lot more distracted as of late, so much so that even the guidance counselor noticed and asked me if anything was wrong. I told her it was nothing, blaming my terrible sleep schedule, but I knew exactly what was bugging me--though, I was too afraid to say it out loud. 

Of course, Taemin offered to pay for a place to host the party, so as the self-proclaimed party planner, Luhan chose some community center downtown. Taemin came and picked us up at our place and then drove us down there. 

"Hey, is anything wrong?" I heard Taemin ask me right as I was snapping out my trance. My eyes widened slightly, I looked at him for a moment.

"He's probably still upset about being roasted by Kyungsoo," Sehun commented from the backseat, making me turn around and glare at him. 

"Kyungsoo as in Suho's brother, right? The one we met at the park that one day?" Taemin asked, only glancing into his mirror for a moment before returning his eyes to the road. Sehun nodded his head in response, humming lowly. "I knew he looked familiar before. I've seen him at a few of my dad's fancy corporate parties, I think. He seemed pretty quiet to me."

"Well, I guess Kai is different then." Sehun laughed. 

I rolled my eyes and sighed, frustrated. "Please, he barely roasted me. He just made a very attempt at making himself look less guilty."

"Then why do you seem to be so bothered by it, huh?" Sehun was leading forward now, his hands placed on the back of the passenger's seat.

"Because you keep being an asshole and bringing it up," I said in a louder voice, poking him in his forehead and pushing him into the backseat.

"Whatever, denier," he said, rubbing his forehead a little as he sat back up. "I heard Baekhyun was going to invite him to the party today, so if I were you, I would be preparing to be roasted like a a pepper."

"And if I were you, I'd stop talking before I toss you out of this window," I shot back, getting a chuckle from Taemin. 

Sehun dropped the subject for the rest of the ride to the center, but along the way, I couldn't help but hope Kyungsoo wouldn't show up. I wasn't angry at him or anything like that. What I was feeling was made of pure dread and anxiety. Why had been thinking about him more and more lately was beyond me, but I did know that seeing him again was certainly not the solution.

There were a few cars in the parking lot when we pulled up to the center, and I could vaguely see Luhan and Baekhyun through the large windows out front. We all got out and began walking toward the front door with Taemin walking ahead so he could hold the door open for us. It seemed to me that Baekhyun and Luhan were the only ones there so far, which made me let out a partial sigh of relief. 

"Hey, you guys are early. That's a first," Luhan said once he turned around from hanging decorations and noticed us. 

"You can thank Taemin for that," Sehun replied. "He started calling us an hour before he was gonna leave to come get us and wouldn't stop until one of us answered."

"Then just answer the first time," Taemin said to Sehun, to which he just rolled his eyes. 

"So is, uh, what's his face here? Sehun said you were inviting him," I said, looking around to make sure I hadn't missed seeing Kyungsoo.

"You know his name, Kai, so you don't have to act like you don't," Baekhyun said with a fleeting laugh before carefully stepping down from a small ladder. "And yes, he is. He's back in the kitchen heating up the food we brought."

"You can go say hi if you want," Luhan said, wiggling his eyebrows a little in a teasing manner.

I just shot him a quick glare. "I think I'll be okay," I replied. I saw him laugh and turn back around as I looked away and sighed. Only a couple more minutes passed before Kyungsoo came walking out of the kitchen, coming to an abrupt halt when he noticed we had arrived.

"Hey, Kyungsoo!" Sehun said cheerfully (but also to tease me) as he waved. "How's it going?"

"G-Good," he said, nodding his head and bowing toward us before moving closer to Baekhyun. I vaguely heard him mention something about the food being all ready, but I couldn't make out his exact words even as I watched his lips move. 

"Okay, so his family should be arriving any minute and then all we need is the birthday boy to get here," Luhan said, looking around and exhaling in accomplishment. "I just hope he likes it. I know he's not very fond of surprises..."

"I'm sure he'll love it," Baekhyun reassured him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "And if he doesn't, we'll just never celebrate his birthday again." We all laughed at that, and I briefly made eye contact with Kyungsoo. He looked away almost immediately.

"Where's the bathroom?" I asked. "I didn't get a chance to go before we left."

"Oh, just down that hall. I think it's on the left side," Luhan answered as he point to his right and my left. 

I walked in that direction, trying not to make my footsteps look too rushed. Once I was inside and the door was locked, I placed my hands on the edge of the sink and let go of a breath I had been holding in ever since I saw Kyungsoo walk into the room. I picked up my head and looked in the mirror.

"What is going on with you?" I mumbled to my reflection, thinking it would give me the answer I so desperately needed. It didn't, though.

Kyungsoo

It had been around an hour since the party officially started, and the room had gotten decently packed. I tried to stay around Baekhyun without seeming too clingy, but I decided to go back into the kitchen just to get away for a few minutes. I was under the impression that I was alone when I first stepped in and started to exhale a big breath I had been holding in, truthfully, ever since Kai got there. However, when I turned around, I sucked it right back in.

"Come to get away from the crowd?" Kai asked me from his sitting position on the counter by the sink. 

"I..." Looking around for a second, I cleared my throat and tried to stop the blush from spreading onto my cheeks. "Yeah, I guess I did. W-What about you?"

"Same." He sighed and began swinging his legs back and forth. "I felt like I couldn't breathe in there." I nodded and lowered my head, trying to recall if I saw him slip away or not. "I think I've stress eaten about five cupcakes," he added not even a minute later, prompting me to lift my head again. 

"Y-You liked them?" I said, noticing the small pile of empty cupcake liners next to him. 

He hummed affirmatively and nodded. "Especially the chocolate ones. I can't remember the last time I let myself eat chocolate anything."

"Why not? Do you play sports or something?" Feeling brave, I took a few steps closer to the big island in the center of the kitchen.

"I dance, or at least I try to," he answered, glancing down at his shoes. I observed his body, thinking that it definitely gave away his interest in dancing. "My first instructor told me to stop eating junk food when I was in seventh grade if I wanted to be a successful dancer. My current one doesn't care as much as long as I can execute the steps correctly, but I still haven't indulged myself. Well, at least not until just now."

"Ah, I see," I sad as I nodded my head a few times. The room fell silent for a moment, with only the faint sounds of the party coming in. "I think it's okay to indulge yourself sometimes." My head was down again as I ran my index finger across the counter, but I could Kai look at me. "I think you have to give yourself a break from all the pressure sometimes or else it'll crush you." I didn't meet his eyes until I finished talking, finding myself somehow able to hold onto it without completely melting into a big blob.

"Hey, Jongin, Xiumin is opening his gifts now." We both looked over and saw Taemin enter the kitchen. He looked surprised to see that I was in there. "Oh, hey, I didn't see you sneak off in here, too. Uh, anyway, it's gift time if you want to come back out. Lu and Sehun are already betting on whose gift he'll like better."

"Okay, we'll be right out," Kai said, sending Taemin a small, fleeting smile along with a nod. Taemin nodded back and looked at me once more before exiting the kitchen. Another silence fell upon us as Kai turned his head back to me, our eyes only meeting for a split second this time. "I'll tell the others you're in the bathroom if you want to stay in here a little longer," he said after he slid off the counter and tossed the wrappers in the trash bin. 

"N-No, I'll be out soon," I replied. "I should probably have a cupcake, too, before everyone takes the extras home." 

He actually smiled and laughed a little. "Alright, see ya out there," he said, shoving his hands in his pocket and then disappearing around the corner. 

A smile seemed to naturally appear on my face as I turned back around. Letting out a light breath, I walked over to the box of cupcakes, carefully pulling out a chocolate one. I peeled back some of the wrapper and took a small bite, smiling to myself in pride. They were pretty good.