15

Y/N should’ve known something was up the second Felix started cleaning.

Like, deep cleaning.

Not “wipe the counters” cleaning —“Febreze the furniture and light candles” cleaning.

“What’s going on?” she asked, eyeing the vacuum in his hand like it was an alien object.

Felix smirked. “You’ll see.”

An hour later, there was a knock.

Felix opened the door to reveal Chris — tall, responsible, full “substitute dad” energy — and Peter, hoodie-clad with headphones around his neck and a bag of chips in his hand.

“Surprise!” Felix said, way too smug.

Y/N blinked. “Are you kidding me?”

Peter grinned. “He said you were getting into trouble, so I came to witness it.”

Chris crossed his arms. “I came to prevent it.”

Great.

Y/N was halfway to texting Rodrick don’t come, my entire bloodline is here, when Felix said—

“Also… you can invite your little ‘boyfriend.’ I’m not gonna be a jerk.”

Y/N nearly choked on air. “Wait, what?”

Felix shrugged. “If we’re meeting family, might as well meet all of it.”

Cue her texting Rodrick in all caps.

Y/N: EMERGENCY FAMILY DINNER. COME LOOKING CLEAN. DON’T BE A DUMBASS.

Rodrick showed up ten minutes late with flowers.

For Felix.

“I know who I really need to impress.”

Felix rolled his eyes but took them.

Dinner was... tense. Chris asked Rodrick about his GPA (he didn’t know it).Peter asked Rodrick if he liked Star Wars or Star Trek (he said “both,” safe).Felix kept kicking Rodrick under the table when his jokes got too dirty.

Y/N kept her hand in Rodrick’s under the table, clinging on for dear life.

Chris, finally, leaned in and asked:

“So what exactly are your intentions with my sister?”

Rodrick blinked. “Um. To not die tonight?”

Peter snorted. Felix muttered, “Wrong answer.”

The second the dinner was over, the brothers went to the living room to watch a movie.

Y/N grabbed her phone.

Y/N: sneak in 10. window. pants optional.

Ten minutes later, Rodrick was in her room. Shirtless. Smirking.

“Tell me again how terrifying Chris is?”

Y/N grinned. “He once made a guy cry just by introducing himself.”

Rodrick whistled low. “Your family’s wild.”

She kissed him. “You’re just lucky I’m worth it.”

It escalated. Fast.Lips on necks. Hands under shirts.Her giggling quietly as he whispered filth against her skin—

Then: Knock. Knock. Knock.

“Y/N? You left your phone on the—”

Felix swung the door open.

“—table…”

Rodrick froze, halfway under her blanket. Her hand was on his chest.

Chris and Peter were right behind Felix.

A full brotherly audience.

Dead silence.

“...Dude,” Peter said, eyes wide. “Nice.”

“OUT.” Felix yelled. “GET OUT NOW.”

Rodrick bolted like the apartment was on fire, shoes half-on, hoodie backward.

Y/N flopped back into bed, face covered in her pillow. “Kill me.”

Twenty minutes later, she was called to the living room like it was court.

Felix paced like he was giving opening statements in court. Peter sat on the floor eating chips.Chris leaned forward with that parental disappointment face.

“We need to talk.”

“Nope,” Y/N said immediately. “No we do not.”

Chris ignored her. “I know you think you’re grown. But you need to be responsible.”

Peter shrugged. “To be fair, she could be sneaking in worse guys.”

Felix groaned. “Peter—don’t encourage her!”

Chris continued, “You and Rodrick clearly have… chemistry. I just want you to be safe.”

Y/N’s eye twitched. “If you say the word protection, I will physically evaporate.”

Peter raised a chip. “Please do.”

Felix sighed, sitting down finally. “Look. Just… be smart. Don’t do this under our roof. And for the love of God, LOCK. THE. DOOR.”

Fair.

Extremely fair.

Y/N:

I’ve never been more embarrassed in my life

Rodrick:

I was kinda honored ngl. Three bros saw my abs. That’s peak confidence.

Y/N:

shut up before i sneak you in again and actually get you killed

Rodrick:

worth it