⫣3⫦- What It's Like To Be Bad

I don't confront Taehyung about his lie, and he makes no move to talk to me again either. So for a whole week, I just get to know my other classmates, spend some time with Momo and get used to the new environments.

My mind however, keeps going back to that first encounter, replaying it like it's on a loop and my attention in class strays too often to the back of the classroom.

The teachers don't seem to even take notice of Jungkook and Taehyung as they continuously show up late, play on their phones or sleep during class. Not even Momo can tell me why the teachers don't bother.

"Guess they just see them as lost causes anyway", she simply replies, but the thought doesn't sit well with me. It bugs me. Itches.

But even when I try to forget about them, I catch myself analysing them. Trying to figure them out. The two of them are always together, but I never see them during breaks.

"Oh, they usually meet up with Jimin in the alley where the school buildings meet and smoke or something. And, you know, just doing bad guy stuff I guess," Momo told me when I finally had the guts to ask.

I try my best not to think about them and concentrate on school, but it seems I am even thinking of them when they were not around.

I don't know what it is- probably a mixture of curiosity and immeasurable stupidity, but the next day when I see Jungkook and Taehyung walk out the classroom during break, I follow them.

I go unnoticed in the mass of students milling around the halls, all dressed in the same uniforms, but thanks to their height, I can still make them out in the crowd.

I make sure I drop back a bit when they walk down a not so commonly used corridor, the amount of student's diminishing. I wonder what the hell I'm thinking and why I am doing this. It follows no logical sense!And just as I decide this is beyond insane, I see them turn to the right and disappear into another hallway.

I really do blame it all on my stupid curiosity which overrides my logical brain.

I follow them and quickly realize that this is the way to the library. I frowned, even as I keep following on silent feet. I can no longer see them since I have to stay back, the halls almost empty.

But I know this is one way.

No one but the most diligent students went to the library during break time, so it's almost completely empty when I reach the door to it and step in.

I look around, breathing in the smell of old, leathery books, pretending to search for something specific while craning my head to all sides. No... not suspicious at all. But all I can see are some people quietly reading or listening to music with ear pods- just trying to get some peace and quiet.

Even at the far end of the large library, there is nothing but books starting to get dusty. I like reading. Especially those heroin books, though I keep those hidden from my mother. She calls them 'trashy'. I sigh as I reach a dead end, two lines of high stacked shelves of books surrounding me to either side and a large wall to the front.

My shoulders slouch. I must have seen wrong- why would Taehyung and Jungkook go to the library of all places?

I turn, already cursing my stupid idea, when I let out a squeak of surprise.

Nearly as broad as the row itself, stands Taehyung, smiling at me with a winning grin. The dim light of the library throws shadows in his face, making him appear intimidating and dark.He is alone, no sign of Jungkook as he stares at me, his one shoulder leaning carelessly against a bookshelf.

"You know, it's considered 'bad' to follow someone."He smirks, even as he put 'bad' in air quotes.

I open my mouth to deny it, but quickly snap it shut again. There is little I can say to defend myself. I'll only look more stupid.

"You lied to me!", I accuse him instead.

He chuckles darkly and his tousled black hair bounces on his forehead. Then he smirks up from under his eyes and lazily starts walking towards me.

I back up, but quickly realize the depth of my own idiocy. I literally followed the most dangerous boy in school and then ended up in a dark, far away corner with said boy. And there is no one to blame but myself! I connect with the wall and then can do nothing more than watch him step closer.Running will do me no good. He's blocking the exit with his body. No way I can get past him.

My heartbeat speeds up and my palms become sweaty and I'm not even sure why. Surely he won't hurt me! We're in school!

And as of now, he's not actually made any indication that hurting me is his goal.

He stops just a breath away and raises his right arm to the wall, making me feel trapped even more.His cologne enters my nose, disrupting my thoughts- making me forget that I am supposed to be terrified.

I try not to think about how close his lips are, or how he smells- musky, spicy, and just a trace of smoke. I feel the warmth radiating from him, making me feel hot, the hair on my skin rising.

"You look a bit nervous, Lian," he tells me in a deep voice and that darn smirk on his lips.

"It's just-- you... shouldn't come so close."

I feel stupid for stammering, but my voice just won't work- or my thoughts.

"And why not? You were the one who followed me here after all. Why? Were you curious?"

I know he is playing me- I know it by the humour tracing his voice, but that doesn't change my body reacting to his seductive tone.

"I don't know. Maybe."

Damn! Why did I just admit that?

Taehyung smiles like he just won a trophy, and I get the sudden urge to hit him- and not as a last resort in defence. I'm not a violent person- at least I don't think I am. And I'm supposed to be smart, but I guess this proves that I'm not.

"I know why you did it. The question is: do you know why you did it?"

I don't say anything. I just try my best to stay still and pray to God no one will come by and misjudge the situation- because that may land me in trouble.

And that's the one thing I always try to avoid.Except today apparently, seeing that I literally followed the trouble...

"You are curious what it's like, and you followed us to find out."

"Find out what?"

He smiles like I just landed in the trap he laid, nothing but a mouse stupidity following the cheese. He bends down even closer, his breath like a teasing stroke on my face- his lips too close to properly concentrate on the words forming there.

"What it's like to have fun!"

Something dark glitters in his eyes. Something that has me stunned at the feeling it evokes in my chest. This itch that I can never scratch... And then he draws back. I feel my body mimic his, and I almost stumble after him, suddenly feeling cold and empty. But finally having some space again seems to allowed my brain function to return.To understand he was having fun teasing me again. Playing with me. Anger rises in me.

"You're wrong. You don't know the first thing about me. I do know fun! You're nothing but trouble."

He lets out a quiet rumble of laughter.

"And aren't those things the same? Let me guess, you never do anything forbidden? You don't drink, don't smoke, do your homework as soon as you get home and never turn up late?"

I wish I could deny it, but it's the truth- I just never felt like it was something to be ashamed of. But for some reason I don't like the way he said it.

"I bet your idea of fun is telling jokes during dinner and watching a comedy with your platonic friends. But that's not real fun."

"Then what is? Getting drunk on parties and staying up all night?"

It was intended to sound like an insult, but I can't help but feel like I'm honestly asking. Taehyung only puts his hands in his pockets, leans against the bookcase again and nods. So smugly confident, I hate it, my teeth gritting together.

"Among other things. But you are way too good to consider doing that, aren't you Lian? At least that's what you keep telling yourself."

A shudder runs down my spine at the way he says my name, and I can't shake it. I decide it's definitely time for a topic change.

"You still haven't told me what you were doing at my house. I know you never lived there, so there was no stuff for you to get."

He looks down at me unbothered and only shrugs his shoulder, the blows a bubble with his gum, which he let's pop. Obviously not caring that you're supposed to be quiet in a library.

"I did have to get some stuff. I might have used that hut to stash some of my weed and didn't think anyone would mind- you know, with it being uninhabited.I honestly didn't know you guys moved in before it was too late. Good thing I got it too, don't you think? Or your daddy might have thought his well-behaved girl is up to not good when he found it. And we wouldn't want that, would we?After all; you're his good, little girl, right?"

Okay, enough is enough!

There is no reason for me to listen to his arrogant rumble. I push off the wall and intend to just leave him there, but before I can pass him, he jumps into action.

In the blink of an eye I am pushed against the bookshelf, my hands trapped on either side and I'm looking at Taehyung's face- so close to mine. Too close.

For a moment I try to wriggle my hands free, but he is simply too strong, so I give up, settling for an angry glare as I position my knee closer to the middle.

But before I can move, he leans forward. My knees go weak and for a second I am sure he is about to kiss me. My stomach makes weird loops that I try to ignore, but fail. But instead, his mouth comes up to me ear, his hot breath tickling my neck, making me shiver.

His voice is so low and quiet, I wouldn't be able to hear it if he wasn't whispering directly into my ear.

"You want to know what real fun is like, I know it. I can tell by the way you're watching us. You can pretend to be the good girl all you want, but deep inside, there is a part of you that hates doing all those right, decent things. I am pretty sure you think about me all day. Perhaps... even at night? Ah, but I do know one thing: You want to know what it's like to be bad!"

I can't help the tremble that overtakes my body at his words.

He draws away and his eyes dip from my eyes to my mouth. A hungry, almost desperate look crosses his feature, before he regains himself and gives me one of those lopsided smiles which are full of mischief.

"And I'm going to be the one to show it to you."

And then, just like the night we met, he simply turns around and leaves me without looking back. The silence of the library is suddenly like a pressure weighing down on my body, the only sound my own thundering heartbeat.

"What the fuck?", I whisper to myself in the quiet, swearing loudly, probably for the first time in my life, also not giving a shit that we're in a library.

__________________________