Chapter 16: I Can't Move On

(Cecelia's Pov)

It's been a few days since I left my room, let alone my bed unless it was to pee which wasn't likely cause I never left to get water and because frankly I didn't care; all I know is I'm not leavin this bed or my dorm...

I'm just numb...I lost one of the most important person in my life...I lost the one person who I looked up to as a kid, who I've been through thick and thin with...I lost my whole world...and he's never comin back...I can't move on...and I don't want to...I can't...I can't...

I let out a shaky breath as my body ached and I felt so weak. I sighed and sniffled as I weakly got out of bed and headed to Cedric's dorm which luckily he's a prefect meaning he gets his own room. I walked in seein it was empty it also just felt like I couldn't breathe knowin he was gone...I struggled to breathe and walked over to his bed. My bottom lip quivered as I sniffled and went to his dresser.

I got out of a jumper of his and slid it on which it was twice my size. Tears streamed down my face as I slid on his bed and snuggled against his pillows hopin it'll bring me closer to him. His bed, pillow, blankets and clothes smelled like him. I closed my eyes and hugged his pillow tightly and choked on sobs...Why him? Why me? I can't do this...

(3rd Person View)

After a while everyone was just tryin to pass the time. The twins still pranked people, Hermione and Ginny tried to study, and Oliver and Harry practiced quidditch...but the one question and concern on everyone's mind was Cecelia...they all loved and worried about her so much and they just wanted her to be okay but everyone knew she wouldn't...not for a long time...

Everyone wanted to comfort her but Oliver thought it would just overwhelm her so they decided see her when the time was right. Oliver always checked on her every mornin, lunch and supper to see if she would agree to eat something but she couldn't...how could she?

Her stomach was constantly in knots, she could never sleep as everytime she closed her eyes she saw her big brother's dead body...She couldn't get it out of her head and it plagued in her mind like a virus...everyday felt like a nightmare as she had to relive her brother's death and how she couldn't do anything to help him...and now he's gone...forever...how can someone just get over that? Cecelia doesn't think she ever will.

Ginny and Hermione had a hard time readin and studyin as they wanted to check on Cece to see how she was doin. They hoped she'd be hungry and thirsty so both went to the kitchen and made her something to eat. Hermione made her coffee while Ginny made a small meal as she's helped her mother cook before so she picked up a few skills.

After they finished, they headed to the Hufflepuff house and did the secret password. When they walked in, the common room was empty "Cece?" Hermione called out. The girls looked at each other and shrugged as they headed up to the girls dorm room. Hermione knocked on the door and heard nothin and walked in seein Cece not there.

The girls looked at each other in confusion until they heard cryin from above. They looked at each other and walked up to the prefect room and knocked "Cece?" They called out, they walked in seein Cece lyin on Cedric's bed wearin his jumper and holdin his pillow tightly while cryin.

The girls looked at each other and frowned as they hated seein their friend so broken and hurt. They walked up to the bed and set the food and drinks on the dresser and sat on the edge of the bed rubbin her head and back. Hermione thought she needed tissues and water so Ginny kept her company while Hermione went to do so.

When Hermione came back, she set them by the food and sat at the edge of the bed. Both girls frowned at how miserable their friend was but there was nothin they could do, "We thought you might be hungry and thirsty so Ginny made you a light meal and I made you coffee and brought you water" Hermione said,

Ginny nodded "We just wanted to check in and see how you are and if you needed anything" Ginny said, Cece just nodded which made the girls frown "well, we'll be in the library if you need anythin else" Hermione said, Cece nodded as they headed out which made Cece sigh...

She hated worryin the others, but there was nothin she could do and no one blamed her for bein this way of course...how could they? Everyone knew how close Cece and Cedric were and now he's gone...Cece lost part of herself so everyone understood why she's miserable.

Cecelia could smell the food and coffee from where she was and all it did was make her nauseous. Cece weakly got up and put the plate by the door hopin the smell would leave her nose. She walked back and drank the water then the coffee and blew her nose that was STUFFED to brim.

Once she finished, she lied back on the Ced's bed and rolled over to look out the window. She grabbed her Ipod she brought in and played some music...however, it only made everythin hurt worse as each song reminded her of Cedric and everythin just came back as she would sob again...the jumper and pillow were covered in snot and tears...

"Laying in the silence Waiting for the sirens Signs, any signs I'm alive still I don't wanna lose it I'm not getting through this Hey, should I pray? should I pray To myself? To a God? To a saviour who can

Unbreak the broken Unsay these spoken words Find hope in the hopeless Pull me out of the train wreck Unburn the ashes Unchain the reactions, I'm not ready to die, not yet Pull me out of the train wreck Pull me out, pull me out, pull me out Pull me out, pull me out" Cecelia tried to sing but couldn't as she trembled and choked on sobs so loudly she's sure anyone from outside of the house could hear her but she didn't care...she wanted it out...she wanted everythin out and to be over with...but she was scared to let go fearin she'll forget Cedric...fearin that he'll become nothin but a memory and she doesn't want that...she doesn't want to forget...she can't forget...she won't

"Underneath our bad blood We still got a sanctum, home Still a home, still a home here It's not too late to build it back 'Cause a one-in-a-million chance Is still a chance, still a chance And I would take those odds

Unbreak the broken Unsay these spoken words Find hope in the hopeless Pull me out of the train wreck Unburn the ashes Unchain the reactions, I'm not ready to die, not yet Pull me out the train wreck Pull me out, pull me out, pull me out Pull me out, pull me out, pull me out

You can say what you like 'cause see, I would die for you I, I'm down on my knees and I need you to be my God Be my help, be a savior who can

Unbreak the broken Unsay these reckless words Pull me out of the train wreck Unburn the ashes Unchain the reactions, I'm not ready to die, not yet Pull me out of the train wreck Pull me out, pull me out, pull me out Pull me out, pull me out, pull me out" The song finished as Cecelia couldn't even sing or talk anymore without burstin into tears. She held tightly onto his pillow and screamed as loud as she could in it.

She didn't hear anyone come in until Harry and Ron came to check on her this time. Their hearts dropped when they heard her screamin as they followed her strained sobs and screams up to the prefect room. They burst open the door seein Cecelia on Cedric's bed, curled up in a ball just releasin everything into his pillow.

Ron and Harry's hearts broke at the sight as they sat on either side of her and pulled her up and hugged her tightly. She trembled, shook and sobbed as she whimpered for Cedric to come back...Ron and Harry's eyes watered as they just held her tightly until she calmed down...

Once she did, she was so weak...she felt so weak and so exhausted as she lied her head on Harry's chest and gripped onto his shirt with one shaky hand and held Ron's hand with her other shaky hand. Both boys looked at each other with sad faces as Harry rubbed her head and back while Ron rubbed her hand and arm.

Harry hummed and rocked her back and forth until eventually she passed out. Both boys looked at each other and sniffled "What the bloody hell just happened?" Ron whispered, Harry shrugged and looked around seein her Ipod and played the next song which was a sad song.

Both boys frowned as Harry turned it off and put it on Ced's dresser, "She must have been listenin to sad songs then everythin just came back" Harry whispered, they sighed "What do we do?" Ron asked, "There's not much we can do Ron...she's grieving...she just lost her other half...the only thing we can do is be there for her while she grieves" Harry said,

Ron frowned and nodded and looked around and saw a plate of food by the door "I guess the girls came by earlier and tried to get her to eat somethin" Ron stated, Harry nodded "How long has it been since she ate?" he asked, Harry sighed "Couple of days" He said, Ron frowned "She has to eat somethin" He said,

Harry nodded "I know but we can't really force her too...her stomach is probably all kinds of messed up right now...she still need a few days to process everythin" Harry said, Ron nodded "Should we get Oliver?" Ron asked, "No, she's asleep. We can at least tell him what happened" Harry said,

Ron nodded as Harry gently lied her on the pillow and covered her up with the blankets. Him and Ron kissed her head and headed out to the Quidditch Stadium seein Oliver there like always "OLIVER!" Harry shouted, Oliver flew to them and hopped off his broom "What do ya need Lads?" he asked,

Both boys frowned "We just wanted to update you on Cece" Ron said, Oliver sighed and nodded "How is she?" He asked, "not good" Harry said, Oliver nodded "She's grieving. That's ta be expected" He said, the boys nodded "the girls tried bringin her food but she didn't eat it. We ran in to hear her screamin...she was listenin to sad music and just lost it" Harry said,

Oliver frowned and ran his fingers thru his hair "we comforted her until she managed to pass out again. But we thought you should know" Ron said, Oliver nodded "thanks for lettin me know. I'll go check on her" he said, the boys nodded as Oliver went to freshen up.

When he got to the Hufflepuff dorm, he walked up the prefect room knowin she was there. When he got there, he saw her broken state sleepin somewhat peacefully...but he didn't really know if sleepin was even peaceful for her anymore...He frowned as he quietly walked up to her. He sat on the bed and brushed a strand of wet hair out of her face and caressed her pale, yet red and puffy tear stained cheeks.

He sighed and sat on the bed for a while to keep her company. Her breathin was a little fast and heavy but that's to be expected. He ran his fingers through her hair which was a little crusty from the tears and snot and just lack of hygiene but Oliver didn't judge because he knew what was gonna happen and whatever happened he was going to be there for her every step of the way...not just him...but the others as well...He just wished she knew that she wasn't alone in this...

(Oof...srry it's somewhat short and depressing!)

(2100 Words)