Chapter 38: Solidarity*

Spencer and I settled back into our normal routine back in our apartment very easily after being gone. The team is on a mandatory holiday leave as they haven't had any mandated vacation time for the entire year. They were quite literally forced to take a break by the director. I'm definitely not complaining. All they're doing now until after New Year's is catching up on paperwork in their own time, which apparently they're very behind on, and consulting from the BAU headquarters when absolutely necessary. I've started back at work, so Spencer has been doing stuff from the apartment, hanging out with Ryder, and finalizing everything with his official move to my place. I'm very relieved it's going to be official with him being on the lease with me and all that but it's also terrifying. It's just such an adult thing and I don't feel like an adult most days. I don't want anybody or anything different, though. Some of the best things in life are scary and I have Spencer to do it all with me. That's the best part in all honesty. Today is December 30th so only two more days until it's officially official that we are living together. I'm laying in bed, thinking about all this, as I wait for my alarm to go off. I don't know why but this morning I woke up well before my alarm and just decided to stay in bed next to Spencer until I had to get up even though he's asleep. He's laying on his left side, facing me, as he sleeps, breathing slowly in and out in a calm rhythm. Ryder is curled up in a ball of fur at the foot of the bed between us. I'm very content in this moment and never want it to end. I turn to look at my alarm clock, it reads 6:48 am and I have to get up at 7. I decide to go ahead and get up and get ready so I'm not as rushed since I'm already awake. I move to get out of bed and feel Spencer stir behind me. I stop in my tracks, hoping he will go back to sleep. Instead I'm met with his arms wrapping around me, pulling my back to his front. He settles me back into his embrace and I giggle softly "Spence, I have to get up. I have work at 8." He hums and says "or you could just not go and stay here with me all morning." I giggle again "that sounds amazing Spence, but we essentially did that every day for a week. So, now I need to go to work and make us some money." Spencer shakes his head and kisses my neck. "I make plenty of money, you don't have to go to work." I hum "I know you make plenty of money, but I also like having my own money and I also enjoy my job." Spencer hums again and asks "you enjoy it more than staying in bed all morning with me?" I scoff "Spencer, I could ask you the same thing about all the times you've left in the middle of more intense scenes than this because you got called in to work." Spencer groans and says "yes but I'm saving lives." I pull away and turn to look at him "oh so you're saying your work is more important than mine? So I should quit my job and stay home and wait for you to come home from your job that has you jet setting all over the country all the time?" Spencer looks confused and says "what, no? That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying I make plenty of money and you don't have to work unless you really want to. I was just teasing about the other stuff. I'm sorry if it came out wrong. Your work is just as important as mine." I nod and give a quiet "thank you" in return before getting out of bed to get ready for work. I go to brush my teeth and Spencer follows shortly after. He slowly walks in behind me and wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me tight against him. He gives a soft kiss to my temple and says "I really am sorry. I didn't mean it to come out that way. I don't want to start the day off fighting, Annie." I continue brushing my teeth and eventually spit my toothpaste out, rinse my mouth and dry it off before turning to face Spencer and wrapping him in an embrace. "You're forgiven, Spencer. I don't want to fight either. I'm sorry I over reacted and jumped to conclusions so quickly." I say while still holding him. Spencer shakes his head "what I said isn't okay, and I truly am sorry." I shake my head and say "you do save lives, but I enhance them." He smiles softly and pushes some hair out of my face. "That's a good way of putting it. Both jobs are equally important." I nod and smile before walking away. "Now let me get ready for work, baby. Can you take Ryder out for me?" He hums an affirmative response and goes to put some more clothes on before taking Ryder out. I wash my face and do my skin care routine before tackling my hair. I just brush out my hair, put some dry shampoo in it, and put it in a pony tail before going to my vanity. I just dab on some concealer and mascara and blush and apply some tinted chapstick. I opt for glasses today because I don't feel like dealing with contacts. I put my scrubs and tennis shoes on and apply deodorant before getting my stuff together to get ready to leave. I'm fixing my coffee and toasting a bagel to eat on the way to work when Spencer comes back in with Ryder after taking him outside. Once Spencer sees me in my scrubs he lets out a low whistle and says "you're sure I can't convince you to stay? You know what those scrubs do to me." I chuckle and tell him "Spence, I can't help that my work uniform makes you horny. I really can't be late for work so it'll have to wait until after, okay?" He pouts in disappointment. I laugh "quit pouting, bubs. You know if it was up to me I'd say yes and let you bang me seven ways to Sunday, but I have to go to work. So that will have to wait, I'm sorry." He laughs a bit at my choice of words and it makes me happy that I got rid of his pout. I lean down and pet Ryder, telling him goodbye before I leave. Then I lean up on my tiptoes and plant a kiss on Spencer's lips before grabbing my coffee, bagel, and bag and head out the door. I say "I love you, have a good day!" on my way out. My drive to work is completely uneventful, for which I'm grateful. I make my way into my office and settle in for the day as I get my patient charts together and everything prepped for the day. As I'm working on an updated plan of care for January for one of my patients, there's a knock on my door frame. Killian is standing there looking nervous. I give her a concerned look and ask "hey, what's up, Kil?" She's playing with her hands and comes to sit in one of the chairs in front of my desk after shutting the door. She says "Aaron wants me to come with him to JJ and Will's party tomorrow night." I look at her and say "okay, you came to the Christmas party the other night and that's much more formal than JJ's house. I don't understand why you're so nervous for a pajama party?" She nods but doesn't say anything. I wait in silence for a minute, trying to give her the time and space to say what she came to say. "This is just moving so fast and I'm scared. I've never been in a relationship like this. I mean he has a kid!" I furrow my brow "Killian you were amazing with Jack the other night and I can see how much you love him. How much you love both of them. You seemed so comfortable the other night. Where is this coming from?" She looks up at me and says "I...I think I'm pregnant." My eyes widen at the statement. "I thought you had an IUD?" She nods and says "yes I did, but I had to get it taken out to get it replaced. I was just going to get a new one inserted right after getting the old one out, but I had so much pain from a complication with the removal she advised me to wait to get a new one put in. I hadn't told Aaron and when he got in from a case a few days later I completely forgot and I'm sure you can figure out what happened from there." I give her an understanding nod. "Have you taken a test?" She shakes her head no. "What symptoms do you have?" She sighs before answering. "I mean my periods have been irregular and almost nonexistent since I got the IUD so if I were late I wouldn't know it. I've been really hormonal lately, I have been nauseous, and I've been having some weird cravings." I nod and say "Killian that could possibly be your body and hormones just adjusting to the removal of the IUD. The hormone imbalances and stuff especially after having the same one for years. It could just be a big coincidence." She mumbles something incoherent in response. I ask her "when you take the test, do you want it to be positive or negative?" She looks up at me and says "I honestly don't know. I love Aaron and would love to have a baby with him, but it hasn't even been 6 months yet." I nod in understanding. I tell her "I never told y'all this but I had a pregnancy scare with Spencer in October. I skipped an entire period and everything, but two tests came back negative. I got an IUD after that so I wouldn't have to worry about that again." She looks at me, intently listening. She asks "did you tell Spencer about the scare?" I nod and say "yes, I waited for him to get home from a case to tell him and then took the tests after I told him. He was very sweet and supportive. I highly highly doubt Aaron would be anything less than excited about it, Killian." She asks "do you think so?" I laugh slightly and ask her "Killian, is that what you're so afraid of? Telling Hotch?" She nods and a tear runs down her cheek. I immediately get up to sit next to her and pull her into a hug. I say "I know Hotch can be intimidating, but I figured you would be he his Achilles heel." She just shrugs and says "we have a very egalitarian relationship. I mean we are both switches so we just switch roles back and forth in the bedroom when necessary so who's the more dominant one isn't constant at all in all aspects of our relationship. He's never hurt me. I don't think he would ever lay a hand on me or Jack." I nod and rub her back. "Do you love him?" I ask her softly. She nods her head without hesitation "it's terrifying how much I love both him and Jack." I nod and smile "that's a good thing." She says "I just wanted more time with just the two of us, plus Jack I guess, before having a baby." I nod "Spencer and I have had a similar conversation. Sometimes we wish the scare hadn't been a scare at all, but we both want time together without a baby first so I get that." Suddenly there's a knock on the door and I tell them to come in, fully expecting Alison. My suspicions were correct as she comes in holding a patient chart. She's about to say something until she notices Killian's presence and tear streaked face. She shuts the door behind her and asks "Killian, what's wrong, honey?" She just looks at me and then back at Alison before saying "I think I'm pregnant." Alison looks very confused. She asks "does Aaron know?" I whip my head at her "how long have you known?" Alison shrugs "since it began. She didn't want to upset you or get your hopes up because it was just a friends with benefits situation at first." My facial expression softens and I nod in understanding. Alison asks "have you taken a test yet?" She shakes her head no. I look at her and say "how about we all take one in solidarity so it's less scary." Alison says "yeah I'm down with that." Killian nods but doesn't say anything. I tell her "go back to work, get your mind off of it, and on my lunch I'll get us some pregnancy tests and we can take them this afternoon. No matter what happens it is all going to be okay." She sniffles and nods before thanking me and heading out the door without another word. Alison gives me a sad look and says "I hate seeing her like that. Aaron would probably love to have another baby." I nod "I know. He's a great dad."

•••••

On my lunch break I run across the street to Walgreens and buy a few pregnancy tests. I get back to the hospital and I'm about to heat up one of the frozen meals I keep in my mini fridge in the office when there's a knock at the door. I say "come in," expecting Alison to come in with her lunch. Instead Spencer opens the door and walks in. My face lights up with excitement as I get up to walk around my desk and into his arms. He smiles back brightly and says "hey, I thought I would surprise you and take you to lunch if you were available." I smile and give him a quick kiss. "How sweet, let me get my purse and we can go." Spencer nods as I go to get my stuff together. It takes all of two seconds for Spencer to notice the not concealed at all bag from Walgreens with multiple pregnancy tests. I've forgotten all about it when he steps forward and looks inside of it. His face turns white and he looks at me in shock. He says "Annie, what is this?" I sigh and say "I don't know, 187, what does it look like?" as I go to shut the door, fully expecting him to panic. He stutters for a second before saying "you have the IUD you shouldn't need these!" I chuckle and nod "it's not for me, Spence." I watch as he visibly deflates with relief at my explanation. I say "Killian thinks she's pregnant with Hotch's baby so Alison and I are taking tests, too, in solidarity." Spencer's eyes go wide again "so one is for you." I shrug and say "I guess technically, but I fully expect it to be negative. I will call you as soon as I take it with the results if you want. I'll even FaceTime you if you want." He nods and chooses to drop the subject now that he knows I'm not experiencing any symptoms or anything. I pick up my purse and ask him "ready?" He nods, still looking a bit shaken from the panic attack he just gave himself. I take his hand and we walk out the door. I lock my office behind me because it has private patient information inside of it. He asks as we are walking to the front entrance of the hospital "any requests or cravings?" I hum and think for a minute. I tell him "I think I'm okay with anything. Why don't we pick a place that's within walking distance?" Spencer nods and says "I think I know a good place." I smile and tell him to lead the way. As we are walking he tells me about his very mundane morning with Ryder. He did manage to get some paperwork done he says, but he still feels like he should be doing something more useful than he is. I hum and say "even superheroes deserve breaks and vacations, bubs. You don't have to be useful all the time to be worthy of anything, especially love and happiness." Spencer gives me a soft smile and nods while he squeezes my hand. We make our way to a Greek restaurant I've never noticed before. It's called "Ambrosia Taverna." I'm starting to get excited because I love Greek food. I ask Spencer "how have I never heard of or seen this place?" He chuckles "I didn't know about it until Emily brought me here after a case one time. She lived in Europe for a lot of her childhood and she really enjoyed greek food while she was there. She said this is one of the most authentic places she's found in DC." I nod in understanding. It doesn't look very fancy, honestly it doesn't look like much. It looks like any old diner with booths and tables but there's some Greek decor and Greek music playing. We seat ourselves and a middle aged Greek man came and handed us menus and asked what we wanted for drink. Spencer ordered water for himself and diet Coke for me. Honestly at this point I don't even know why I bother looking at the menu. I look throughout the menu and eventually decide on a grilled chicken wrap with lettuce, tomato, cucumbers, pickled onion, cilantro, and sriracha mayo. Spencer asks what I want but I decide to order for myself so I tell him I'm still looking. A few minutes later the Greek man comes back with our drinks and asks if we are ready to order. Before Spencer can decline I ask "can I have this grilled chicken and sriracha mayo wrap but can I have it in a bowl instead of on a wrap? With extra sauce on the side?" The man nods and is very nice about my request. Spencer gives me an odd look and then orders himself a lamb gyro. The man takes our order and our menus back to the kitchen. Spencer is still looking at me weird so I ask "what?" He says "I thought you didn't know what you wanted? And also since when do you turn down carbs?" I chuckle nervously and say "I wanted to order for myself this time and I also need to lose some of this holiday weight I gained. I feel absolutely huge." Spencer's expression turns soft as he says "Annie, you are not huge. And cutting out food groups isn't the best way to lose weight. You are a very healthy weight and shouldn't be concerned about gaining weight over the holidays. That also means you enjoyed yourself. There's nothing wrong with indulgence every once in a while." I nod and say "thank you for that, Spence, I'll just feel better about myself if I cut back on the carbs for the next week or so. I feel super bloated right now and carbs won't help." Spencer hums and doesn't say anything. I chuckle and ask "what?" Again. He just shrugs and says "I think you're beautiful exactly how you are. Gaining a little weight means nothing and you still look absolutely gorgeous at all times." I start really blushing and laugh as I say "Spence, stop." He gives me a stern look and says "I will not stop complimenting you daily until you believe it yourself." My heart flutters at that. I decide to change the subject. "Anyway, so have you moved all your stuff over to my place yet?" He does his hand in a wavy motion face down to say yes and no. He continues "after lunch Morgan and I are going to meet at my old place and pack up the last few things. Tomorrow I will drop the key off and then you are officially stuck with me for a year." I smile and say "happily stuck with you for a year. I mean we've practically been living together since September. Now we are just going to save a lot of money by not paying two rents." Spencer nods "this is also true." Soon after, our food arrives and we enjoy it immensely. I ask Spencer "oh my god, why haven't you taken me here before?" He chuckles and says "I didn't think of it until you said you wanted to be in walking distance of the hospital." I hum and say "you'll have to come on my lunch breaks much more often so we have more excuses to eat here." He chuckles and nods "duly noted." We finish up our food. I eat about three quarters of mine before I get full. I was sure to eat all the chicken and the sriracha Mayo was especially good. Spencer eyes my plate but doesn't say anything. Spencer pays the bill, I've learned not to fight it any more at least not in public, and we head out. We walk hand in hand back to the hotel, very happy and satiated from our meal. I don't have anything on the schedule until 1:15 and it's 12:45 now as we walk into the hospital. As I'm checking my watch Spencer asks "are you running late for something?" I shake my head "no I actually have quite a long lunch break today. I don't have anything for another 30 minutes." Spencer nods as we walk towards my office. At some point while we are walking he quickly pulls me down a different hallway. He comes to a room and knocks on the door. Hearing nothing, he opens it. I realize now that it's an on call room. Spencer pulls me in and locks the door behind me. I giggle and say "Spencer this is for doctors!" He gives me a sly grin and says "I am a doctor." I roll my eyes and he quickly pulls me to him and says "don't make me punish you right now. You still have to get punished for your disobedience at the party, but I'm not planning on doing that here." I bite my lip and nod. He says sternly what do you say "I'm sorry, sir." He nods and then quickly takes my purse and throws it to the side. In rapid succession he also removes my top and my bra and unties my scrubs, lightly pushing them so they fall to my ankles. I kick off my shoes and socks and start giggling now only in my underwear. Spencer starts unbuttoning his shirt and I help him, pushing it off his shoulders. He undoes his belt and let's his pants fall to the ground. He also kicks off his shoes and socks. He gently pushes me to lay down on one of the small beds in the on call room. He hovers above me and starts kissing my hungrily. I wrap my arms around his neck and thread my fingers in his hair, tugging lightly. He trails his hands down to my underwear. I slowly feel myself getting wetter as he rubs side to side on my clit. My breathing becomes labored and I don't contribute much to the kiss as he continues his movements. I feel myself becoming embarrassingly close so fast before he pulls away from me and moves down the bed. He quickly yanks off my underwear and settles between my legs. I bite my lip with anticipation at what I know is coming. Spencer wastes no time building the anticipation he just dives right into my folds, lapping like a man starved. I let out a high pitched gasp in surprise. Spencer gives me a look of warning to not be too loud. I nod and bite my lip so I won't alert anybody walking by to the activities taking place. He wraps his arms around my hips and pulls me further down the bed so he can use a different angle. The sensations are heavenly. I cry out "Spencer, please, can I come?" He adds his right hand to my clit and nods, giving me permission without removing his mouth from me. The added stimulation sends me tumbling over the edge and I tug lightly on his hair. He groans in response, causing more vibrations to ripple through me. I jerk at the sensation and he finally removes his hand and mouth. I'm shaking after that and Spencer smiles down at me with pride, in himself or me I'm not sure. After I get my breathing under control I ask him "time?" He checks his watch that, in our haste, he never removed and says "it's 12:56." I nod and smile. "You're finally getting what you wanted this morning, Dr. Reid." He furrows his brow "I don't want you to be late, Annie." I hum and say "get us both there quick and I won't be." He chuckles darkly and moves to hover above me, lining up at my entrance. He asks "ready?" I nod and he pushes in, slowly at first, but he quickly picks up the pace. He covers my mouth with his hand when I start to moan too loudly. His pace is now at a bruising speed. He moves my hand to cover my mouth and gives me a stern look before taking the hand that was covering my mouth to my clit and rubbing fast tight circles. My eyes roll back into my head as I fall over the edge with no warning and Spencer follows suit as soon as my orgasm causes me to contract around him. He groans as he shoots warm ropes of cum into me. Spencer sighs in pleasure before he pulls out of me and I have a blissful smile on my face. Spencer has a look of realization but I don't know about what. He turns to me and says "I don't have anything to clean you up with but Kleenex." I nod and reach my hand out for the box of Kleenex that was on the table by the door. I quickly use a couple to dry off my inner thighs and run it over my folds before I pick my underwear off the floor and put them on. Spencer looks at me and says "you have no idea how hot that is?" I chuckle "me putting on my underwear?" He shakes his head and says "no, knowing that you're going to have my cum inside of you for the rest of your day at work. God that's so hot." I chuckle and think to myself that it really is just the little things sometimes. I finish getting dressed and realize it's 1:06. I tell Spencer "I love you, baby, but I gotta get back to work." He nods as he continues getting dressed. I quickly walk out of the on call room and come face to face with Alison and Killian. Alison says "hey we were looking for you! It's not like you to leave on lunch without telling us. And why were you just in an on call room?" I try to think of an answer and say "uhh I was just tired so I decided to nap for some of my lunch break after I picked up the tests." They nod and I think they've bought it when I hear the door open again and know it can only be one person. I see Killian's and Alison's eyes both get wide and they start nudging each other and give each other weird faces. I turn to look at Spencer and he makes eye contact with me, his eyes just say "sorry." I laugh when I realize his hair is all kinds of messy and his buttons are out of order on his shirt. I decide that the jig is up and just walk back over to Spencer smiling and go to fix his buttons and his hair. He gives me a soft apologetic smile in return. I smile and lean up on my tip toes to give him a kiss to assure him I'm not mad. I say to the girls "okay, let's hear it." Killian just goes "talk about wham bam thank you ma'am!" And they both bust out laughing. Spencer and I start laughing a couple seconds after they do and we all share a good laugh. I look at the two of them and say "you can make fun of me for this all you want but make sure none of the higher ups find out." They both look at each other before Alison says "oh honey we've all done that. Don't worry about it." I give a shocked look and ask "really?" They both nod "we were just more discrete." I scoff "we would've been more discrete if y'all weren't right outside the door!" They laugh and nod. Alison says "hey we have that evaluation in a couple minutes we have to go." I nod and kiss Spencer goodbye before following Alison back to my office to get myself back together and get my stuff.

•••••

Alison and I finish our eval and make our way back to our offices to document everything. After about 30 minutes Killian comes and knocks on my door frame. She asks "you guys ready?" I nod and look at Alison who is working next to me on her documentation of the eval. Alison smiles and nods. We all get up, discreetly transporting the pregnancy tests in my therapy bag. We go to a private bathroom reserved for staff only. We had previously grabbed disposable cups to make the tests easier on us. The toilet is in a room separate from the sink so we quickly take turns peeing in our cups. As soon as we pee we stick the test in the cup and cover it before letting the next person go. Killian went first, then me, then Alison. There's about a minute between the timers going off after the recommended 3 minutes of development time for the test. Killian's goes off first. She looks at us with a terrified face. We give her reassuring smiles and rub her arm or her back and nod for her to look. She picks the test up and turns it over, revealing it to be negative. She lets out the biggest sigh of relief I've ever heard. Alison and I chuckle at her relief and I ask "you're not even a little bit disappointed at the results?" She sighs and shrugs "I want a baby, just not now. Definitely not now. Jack is enough for now." Alison and I nod, completely understanding. My timer goes off and I flip my test over without hesitation. Mine is also negative, which I expected. There wasn't much anticipation or anything because we all know I have an IUD. We talk about different things as we wait for Alison's timer to go off. Alison nonchalantly turns hers over, revealing that it's positive. Alison's jaw drops and Killian and I start freaking out. She covers her mouth with her hands as tears fill her eyes. I ask Alison "oh my god, have y'all been trying?" She shrugs. "I mean we weren't actively preventing it. I was convinced I was infertile because we tried for years with no luck." Alison had mentioned before she and Luke had struggled with getting pregnant, but decided to take a break from trying as it was putting strain on their relationship. I rub her back excitedly "so we are excited about this yeah?" She nods, still with tears in her eyes "I mean utterly shocked and surprised but yeah definitely excited." Killian and I smile with her as we hug. I have tears spilling too by the end of the hug because of how happy I am for my friend. When we pull back I see that Killian's eyes are red rimmed, too. Killian doesn't like to cry so she quickly excuses herself and says "well I'm going to go call my gyno and schedule an appointment to get this shit figured out. I am not a fan of all this hormonal crap." Alison and I laugh at Killian just being herself. I smile at her and ask "so how are you going to tell Luke." She smiles brightly to herself and says "I think I'm just going to go home and tell him. Do you think I can head out early? It's his day off." I check my watch and see that it's 4:15. I tell her "oh for sure just tell Michelle that you have something personal going on and need to head out early. I'm sure she will understand and not ask too many questions." Alison nods and gives me a hug "thank you for suggesting the solidarity tests, otherwise I never would've checked until I had more symptoms." I smile and nod to her. Before she leaves she says "please don't mention it to anybody, though. It's so early and I'm so afraid of having a miscarriage with how much difficulty we've had in the past." I nod "of course. I'll be sure to tell Killian, too. Now go! Tell Luke!" She smiles giddily and runs off. I'm left in the bathroom alone and look at my lone negative pregnancy test, part of me wishing it had been positive. I know it's ridiculous, I mean I requested the IUD and all of that. I knew what I was doing. Part of me wants a baby, but part of me wants to be wrapped up with Spencer just the two of us forever. I wipe a lone straggler tear and decide to FaceTime Spencer. He answers on the second ring. When he answers I recognize the walls of the bathroom of his soon to be old apartment. He looks nervous but excited as he says "hey, Annie, what's up?" I smile and say hello before I flip the camera around and reveal my negative pregnancy test. I see Spencer breathe out a sigh of relief as I giggle at his reaction. I ask him "Spencer, are you going to be this scared of a positive result when we actually want a baby?" Spencer chuckles and shakes his head and also shrugs his shoulders. He says "I mean it's terrifying because you can never be fully prepared for a baby no matter what you do. If you were pregnant now I'd be excited, but we should enjoy not having kids while we can so we can travel and explore." I nod and say "so what you're saying is Ryder doesn't count as our kid yet?" Spencer chuckles "you can't board a kid and especially not for as cheap as you did while we were gone for Christmas." I giggle and nod in agreement. "I better go finish up documenting this eval and then I'll head home. I love you, be safe moving stuff." He gives me a warm smile and says "I love you, see you at home!" We end the call and I feel butterflies in my chest at the fact that we really will be seeing each other at home now that he will be turning in his key to the apartment tomorrow.