Chapter 45

After four days stayed in hospital, I finally went home yesterday and today is the time for me to back to school to finish those exams that I've been skipped since I was sick.

"Sorry, I'm late, Mr. Schue." I walk into the choir room while put my book into my ransel.

No answer.

I turn my face and it's empty choir room. I look at my watch and glee club starts in the next ten minutes. The others must be late and I'm too early.

Suddenly there are some giggle until I see the band giggles at me. I just giggle and smile shyly at them. Oh damn.

I place my ransel on top the piano and take my music sheet and start playing the piano. I have to practice for my nationals solo.

Bianca:Like a small boatOn the oceanSending big wavesInto motionLike how a single wordCan make a heart openI might only have one matchBut I can make an explosion

And all those things I didn't sayWrecking balls inside my brainI will scream them loud tonightCan you hear my voice this time?

This is my fight songTake back my life songProve I'm alright songMy power's turned onStarting right now I'll be strongI'll play my fight songAnd I don't really care if nobody else believes'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me

Losing friends and I'm chasing sleepEverybody's worried about meIn too deepSay I'm in too deepAnd it's been two yearsI miss my homeBut there's a fire burning in my bonesStill believeYeah, I still believe

And all those things I didn't sayWrecking balls inside my brainI will scream them loud tonightCan you hear my voice this time?

This is my fight songTake back my life songProve I'm alright songMy power's turned onStarting right now I'll be strongI'll play my fight songAnd I don't really care if nobody else believes'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me

A lot of fight left in me

Like a small boatOn the oceanSending big wavesInto motionLike how a single wordCan make a heart openI might only have one matchBut I can make an explosion

This is my fight song Take back my life songProve I'm alright songMy power's turned onStarting right now I'll be strongI'll play my fight songAnd I don't really care if nobody else believes'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me

No I've still got a lot of fight left in me

I ended up my song with full of claps from the glee club member who already sat down on their seats. I just smile shyly at them and take my ransel then sit down on a chair next to Ryder.

"You're amazing!" Ryder put his hand around my shoulder.

"Guys, there is carrer fair! For the senior! It's cool to choose your future!" Marley walks in with Unique.

"Yeah New York!!" Blaine and I hi-five each other.

"New York we are coming!" Artie and Sam grinned.

"You guys planning to New York and have a bright future. I dont know what I'm going to do after graduation." Tina says hopelessly.

"How many times I told you we are gonna make it to New York, Tina. Go with us." Blaine walks to the front.

"I'm planning to enter a jewish university in New York but I know I wont make it. Artie and Bianca will go to NYU. Blaine has NYADA. Sam want to be a model there and me? I'm a loser." Tina sighs.

"We are loser." I walk to the front and standing next to Blaine.

"All of us are loser." Artie and Sam walk to the front.

"You wanna be, you wanna be a loser like me." I'm singing and take Tina's hand to the front.

Blaine walks to the piano and sits down in front of it and Sam grabs a guitar. Blaine start playing the guitar and singing.

Blaine:You may think that I'm a zeroAnd everyone you wanna beProbably started off like me

You may say that I'm a freak showBut give it just a little timeI bet you're gonna change your mind

Sam (and Bianca and Blaine):All of the dirt you've been throwing my way(It ain't so hard to take)'Cause I know one day you'll be screaming my name(And I'll just look away)Yeah I'll just look away

Artie and Tina (Tina):Just go ahead and hate on me and run your mouthSo everyone can hearHit me with the worst you've got, knock me downBaby, I don't careKeep it up and soon enough you'll figure outYou wanna be, you wanna beA loser like me (Mmh)

Artie:A loser like me

Sam:Push me up against the locker, oh

Artie and Tina:All I do is shake it offI'll get you back when I'm your boss

Sam:I'm not thinking 'bout you haters, no

Artie and Tina:And I could be a superstarI'll see you when you wash my car

Bianca and Blaine (Blaine):(And) all of the dirt you've been throwing my way(It ain't so hard to take on, and)I know one day you'll be screaming my nameAnd I'll just look away

Artie, Bianca and Sam (and Tina):Just go ahead and hate on me (and run your mouth)

Artie, Bianca and Tina (and Sam):So everyone can hear(Hit me with the worst you've got and knock me down) (Blaine: Yeah)Baby, I don't care(Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out)You wanna be, you wanna beA loser like me (Blaine: Ooh) (Tina: Yeah, yeah)A loser like me

Sam:Oh-woah-ohOh-woah-oh

Sam and Bianca (and Blaine):Oh-woah-oh(Ooh)Oh-woah-oh (Blaine: Oh-woah)Oo-woah-oh (Blaine: Oh-woah)

Bianca, Blaine, Sam, and Tina (Artie):Oh-woah-oh(Just go ahead)Go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth (Run your mouth)So everyone can hearHit me with the worst you've got and knock me down (Knock me down)(and Artie: Baby, I don't care)Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out

Bianca, Sam and Tina:You wanna be (Blaine: You wanna be, yeah)You wanna be

Bianca, Blaine, Sam, and Tina:A loser like me (Artie: You)

Artie:A loser like me

Bianca, Blaine, Sam, and Tina (and Artie):A loser (like me)

"We missed one part..." I chuckle at them.

"What part?" Artie frowns. "Oh I get it!" Artie chuckles.

Artie, Bianca, Blaine, Sam and Tina:Hey you over there keep the L up in the airHey you over there keep the L up cause I dont careYou can throw your sticks and your can throw stones like the rocketJust watch me goYeah L-O-S-E-RI can only be who I am

We are chuckle and hugging each other at the end of this song.

"So New York?" Blaine raise his eyebrows at Tina.

"I will go to Brown University!" Tina smiles at us.

"That's Tina!" Sam smiles at her.

"That song was cool." Marley says.

"Yeah it was an original song that made us won for regionals." Artie says.

"But lose in nationals. Even you guys got in the twelve place." I simply said. "Because of Finn and Rachel magical kisses."

"That was disgusting." Tina rolls her eyes.

"The kisses?" I raise my eyebrows.

"Yeah sort of." Artie frowns.

"Ewww." I curl my lips.

"Jake, coach Sylvester called you!" Kitty walks in with an angry face.

"Wait what happen?" Artie frowns.

I turn my face at Ryder and raise my eyebrows and he just shrugs. Jake left the choir room with a frown from everyone eyes. Is this something connected with Bree?

"What happen, Kitty?" Marley asks.

"I dont want to tell this but I know how it hurts and I'm so sorry, Marley." Kitty says.

"What?" Marley frowns.

"You know the consequences dating Puckerman right? Even though he changed into a good guy but they cant handle those kind of pleasing and teasing. Well not only a Puckerman but another guy cant handle that." I said to her while take a look at Sam a bit.

"I dont understand what are you talking about, Bianca." Marley frowns.

"Jake kind of have a thing with Bree and now she is pregnant." Kitty simply says.

"What? She is pregnant?" I gasp.

"No! It's impossible." Marley shake her head then crying.

"I'm sorry, Marley. I cant hold it anymore because hold the truth behind a lie is hurt. Bianca and I already know about that since we were doing Katy and Gaga number but we agreed that we dont want to tell you until you found out by yourself but now I think this is too much. I mean, he is getting someone pregnant. Bianca and I know how it felt to be cheated on and that's why we kept it until this time." Kitty explains.

Marley cover her face with her hands. I come over to her and comfort her. "Just crying out loud if you want but after that stop crying because a guy like that never deserve your tears."

"I already know there is a stranger act from Jake these weeks." Marley is sobbing.

I look at the others and they just gasped then turn my face to Sam who keep his head down. I know he is feeling guilty because he did the same thing to me.

"Stop crying, Marley. Your cry makes me wanna cry." My eyes glacing.

"I'm so sorry." Kitty says.

"You dont need to say sorry. It wasnt your fault." Marley sobs. "I just wanna go home right now. Thanks for telling me the truth. You guys are the best." Marley wipe her tears and take her bag.

"Unique can drive you home." Unique says to her.

She shake her head. "No thank you, guys." Marley turns her face at us then walk off.

I just half-smile at her and wipe my tears. I really know how it feels because I got the same things and it was really hurt.

"B, you cried?" Blaine asks me.

I sob and shake my head. "No. I didnt." I wipe my tears and smile at Blaine.

"Poor that innocent girl." Unique sighs.

"We already told her at first that Jake is a womanizer." Tina says.

"I think Mr. Schue isnt coming. We waste our time here." I take my ransel from my seat.

"You're right." Tina nods.

Ryder put his hand around my shoulder and I put my hand wrap his waist. I'm still sobbing. We then walk out from the choir room and he kisses my head and rubs my back.

"I know you feel what Marley's feel but dont worry, I'm here, baby." Ryder says to me.

"This is worse than what I got. I mean he got someone pregnant, Ryder." I sigh.

"I know that and I know how it hurts." Ryder rubs my back.

"You wont cheat behind my back, right?" I turn my face at him.

"Why should I? You're already perfect for me and I wont do stupid things like your exes did. Dont think about that. I love you, Bianca." Ryder stops his way.

"Awww I love you too." I kiss him.

"This is first time you kissed me." Ryder chuckles.

"Do you want to cuddle with me in my room with my big purple dino?" I raise my eyebrows.

"Your Barney is like a real Barney from the TV. Sure I really want to." Ryder smiles at me.

"That was my gift for my ten birthday. My parents gave me that because Barney is my guilty pleasure." I chuckle and get into his car.

"I can see that." Ryder chuckle and start his car then drive away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You dont skip the lunch right?" Ryder asks me while laying on my bed.

"No. I ate lunch. Why?" I answer while sitting down on the sofa near the window.

"I just dont want you to get sick and get into hospital again then I found out your ex was there taking care of you." Ryder says.

I close my book and place it on my table then jump on top of him. "You were jealous with Sam?" I raise my eyebrows.

"You dont know that I'm jealous with him like everyday. I can see that he is still in love with you because he looked at you differently, baby."

"Babe, Sam and I over. There is only you and me. Ryder and Bianca. Dont be so jealous." I move from his body and sit down on my bed with my back against the wall. "Come here." I take his body and make him lay his body on my lap. "You're such a big guy." I chuckle.

"But his grade is better than me even we both same have dyslexic. He is quarterback and I'm just another football player." Ryder sighs.

"I dont care he is a quarterback or even a president of US. I dont care. The thing is, I'm with you right now and for me you are the best guy in this world." I smile at him.

"I love you so much." Ryder smiles at me.

"I love you too, Rydie." I give him a quick kiss on his lips. "I'm still feel pity with Marley." I sigh.

"Baby, I wont make you cry like that." Ryder kisses my hand.

"Stay here for a night? I really want to sleep next to someone tonight." I said to Ryder.

"I'd love to. My parents must be know I'm here." Ryder chuckles.

"Of course he can guess that easily." I chuckle.

"Come here." Ryder leaves my lap and pull my body and make me layin my body next to him.

I make aslant backing him and he make aslant and make my back against his chest and he put his hand around my belly then his chin touch my top head. I close my eyes and fall alseep in his hug.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Blaine, did you see my blue pencil case?" I walk into the choir room.

"In your locker?" Blaine raise his eyebrows.

"Not there." I shake my head.

"In your bag?" Blaine raise his eyebrows again.

I didnt say anything but I take all my stuff out from my bag and place it on an empty seat next to me. An iPad, two iPods, an iPhone, earphones, sketch book, lip balm, one notebook, some keys, and one pen.

"I lost my expensive limited edition drawing pen." I groan. "Oh no! My barney flashdisk also there. It's limited edition."

"We can buy it again after this." Ryder try to calm me down.

"Just let her lose her stuff, Ryder. It's a strange when Bianca not lose something. I'm tired to tell her everyday to be careful." Blaine says.

I roll my eyes and put all my stuff back into my bag.

"You left this under your table when you went out from the class." Someone give me my pencil case.

I turn my face to that person and Sam is the one who gave me that. I take my pencil case from his hand and half smile at him. "Thanks, Sam."

"It's okay." Sam simply said and walk off to his seat.

I have a class with Sam today and I sat down in front of him during that class. I dont know that my pencil case is fall down and he found it. But how could he knows this is mine? Idiot, he sat down behind you, B.

I put my pencil case into my bag and turn my face to the front until Mr. Schue walks in.

"Guys! Today we will chose the setlist for nationals. We will sing America by Niel Diamond and I'm Still Havent Found What I'm Looking For. And Bianca can choose what song she want to sing for nationals." Mr. Schue says to us.

"It's Ain't It Fun by Paramore. That song is like my moodbooster song and I guess that everyone loves that." I grin.

"B, isnt that song is too punk?" Artie turns his face at me.

"Nope. It's easy listening and usually play on radio." I said to Artie.

"Yeah I ever heard that song. Sounds cool." Sam nods as agree.

"Actually we usually sing rock song like Queen, Bon Jovi, even The Beatles. Why dont we try this one and remake it." I said to them.

"Yeah new number will be cool, guys." Mr. Schue nods as agree.

"So I will have solo with that song, right? Yeay." I'm clapping happily.

"Yes you will." Mr. Schue smiles at me.

"Thank you, Mr. Schue." I smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I take a cold drink from refrigerator. Sam and Tina are here. They said that they want to watch movie and study together in Blaine's room.

I take my chips also cold water and close the refrigerator and turn my body but suddenly crush someone and my water pour to his clothes.

"I'm so sorry. That's my bad. I'm always careless. I know that." I said to Sam.

"If you're not crush someone or lose something, that's not you." He rolls his eyes.

"That's your fault. What are you doing in my kitchen?" I raise my eyebrows.

"I want to take water but you pour it into my shirt not my throat."

"I said sorry okay." I roll my eyes. "Oh wait. I remember something. Stay here. Dont go away." I said to him and left my chips and my water to the table.

I make a little run to walk downstairs and get into the wardrobe room. I remember that I still have his clothes in my wardrobe. I take his long sleeve shirt and walk back to the kitchen.

He is still there and eating my chips. He realize that I'm here and he giggles and pretend like doing nothing.

"Change your shirt." I give his shirt to him.

"You still have my clothes?" He raise his eyebrows.

"There are two hoodies left in my wardrobe. You want to change your clothes or not? Or I will cut off this shirt." I glare at him.

"Dont be so rude when you can be so cute. Thanks anyway." He smirks at me and take his clothes.

He open up his shirt right in front of me and I suddenly cover my eyes with my hand. "Ewwww."

"Like you never seen me naked or topless before." Sam says and throw his wet clothes to my face.

"I will make this shirt as the mop for this wet floor!" I groan and throw his shirt to the floor.

"Okay so this chip is mine now." Sam takes my chips away.

I take his wet shirt from the ground and groan. He take my chips and walk out from the kitchen.

I pull his long hair and jump to his back and take my chip but he hold it. "Sam Evanssssssss!!!!" I shout right on his ear.

"You're getting fatter now! Get off from my back." Sam groans.

"No fucking way! Give me back my chips or I'll kill you!" I yell and still hangin on his back as I cross my leg on his hips.

"This is yummy. Where did you buy that?" Sam simply asks.

"Walmart near school." I answer. "Wait, you eat that too much! I will get a scissors and cut your hair into bald." I warn him.

"Like you can haha." Sam laughs.

"I can! Bring me to that stationary drawer and take a scissor from there." I said to him and pointed to a drawer.

"How much weight you lose now? You seems quiet light in weight." Sam asks.

"About three pounds because of that sick beside when I was in hospital I didnt eat much." I said to him. "Wait, why you keep distracting me?" I sigh.

"That's your weakness and only me who knows that." Sam laughs.

I just roll my eyes. I cross my leg on his hips and cross my hand around his shoulder. He keep eating my chips and didnt care about me so I pinch his nose and cover his mouth with my left hand.

"You cant eat that now haha." I made an evil laugh.

"I can eat your little finger if you want."

"I can eat your face."

"You wanna make out with me?"

"Who says I wanna make out with you, idiot!" I roll my eyes.

"Fine, we can share." Sam feed me that chips when I'm still on his back.

"That's too small." I protest. "Beside that's mine not yours." I cover his face with his wet shirt.

"This shirt really smell." Sam says.

I take his shirt and smell it. A special smell of someone. "Idiot, this is your smell." I roll my eyes.

"Haha idiot, why you smell it too?" Sam laughs.

"I didnt."

"I can see that even I cant see clearly what you're doing behind my back."

"Cheating with a fake nurse." I whisper on his ear.

"I broke up with that nurse." Sam protest. "For how long you wanna stay on my back like I'm carrying a monkey."

"I'm not a monkey, trouty mouth!" I yell. "Give me back my chips so I will leave your back."

"What if I dont want to?"

"Fine, I will be your worst nightmare in the night with thunderstorm and heavy rain."

"I'm not afraid with that. The one who's afraid with that is you not me!"

"Alright you win." I roll my eyes. "Give me back my chips please." I beg.

"No I dont want to." He shake his head.

"Fine! I'll stay like this." I simply said.

"Fine! Your body is not heavy like usual so I dont mind."

"You mean that I was fat?" I yell.

"I didnt say you were fat. I just said that your body was heavy not like right now." Sam laughs.

I cover his mouth with my hand. "You know that fat is not in a girl words dictionary."

"What the hell are you guys doing?" Blaine walks in and frowns at us.

"Nothing." I giggle and leaves his back. "I'm gonna wash this shirt." I said to them and walk off to the laundry room.

Sam's POV

"What the hell are you guys doing?" Blaine walks in and frowns at us.

"Nothing." Bianca giggle and leaves my back. "I'm gonna wash this shirt." She said to us and walks off.

Blaine turn his face at me and raise his eyebrows. "I was wondering how come Sam took about one hour only for take a drink. And here he is and flirting with my sister who is his ex." Blaine take a glass of water.

"You ruined our cute moment." I pouted at Blaine.

"What cute moment?" Blaine frowns.

"We suddenly crushed and she spurt my shirt with water then she gave me this new clean shirt that I dont know she still have my shirt and my hoodies then I took her chips, until she jumped onto my back and we were laughing and talking until you caught us." I explain.

"Cant deny that you both is still in love each other." Blaine simply said and walk off.

I just frowned and stand here until I take that potato chips and follow Blaine.

"You think she is still have feeling for me?" I ask Blaine.

"Your hoodies is still in her wardrobe. She is cleaning your shirt now and you dont know that Bianca never clean her clothes because we have servant who did that everyday. She still have your necklace on her drawer. And I'm still save her ring that she was asking for and I guess she already forget about that." Blaine says to me.

"Really? That's sweet." I smile.

"Just be patient. I believe that one day you both will back together." Blaine hold my shoulder.

"I hope so." I'm smiling.

Yeah soon or later, we will back together. We will live in New York and I will get many chance to get her back.

--------------------------------------------------------