Chapter 29: stop!

(A/n): warning bullying and self harm

Gene's PoV (the next day at school)

As I walked through the school, I was shoved up a wall. I opened my eyes to see Sasha and Zenix standing in front of me snickering.

I tried to get up and walk away, but they stopped me.

Sasha kicked me to the floor, and punched me in my face, causing my nose to bleed.

"This is what you get, for being a gay freak," she said

I didn't do anything, as I thought 'maybe I do deserve this'.

Zenix joined in, hitting and punching me till they finally got bored.

They walked away laughing.

I was in a lot of pain, but I ignored it and went on with the day.

I decided to skip, since I hadn't in awhile and I didn't feel like going to class, especially if Zane wasn't there.

I limped outside, my leg stung with pain. Maybe I should've went to the nurses office, but what else were they going to do other than get me a plaster and an ice pack.

My head ached and I felt like I was about to pass out.

This is what I deserve, right?

I'm a bad person, I'm a delinquent, a bully, a bad boyfriend, a bad friend, a loser, a gay freak.

This is what I get for all the terrible, stupid things I've done in life.

Is it even worth living anymore?

Zane, when I'm around him I become a better person, a better me. Without him I'm nothing and I turn back into that selfish, delinquent, bully I've always been, because he's the one who changed me. He brings the good out in me, I need him, I want him and I won't lose him.

Even if he does hate me, I don't care, I will find him and bring him home. I have to, I love him.

I felt a tear roll down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away, not wanting to cry.

I sat down by a wall, near the back off the school.

I felt so alone...

Soon enough the bell rung and students were dismissed from their classes.

"Gene?" I heard

I turned my head to see Dante.

"Hey bro..." I smiled weakly

"You ok?" He asked sitting next to me

"Yeah, just... hurt," I said

He noticed how beat up I was.

"Wanna go home?" He asked, worried

"Sure," I said

I struggled to stand up, when I did I almost fell back down but luckily was caught by Dane.

"Thanks," I thanked him

"Cmon," he said

On the way home Dante had to support me otherwise I would have fell to the ground.

When we got home Dante helped me to my room and sat me down.

"Need anything?" He asked

"No," I replied

"Well I have to go back to school okay," he said

I nodded and laid down my back facing the wall.

The door closed and Dante left, going back to school.

I started thinking about Zane and all the things we did together.

It was great, while it lasted.

I tried to get up, my feet struggled to support me but I managed. I walked to the kitchen and to get something to eat.

As I was eating the small snack I got, I noticed a knife in the sink.

I had the sudden urge to grab it, but I ignored it and carried on eating.

Once I was done I put the plate in the sink too.

I slowly picked it up.

Thinking about it I could have ended it all there, but that wasn't what I did. I looked at my arm, I wanted to cut it so badly.

The knife was inches away from my arm, as I thought about it.

"I can't do it," I whispered to myself

I tried to slice the knife through my skin, but for some reason I couldn't.

I started crying, I threw the knife back in the sink and ran upstairs, in pain because of what Sasha and Zenix did.

The voices in my head kept telling me to do it, but I just couldn't.

Stop...

I threw myself onto my bed and tried just sleeping. The voices kept getting louder.

Stop...

More tears streamed from my eyes.

I sat up and flung my legs over the edge of the bed.

I tried to breath.

Stop!

I got up and ran downstairs, I didn't care about the pain running through my body I just wanted this all to stop.

I grabbed the Knife and cut my arm with it, instantly the voices went away and left me relieved.

Blood fell from my arm, onto the floor, but I didn't care, at least there gone...for now.