Chapter 6: I Can't Help It

Before I could even swing again. Bill was pulling me away and him, the other body guards were pushing them out. Michael grabs my hand and guides me back into my room. I just can't believe she would say something foul like that. I pace back and forth with my fingers tangled into my curls. How could she. I just can't stop crying. I wasn't upset with what they said to me. These weren't even angry tears. I was hurt for Michael. How can people judge something he has no control over. I just can't believe it. It's part of him but it isn't part of who he is. I just wish people could see what I see in him. I'm so tired of people and their judgmental ways. I kick my dresser. I kick the bed in rage. I'm so angry with people and I hurt for Michael. I scream out in frustration. I feel Michael wrap his arms around. With one hand firmly on my head and the other holding me securely. 

"Michael." I cry out as I grip his shirt. "I'm so sorry. I wish you never heard what she said."

"Shh." He says as he sways us back and forth. "You have no control over what other people say. Yes it hurts but, I am use to people saying something about my skin. I just want you to be okay."

"I'm sorry you saw that side of me. I couldn't control my anger. I lost it when she said those things."

"It doesn't matter now. I know you just wanted to protect me. But, violence doesn't solve things. It just only gives us temporary satisfaction."

"I know. I thought I let go of all the pain."

"You can't heal over night. It takes time. Never forget I am always going to be right by your side. I will never give up on us."

"Why didn't you listen to me Michael?"

"Because, you were hurting. I knew I needed to be by your side regardless if they saw me or not. You needed me. I could hear the pain in your voice. I know what you said was long overdue. But, I couldn't stand what they said to you. How can family do something so cruel like that. I can't wait for you to be able to put all of this in the past and move on. Because you deserve pure happiness and true love." He says holding me tighter. 

"I have that all in you Michael. Thank you for believing in me."

"We are best friends."

"You are my family now Michael." I say pulling him closer to me. "You are all I need."

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After such a long and eventful day we were finally done with sorting through everything. With the help from his body guards what needs to be donated will go to good will. What I am selling will be sold tomorrow during the yard sale. What I need is packed and ready to go. I can't believe after tomorrow everything is going to change. I mean so much has change already. But this time for the best. No more stress of life. No more of life kicking my ass. Finally something good. 

Michael and I were just sitting on my bed. He was satisfied that he finally was able to shower and change his clothes. Bill had brought him fresh clothes once everything had calmed down. With everything that happened today neither one of us had eaten. I won't take no for answer this boy is eating. The only thing opened at this time is pizza. 

"Hey, Michael." I say. 

"Yeah." He say looking at me from the TV. 

"Do you eat pizza?"

"Depends on what kind?"

"Just cheese. I'm a simple person today." I say. 

"Yeah why do you ask?"

"I'm getting pizza since neither one of us ate today."

"I'm not hungry." He says. 

"You are eating and you are not fighting me on this."

"Fine Maya." 

"Good."

With that being said. I order a large pie so we can all eat. Even his body guards. We both sit there watching cartoons on the TV. We were both laughing too much to even talk to each other. But we both sat close to each other. Just enjoying each other's company. Before we even knew it the pizza was here. Michael and I both had our own slice and left the rest to his body guards. I love how I enjoy his company so much. I feel so comfortable with him. I feel so safe with him. We were both finished with our slices. We washed for bed and once we crawled under the covers we were both asleep. 

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The next morning I awake bright and early before the sun is up. The garage sale isn't til the afternoon. So I want to take Michael on an adventure. I want to take him to my secret spot where I've watched the sun rise so many times. No one knows about this spot. I slowly rise from the bed. The sun doesn't rise for at least 3 more hours. So I want this to be perfect. I also want to make him breakfast. But I still have no food. Maybe one of his guards can go to the store for me. I find my notepad in one of my boxes and a pen. I write down all my ingredients I need. I leave it there and grab my outfit for the day. I already planned out what I was going to wear. I head out the room and straight to the bathroom with my clothes. I brush my teeth first then I turn on the shower. I get undressed and place my dirty clothes in the hamper. I get in washing away all the negativity from yesterday. Today is a new day. Today is the start of new beginnings. I get out and dry my body off. I hang my towel up and get dressed. 

I head out the bathroom and back to my room. To find Michael up now. I smile at him.

"Good morning handsome." I say.

"Good morning. What time is it." He says still half sleep. "Are you going somewhere?" He asks with a hint of sadness. 

"We both are."

"Where?" He asks curiously. 

Now he's awake. 

"It's a surprise mister. Now get up and get ready. We need to hurry." I say giggling. 

I get my breakfast list from my dresser. 

"What's that?" He asks. 

"Just a list of some things I need for when we return." I say smiling bigger. "Now hurry we have an adventure to go on."

He gets up from the bed and stretches. 

"I'll be back. I just need to give this to Bill. You can go to the bathroom and do whatever you need to do."

"Okay." He says. 

I head out the room and find Bill sitting on the couch.

"Hey good morning sir." I say to him. 

"Good morning. You know you don't have to call me sir."

"I know. It's just the way I was raised." I say laughing. 

"You are up early."

"Yeah, I wanna take Michael to my secret spot. It's a little hike. Like ten minutes. I want to show him the sun rise. Will that be okay with you."

"Yeah I just have to tag along with you guys. I want to make sure both of you are safe."

"Okay, but, I will be driving my grandma's car." I say. 

"That's fine less of a distraction." 

"Okay I do need some help with getting a few things." I say. 

"Sure, I can send the driver to get anything you want." 

"Okay. I have a whole list." I say handing it to him. 

"This will be pretty easy to get. It's all in the same place." He says looking at it. 

"Once Michael is ready we will leave."

"Sounds good."

I walk back into my room. I place my sneakers on. I grab my mix tape I made for road trips. I grab the car keys and my jacket. Michael comes back into the room with a smile on his face. 

"Are you happy Michael?" I ask. 

"Very. Because I'm so curious about where we are going. I'm so excited." 

"Finish getting ready and bring a jacket. It's going to be slightly cold where we are going. I'll meet you in the living room."

"Okay." He says smiling. "But wait before you go I need something from you."

"What's up?"

"My hug." He says pulling me close. 

"Mm." I hum as I wrap my arms around him. "Thank you handsome."

"No thank you beautiful." 

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We were now in my grandma's car. Michael sat in the passenger's seat and Bill sat in the back. It's been so long since I used her car. I insert the keys in the ignition and said a little prayer as I turn the key. 

"Yes." I say as it starts. "Thank you girl." I say to the car. 

Michael giggles at me. 

"Now for some tunes for the road." I say inserting the cassette tape into the radio. 

And the first song of course that plays is Michael's Workin' Day And Night. I look to him and stick my tongue. He laughs out loud and lets his head fall back. I put the car in reverse and back out the driver way. 

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It only takes us 30 minutes to get there. I park the car and look at Michael. He looks a little confused and worried. 

"I know you aren't scared Michael. It's just a ten minute walk through a trail. I use to walk this all the time by myself. I know it's a little dark but, I promise I know my way. We won't get lost."

"Never let go of my hand okay."

"You got it handsome." I say before getting out the car.

I place my keys in my pocket and rush to Michael's side. He gets out and closes the door behind him. I take his hand in mine and all three of us walk to my secret location. 

"Maya where are you taking us?" Michael asks. 

"I just want to show you my secret spot. I use to come here when I wanted to escape. You'll love it. I promise you." 

"I believe you." He says smiling at me.

We get there pretty quickly. Just in time to see the sun come up. I've seen it a million times. I know how beautiful it can be. But, watching Michael's face now is more beautiful than anything in the world. The look of pure happiness on his face. How his smile is slowly creeping up on his face. His fingers intertwine with mine. He gives it a little squeeze. I'm so happy at this very moment. Just because he's happy. I never thought someone else's happiness could mean so much to me. It's crazy how much I really like him. I could possible fall in love with him. Especially at this moment. But, I never want to ruin our friendship. I know he doesn't see me that way. Just as a best friend. It's going to be so hard not to fall in love with him. 

"Thank you Maya." He says shaking me out of my thoughts. "This is amazing. Truly amazing" He says looking at me with such a huge smile on his face. "So beautiful." He whispers while staring into my eyes. 

He pulls me close to him and hugs me tight. 

"No matter how many sunrises and sunsets we see together. You will always be the most beautiful thing in the world to me. Like a beautiful work of art. Truly breath taking."

"Michael." I barely say as my eyes grow wide. 

How the hell am I supposed to fight my feelings for him now. When he says things like that and is constantly holding me. He pulls away and places a kiss on my forehead. Sending butterflies straight to my stomach. He pulls away completely and smiles big at me. He takes my hand in his and we walk a little away from Bill seeing the beautiful scenery more. He sits down on a rock just enjoying nature and I can't help how handsome he looks right now. 

He's looking like a true work of art. Breath taking. I swear he's the most handsome man in the world. I love how happy and content he is right now. I'm so glad I've shown him this place. I've never taken anyone here before. Maybe one day we will come back and see this place again. He pats the spot next to me and smiles. 

"Sit with me please." 

I take the spot next to him and smile at him. He pulls me closer to him and wraps his arm around my shoulder. His head sits on top of mine and he sighs deeply. I close my eyes just enjoying being in his arms. I swear this man makes me feel things I've never felt before. He's really stealing my heart right now. 

"Thank you so much Maya. This place is amazing. I really needed this to calm my soul after yesterday. But, how are you doing? How are you really feeling? Are you okay?" 

"I'm so much better all because of you. Thank you so much because if you wasn't here with me I probably would've broke down. Lost all sanity. I would've really been in a dark sunken place. I'm so sorry for them."

"Don't apologize for those people's actions. They are supposed to be your family but, treat you like that. It's such a shame."

"Thank you Michael. I know you are such a busy man but, I was hoping there was a chance. If you can possibly but I can completely understand if you can't. But, is there a possible chance that you could attend my Grandmother's funeral with me. I really need you by myself through it all. I won't be able to handle things without you."

"Of course Maya. Why wouldn't I be by your side. You are going to need me and I will be there. Whatever I have going on can be canceled because you are more important than anything in this world."

"If you already have work to be done I won't interfere with you making money."

He laughs a little. 

"Girl." He practically sings. "You can't fight with me. Everything stops for my best friend."

"Thank you." I say lowly. 

Yeah, Best friend. Thanks for reminding me I will never be good enough to be more. I have to fight these feelings. No falling more for this man. I just have too. I can't like him more than I already do. 

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We were now back at the house and I was just finishing breakfast with the help of Michael. I made a enough for his body guards too. I'm just one of those people. My hospitality is awesome. I always make sure everyone is good. It is now slowly approaching garage sale time. I decided to change into something different. I feel like dressing like how I use too. Michael gives me that confidence to try to be me again. I was always into my fashion. Dressed in the best outfits. Regardless if it was in season or not. If I liked it on me I wore it. I spend too much time in work clothes and pajamas. I change and look at myself in the mirror. 

I can't help but smile. It's so good to look like myself again. Being able to smile again. There's a light knock at the door which brings me out of my thoughts.

"Come in." I say as I look at the door. 

The door slowly opens and Michael walks in. He stops in his tracks in the middle of the door way with his eyes wide open.

"Wow." He says lowly. "You are so beautiful Maya. I swear. So breath taking."

"Thank you Michael. I don't need to remind you that you are always handsome no matter what." 

"Awe Maya." He says blushing.

"You are too adorable when you blush." 

"Stop Maya." He whines so cute.

"Yeah definitely adorable." 

"Maya, please." He says blushing even more. 

"Okay. Okay. You win." I say with my hands up in surrender.

"Everything is ready." He says smiling. "Just waiting for you."

"Thank you. I owe all of you so much."

"As long as you are with me we got you." He says taking my hand in his. "Come on beautiful."

"I'll go anywhere as long as you are there." I say smiling."

"Yeah we'll talk about that another time." He says smiling. 

"Huh." I say confused. 

"Let's go." He says as he pulls me out the room. 

"You really don't have to be out there with me. I don't want to cause anymore stress in your life."

"I know but, I want too. I want to stay by your side at all times. I just hope my disguise is enough."

"Let's just make sure all your curls are tucked in." I say tucking in some run away curls. "And your mustache is straight." I say straightening his mustache.  

"Maya." He whispers as he cups my face. 

My eyes grow wide. Like we were frozen in time. My hands on his fake mustache and his big hands on my face. 

"Michael." I whisper. 

How does he expect me not to fall for him when he looks at me like I am the only girl in the world. His eyes stayed glued to mine and mine to his. My heart in my stomach with all the butterflies. I've never felt these emotions before. How is it possible to care about someone so much like this. How is it possible to need someone so much like I do. I care about this man so much that his happiness means the world to me. That as long as he's happy I'm happy. If he's hurting I am hurting. All I want to do is protect him from all the negativity in the world. All the people who are out there to get him, to spread lies, to hurt him, to take advantage of him. Damn Michael what have you done to my heart. We've only know each other for six months. Is it because we are both broken inside? Is it because we view the world the same? Whatever it is, I'm so happy I met him. Not because he's my favorite singer. That is only a bonus. It's because I really needed someone to bring me back, heal me, save me from myself. Show me something real. Bring me real happiness and true love. Love there's that word again. I've never felt that before. Well not in that way for someone. How can you tell your in love? How do I even know if I am ready for love. How can you tell if the other person loves you back. Is it something you just know? 

"Hey Maya, Michael." Bill says bringing both of us back to reality. "I'm sorry but, there are people starting to show up." He says looking away from us. 

Michael pulls away and I do the same. I look down at the ground and sigh. I feel Michael's big hand intertwine with mine. I look up at him and he smiles. 

"Hey smile beautiful." He says hooking my chin with his fingers. "I am here forever with you Maya Marbles."

What does that mean? How can he say sweet things and expect me to only see him as my best friend. He's not making any of this easy. 

"You promise. Because I'm always going to need you right by my side forever." I say honestly. 

Well damn Maya. Just let this man know you like him so much. 

"Please never stop needing me. Because I'm always going to need you right here. Right by my side. Right in my heart." 

Damn it Michael. 

"I promise." I say holding my pinky out. 

"I promise." He says locking his pinky with mine. 

With that being said we follow Bill outside. I can't believe this is going to be my last night here. This house holds so many memories. Good and bad. I can't believe his bodyguards really set everything up for me. There's a table set up with two chairs and a cash box for us. We take a seat at the table and Michael refuses to let go of my hand. He pulls his chair as close as he can to me. I wonder why he's so quiet. He's just looking around at all the people in the yard. 

"Hey." I softly say. 

He looks at me and smiles. 

"Are you okay?" I ask. 

"Yeah, just so fascinated with everything. So many people have walked up and bought things and have not once realize who I am. It's such an amazing feeling to just be treated normal." He say smiling big. 

"As long as you are with me I got you handsome."

"Maya please." He whines. 

"I'm sorry it's only fair. You constantly remind me of how beautiful I am. I'm going to remind you every chance I get how truly handsome you are. And occasionally how adorable, cute and beautiful you are."

"Girl, stop it." He says laughing.

"Never you are stuck with me forever." I say laughing with him.

"I love that idea." He says smiling so big. 

I'm so glad that this yard sale is going by so smoothly. Almost everything is sold. I see his driver come back with the moving truck. He smiles at the both of us as he walks up to us. 

"Hello boss man and Ms. Maya. I just wanted to let you know everything was delivered to good will. We're now going to pack up everything you are taking to the apartment and set it up for you." He says. 

"Thank you so much. I owe you guys so much."

"You don't owe us anything. Keep up what you are doing to Michael. We love seeing him so happy.

"Please stop it." Michael whines. 

"Awe you are so adorable." I say pinching his cheek. 

"Maya, you are killing me." He says giggling. 

"You'll be okay handsome." I say sticking my tongue out at him. 

"You guys keep enjoying each other's company. We are going to pack up the truck."

We both nod our heads at him and he jogs off. I look straight seeing Monica walking towards us. I scan the yard trying to see if Eddie and Veronica were here too. I don't see them. She reaches me. 

"I can't believe you sold her house." She says once she reaches me. "You just couldn't wait could you." She says with so much hatred in her voice. 

"She told me to sell it." I say. 

Why am I even explaining myself to her. I feel Michael place his arm around my shoulder. Which helps calm my nerves. I smile at him and mouth the words thank you. 

"I see you could wait to sell her things. You act like everything is yours. What gives you the right." She says louder than before. 

"Hello Maya." Someone says behind her. 

I look to see and see that it was my grandma's lawyer. What is he doing here?

"It's been awhile Mark." I say. 

Monica looks at him then at me.

"What are you a prostitute with all these damn men coming in and out of my grandma's house."

"You have no right to call her that. Yeah you are related to her by blood but, don't forget that you disowned her when she first got sick." I say fuming now. 

"Maya." Michael whispers. "Just close your eyes and count to ten please." He whispers in my ear. 

I do as he says and close my eyes. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. I take a deep breath and look at her. I feel better. So much better. Yeah this man was sent here to heal me. 

"Mark why are you here?" I ask. 

"Your grandmother's will." He says. 

"Perfect." Monica says. "Let this thing prove you wrong." She says laughing. 

I roll my eyes at her. 

"Who are you?" Mark asks. 

"Monica Marbles." She says. 

He looks at the folder in his hands. 

"Ah, I see your name with Eddie Marbles and Veronica Marbles. You can deliver the message she left for you three." He says never taking his eyes off the folder. 

"You can do it right here and tell us."

"Maya." He says looking at me for answers. 

"It's fine. My grandma had no secrets." I say. 

"Okay." He says as he looks through the folder. "I, Donna Marbles." He begins reading. "Leave my possessions, home, and money to my one and only granddaughter Maya Nicole Marbles. To do as she pleases with. Eddie, Monica and Veronica I leave my sympathy for you three. Because, you are missing out being family to Maya, an amazing kindhearted woman that always puts other's first. Who would do anything for the people she loves. So during my funeral keep it real. Don't act like you've been there the whole time when you wasn't. Maya, thank for never giving up. Your brother's death wasn't your fault. So please stop blaming yourself. I love you so much. I just want to you to be happy. To fall in love with yourself and to fall in love. To live your best life. To continue writing. To continue singing your heart out to your favorite singer Michael Jackson." He says and flips to the next page. "She did update it three days later. She added someone else to it. Well she left a message for someone. She said she left his last name out to protect his identity." He says looking through the papers. "Michael." He began and my eyes grow wide. "Please take care of my granddaughter. I leave her in your arms and care. Please never give up on her. No matter how stubborn she can be. Love her unconditionally. Never stop making her happy. Always be there for her. Protect her. Help her fall in love with herself again. Help her find herself again. Heal her heart please. Always need her. Show her happiness and true love. Thank you for putting a smile back on her face and a love in her heart. Keep up what you are doing because I will be looking down on the both of you. Thank you Michael. I wish I had a chance too meet you but, everything happens for a reason. I believe you are meant to be here forever with her. So never give up on each other. Maya let down your walls and let him into your heart. I promise you won't regret it. Both of you be happy and continue to make each other happy. I love you so much my sweet Maya." 

Everything gets quiet after that. Monica walks away in anger and defeat. I can't believe she said all of that. Even what she said to Michael. I just can't believe she said that. I can't believe she left that message for Michael. I swear I could bawl like a baby. I look at Michael and his eyes are wide. I touch his face gently and he looks at me. He pulls me into a hug and I hug him back. 

"Maya, I promise your grandmother it's forever with you." 

Damn it Michael. Stop making me fall more for you. 

"Thank you Michael. I promise you forever too." 

"Hey, I'm sorry to interrupt this moment but I just need for you to sign this document. So everything becomes yours."

We pull away but Michael's arm never left my side. 

"Okay." I say. 

He hands me the documents and I sign where he needs me too. 

"Now everything is yours. Also this check." He says handing it to me. 

My eyes grow wide. A check for twenty-five thousand dollars. I didn't know she had all of this money. 

"I honestly didn't think it would be that much."

"It's from her life insurance and for the past ten years she's been putting money aside for you. She said she knows you would do something unselfish with the money."

"I swear the woman knows me too well. Thank you Mark."

"No problem. Your grandmother wasn't just my client she was a good friend. I'm so sorry for her passing. She was truly an amazing woman and an angel."

"Thank you for your kind words."

"I will see you at the funeral."

"Yes, enjoy the rest of your day."

"Goodbye and same to you Maya." 

He nods his head at the both of us before walking off. I just sat there thinking about my grandmother's words. I can't believe she mentioned Michael in her Will. 

"Maya." Michael says bringing me out of my thoughts. "I'm right here for you." He says pulling closer. 

He wipes my fallen tears. I didn't even know I was crying. He kisses the top of my head and I can't help the butterflies in my stomach. This man does things to my heart and mind. He's truly one of a kind and I like him so much. What am I going to do with all these feelings I have for him? I'm screwed because I know he only sees me as a best friend. That's all he is looking for is a friend. But, here I am falling more and more for someone who would never see me that way. I am so helpless. But, I can't help it.