9. Not love

CARA

When Kendall left, it felt so lonely. So I decided to call Mike.

"Hey Caz," he greeted, as always.

"Hey Mike, doing anything?"

"Nope."

"Wanna hang out?" 

"Sure. See ya about ten minutes."

And with that, he was almost here. Mike was my best friend, and he had been that since I can remember. We used to do all these crazy things when we were in High School. It was one of the best times in my life. 

When he came, we took his car and drove somewhere. That was what we usually did. We just drove. We never went anywhere, we where always going somewhere. We never stopped, we just drove while we listened to music. Slow Motion with Trey Songz was pumping loudly, and the bass made us almost deaf. 

My thoughts immediately wandered to Kendall. I thought about how I wanted to dance in slow motion with her. Or, we would dance normal, but for me, everything with her is playing in slow motion. I wonder if it is the same thing for her.

"Hey Caz, you alright?" Mike asked.

"Yeah, yeah I was just daydreaming as usual," I explained. Mike knew that I was daydreaming a lot.

"So what has happened lately for you then?" he asked casually.

"You remember that day when I told you I had to be socializing with a girl?"

"Yes."

"I've been with her these latest days."

I better tell him like everything. I needed someone to know.

"And I can't stop thinking about her." I confessed.

He looked at me carefully, still kind of looking at the road while he drove.

"You can't stop thinking about her? How come?"

"I don't know," I said. "She's just always on my mind. I can't help it."

"Do you think about her because you don't like her or that you like her?"

"I don't know!" I exclaimed. "At first, I thought that she was annoying, but now I just want to be with her every single second. Is something wrong with me?"

"Cara, I think you're in love," he said serious over the loud music.

"Shut up! It's not the time to be joking around Mike, I'm serious!" 

"And so am I!"

I looked at him confused.

"In love with her? How can I be in love with a girl?" 

"How can you not be in love with a girl?" 

I thought about it, and I soo denied it.

"I'm not in love with her!"

"Then you're having a crush on her," he simply said.

"Stop with the love thing! I don't love her! She doesn't have anything with love to do! She has a boyfriend."

"Too bad for you."

"Stop Mike!" But I couldn't help but laugh.

"I'm sorry Cara. I don't know what I can do for you."

"Yeah, it's pretty frustrating." I said. "But I can at least be nice to her."

He gave me an applaud and I just rolled my eyes.

"Way to go Cara!" he laughed.

That was mostly what I did all night. I had a great time with Mike, and it felt good to do something else than just smoking and thinking about Kendall. I felt free. But my mind was still on Kendall, and it disturbed me. Why am I thinking of Kendall when I am having a great time with Mike?

The night stopped too soon, and Mike had to go home. I was standing alone outside on my smoking spot, when I heard the music. The music from the club I met Kendall in. I heard what they were playing, and I was so tempted to go inside. So I did.

They played Light It Up with Major Lazer. And when the beat dropped, I can tell you, so did everything else too. Everyone were jumping with their fist in the air, including me.

I met a friend at the bar, who was really really drunk. I sat there, also pretty drunk, and tried to have a conversation with her. But that was failing pretty miserable. But I was happy to see that person anyway, because it had gone a while since I last saw her. 

We ended up dancing again. And then, I walked home. I was pretty drunk as I said, but I could take myself home.

At home, I just ran to the couch and jumped on it so  landed on my stomach. And then I fell asleep.

The next day, I woke up on the floor. And not to mention, with a really painful hangover. I wasn't that drunk yesterday, but right now, I just couldn't handle anything. I just wanted to get up, eat breakfast and be with Kendall. No, I wanted to get up and eat breakfast with Kendall. 

But right now, I felt like shit. But I guess I could survive it if Kendall was with me. Fuck I hate that she has a boyfriend that doesn't even care that much.

"Are you really saying that you are jealous Cara Delevingne?" I asked myself.

"No, I just said that I hate that her boyfriend doesn't care so much about her." I explained.

"Haha you're awful at lying to yourself Cara." I chuckled.

Ow. Don't laugh. My head is killing me.

I grabbed my phone and texted Kendall immediately. It was 11 am, so she was probably awake.

To: Kendall

'Free today?'

And after some painful minutes, I got answer.

From: Kendall

'I have to be with my boyfriend today, but we can still text!'

To: Kendall

'Okay... Want to play a game?'

From: Kendall

'Sure:)'

To: Kendall

'Okay, I'm saying a lyric from a song, and you answer with a lyric from a song. Get it?'

From: Kendall

'Yeah!'

To: Kendall

'Okay: Today I don't feel like doing anything, I just wanna lay in my bed'

And a minute later...

From: Kendall

'Carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters' 

I was a bit surprised she had heard Bohemian Rhapsody...

To: Kendall

'(That was pretty genius Kendall) When you broke down I didn't leave ya, I was by your side, so where are you now that I need ya?'

Hehe, I wanted her to be with me today, not her boyfriend...

From: Kendall

'Yeah I know that I let you down, is it too late to say I'm sorry now?' 

To: Kendall

'Don't you worry, don't you worry now. Yeah! There was a time, I met a girl of a different kind. We ruled the world, I thought I'd never lose her out of sight. We were so young, I think of her now and then.' 

From: Kendall

'What do you mean? lol'

To: Kendall

'When I am with you, there's no place I'd rather be'

Okay I think that is enough. 

From: Kendall

'I don't know what I can answer on that :D Game over for me.'

To: Kendall

'Haha I won! What are you doing tomorrow?'

From: Kendall

'Nothing I think'

To: Kendall

'Yes you are, cuz you are gonna be with me.'

From: Kendall

'Haha okay, mom. I'll come over when I wake up, kay?'

To: Kendall

'Yas, see you tomorrow.'

And then I could live the rest of the day too. I had to survive this day to be with her tomorrow. I have to. So I just watched TV until it was time to sleep. I was so excited for tomorrow, I almost didn't fall sleep. But luckily I did. And soon, it was the next day.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------