Part 15: Just like old times

Loki stood from his throne as he noticed us entering the room, Ake standing below him to his left. Sif walked in front of me and so she was the first person Loki saw, then he saw the warriors three and his face fell, it was only when he saw me tailing them that his jaw dropped open and Ake's face lit up, I heard Loki say something that was just about audible "it can't be"

"Loki, king of Asgard" Fandral began "I present the 1st princess in her line" in my line? What line? Wait... Did they expect me to have children? "Eerika" I bowed my head and as did Loki "I am Fandral, prince of Vanaheim and this is my wife the princess Sif, we have come to keep an eye on Eerika and help to find the lost prince, who is also in line to marry Eerika" Loki seemed almost astounded and I held in a laugh at the look on his face.

Sif stepped forward "I requested that I be the one to fill you in on the Vanir's plans, Eerika could you wait outside please? Perhaps the royal advisor would like a word" I looked over to Ake who was positively beaming at me and I felt warm inside. He remembered me? Better yet he was happy to see me!!

When Sif suggested that I almost lunged at him, I couldn't wait to talk to him "my lady" Ake said trying to be polite, I nodded and accompanied him outside, when the doors were fully closed I pounced on him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders "I thought you had forgotten me"

"Never" he said into my shoulder then he pulled back and eyed me up "and look at you! You're stunning, but did they have to tie you up to get you in pink?"

"Oh god I've missed you" I hugged him again, it was like nothing had changed, he was Ake, my friend, nothing had changed. Then I pulled away and smacked his chest, pushing him back a few steps "why didn't you come looking for me?"

"I'm sorry, Loki told me why he banished you and then I got this job..."

"He told you why he banished me and you didn't kick his teeth in?!" I crossed my arms with frustration, usually in Asgard I fight with Loki, fighting with Ake was something else.

He shushed me and whispered "I couldn't! Loki would have had me killed for that! And I couldn't come looking for you because Loki was watching every move I made, I was never comfortable with what he did to you but I couldn't do anything about it" I shook my head "and after he killed Colby I didn't want to take my chances"

My eyes widened and I gasped, Loki killed Colby? "What?! He did what?!"

Ake shushed me again and then leant closer "a couple of weeks after you left, Colby was talking poorly of you, saying that it was good riddance to you and that you were a little whore anyway, the next day we found him dead in the gardens" I swallowed hard, I couldn't believe it "And then there was a battle in Alfheim and Gustav took one look at the enemy and had a heart attack"

"So everyone is dead? Well except for Endre" I couldn't believe it, half of us were dead, only three of us remained and we had all gone our separate ways, things had changed more than I had anticipated. Ake nodded and I partially understood why he kept his distance. The thought of Loki killing Colby for good sport wasn't hard to picture, but Loki killing Colby because he talked poorly of me was harder to picture.

Strange. That whole thing was very strange. I was about to question Ake some more when Sif came out on her own, she said hello to Ake who bowed his head to her, she turned to me with a sour look on her face "Loki believes that the backup plan with the lost prince won't work, that our only chance at forming an alliance will be through you and him, he wants you as his queen" my jaw dropped a little and my face reddened, Loki made me so angry it's unreal.

I pushed past her through the doors and then shouted for the others to leave me and Loki alone, when they left I slammed the doors shut and turned to him "why dearest, you still have that temper I see, no matter" he eyed up my dress and looked pleased "how long is it before I can tear that off of you?" He was toying with me, all I wanted to do was turn him black and blue with my fists.

"How dare you!" I stormed up to the throne where he was sat.

"Pardon?"

(A/N I'm using some lyrics from Andrew Loyd Webber's love never dies because they really describe what's happening between them, but not all of the following lines are from love never dies and when they are they are taken from the song 'beneath a moonless sky')

"How dare you try and claim me now!" The whole 'the lost prince will fail' thing is due to jealousy, he sent me away and now he wants this? "You are on another level! You banish me and now you're persuading Sif that you're the only one I can marry! You're on a whole other level of deranged Loki!"

"Claim you? Oh Eerica, my Eerica, so naive, the idea that you could marry someone else is merely a front so you wouldn't back down on the idea of marriage, the lost prince is a shamble and could never work in forming an alliance, you were set to marry me since they suggested it, this backup plan was never on the table" so the queen played me? Told me that Loki wasn't the only choice just so I would agree to it? I knew the plan was faulty but this was something else "how very gullible of you"

"Why would you banish me, and then want to marry me? Surely you would turn the request down and forget I ever existed..."

His eyes widened and he stood up tall in front of me, as an intimidation technique, which at that point was working "you think I forgot you? After that night how could I? And don't you deny what we did, on that long ago night"

I stepped backwards a bit and then swallowed "don't I deny it? Are you serious? You denied it when you banished me!"

He sat down slowly "I regret that now"

"How convenient" I scoffed, he would say anything to try and win me over.

"We said things in the dark, things you can't take back" he stood again.

Tears flooded my eyes and I pushed him just as I had done with Ake before, I hit with a greater force though, my hair flying around and covering my face "you took them back! You rejected me and I hate you!" he looked slightly taken aback but changed when I broke down in front of him, I held my head in my hands and pushed my hair away. His hands touched my shoulders but I pushed him away again "dont touch me!" I screamed but it wasn't me shouting, I just felt so angry and it felt like a new skin I couldn't shake off.

Loki whispered my name and tried again, but this time when I pushed him there was something surging through my body and onto him, slamming him down from the throne level and into one of the columns. I stared at my hands which were shaking uncontrollably, I let out several loud sobs and then collapsed to the floor, what had I done.

I was so deep in fear of myself that I hadn't seen Loki get up slowly and wrap his arms around me, cradling me in his arms as he shushed me and stroked my hair, I leant into him and cried into his chest. All we ever did was fight and cry, but this was a different cry, this wasn't a cry of aggravation, this was a cry of fear, I was afraid of what I had done, whatever I had done I didn't mean to do it.

Loki placed his hand on my cheek and began to rock me "shhhh" he said as I noticed a green glow emanating from his hand, then the room started to fade and I couldn't stop it, the room just went black, what had Loki done to me?

I woke up in a large bed, at first I wondered if it had all been a dream but then I saw Ake towering over me, his face a classic example of concerned, but then I saw a second face, holding the same look as the other, it was Loki. When I finally came to I remembered everything, Loki turned to Ake "perhaps you should leave us"

Ake scoffed "with all due respect sir, the last time you two were alone this happened"

Loki's expression hardened and as soon as Ake caught sight of it he bowed his head and left, I didn't want him to leave, I didn't want to be alone with Loki "what did you do to me?" I had a strange recollection of a green light, similar to the glow when Loki made the daggers appear.

"A simple sleeping spell, to calm you, you were... Hysterical" I remembered crying, falling to my knees and staring at my hands, I remembered Loki, I remembered him cradling me and shushing me. In that moment I forgot why I hated him, even though in the fight it was about me hating him. The fight was the thing I remembered most, it was as clear as the sky.

"What happened? My hands... I want Ake!" I began to panic, sitting up quickly and going to climb out of bed, I didn't recognise these chambers, it wasn't my old chambers, it wan't Loki's chambers, but I didn't want to stay and find out, I wanted to get out of there.

He placed his hands on my shoulders and I couldn't overcome his strength, he wasn't even applying that much pressure "he wont understand, he can't tell you what you want to know"

I stopped struggling and calmed down "understand what?"

He inhaled deeply and sat down on a chair beside the bed "do you know what you did? Do you have any clue how you did it?"

Did I? I thought hard about what happened "no. Whatever it was I didn't ask for it to happen" there was a look of disbelief on his face "ok maybe I did, I admit I wanted to hurt you but not like that. I don't even know what it was I did"

"Power"

Power? I had powers? "I... Don't understand, I don't possess magic"

He shrugged his shoulders and seemed to ponder the thought "perhaps the Vanir gave you powers but you didn't know, or perhaps you've simply aways had them"

"No, my father he was Vanir, so are you saying that I could have had these powers all my life but never have known it?" I understand why Loki sent Ake away, there was no way he could have explained anything to me, but Loki, he is a master of magic and would be most eligible to tell me or even teach me everything I needed to know. His expression didn't change "wait... Did you know? About my father" his expression didn't change still "why didn't you tell me?!"

"I assumed you knew" he spoke plainly and I believed him.

"If there's one thing I've learnt in my life it's to assume nothing, you assume that every night the moon will be there for your inspiration, you assume that light will follow dark and dark will follow light, we begin to take it for granted, let this be a constant reminder for the future, assume nothing"

Loki seemed to sigh "why can't we always talk like this? Why must we always argue?"

"Because it's all we know to do, and you keep stuffing up" I smiled lightly.

He scoffed humorously "now now, not all of the arguments are because of my faults... Eerika you've hated me for years, let me show you, you don't have to anymore, let me help you"

I smiled softly, the idea warming my heart "Loki what's happening to me? What am I? Am I cursed?"

His expression turned visibly saddened and I wondered why "I asked Odin the very same once, funny how things have a way of coming back to you"

"You were confused about yourself?"

"I recently discovered a... Monster inside of me, I didn't even know it was there, I was... I admit I was scared, even more so when Odin wouldn't tell me" I wasn't going to ask what he had discovered about himself, but I never knew, I never knew that Loki was me once, well in a manner of speaking, he had the same fears I then possessed, but what if his discovery was what turned him into a psychopath that kills hundreds of people in a matter of days. I feared for myself again, what if I was going to become him, what if my heart was to turn as black as his hair, could I live with that?