All That Matters

Daryl's POV

"Y'know," Negan mused, tappin' his damn bat against his boot, Hershel's blood still drippin', "I think I miss her already. Feisty little thing. That mouth on her? Damn." He whistled low. "She's gonna be fun... but you - you look like a sad little kitten... I think... you want to help her. Get her away from me."

"Yeah." I ground out, tryin' desperately to keep my cool, not give 'the asshole more reason to hurt her.

My Ath. My damn wife. Fuck.

"Daryl, Daryl, Daryl," he drawled mockingly, eyes glintin' like he was enjoyin' this too goddamn much. "I want you to work for me," He leaned in close, his breath hot and smug. "But I need you to want it. In fact, I want you to goddamn beg for it." He chuckled. "Your fine lady? She's a placeholder, your incentive, if you will. Something to get your blood pumping."

My fists tightened, my whole body coiled like a wire ready to snap. But I forced the word out through gritted teeth.

"How?"

Negan's grin widened.

"Now that's the right question," he said, waggin' a finger. "You find me. You come and say please. You show me you deserve to work for me. She goes free. Easy, peasy, lemon squeezy."

"Take me."

"Daryl," he chuckled, clappin' a hand on my shoulder, " You don't get it, do you? No free rides... Ya gotta earn it... But I do hope I'll be seeing you, very, soon."

~

Fuckin' pain. Everywhere.

Sittin' deep in my ribs, sharp as a knife with every breath I take. My jaw's so swollen I can hardly move it, the taste of blood sittin' thick on my tongue. Every inch of me's bruised up, skin split open where their boots came down too hard, where their fists did their worst.

I keep remindin' myself why I'm here.

For her.

Negan gave me a choice after she was driven away on that fuckin' awful night. Told me he wanted me to work for 'im. But that I had to want it. If I did. He'd let her go.

I didn't wanna work for that fuckin' asshole. Course I didn't. But he took Ath, could do anythin' to her. She's tough as hell. But she's my wife, 'n' it's my job to protect her. I fuckin' failed her that night. Too many guns on us. Too many men. But I was gonna make it right.

I told Negan I'd go with 'im right then. Long as he let her go. But he laughed in my face. Told me there were no free rides. I knew what I had to do. I had to find their compound myself, roll up and make him believe I wanted to work - be one of 'em.

That's what he wanted.

And I'd do anythin' to make sure she was safe.

Took me a whole day to find it 'n' then some. The second I got back to my bike near the tracks, I was gone. Didn't go back to Alexandria. Couldn't. Just kept ridin', searchin' for places the Saviors could be holed up. Rulin' out areas I already knew.

It was obvious when I finally found it. Huge buildin' a couple hours away with goddamn walkers chained up outside like a freak show. Bunch'a assholes outside messing' with 'em.

I scouted it. Tried to see if there was a way I could get inside. Get her outta there myself so we could be together, but it seemed fuckin' impossible.

I kept tellin' ma'self I couldn't just rush in half-cocked. I could get her hurt more. But the fire inside me when I knew she was there, in that buildin' - I felt like it could burn me alive.

When I knew where it was, and that pretendin' I would sell my soul to 'em was the only way to keep her safe, I raced back to Alexandria. Made Merle promise to take Ath far away for a while, look after her, keep her safe from these assholes until shit got sorted.

I made Rick swear he'd be there at Negan's place with Merle too, get her outta there quick in case things went south.

They both told me I was an idiot, that we'd find another way. But I couldn't wait. She'd been there too long already. All I wanted was to get her out. I didn't care what happened to me. I couldn't bear the thought of what they could be doin' to her. They finally agreed when they knew I was doing it with or without 'em.

I didn't tell no-one else I was leavin'. Not even Carol. I didn't even go see her. I didn't wanna hang around in Alexandria. I didn't wanna see Maggie or Beth. Not after what I did.

Rick 'n' Merle would stay hidden - unless things went to hell - waitin' for them to bring her out, then Merle would get goin' with her until things settled. We had to make sure they wouldn't find her. We'd picked a place a few hours out that they'd never look.

Ath wouldn't wanna leave. She'd fight. But I told them to do anythin' they could to keep her safe, tell her anythin'. I gave 'em a note for her. I ain't good with words. But I had stuff I needed to say, just in case. Gave Merle my wedding ring to look after, too. Meant too much to me to risk 'em takin' it.

She was gonna be pissed. But if I made it through this alive. I could make it up to her then, if she'd let me. Her being alive was all that mattered right now. I didn't have no other options.

The whole car ride. I wondered if I was bein' a fuckin' idiot. If I was walkin' into a trap, a trick. But it didn't matter. I had to try.

'Sides, Negan was an asshole - I hated him for what he did to Hershel 'n' Abraham - but I didn't peg 'im as a liar. I knew he wanted me on his side. Knew there was a reason he hadn't just killed me when I fucked up that night.

I deserved to die. Not Hershel. But I didn't. He kept me alive for a reason.

I walked up to the gate, my hands in the air like a fuckin' pussy. Got dragged inside. Beaten to hell straight away. I just let 'em. Wasn't gonna fight back until I'd got her out. They took my clothes, threw me in a cell.

The worst part was when she saw me - naked and bloody. I wish he hadn't brought her. Wish she didn't have to see it. But it was part of Negan's plan to break me. He told me he'd kill her if I spoke to her. And it broke my damn heart hearin' her voice say my name 'n' me havin' to act like I wanted to ignore her. But I did it for her.

I didn't mean to look up. My body did it for me. Just for a second - like it knew it needed to see her one last time in case I didn't make it back outta there.

I was so relieved that she didn't look beat up. Wasn't stripped naked. I don't know what I'd have done.

Negan was pissed. Told some of his pricks to kill her. I lost it. I was furious. They knocked me out when I fought, and when I woke up. I didn't know if she was still alive.

A woman came to my cell. I dunno who. Didn't see her. But she whispered through the door - told me she'd seen Ath get away in a car with two men - described Rick 'n' Merle. I believed her.

Hearin' that made it all worth it.

She was safe 'n' that's what mattered. Didn't matter that my heart felt like it was in a million fuckin' pieces. That I might never see the one person who made me truly believe I was worth somethin' again. She was alive 'n' she was far from here. Merle was a dick, but he'd take care of her until we could work this out.

I ain't no-ones bitch. I was gonna pretend for a while. For her, if I had to. But I'll never kneel. Not now I know she's safe. I can't do it. Can't be no-one else.

I'll kill Negan when I can. If I can. He ain't never alone. But he deserves it. I heard him tell 'em to shoot her. Fuckin' asshole.

I told her before I'd kill anyone who tried to take her from me. Him 'n' Dwight had both tried to do that. I'll make 'em pay for it.

~

I see her face in the dark, hear her voice when it's quiet. Every time the door to the cell creaks open, my heart jumps - just for a second - like maybe, somehow, she's gonna be standin' there.

But it ain't never her.

It's always one of 'em.

Dwight, or Negan.

Today, it's both of 'em.

Negan stepped inside like he owned the whole damn world, grinnin' like a cat that just caught itself a bird. Dumb bat slung over his shoulder, all casual, but I knew better. I knew what was comin'.

Dwight stood there with his fuckin', arms crossed, that smug little smirk on his face pissin' me off more than any punch I know I'm 'bout to take.

Negan squatted down in front of me, tiltin' his head like he's real disappointed. "You broke my goddamn heart, Daryl." he says, all smooth-like, like we're just havin' a damn conversation. "Y'see, I like to think I'm a fair man. I told you. You work for me, I give you your girlfriend back. I let her out early on good damn faith, but you, Daryl." He clicked his tongue, shakin' his head. "You betrayed me."

I didn't move. Didn't speak. Just sat there against the cold, damp wall, breathin' through the fire in my ribs. Ain't got the strength to fight, not now. Six of 'em dragged me out into the hall this mornin'. Took turns. Swear I heard ribs crackin'. They won't break me though.

Negan sighed, shakin' his head. "You know, I was hopin' you'd be smarter than this. Thought you understood. But the minute your girlfriend's gone, you make me look like a damn a fool."

"Wife." I gritted out, correctin' him.

I knew it'd piss him off. I didn't give a shit.

He leaned in close, voice droppin' low, all smooth and dangerous. "You'll see Daryl. You'll come around."

I knew what was comin' before it happened.

The first blow knocked me sideways. My skull crackin' against the floor, and pain explodin' behind my eyes.

The second took the breath right outta my lungs.

I lost track after that.

But it was all still worth it - Ath was free from this place. Safe. Somewhere he couldn't get to her.

Negan and his saviours could go fuck themselves

Hope you enjoyed a Daryl POV. ❤️