Chapter 7: Tomorrow Is A New Beginning

Today is the day. Today is the day I completely move out of my grandma's house. Today is the day it is no longer her home. Today is the day I officially move into Michael's apartment. Never thought any of this would ever happen. But, I must stay strong and positive because Michael is by my side and believes in me. It's just going to be so hard to let go. But, I must let go and move on. I need peace in my heart and in my soul. Michael has been so great to me. Never giving up on me. I just wish I wasn't falling for him like I am. There's just something about him. He does thing to my heart and soul. I don't understand it but, I'm so happy. I'm so happy just being next to him. We don't even need to talk. Just having him here with me is all I need. What will happen once things go back normal when I finally settle in and my grandma's funeral. He'll go back to work and I'll just be his roommate. He will be coming and going. I'll just be there like hey don't forget about me please. 

"Hey Maya are you ready?" Michael ask bringing me out of my thought. 

I didn't realize I was just staring at my reflection. I'm in good spirits but, apart of me still hurts. I'm just not good with change.

"Even in the most simplest outfit you are so beautiful and stunning." 

"Thank you so much Michael." I say looking at him. 

And of course he always takes my breath away every time I look at him. Every time I look at him I find him more handsome than before. I can't help how I feel. He makes my heart smile. He makes me feel all different types of emotions I never felt before. How is that even possible.

He's so beautifully handsome. I'm so attracted to this man it's unbelievable. 

"Handsome as always Michael." I say smiling at him. 

"Thank you." He says shyly. 

"I can't believe this is it." I say taking a deep breath. 

"It's the start of a new beginning. Better things for now on. Pure happiness and true love in your future." He says coming closer to me and softly touches my face. "I have a promise to you and your grandmother I plan on keeping forever."

I look into his big cocoa brown eyes and bite my lip. He does so many things to me. He comes closer to my face and presses his forehead against mine. What is he doing? I can't take my eyes off of his. I'm so drawn to him. His other hands cups my other cheek. 

"Maya." He whispers. "Please tell me what is in your heart?" 

What? What is this man trying to do to me? Are my emotions just a game too him? I'm trying so hard not to fall for him. What is he doing now to me? 

"You already know the answer to that." I say lowly. 

I'm trying to look away from him so hard. But, I just can't seem to. I'm so drawn to him. 

"Please." He softly says. "I need to hear you say it." 

Why are his eyes glued to mine. His brown eyes are so beautiful. 

"Just look in the mirror." I whisper. 

My heart is beating so fast right now. Why is he doing this to me? What am I supposed to do? Maybe I should just tell him. Tell him that I like him so much. That he has my heart. How he really makes me feel. 

"Michael."

Before I can even get my words out. He wraps his arms around me. Pulling me into a deep hug. Maybe I'm just reading into it way too much. It's probably all in my head. I wrap my arms around him and let out a heavy sigh. But I still can't help how he makes me feel. 

"I need you so much Maya. Please never stop needing me. Because If you do I will lose my whole world, heart and my soul."

"Michael, I need forever with you." 

"Hey, are you guys ready?" Bill asks peaking his head through the doorway. 

We looked at him but neither one of us let go of each other. Thanks for reminding me Bill that I am leaving today. I slowly pull away and sigh heavily. 

"Hey are you okay?" Michael asks. 

"Yeah, It's just hard letting go." I say looking around my now empty bedroom. "I grew up in this room. So much has happened in this house. Good and bad." 

"Now it's time to make new memories. Hopefully with me forever." 

I look back at him. I smile at him. I'm excited but, how much will change in my life? Will we still be able to spend time with each other like we do now? 

"Thank you so much." I take a deep breath. "I'm ready now." 

I intertwine my fingers with Michael's and we follow Bill out the room. Well, this is it. I place the keys on the counter and never let go of Michael's hand. I close the front door behind us as we walk out. But I stand there with my hand on the door. He doesn't say anything. He just gives my hand a few supportive squeezes. 

"Goodbye." I say and take a deep breath. "Hello my future." I say after I turn around and face Michael.

He smiles at me. We walk down the few steps and I let Bill drive my grandmother's car and Michael and I sat in the back seat and one of his body guards sat in the front. I cling to Michael's arm like static cling. I want to cry so badly but I refuse to. I've cried too much already. I should save my tears for when I bury my grandmother. I really hope Michael is by my side. Because I'm going to need him more than ever. I feel his lips connect with my forehead and I can't help but smile. He really has saved me from total darkness. From myself. 

"Thank you." I say before placing a kiss on his cheek. 

Awe he's blushing. I swear he's so adorable. 

"Thank you Maya." He says smiling shyly. 

"Here's to a brighter future." I say and kiss him on the cheek again. "Here's too a lifetime of memories." I say kissing him again. "To pure happiness." I place another kiss on his cheek. "To something real." I say and hug him tight. 

"Maya." He says and hugs me back. "I promise you." He whispers. 

I feel his body tremble. Is he crying? I try to pull away but his grip is too strong. He buries his head into my neck. My body shivers from the warmth of his breath. 

"Michael." I whisper into his ear. "I got you. I always will. You'll never lose me. I need you. I'll always need you. You can always run to me. No matter how you are feeling. Good or bad. Happy or sad. Angry or hurt. Just always need me please." I say as I slowly start crying. 

I told myself I wasn't going to cry but here I am. It hurts that I need him so bad because I like him so much. I know he only sees me as his best friend. How and when did my feelings get so deep for him? I wasn't trying to fall for him. I wasn't looking for this. I barely was looking for a friendship. But, he broke down my barriers, my walls and found his way into my heart. A place I hope he will stay forever. But, no matter what happens. He's always going to have a special place in my heart. Whether we stay best friends forever or his career takes him away from me. Or even. Even. Another girl takes him away. As long as he is happy that is the only thing that matters. I'll be okay I guess. I will just have to survive. 

"Please don't ever leave me Michael. I don't want to live my life without you." I say. 

"Maya, I need you too bad. I crave your presence. You are my best friend. You are apart of me. I can't lose you. I don't ever want to lose you. I would give up everything just to keep you in my life. You are my happiness. I wouldn't be able to live if I ever lost you.

My eyes grow wide. Did I really say that out loud. But, did he really mean what he said? Am I really that important to him? I feel the car stop but I refuse to let him go. I swear our moments keep getting interrupted. 

"Hey boss man we are here." Bill says. 

We both sigh and pull away. He really was crying. I reach up and wipe his fallen tears and he wipes mine. We both find ourselves laughing. 

"Awe man we are an emotional mess." I say still laughing. 

"I swear you bring so many sides of me out. Thank you for helping me get more in touch with my inner self. I'm so glad you are always going to be by my side."

"Forever." I whisper. 

"Now let's go so you can settle in your new home." He says. "Our home." He says smiling big. 

================================================================================================================================================================

I swear I am so amazed by this man. He calls this an apartment? It's more like a penthouse or something. It's so big and he was living here by himself? I love the kitchen it's so big. I hope he doesn't have a personal chef because I want to be the only person that cooks for him. Further in more is the living room with a huge sofa couch and a big ass screen TV.  I hope there are many movie nights on that couch with him. Then we get to my bedroom. My room. Gosh it's so beautiful. Everything was set up for me. It looks so much like my old room. From the colors to the way my furniture is set up. I turn around hoping Michael was there but he wasn't. I peak out the room seeing he's in a deep conversation with Bill. He looks a little mad. I hope he's okay. I dare not eavesdrop on their conversation. I take a seat at the edge of my already made bed. I guess all I have left to do is put away my clothes and my little trinkets and pictures. I sigh as I kick my shoes off. I bring my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around them. I really should just get done with. No sense in just sitting around feel down about myself. Especially about something I can not change. I get up and go to one of the many boxes that hold my clothes. I go into the box that holds my hair scarfs. I find my favorite blue and orange one. Tying my hair up. 

I should probably get comfortable too. Maybe some pajamas. Some really comfy ones. I'm glad I put my clothes in these boxes in order. Clothes that I'm going to hang up. Even which draw they are going into. I grab a shirt and my spandex shorts. I place them on the bed just as there's a light knock on the door. I turn around seeing Michael standing there. He smiles at me and I smile at him as I walk up too him. 

"Hey best friend." I greet. 

His smile fades and he sighs. 

"Michael, what's wrong?" I ask. 

"I have to leave you for at least an hour."

"Why?" I whine. 

"There's a problem with my brothers at the studio."

I feel so sad right now. I just got here and he has to leave me here by myself. What am I supposed to do while he's gone? 

"Okay." I say looking down at my feet.

"Hey." He says hooking my chin and making me look at him. "Please don't be sad. I know I'm going to miss you so much. I've gotten so use to being next to you every second. But, I promise you I'm going to return to you. You got me girl. You'll always have me."

"I'm going to miss you too. I'll just have to keep myself occupied while you are gone."

"This place is yours. So use whatever you want. Touch whatever you want. Get comfortable. This is your home now. I'm not going to lie. I love the idea of coming home to you every night. It's such a beautiful thought." He says smiling.

"Are you leaving now?"

"Yeah." He says sadly. "Why did you have to remind me." He says with even more sadness. 

"I'm sorry Michael." I say in the same tone. "Can I walk you to the door handsome."

"Please beautiful." He says and intertwines my hand with his. 

I cling to his arm like before as we walk to the front door. I haven't even been here a full thirty minutes and he's already leaving me. This really sucks. 

"Hey, I'll be back before you know it." He says smiling at me. 

I know he's forcing that smile but I won't press it. I wrap my arms around him and bury my face into his chest. 

"Promise me you will return." I say holding back my tears. 

"Always." He says wrapping his arms around me. "I need you and knowing you'll always need me I'll always return to you." He says squeezing me tight. 

"I need you now." I say into his chest. 

"I need you now too. But, I must settle this problem and I will return to you. I promise you won't ever lose me." 

"I can't lose anyone else. Especially you."

"Please don't hurt anymore. I know you've been through so much pain. Just always remember as long as you need me I'm always going to be here. Maybe not always physically. But spiritually, and mentally. I'm always in your heart. Love is real and it exists in both of us for each other."

There's that word love again. Why do I like him so much? I shouldn't be getting so close to him. He's leaving. Everyone always leave me. I'm not special enough for people to stay in my life. People use me til they no longer need me and Michael no longer needs me. 

"As much as I would just love to hold you forever. I must part from you for a little while. But I'm going to come right back. I promise you that." He says. 

I pull myself away from him and swallow my tears. No crying in front of him. Don't show him how weak you are. He doesn't care. He's just using you for his loneliness. Forget about him. Focus on you and doing what you need to do. I just need to disappear away from everyone. Go somewhere they don't know me. So I can never have to go through this again. I hate this pain I feel in my chest when people leave. But why does it hurt so bad that he's leaving? I sigh and back up a little. I look away from him. I don't want him to see how hurt I really am right now. 

"Well I hope you fix that problem. I guess I'll be here when you return." I say shrugging my shoulders. "It's not like I have anything better to do." I says lowly. 

"Maya." He says shocked. "Please." He says walking up to me and I back up. "Please don't do this. I'm coming right back. I always will. Especially to you." He says before pulling me back in. 

"Just go please. I need to be a big girl and learn." I say trying so hard not to cry. 

"I hate feeling like you are disappointed in me."

"I'm not. I just don't want to be apart from you. But, I know you have a busy life. I could never interfere with that. You can't disappoint your fans. Hell I am one of them. I'm just having a moment but I will be okay. I promise you that. You are prolonging the inevitable. Don't make this any harder than it already is."

"I'm going to miss you so much. But, you will be on my mind every second." He says before placing a kiss on my forehead. 

"Thank you Michael. I'm going to do the same. You should already know that."

"What will you do while I am gone?"

"Unpack and blast your music like I usually do." I say cheesing at him. 

"I love how you are such a big fan."

"The biggest. I be fangirling sometimes." I say laughing. 

"Fangirling?" He says laughing. 

"Yup." I say popping the p. 

I stick my tongue out at him. 

"Girl you are too much. But, truly amazing and one of a kind." He says laughing. 

"Thank you. Now go." I say laughing. "I think Bill is growing impatient." 

"We are wasting time. The quicker we get this over with the quicker he can come back to you." Bill says. 

"Ya know he's right." I says smiling. "I'll be here handsome." I say as I stand up on my tippy toes and place a soft kiss on his cheek. 

"No goodbyes okay. Just I'll see you later." He says blushing. 

"I'll see you later Michael." 

"Yes you will. Coming home to you is the best thing in the world." He says placing a kiss on my cheek. "I'll see you later Beautiful." 

"Yes you will." I say. 

With my words floating in the air he walks out the door. I sigh heavily. I miss him already. I head back to my room and take a deep breath. Well I guess I should just get to work. I grab my clothes and change into my pajamas. 

This is going to be a long day. I find my stereo in one of the boxes and hook it up. I press play for my mix tape I made. I've literally made a tape for all types of things I do. I smile hearing The Jacksons Blame it on the Boogie fill my ears. Girl, just get to work and he will be back before you know it. 

================================================================================================================================================================

I've been done for a few hours now. Maybe four I'm not completely sure. It only took me two hours to get everything done and unpacked. Now I'm just sitting on the couch flipping through channels. I'm not sure what I want to watch. All I can think about is Michael and how he hasn't returned yet. He said only an hour but it's been like four. I even cooked dinner for him. I was surprised he even had food in his kitchen. I know he's so busy. He probably don't even have time to cook for himself. I find some old reruns of cartoons and place the remote down on the coffee table. I get comfortable and sigh. I just hope he lost track of time because he's making magic and nothing else. I yawn. I don't really feel tired. Maybe I'm just bored. I lay down on my side on the couch and just watch the TV. Well it watches me because all I can think of is Michael. I miss him so much. But, I know I shouldn't. Everyone leaves and never comes back. Just like he just did today. 

================================================================================================================================================================

"Maya." I hear Michael say. 

I slowly open my eyes and jump. Why is he so close to my face. I didn't even realize I fell asleep. He was crouched down in front of me. Just smiling at him. 

"I swear you look so beautiful sleeping."

"Michael what are you doing? How late is it?"

"I'm sorry things took longer than expected. But, it made me realize something. Something deep in my heart." He says and brushes a loose curl behind my ear. "I need to see every inch of your beautiful face." He says smiling bigger at me. "I've missed you so much Maya." 

"I missed you too Michael. But, what's going on."

"I just have to tell you."

"Tell me what?"

"I think I'm falling in love with you Maya." 

My eyes grow wide. This can't be real. It just can't be. I never get what I want. He comes closer to me til his lips were on mine. I just lay there with my eyes wide. Frozen in time. What do I do?