Chapter 2

T.W

This chapter contains abuse, alcohol and drugs.

 Clarissa's POV

We were sitting on the sofas, enjoying an iced butterbeer by the time the boys entered the common room. Mattheo was at the front of them, blood splattered over his clothes and marring his face.

"What happened to you?" Darcy asked, her nose scrunching up in disgust.

Ignoring her, he shot me a look of pure irritation and carried on towards his dorm. I looked at the other guys questionably as they sat around us.

"What did I do?"

None of them answered me but each had a small smirk playing on their lips. Draco glanced at Darcy, a silent twin telepathy conversation happening between them. She then looked over to me, then to the door Mattheo had just left through, then back to Draco who nodded. Her eyes widened while a grin formed on her lips.

"Well shit." She breathed out.

"Yeah." Blaise said, wide eyed too and nodding his head.

"Can someone explain to me what's just happened?" I asked, feeling a bit put out.

"Mattheo just killed that man who touched your arse." Draco looked at me pulling out a cigarette and lighting it up.

"He just killed someone?" My voice was an octave higher than it normally was.

"Yeah but we're not shocked about that." Reid said, shrugging at my astonishment. "It's Mattheo, that's what he does."

"What we are shocked about is that fact he killed someone because of someone else. He doesn't tend to do that. Not saying he's a shit mate because I don't fancy getting killed now and there are ears everywhere," Blaise glanced around the room, lowering his voice. "But Mattheo doesn't defend anyone. He will let us sort out our own shit. You..." Leaning forward he gave me a dirty smirk. "Well for some reason, he felt the need to defend your honour."

I sucked in my bottom lip, rolling it between my teeth. What should I do? Thank him? Ask him why he did it? It felt rude to ignore it had happened at all. But still, he had killed a man. Why didn't that bother me as much as him actually doing it for me did?

Standing up I walked towards the door that Mattheo disappeared behind.

"Where are you going?" Pansy asked, moving herself to sit beside Draco.

"I'm going to speak to him." I carried on walking towards the door, my stomach swirling with every step.

"When you go through, go to the door on the right. Mattheo has his own room." I heard Reid call.

Of course he did, I rolled my eyes to myself, no less for Voldemort's son.

"Good luck!" One of the girls shouted out but I was too lost in unease to know who. This was either going to go really bad for me or it was going to be a quick thank you and then never speak of it again.

The little corridor was dark and there were only two doors. I walked up to the one on the right and knocked lightly. There was no answer so I knocked again a little harder and it opened. Stepping in, I looked around. The room was surprisingly big with large black tiles on all four walls. In the centre of the rear wall there was a large bed that looked bigger than the standard king size. The green silk sheets looked pristine and unslept in.

On the right side there was an open fireplace that was already alight. The only other source of light was a dim ring of it surrounding the door to the left side of the room. I took a couple of slower steps into the room. The door slammed shut behind me causing me to spin around, my heart thumping against my ribs.

"What do you want, Blackwood?" Mattheo's voice rumbled behind me.

I whipped around to see him standing near the now open door on the other side of the room. He was topless with his grey sweatpants hanging low on his hips. Droplets of water dripped from his hair on to his toned abs. The blood that had made him appear to be a beautiful nightmare had been washed away.

He roughly dried his hair with a towel before flinging it over the chair, still staring at me, waiting for an answer.

"I... I just wanted to see if you was ok?" I stuttered embarrassingly.

That was the reason I was there right? I mean, what other reason could it be? But even with the innocent reason, my heart was still pounding rapidly.

Mattheo walked towards me and I took a small step back but my legs felt weak. This man was dangerous. He had proved that. Yet I still chose to come here on my own. I was crazy, there was no doubt about that. But I wasn't as crazy as the psycho in front of me.

The light from the fire bounced off the water droplets on his torso, making them glisten and drawing my eyes to where I shouldn't have been looking. Quickly, I looked back up to his face hoping he hadn't noticed.

"And why wouldn't I be ok?" He smirked. Yeah, he noticed.

"You just killed a man Mattheo." I whispered, looking down at my feet to avoid getting distracted again.

"I've killed many." I didn't dare look up but I knew there was a grin that went with the statement.

My brows creased together. "Do you not feel bad at all?"

"There is something that you will come to realise eventually, I feel nothing." I could feel the heat from his body next to mine and his breath on my neck as he growled deeply into my ear. My stomach flipped again as I looked up in to his brown eyes. "Now get out."

"Mattheo, you-"

His fingers curled around my neck quicker than I could have stopped him and he pushed me hard against the door. The coldness of the tiles bit into my skin through my clothes, sending a shiver through to my core. I tried to breathe but his fingers dug in tighter, making it almost impossible.

"I said. get. Out." He snarled, his eyes darkening into something sinister.

Fear washed over me. A fear like I had never felt before. I knew he could see the terror in my eyes but I didn't even try to hide it. I couldn't.

I reached down trying to find the handle of the door beside me and when I did, I pushed it down to open it. Mattheo loosened his grip around my neck and I quickly slipped out slamming the door behind me. Leaning against it I let out a breath of relief.

The first tear fell down my cheek and I swiped it away. What the hell had I got myself into. My fingers lightly touched my neck as I tried to arrange all the thoughts that were scrambled in my head. Mattheo had just killed a man, washed off his blood like it was nothing and I went in to his room on my own for what? To say thank you? I didn't even say it. Instead, I nearly ended up the same as that man. The psycho was confusing. One minute he is killing a man for me, the next he is trying to kill me.

I pushed myself off the door and headed back to my dorm, wiping the still falling tears away with my sleeve. One thing was for sure, he wasn't ruining my night.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

The girls and I were finally ready. Darcy looked stunning with her blonde her pulled back into a high ponytail and her pink silk dress clinging to her curves. She finished the look off with white gold jewellery and silver heels. Pansy had straightened her black hair so it hung halfway down her back. She chose black heels and accessories so nothing would distract from the green silk dress. They both looked beautiful.

I had put my black skater style dress on and added some red heels to match the red lipstick I had applied. My hair was in loose waves down my back with half of it loosely tied back by a thin black ribbon.

We walked down the stairs of our dorm, into the common room where the party was being held. Loud music was already playing and there were already loads of students from the other three houses dancing and mingling with each other. The boys were sitting in our usual spot, not allowing any one else to sit in the empty seats that were meant for us girls.

Mattheo's eyes were already on me. I could feel his stare setting of something inside of me. Irritation maybe? His expression was hard to read at first but then he cocked his head to the side, baiting me to say something. I gave him a disgruntled look and he smirked as he looked away finally. Rolling my eyes, I made my way over to them following Darcy and Pansy.

Pansy sat down beside Draco and Darcy sat on the arm of the chair beside Blaise. I was about to sit on the empty chair but Reid patted the seat beside him. Shrugging, I plonked myself down.

"How the fuck can you look so fine yet so sweet and innocent at the same time?" He asked, making Darcy chuckle and Blaise mutter something along the lines of "Here we go."

"Just skills I guess." I joked, acting cocky and flicking my hair behind me.

Reid laughed lightly, moving himself closer while I received a death glare from Mattheo. But his problem wasn't going to be my problem tonight.

Reid handed me the bottle of alcohol he had smuggled in. Taking a big swig, I screwed up my nose as I swallowed. The amber liquid burned the back of my throat but that didn't stop it from going down easily. It was definitely welcomed after the day I had had. Fire whisky was fast becoming my favourite drink.

After a few more drinks more people began joining us, including Hermione and her two friends. Mattheo had finished gracing me with his death glare and just to turn his attention to that dark-haired boy with glasses. Still couldn't place where I had seen him before. I held in my laughter when they tried staring each other out, neither backing down. Mattheo looked straight up scary but the other boy looked like a puppy trying to be a wolf. Men really could be pathetic.

"I think someone is getting pretty drunk." Pansy laughed catching me laughing. Damn alcohol making me think my laughter was in my head.

"Then that means it must be time for the best party game ever." Darcy announced, placing an empty fire whisky bottle on the table. "Spin the bottle."

The boys groaned but soon leaned forward to join in. The rules were simple, if the bottle landed on you, you receive a dare. If you don't do the first dare you get dared to do something much worse. There was truth in this game.

Darcy spun the bottle first and it landed on Pansy. "I dare you to kiss my brother." She grinned getting straight to the point.

I glanced at Pansy smiling, knowing that she liked Draco and it was obvious that Darcy knew all along too. She got up out of her seat, straddled him as he held on to her hips and kissed him. Reid wolf whistled and Blaise suddenly became a fog horn, whooping his fist in the air.

When she finally pulled away, Draco pulled her back in for another, making everyone cheer with laughter. Pansy pushed herself away, flushed in the cheeks and returned to her seat. Catching her eye, I gave her a wink and she chuckled.

The bottle was spun again and stopped at me.

"Clary, I dare you to use your best pick up line on someone in this room." Pansy smirked side glancing towards Mattheo who was staring at me once again intently.

I stared back at him and opened my mouth to speak. He leant forward, resting his arms on his knees. There was a silence that was full of anticipation. There was no doubt that they expected me to do this dare on Mattheo with this weird power battle we were in.

"Carrow." I smiled sweetly, taking my gaze of Mattheo and turning my head towards Reid. "What's your first name?"

"Oh, come on sweetheart, you know what my name is." He smiled back.

"I just want to make sure I'm screaming the right name later."

The whole room erupted with cheers and laughter. Blaise spat out his mouth full of fire whisky, spraying Darcy and that made her swat at him making him laugh more.

Reid threw his arm over my shoulder and drew me closer to him. "You're not that innocent at all are you?" He laughed.

"More innocent than you think." I laughed too but pushed myself away from him. His arm draped over back of sofa instead and softly played with one of my curls.

Without being to help myself, I took a peek at Mattheo and met his eyes, receiving his signature death glare. Quickly looking away I made a promise to not even chance looking at him again. It was ridiculous how penetrating one look from him was and I refused to let him see that I was giving him an ounce of my attention.

The next few rounds were pretty funny. A random Hufflepuff had to swap her clothes with a boy from Gryffindor. Darcy couldn't touch the floor at all so had to climb over everyone to move about. It wasn't that hard to start with until she needed to use the toilet and had to convince Blaise to carry her. After a couple of hours all the other houses had left and it was only our little group left but they weren't ready to give up the game yet.

The bottle landed on me again and I groaned when I saw Darcy look at Pansy with a mischievous smirk.

"I dare you to kiss Mattheo." She grinned at me.

I looked at Mattheo who looked back at me with the disgust I felt. Oh, hell no. "What's the forfeit?"

"Down the rest of this." Blaise thrust a bottle of fire whisky in to my hand.

There was little over half left but was I fuck kissing him right now after what he did earlier. I brought the bottle to my lips and tipped it up. The liquid burned my throat once again but I kept going until every last drop was gone praying that I didn't gag.

I slammed the bottle on the table in front of me and Darcy and Pansy cheered.

"Damn sweetheart, you just continue to impress me." Reid whispered in my ear and I laughed as I edged away from him again.

"Carrow, get the blunts out." I looked over to see Mattheo glowering at us although his expression was still hard to read. He looked pissed off but that was also his usual look. But with the tone he had used when speaking to his so called friend, he didn't seem too impressed with our little exchange.

I felt Reid fumble in his pockets beside me and then passed a pre rolled joint over to Mattheo. He kept one back for himself, lighting it up. The room filled with the smell of weed. After taking a couple of puffs, Reid offered me some but I shook my head and he passed it over to Pansy.

"Have you never smoked before?" Draco asked, curious.

"I've tried a normal cigarette before."

A slyness filled his eyes. "But you haven't tried a spliff?"

I shook my head, all of a sudden feeling a little awkward.

"Do you want to try it?" Mattheo spoke, leaning forward with the joint in his hand.

If it wasn't for the alcohol I wouldn't have nodded, but fuck, with the amount swimming through my veins I probably would have done anything they asked. He gave me a devilish grin and stood up. His dark eyes shone with trouble like he was excited at the thought of corrupting something.

He avoided walking around the table and just stepped on it then back down so he was now in front of me. I felt Reid's arm move away from behind me as he backed away but I couldn't take my eyes Mattheo.

He leaned down, resting his hands on the back of the sofa, either side of my head so I was blocked in. his face was inches from mine and I watched as his big brown eyes glanced down to my lips then back up.

"You sure you want to do this?" He said quietly and I nodded again softly. I mean how hard could it be? It would be like smoking a normal cigarette. Not that I was an expert of that but as long as I didn't choke I wouldn't make too much of a fool of myself.

He smirked, placing the joint between his lips and inhaling deeply. With the same hand he lifted my chin and gently opened my mouth slightly by running his thumb down my bottom lip. His lips softly touched mine and I felt him blow the smoke out in to my mouth. My eyes closed as he pushed his lips harder against my own, making sure I didn't blow the smoke out straight away. My head started to feel light as I breathed in the smoke. My pulse thumped against my ear drum while my heart raced. I had a feeling it wasn't the effects of the weed.

When I opened my eyes he took his hand away from my chin. His face was still inches away but there was no sign of emotion on him at all. Not that I could see anyway.

"How did that feel?" He whispered. I didn't know if he was talking about how I felt having his lips on mine or the massive hit of weed I just inhaled.

"Ok." I breathed out. He grinned and pushed himself back up.

"Wow, that was intense." Blaise blurted out and I felt my cheeks burn as I looked down at my hands resting on my lap. Mattheo returned to his seat, passing the joint to Darcy on the way. She was watching at me, smiling softly.

I stood up and swayed a little but managed to catch my balance. This was either the alcohol or the joint. I'd never smoked it before. How was I to know what kind of effect it would have on me.

"I'm going for a walk." Everything was getting too stuffy and I needed to get some fresh air.

"Want me to come with you?" Reid stood up to catch me as I lost my balance and nearly fell back down.

"No." I pushed his hand away and walked towards the entrance to the common room. Their voices followed me but couldn't focus on what they were saying.

I walked around the castle, lost in my own thoughts. Overthinking what had just happened. It was only my second night at Hogwarts and I was already drinking way too much than what I had ever drank before. Not to mention that I had just done drugs for the first time too. But it was only weed. That wasn't too bad. There was worse I could have done.

But in all honesty, I wasn't really that bothered about that little issue. It wasn't like my parents were around to scold me. No, my concerns were mainly about Mattheo, how one minute he could be such an ass and the next a completely different person. And why the hell did I wish that what had just happened was a real kiss? After how he had treated me that was probably a fucked up thought to have. What was even more fucked up was thinking about his fingers wrapped around my neck again and that I wanted it.

Merlin, I was going to hell.

Not long later, I found myself in the astronomy tower, the highest point of Hogwarts. It was chilly but I didn't care. Hopefully the chill would sober me up. Walking over to the railing I leaned forward over it, breathing in the fresh air and letting the breeze blow back my hair from my face. My head was spinning but I loved the feeling.

"Thinking of jumping?" I recognized the husky voice without needing to turn around to see who had snuck up on me. But I still did just because of the need to look at him again. I blamed the alcohol.

Mattheo walked towards where I was standing with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. Something about him just screamed power. At some point he had ran his hand through his hair, pushing it back from his forehead yet a few loose waves fell forward as he tilted his head to the side to study me.

"Following me now Riddle?" I smiled sweetly, mimicking the head tilt.

His head snapped back. "Don't flatter yourself Blackwood." He growled stepping closer.

"Oh look, dick Mattheo's back." I chuckled thinking I had said it in my head but the words came from my mouth.

"Remember who you're speaking to love." He snarled. It was dark but I could see the anger flash in his eyes as his face got closer to mine.

"What are you going to do? Kill me?" I asked quietly, testing him. I could definitely thank the alcohol for this confidence I now had. His hand flew to my throat once again, digging his fingers in with just as much strength as last time. I didn't look away from his eyes as he leaned me backwards over the railing, my feet lifting off the floor.

"I could let go and feel nothing for it." He purred in my ear as his body pressed against mine. He lowered my further back watching my reaction.

I didn't want him to know that at this point I was terrified, knowing that if he let go, I would die. Instead, I grabbed the hand that was around my throat and held his deadly gaze.

"I could let go and you would fall. A student who couldn't handle her alcohol falling from the astronomy tower. No one really knows who you are here. Darcy and Pansy would be sad for a moment but they would soon get over it. Over you. Your death would mean nothing to me." He growled and the sudden realisation that he might actually do it hit me.

Before I could open my mouth to scream for him to stop he pulled me back and I gasped in the breath he had taken from me. My feet hit the floor and it took all my power not to fall forward onto my knees while my heart still raced.

Mattheo was done with me though. He turned around and walked towards the stairs without another word, leaving me to massage the tender bruises that were already forming on my neck.

"Why didn't you let me fall?" I dared to ask and he stood still at the first step.

"Because I don't want you dead just yet Clarissa." The way he said my name made my stomach flutter and I got a feeling that I hadn't felt for a long time. Well, I had never felt it before if I was being honest with myself.

"So, if you don't want me dead yet, you would save me then?" I challenged him.

"I wouldn't go as far as saving you." He smirked as he turned back to me with a raised brow. He was clearly back to enjoying our conversation.

I pushed myself up on the railing, perching my arse on the edge. The metal was so cold that I could feel it though the fabric of my dress. "Shall we test that?" I bit my lip, not really knowing where I was going with this. Fuck, if I lost my balance there really was no way of saving me.

"Don't test me Love." He took a step forward and I leaned back gripping hold of the bar tighter. This was stupid. I was stupid. Yet I couldn't stop. His anger was mixed with something else and I wanted to find out what it was.

"Get down." He commanded with a deep growl and took another step forward. I leaned back a little further, smiling. It wasn't like I was going to let go but he didn't know me well enough to know that.

"You're going to fall." When he spoke this time his voice was softer. Almost like he was trying to be careful while he held out his hand wanting me to take it.

"And you don't want me to die yet." I smiled but pushed his hand away.

My other hand lost its grip on the railing and I felt myself falling back. His eyes widened for a split second before he was swallowed by the darkness and I fell further away.