Chapter 38 - I Need You

Chapter 38 - I Need You

I guess we all wanted 😏

TW: SMUT with lots of emotions.

Jade pov

"Love, you know you can stop at any time. Remember that" I whisper.

Perrie looks at me with those ocean blue eyes I could drown in for hours, my breath catching in my throat. I accepted that I might never have her like this again. But the darkness in her eyes tells me that this time things will be different.

"I don't want to stop" she tells me in a rough voice.

I swallow as I release what she said.

"I want you" she whispers in my ear as chills run down my spine.

God, I want you too

I've never stopped wanting you

"You can say no. You can stop me at any time" I remind her.

She nods, "I know. I trust you".

"I love you, baby" I tell her with emotion.

"I love you, Jade" her lips are a beat away from mine. I can feel her warm breath, her vanilla scent, the warmth of her skin touching mine.

There is nothing in the world I wouldn't do to stay like this forever. Just the two of us, without fear, the past or the world weighing us down.

Just the two of us and our love

I caress her face and pull her closer to me to take her lips in mine, I bite her gently and run my tongue over the freckle on her upper lip, she half-closes her mouth and that's all I need to get my tongue in and explore her.

We dance in a slow, passionate rhythm, getting to know each other again as if for the first time. My hands roam over her perfect body, I run my fingers over her back feeling the relief of the scars under the fabric of her dress, she runs her hands over my abdomen, tracing the line of my abs, then moving up to my breasts. The lace covers my skin but I can perfectly feel the warmth of her touch on my nipples and a moan escapes my mouth.

I look at her intently, "May I?" I ask as I reach for the zip slider. She nods but that's not enough for me, "Say it. I want to hear it" I whisper to her.

"Yes, you can" she replies. I want her to feel like she has full control over everything that's going to happen, I want her to not have a moment where she can doubt or feel lost. I want her to know that she is safe.

I unzip her dress, the sound of our breathing fills the silence of the room. Her eyes close and when she opens them again I see a thousand emotions. Fear, uncertainty, joy, desire. I think my eyes match hers. I have never desired anyone as I desire her, I have never been so terrified before.

I reach the bottom and hear Perrie's breathing stop, I know she's afraid I might actually see her, afraid I might not love her because of what they did to her. What she doesn't know is that I can never love anyone more than I love her.

"I love you" I tell her again, "You're the only one in the world" I smile, she looks at me for lies but finds none. She smiles and relaxes, allowing me to remove her dress. The lights are dimmed but allow me to see her body perfectly. And I will never stop repeating it, no matter what, she is a work of art.

She lowers her gaze but I don't let her, I lift her chin and smile at her, my eyes are watery with emotion, " Don't ever doubt of you" I tell her trying to hold back the tears.

She moves closer and kisses me, "I want to see you" she whispers, I agree and feel her hands wander to the edge of my trousers, her fingers sliding over my skin sending shivers down my entire body and goosebumps rise with each of her touches, she lifts my lace t-shirt and I lift my arms to allow her to remove it. Her eyes settle on my breasts and a smile appears on her lips.

"You are beautiful, Jade" she says as her fingers run over my hard nipples. Her touch sends me into ecstasy and I can't help but moan as my head leans against the wall. I had forgotten what it was like to feel her hands on my body and there is no better feeling in the world.

Perrie continues to touch my breasts, circling and scratching them with her slender fingers, her touch is uncertain and hesitant but sweet as butter, my eyes are closed as I enjoy the moment, when I least expect it I feel her tongue encircling my right nipple while her hand continues to work on my left, she bites it gently, her warm mouth takes it and sucks it, then releases it and her tongue slides up and down, then starts again, circling it, biting it, sucking it and kissing it.

My brain is in overdrive, everything seems to be in place, she pulls away and moves onto the other, her hand starts stroking me again as her mouth works miracles. Her fingers reach the edge of my trousers, I feel her as she unbuckles my belt, the sound of the zip being unzipped mingles with my moans. Her mouth doesn't stop as her hands slide my trousers over my thighs, I move my legs slightly to help her free me from my clothes.

She pulls away and looks at me for a second before kissing me, I look at her adoringly and escort her to the bed, I gently sit her down and straddle her, I resume kissing her, then I move to her jaw and leave wet kisses, I reach her neck, my tongue runs over the point of her pulse, I feel her shudder as a wave of pleasure hits my body as well. I reach up to her ear and bite her lobe, she moans and I feel complete. I hadn't heard this sound in over two years and had forgotten the tune.

"I'm going to take your bra off, alright?" I whisper.

She looks at me intently and agrees, her voice low but firm, I slide my hands behind her back and unhook her bra, slowly slipping it off and tossing it somewhere near the bed. I look at her for any reaction that would tell me to stop but her intense eyes tell me she's fine.

I gently push her so that her back touches the sheets, I reach down and kiss her, my hands run over her ribs, her hips and her stomach, I gently caress her as I memorise every detail of her body, I feel the relief of more scars, I reach down to kiss each spot as I did with her back, I whisper sweet words and reassurance and run all over her skin leaving wet kisses, I feel her trembling and I look up, her eyes are closed and I can't decipher her face.

"Look at me" I whisper to her, "Stay with me" I see her opening her eyes and looking intently at me, she nods. I know she is here.

I lower myself and reach to her breasts, "Eyes on me. You can stop me at any time" I reiterate, she smiles and gives me a nod of assent, she leans back on her elbows and watches me, my eyes remain fixed in hers as my tongue runs over her nipple, I see her close her eyes and lower her head back, I bite down lightly and another moan escapes her half-closed lips, her expression right now could make me come.

She comes back to look at me and her eyes are three shades darker, my hand encircles her other breast while my tongue works relentlessly on her nipple, we never take our eyes off each other, there is nothing as exciting as watching her enjoy. Goose bumps cover her skin every time my tongue touches her or my teeth bite her. More moans fill the room, I move to the other and do it all again, with the same attention and passion.

I slowly move lower, letting my tongue trace a line along her abdominals, I run along the scar from the operation she had undergone as a child and get to the level of her panties, I look down at her and now see the shame. I come back up and stand in front of her, "What's going on?" I ask her.

She looks away and I see her eyes become watery, "Look at me. Talk to me" I tell her cautiously.

She turns to me and takes a deep breath, "I don't want you to see" her voice a whisper away from breaking.

"See what?"

"What he left behind" she tells me as a confession.

"There is nothing that will ever change my mind about you" I reassure her, "But we don't have to continue. We can stop" I tell her with a sincere smile.

I see the indecision but then she shakes her head, "I need you" she begs me. I look at her confused, "I need you to make me remember how it should be" We both close our eyes as our foreheads touch.

Why am I so afraid?

I swallow and then agree, I return to where I was before and wonder what she doesn't want me to see. I kiss her iliac bone and feel her shiver, I grab the edge of her panties and before I can ask she gives me permission, I slide down her legs and kiss her ankles, shins, knees and thighs to get in front of her core. I take her left thigh and bend her knee, I start kissing her inner thigh not letting even a patch of skin escape, I slide my tongue just above her clit and take her other thigh, I hear her sigh and then her hand grabbing mine, I squeeze it and she spreads her legs slightly. Then I see it. The one he left behind.

My eyes fill with tears as I look at the phrase he carved on her thigh, 'my slut'. My eyes let go of the tears and I can't stop my mind from imagining the moment he did it to her.

"Don't do it" I hear her voice, "Don't imagine it" she begs me.

I kiss her skin again and again wishing I could erase the scar and her pain, my hand drawing invisible circles on the back of hers. I move a little and look at her beautiful wet pussy, I know it could be more but I also know that fear is holding her back and not allowing her to feel completely comfortable. And that is exactly what I want to change.

I want her to know that no one will ever hurt her like they did, I want her to be able to trust me completely again.

I blow on her core and feel her shiver, "How are you feeling?" I ask as I look up and meet her eyes, she gives a small smile.

"I'm scared. But I trust you. I know you won't hurt me. I... I think I'm ready" she admits and a smile tugs at my lips.

I open her legs slightly and lower myself, my nose inhaling her scent, my tongue savouring her sweet, vanilla taste. Her taste is a drug for me that I had forgotten to crave.

Perrie lays back fully and arches her back, her hand clasping mine as I continue to lick her, wiping away her wetness that is replaced by new. With each lick more appears and I know she is slowly relaxing. I moan at the taste as she moans at the newfound sensation.

I suck her clit and bite it, the sounds she makes make me shudder and I feel waves of pleasure and desire sweep over me. "Jade, I need you" her voice a whisper, "Let me feel"

I understand and accept, I hold her hips as I harden my tongue and slowly penetrate her, she stiffens and I fear she has regretted it but her hand grabs my hair and makes me stay in place. I do it again and she grips my hair, "Faster" her voice breaks. I comply with her request and stimulate her clit with my fingers as my tongue moves in and out of her.

"Oh God, Jade" she moans my name and I feel her walls tighten around my tongue. She's getting closer and I can't wait to feel her come and fill my face.

I keep going in and out of her as if my life depended on it and I adjust my speed by listening to her body.

"Jade! Fuck! I'm going to-" she doesn't finish as her body tenses and her hips move in sync with my thrusts, I slow down but don't stop allowing her to ride out the orgasm, her thighs close around my head in an iron grip. There is no danger of me escaping, however.

I savour the sweet taste of her cum on my tongue and moan at the taste.

Dear God

When her hips stop, I rise slowly and see a light coating of sweat on her skin, her chest moves up and down quickly, her lips are half-open and her eyes closed.

God, she is beautiful

"Are you with me?" I ask her in a low voice, she opens her eyes and looks at me with sincere emotion, her eyes are shiny and I know she is holding back tears. She smiles and nods as her hand takes my cheek and pulls it closer to her. I kiss her, allowing her to savour on my mouth.

Each moment is like a precious diamond, to be remembered and cherished.

I pull back just enough to look at her and see tears wet her face, "Talk to me, baby" I ask her.

She smiles, "Everything is fine. It was perfect, Jade. I had forgotten how it felt. Thank you for reminding me" her voice cracks at the end and I feel my tears fall too.

"Thank you for letting me" I whisper to her as I lean in closer, we kiss again and again. The moonlight illuminates her naked body and I run my fingers over her skin as my head rests against her chest. I listen to her heartbeat and thank every god that she is here with me.

"Jade..." I hear her call to me. I lift my head and look at her.

"Tell me, love"

"Can... can we stop?" she whispers.

I smile genuinely because I know what it cost her to ask me this question and I admire her courage.

"Sure, love. Whatever you want" I tell her lovingly and feel a sigh leave her lips.

"I love you, Jade Thirlwall"

"I love you, Perrie Edwards. Forever".

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A/N - Hope you enjoyed the chapter and see you at the next update! ❤️ Feedbacks are always appreciated so, if you want, comment and share!

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Thank you for reading and take care 🌈🍪

- C