Had been counting the days

Jay's POV

What did he said just now, he chose me but every time I was left behind and he's the one to disappear. I don't know what to say but all I know is I suffered a lot and not only me many people cried for him.

"Do you even know how things were back then? huh? Do you even know the condition of people you left behind? The people who cried for you, whose world was formed around you?", I couldn't control myself but let my tears fall off, my voice became too heavy, and my lips resisted moving but today I wanted to say everything I was holding inside.

"Your brothers, I don't know if they know about you being alive but when I last met them, they're broken. Keigan who used to hide his emotions cried by hugging me and little Keiran for whom you're both of parents was lost. He lived with me for a month, then your uncle took him away".

"Everyone thought you were no more. How many times they stopped themselves from crying, Aries, he used to stare at your balcony and car for hours, maybe you'll appear of nowhere and hug him, Kuya Angelo, even he used to take your name whenever aunt used to cook good, I saw pain of losing you. Yuri, Percy and Alex, even though you're not on good terms they cried for losing you".

He was just staring at me with a blank face, was my voice even going into his ears, was I even making sense to him? His lips finally moved, "and you? you cried?".

I'm still crying, even when you're standing in front of me, because there is still too much distance between, you have not told me where the hell you're? did you really fake it all?

I smirked, "me? do you care? or wanna feel proud that you made people cry? made a girl cry over you?". I see no change in his expressions, but I was full today, I want to throw out everything, "I did, I fucking cried for you, I missed you Keifer. I shed my tears off by thinking of you, there were only our memories you left, I cried by hugging your t-shirts, I cried while eating your fav soups, I cried...", my knees became weak, and I sat on the floor.

I don't know how come human body have this much water to flow out of eyes, my tears were unstoppable, "Keifer, you're so selfish that you only do the things as per your own wish, never care about what others want. You're so full of yourself that it doesn't matter if you and your things affect others. And even your mere presence did it, I didn't give up when you avoided me, pushed me away, and I chose to stay when you asked me to. But you disappeared and out of nowhere you're here and trying to re-enter. And then it's me, a fool, who still loves you, when...". I guess I was out of my words, I was overwhelmed with my overflowing emotions.

"When?", his voice was too low, "when you don't care about my feelings, I gave my everything but what did you do? planned your own death, did you really fake it all?", I threw a fist into the wall.

"I've been counting months since you're gone, and it's almost a year Keifer, a year of thinking I can't get you back, a year I thought I lost you for forever, but here it's you enjoying, ran off your responsibility, by leaving everyone crying for you. It's been a whole fucking year, Keifer, you know how much I missed you".

"One year, one months and six days, five hours since I hugged you", he took a pause, "eleven months, seventeen days and twelve hours since I kissed you and saw you; ten months five days and seven hours since I heard your voice", a lone year escaped his eyes, "and zero fucking second since I stopped loving you", He said while his voice was trembling.

I saw that he closed his eyes and let the tears fall. I don't know what he said, "you said you're counting months; I counted everyday we're apart, every fucking moment I missed you, even for two months I was unconscious, but I exactly remember when we parted away, our lasts".

He sat down on his knees, "you said I'm selfish, maybe yes but only if thinking about you every time when we're away is my selfishness. I do everything by myself but always for my loved ones, I don't how it turns out to be opposite" He was crying, weeping and sniffing, I sat beside him and tried to know what he wanted to convey. He looked into my eyes, "Jay, I was coming, everything was going well but...", he stopped.

I was assuming all this time that something really happened to him, but what I don't know, he was not ready to tell and maybe my frustration will let him say. I know my words were harsh but true, I only said what was in my heart and I also want to know his side. I held his hands, "tell me Keifer, just tell me why you didn't come? where were you?".

He became silent, "Everyone thinks Elder Watson is no more and Keigan is the new heir of Watson Enterprises, it means you're not in London either then where were you? what actually happened to you Keifer?", I can only see his expressionless face, I know he wanted to cry, I held his hands, "I can't forget the way you healed me, and now it's my turn", and cupped his face, "tell me".

He broke down and hugged me tightly, "I escaped the death but Jay, but I die many a time after that while missing you and longing for your presence, I want so badly to be with you, ", he was sobbing but trying to control himself, I patted his back, "relax... relax, I'm here".

He tightened his grip around me, almost strangling me but all I know is he's broken and he needs me in the same way I need him, I was rubbing his back continuously, "they betrayed me, my family even my own brother, they all conspired against me to take my everything away". I was shocked to hear his own brother it means Keigan, what did he do?

Keifer backed off, "I was not running away but they planned it all, it's not a plane crash but a planned murder, but somehow I escaped it. but maybe it'd better if I died atleast I've not to see the real face of my family, of my brother". he looked in my eyes, "I wanted to fight but I had no one by my side, I was all alone struggling to stay alive, I lost my everything but losing you shattered me to the core".

"I really can't understand this all, Keigan betrayed you? or why didn't came back to me?", I calmly said without breaking the eye contact, "I was not even able to fight for myself, how come I can even think of come back to you. I promised that I'll become stronger and protect you, but I just turned into a timid, a loser".

I clenched my jaws to stop myself from crying, "I was not with you for protection but because I loved you, I loved you from all my heart, and I could've protected you, we'd have fought together" 

He hugged me again, "I didn't want you to drag in my unstable life again, apart from it, Angelo told me you've moved on, I wanted you to be happy and decided to restart my life as Keeper".

My eyes widened, "Kuya knows about you", he nodded. Damn, he hid it from me that's why he sent me away so that I'll never be able to see him again, "it's all written Keifer, destiny brought us together again".

He cupped my face, 'of course, the reason I'm alive is our memories together, I isolated myself, the Keifer you used to know was lost but ever since you're back in my life I'm feeling strong again, I'm ready to fight for you with everyone, even with God". 

Still there are many questions left Keifer, but I know it's tough for you to answer them right now, whatever I'm here with you, I can't see my man to be broken but I'll stand with him and help him to become the man he was, the unbeatable Mark Keifer Watson. 

He placed his head into my lap, "I don't want anything as long as you're here with me, and I don't need to be an heir but you're enough for me Jay, and now I'm nothing but a loser, still I promise I'll become...", before he said anything I placed my lips over his lips to make him silent, "you're most strong man". and I wrapped my hands around him. 

To be continued...

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Hi! Hope you're all well, this chapter is the result of my overthinking and insomnia, and also one of the inspiration reason I started this story.