23. Love Bites

  Chapter 23 - Love Bites

    Waking up to Alex, it's usually the heating warmth from being tangled up with each other that awakes me, but when my eyes begun to flutter open, a sweet strum of an instrument played through my ears beautifully.

    The sun was shining blindly into my eyes. I adjusted my pupils, able to finally see Alex.

    He sat criss-crossed, with his acoustic guitar caressed by his arms. His skin glowed from the vibrant rays, and his messy hair shinned a gold tint.

    The instrument was being strummed by his long fingers. I blushed naturally from what happened last night.

   Despite the thoughts of last night, I laid back on the pillow, taking in the blissful morning and the peaceful sound waves flowing into my ears.

      His singing was raw and raspy with his usual morning voice tying in. The way his eyes were screwed shut and the passion filling the air made him look like he was in a complete different world - he probably thought he was.

     After finishing the song, I slowly clapped my hands. It startled him at first, but his shoulders relaxed and he turned his head toward my direction.

   "Didn't mean to wake you up." He said with a breathily laugh, smiling down at his hands.

    "That was beautiful," I said, placing my hand on his shoulder, wanting to pull him in for a some type morning kiss.

    He took notice, and gave my nose a small kiss. His guitar was shortly placed at the end of his bed, allowing me to cuddle tightly around him.

    For the remainder of the time, we sat in a silence where we both knew that something has changed. It was the quietness that filled the little space between us that had me thinking.

    I loved Alex, and last night, only made my affection for him to burst even more. The way he let me talk to him, and let me tell him my deepest darkest secret and let me cry on him without saying anymore.

      And the way he made me felt last night just by the touch his fingers. It was like my skin was on fire and the insides of me couldn't get enough. Then with waking up next to each other, breathing in both our scents, the sheets tangled within our bodies, and the heat of our bodies keeping both of us warm in the winter we were in.

Alex knew, he probably felt it, and understood.

That's why we both sat here in each other's arms, knowing something had changed.

   I wanted to tell him I love him last night, but my courage vanished, and I was left to my other thoughts and my additional worries. But somehow and in some way, I think he secretly knew.

   His chin had laid on top of my head, and his hand ruffled my hair soothingly. The gentle breeze from the fan above us was slowly making me doze off.

    But that seemed far away, out of my reach. I couldn't help but think of what will happen when I arrive home today. What will my dad and brother say?

    I'll probably be grounded for the rest of my life and will be lucky to even see daylight when I'm not in school.

   Along with that, the recent discovery of finally not denying something I tried to avoid these past months.

The conclusion of the fact I indeed have Impulsive Control Disorder.

    All of my actions I've done in the past lead to my assumption of Alex being right. But still, it was strange that neither Dad nor Derek bothered to tell me that this was what the medication was for. And after God knows how many years of taking the medicine, it only took the boy of my dreams to tell me.

    Deeply sighing, I snuggled further into the crook of his neck, taking in his strong scent.

    After what seemed like hours of pure serenity, no talking, just relaxing and being so close to each other's bodies, we decided it was best to get moving on this Sunday.

    Ah, Sunday. Alex and I loved this day of the week, although hate it almost like we do with Monday.

     Tomorrow it's his worst day of the week where he will grunt all day but I'll still love him, and the next will be his ‘tired’ day of the week where he will sleep in class but I'll still love him. Wednesday will be the 'almost there' day and he'll practice guitar without saying a word to me but I'll still love him, Thursday is deemed to be 'we can make it' and our letters to each other will get sloppy but I'll still love him. Finally, Friday will be the day to spend quality time together, with just pure loving and fullness of greatness and I'll still love him. Saturday will arrive, we will most likely sleep in, share our thoughts, and whatever might possibly be going through that mind of his, and I'll still love him. Sunday will arrive, we will make up the anger inside of us for the fact it's about to be Monday with going out for Sunday breakfast.

     Luckily, I had a pair of jeans left here a long time ago, and I picked out another flannel of Alex's. I was deviously smirking at the fact that I'd be taking home his flannel - which he probably won't get back.

We were just about to leave, until he stopped us after getting his keys on the hook next to the door. "What are you smirking about?" He suspiciously looked at me with a crooked smile.

"Nothing," I innocently said, keeping my eyes fixed on the ceiling.

    Suddenly, I'm pushed up against the wall. I gasped from the unthinkable move from Alex. He had my wrist pinned up and his hips connecting to mine. His breathing tickled down my check, his lips were close to mine. He hovered over me so tall. Curse me for being so short.

   "I bet you I can make you say what you're thinking easily." He said, his lips nibbling at my ear.

     My breathing was delayed at my lungs, leaving my mouth wide open from his choice of words. I felt the warmth of his hand creeping up under my flannel that gained goose bumps from the sudden exposure to the cold air of the apartment.

   "And how do you plan on doing that?" I confidently said, raising my eyebrow.

    The hand of his slowly trailed down to my waist, leaving a burning sensation as it did. My eyes stared at his lips, wanting them to already move in a slow motion with mine.

    "I can easily and without any complications, have you on the edge of an earth shattering orgasm, but won't let you have your way until you tell me why you're smirking like that." He grinned cleverly.

    I gulp from his dirty words, but they were so slick and sharp on his tongue. It was a turn on to hear him talk to me like that. It was surely a new discovery of what I like.

   And yet this boy was younger than me, although he was turning eighteen soon, it still amazed me.

   His hips grinned on top of mine, clearly he was impatient since it took me took too long to respond. The evident bulge coming from his tight skinny jeans made my pulse quickened.

"Huh," He huffed, kissing my neck, sucking on my neck on an already tender spot. "I love your tattoo bites."

   When the last of words came out of his mouth, I gasped loudly, pushing him off of me.

    "Tattoo bites?" I screamed, grabbing my neck, I ran to the bathroom.

   As I stood there in front of the mirror, I finally noticed the hickeys placed on my neck.

    "Love bites." Alex walked behind me with a smug look.

   "Hickeys." I whispered. Completely mortified, I tried to look through the drawers to look for any makeup.

   "Love bites." He corrected me like it even mattered. "And I don't have make up, Tinkerbell."

  Anger fueled in me, and desperately trying to cover up the purple and hint of red splotches on me. "I hate you." I said with the strongest of monotone, looking at him through the mirror.

I actually didn't hate him, I loved him. My body would never let me hate the boy who stood right behind me. It would be impossible to ever hate him.

   "Hmm, I don't think you hated me last night when -" He said before I interrupt him.

   "Okay! Okay! C'mon let's not be late for breakfast." I stormed out of the bathroom, turning off the lights.

    Like always, Sunday breakfast was peacefully quiet. Alex ordered his usual - two eggs, hash browns, and bacon. Although I keep telling him to order three eggs since later in the day, he will text message me saying that it didn't last or fill the feeling he needs, and when I reply back for him to get three eggs next time, his reply always is 'that's not what I meant' and then refuses to tell me what he really meant.

    As I started to clear my plate, the nervous pit filling in my stomach was developing rapidly. The thoughts of what I would have to face when I got home was almost unbearable. My hands couldn't no longer even hold my fork, shaking terribly.

    "Are you okay?" Alex asked concernedly, dropping his fork onto his plate with a loud clattering following after it.

    I hastily nodded my head, staring at my legs. The swelling of my anxiety wouldn't let me look at him.

    In the corner of my eye, I see him placing down a few bills in the center of the table, and quickly, he took me by my elbow and helped me up from seat.

    With my eyes glued to the ground, he led me outside into the unwelcoming and unforgiving cold weather.

     He pushed me to the side, into an isolated area. "Everything's going to be okay." His arms help me into a tight warm embrace. He somehow just knew that I was an anxiety mess. The pressure of his hand slowly raking down my hair gently calmed me down and the words he spoke into my ears did a great deal of justice to the horrendous feeling filling me up.

    Slowly, his touch descended from my skin. He took a step back, his hands cupping my cold face, and then he puts his lips on my forehead tenderly.

   "C'mon," He murmured, taking my hand.

    We're now only just five minutes away from my house. The wait seemed forever lasting with the silence between Alex and I, and not the good type of silence.

    Alex's nervousness started to show, the one leg that was not on the petal, was uncontrollably shuddering. The tapping of his fingers on his leather wheel was easily heard, every tap went through my ears, I took it as another thought racing in his head. His mouth was moving as if he was talking, but nothing was being spoken, he was clearly talking to himself.

   I feared for him, knowing he has history with panic attacks. "Alex," I barely even choked it out.

    His brown wearily eyes found mine for a short second until they went back to focusing on the road ahead of us.

    "Everything's going to be okay." I recited his words earlier with a small sympathetic smile.

   As we pulled into the drive way, I flipped my hair over my collarbones, trying to hide the evidence of last night. I tried to pull myself together, and tried to act at least presentable. Well this was certainly going to be fun...

   I tugged on my coat, keeping the warmth of it while we waited at the front door. Alex had given me a small nod, probably not really sure what to say or do but just to knock on the door.

    The door came swinging open with Derek behind it, looking relieved more than ever. His tense shoulders loosen with a heavy huff coming out of his mouth. He suddenly grabbed me into a full hug, squeezing all the air out of me. The cracking of my back was just enough proof of how tight the hug was.

"Never do that again." He firmly whispered.

    I nodded my head into his shoulder. Pulling away, I knew this must have been awkward for Alex, especially for all the recent events.

    Derek took recognition of Alex by giving him a curt nod after straightening up his shoulders. We all exchange glances, Derek looked still, Alex reeked fear, and then there was me who stood there with being utterly speechless and not knowing what to do.

   We finally walk into the hostile house. Everything seemed to be a little too quiet. There weren't any lights found to be on while we walked our way into the kitchen. I tried to focus on my breathing, already knowing something was up to no good.

   Things took a twist the minute I stepped foot into the kitchen with Derek and Alex. My hand immediately reached out for Alex's arm to block him to walk any further.

There sat at the table, under the single light, was my father and my uncle.

    Suspicious at the scene, I glanced over at Alex. He seemed to have put himself together and looked collective as ever. He was clearly now well rounded rather than me who was on the urge of a mental breakdown.

It was Uncle Gabe.

My least favorite only uncle and my dad's only least favorite brother.

    My dad and he always were in competition of being better while growing up. But with Uncle Gabe being the oldest, he won being 'better', at least that's what my dad told me. Even the last time I've seen Uncle Gabe in kindergarten was forced upon by my mother, her argument was "they're the kid's uncle! And it's time to be nice to your brother."

    The whole week when he stayed over, they did nothing but argue. To which football team from who was mother's favorite. Along with too much bickering over everything little thing known to mankind.

   They couldn't stand each other, and that's why I'm questioning why he is even here.

    Dad cleared his throat with rubbing the bridge of his nose. He stood up, walking over to us while Uncle Gabe sipped his coffee, not even saying hello to me after all the years of not seeing each other.

   "Laila, right now isn't the best time." He was referring to Alex and just me in general. I could tell he wanted to say more, but with Uncle Gabe around, he wouldn't be talking about all of this until we're alone.

     I leave the kitchen with Alex to my room upstairs. It was strange leading him there, it was the first of having him over without any secrets, or just having him over without him being about to be punched by my father. It was nice, very nice feeling actually.

  "So are you going to tell me who's that?" He sat down on my bed the minute I closed the door behind me.

"My Uncle Gabe." I groaned loudly, rubbing my face.

   "Ahh," He nodded his head slightly from the information I told him.

    I was eager to be in my room actually. I wanted to see where my papers were, and now that I was here, they were out of sight, misplaced, and probably gone forever.

    The urge to cry was strong, but with Alex near me, I didn't want to feel weak any more than I have been these past days. But all those papers, every word, trace of thought, and what I put my soul out on to, completely vanished. I knew I was never going to get them back, and that, made me dreadfully upset.

      I had laid right next to Alex on my stomach, exhausted. The temptation of just fully screaming into the pillow that I had my head stuffed in was lingering in my mind. But I decided against, probably best not to cause a scene. I could hear the clattering of plates and talking down stairs, but I didn’t care to what it was even about. The silence between Alex and I made me thrive even more for a sweet nap.

   Shortly, Alex who was sitting criss crossed had laid down next to my side, wrapping his arm around me. The affectionate kiss he placed on my forehead caused my eye lids to gradually close.

     With him laying right next to me, it got me thinking of how far Alex have come. It felt like our first date was years ago and our encounter with Caleb at the coffee shop was decades ago. But in reality, it’s been two months, and we were heading towards December, which Alex will turn eighteen.

   A giggle slipped out of my lips by the thought of him being younger than me and technically our relationship was ‘illegal’.

   “What is it now?” He deviously smirked.

   “You’re jail bait.” I nonchalantly flat out said.

   He chuckled loudly. The raspiness that was held in the deep of his throat was like music to my ears. “Hmm, good point, Laila Rose.” He cheekily said.

   “I try.” I lazily shrugged. Jokingly acting like it was no big deal of my ‘good point’.

    For the rest of the time, we talked about little things here and there. Sadly at some point in our conversation I was reminded of the homework that still was placed unfinished in my bag. Clearly I was not looking forward for it since I’ve forgotten about it up till now, but it wasn’t like I was excited to do it either. What’s the point of homework anyways? Was spending six hours at school each day not good enough?

    Although the dread topic of homework was talked about, Alex mentioned wanting to go on another date, but he so far didn’t have any ideas yet.

     It caused a spur of excitement, even if our first date was at Chucky E. Cheese, it was sure fun as hell. I predicted that this date would be just as equal of fun. Anytime with Alex is always exciting, even if it may be like something anyone would see as 'boring', but if Alex is there, he can light up the mood easily.

   “The boys and I have a gig coming up,” He spoke, staring into my eyes. His hand gazed across my cheek to the strain of hair that had fallen out of place, he gently pushed it behind me ear. “I’d like you to come.”

   A smile widen at my lips, he wanted me to come to his gig. He wanted me to be there in presence, and to support his band. Of course, large groups never been within my liking, and he knew that, but if the gig was going to be like the gig from last night, then I’m more than eager to join along.

   “Yeah just tell me when it is.” I said in a low tone, scooting closer to him.

   “It’s in two weeks.” He informed me.

   We ended up falling asleep, with the radio softly playing, and being in each other’s arms. We didn’t mean for this to happen, but it was inevitable.

     I woken up before him, but the minute his hand started to slowly stoke up and down my spine smoothly, I knew he was now awake. The sun was full blasting into my room, I guessed it was noon, but at this point, I didn’t care what time it was. Time with Alex didn’t mean anything to me; it was how it was spent. And with the short months between Alex and me, I already fallen in love with him; so easily, and quite hard in fact.

    “We should probably go down stairs to see what’s up.” Alex suggested, breaking the silence. He slowly got up, untangling my limbs from his body. I was disappointed by the action of his and missed the warmth between us.

    “No,” I protested with a groan. There was no way in hell I was going to go down stairs voluntarily. Alex started to tug on my ankles, gripping them lightly. I take a clutch on the iron poles to my bed, my body being stretched as he tugged on harder.

   “C’mon, Tinkerbell.” He whined, finally letting go of my ankles.

    I glance back at him in the corner of my eye. He stood there with his arms crossed, staring at me with his eyes squinted. “Hmm, fine. Looks like I can find another girl to take to the gig.” He nonchalantly said.

 Heavily sighing, I got up. "Yeah right." I snorted at his dry joke.

    "Lay off with being sarcastic, would ya? You're stealing my flannel aren't you?" He smirked at me, knowing that was what I was thinking before he pushed me up against the wall, trying to get me to say why I was so smug. He knew all along.

This bastard...

      We cautiously walked down stairs. The chatter I expected to hear wasn't there. Everything was too quiet for my liking. Funny how I think that but here I am being the 'mute' girl. The house still looked gloomy, the sun was the only source of anything being light, and the ticking of the clock was easily heard. Our surroundings were still and as we approached the kitchen, something was telling me this was going to go wrong.

    Uncle Gabe happened to be here, which is a rare event, and I knew he was an attorney. Derek and Dad wanted to talk to us at another time rather than when Uncle Gabe was around? 

    Sure, Dad doesn't want to be a complete idiot near Uncle Gabe. But something about this whole ordeal was suspicious. Dad couldn’t stand Uncle Gabe.

    We walked into the kitchen. Dad was already sitting tall at the table with Derek. Uncle Gabe was nowhere in sight, I naturally assumed he was probably in the guest bedroom.

    "We need to have a talk," Dad said with an intimidating voice, scaring me greatly.

Fuck.

___________a.n

Sorry for a suckish update - first week of school was hell.

Yearbook has me overloaded along with journalism and I have so many projects already and Spanish is killing me. Going from going to bed until 5am, and then having to wake up at 5am for school has hit me the hardest ;-; But don't worry, there's going to be updates - speaking of updates, vote and comment!

Chapter dedication: VickyBVB <3

-Kc Aus 22 2014