Chapter 62

I look around the hospital while bringing a bouquet of flowers. I don't know why Mike wants me to meet here. Maybe he wants to talk to me. But in hospital? Really?

"Hey.." Mike smiles at me.

"Hi." I smile back at him. "So why are we here?"

"Val wants to talk to you." Mike says to me.

"Why is that?" I ask him.

"I don't know." Mike shrugs. "Come here." Mike walks lead me.

I walk behind Mike. Until we get into cancer unit? I frown and keep walking following Mike. Until Mike open a door and a curtain and I see Val is laying down on bed and with pipe on her chest, nose and head. She even doesn't have hair anymore. She is completely bald, skinny, and look so pale.

"Why? I look like a monster?" She chuckles.

"No. No. It's, what happened?" I frown at her.

"I have leukemia. My hair started to fell down because of the chemotherapy but my condition still remain the same even it's become worse. And I tried to accept everything that's written for me." She smiles at me.

"I'll leave you two alone." Mike says to us and walks out.

I take a chair and put the flowers on the side table. "I don't know which flower that you like but since I love lilies so I got you lilies." I giggle and sit down on that chair.

"Thank you." She smiles at me. "I heard from Mike that you learned a lot to babysit Logan."

"Yeah well, there are four people who lives in that apartment and I'm the only one who didn't have a job and Mike usually left Logan with me so I'm willing to learn. But I swear I never give him ice cream." I giggle.

"Logan is not a fussy baby. Since he was born he reminds me of Mike a lot. But Mike said that Logan reminds him more to you than me." She chuckles.

"I don't have any Asian eyes." I chuckle.

"Paris, why don't you want to be with Mike?" She asks me.

"Because I don't want Logan hates me. Separating his parents away. My parents divorced and I really hated this one woman who made move on my dad and made my mom's anxiety getting worse and then they got divorced. I don't want the same thing happened to Logan. So I better back off." I said to her.

"Do you love him?" She asks me. I look at her and nodded slowly. "Then be with him. Take my place."

"But you're dating him." I shake my head.

"We both know this isn't right. We pretend to date only in front of my parents. Because they're still think that I should marry him because I have kid with him. But I know my life is not gonna long. So someday if I leave, I want you to take my part." She said to me.

"What do you mean?" I raise my eyebrows.

"Be with Mike, be a mother figure for Logan. Apparently I can't do much now. Mike do all the parenthood things alone but I want you both to take part of it. Please." She holds my hand.

I can feel her hand is as cold as ice and it's just like bone that covered up with skin. "But I'm still a baby." I said to her.

"Do you think I was ready to be a mother? No. I wanted to give him up but I changed my mind at the first time I saw his face after he was born. There's no one can be a perfect mom for Logan except you. You're willing to learn to do those things. And someday when Mike and you will get married, you will adopt him." She smiles at me.

"You're gonna cure." I said to her.

"I hope so but I can't see what's tomorrow gonna looks like." She sighs. "Please, when my time is over, promise me that you can be the best mother for Logan." She rubs my hand.

I nod and wrap her hand. "I promise." I smile at her.

I rub her hand and smile at her. She just smiles back at me and suddenly her eyes closed. I could feel her hand is as cold as ice. Suddenly the machine that detected her heart beat become just full lines.

"Val?" I called her and feel her pulse but I don't feel anything. I walk out from her room quickly and look around. "Doctor!" I shout.

"What happened?" Mike asks me.

"I don't know she just closed her eyes and I can't feel her pulse." I said to Mike panicky.

The doctor and the nurse walk in. I'm standing in front of her room and hold my hand. The doctor walks out and shakes his head.

"I'm so sorry for your lost." The doctor says to us.

"Oh God!" I shake my head and cover my mouth with my hand as tears slowly fall down to my eyes. "I can feel her hand was cold as ice." I cry.

Mike grabs my body and hugs me. I hug him back and cry in his hug. I can't believe that talking to me was the last thing that she wanted. And she wanted me to be a mother for Logan.

~~

I lean my head on the couch and hug a pillow. Dad sits down next to me and give me a glass of water. I take the glass and sip the water.

"I'm still can't believe that talking to me was the last thing she wanted." I shake my head.

"Why you didn't want to come to Montauk?" Dad asks me.

"Because I hate funeral. First was Nana then her. She was dying while holding my hand, dad. I could feel her cold hand in my hand." I sigh.

"What did you two talked about?" Dad rubs my hair.

"She wanted me to promise her that I could be a mother figure for Logan. And I promise her. Now I don't know what should I do. I mean Logan went to Montauk with Mike and I'd rather to be here. See? I can't be a good mother." I shake my head.

"Do you remember when you were kid you have this baby stroller toy that you carry around with you and this baby doll. You act like a mother, change the diaper, wiping, feeding and all." Dad says to me.

"It was a doll, daddy. Logan is human baby." I roll my eyes.

"I know. I know." Dad sighs.

Suddenly someone opens the door. I turn my face to the door and see Mercedes and Sam walk in. "Hey, we just heard. How are you?" Sam asks me.

"Still unbelievable." I sigh.

"Where is Mike?" Mercedes asks me.

"Mike went to Montauk and taking Logan. He will be back after funeral and all." I said to her and sip my water.

"You will figure something out later." Dad says to me.

"You know what? Two days ago, I sang Yellow for Logan's lullaby and he fell asleep right away." I chuckle.

"Just like you." Dad smiles at me and rubs my hair. "Do you remember when I told you the thing that happened to me after I brought you home from the hospital?" Dad asks me.

"Yeah." I nod.

"Yes I was so scared and have no confidence about being a father but in the middle of the night, you just cried and cried, then I hold you and you stopped crying grabbed my finger with your whole fist. I sang you Isn't She Lovely and you fell asleep right away." Dad smiles at me. "You will get that moment too. Nobody knows how to be a parents. It's naturally comes to your sense." Dad says to me.

"I got that." I nod at him.

"Alright, I have to go back to hotel and prepare for tomorrow meeting. You got your friends here right so I can go." Dad kisses my head and gets up. "See you tomorrow." Dad says to me and walks out from my apartment.

I let out a sigh and put the pillow on my lap. Suddenly Brownie jumps onto my lap. I smile and rub his fat belly. I pick him up and walk to my bedroom then lay down on my bed.

"You alright?" Sam walks in and sits down on his bed.

"Yes I'm okay. Just still mourning and nervous." I sigh and hug Brownie.

"Why nervous?" Sam asks me.

"She wanted me to take care of Logan and raise him with Mike. I mean I'm still a baby and I don't know how to do that. I even never imagine myself to be 19 and have a kid." I said to him.

"Nobody's imagine to be at such this age to have kid. Or maybe you can talk to Mike and give it up to someone else who are mature enough." Sam says to me.

"Neither Val nor Mike wants that. And honestly, I don't want to give him up too." I half smiled.

"Just enjoy it. Being parents is like adopting a pet. You don't know what to do at first but it naturally comes." Sam smiles at me.

"Thank you, Sam." I smile back at him.

Sam gets up and walks out from our room. I keep hugging Brownie and cuddling him while laying down on the bed. Suddenly someone open the door. I turn my face and Alex walks in bring a family size of ice cream bucket.

"Hey.." Alex smiles at me and sits down on the edge of my bed. "I just got your text and it's shocking."

"Yeah it is." I nod and sit up. "I think I'm going to be sick." I sigh.

Alex rubs my hair and open the ice cream cover. He shows me two spoons and grins at me. "Before you get sick you have to taste the delicious of Cookies and Cream Ice Cream from Haagen Dazs." Alex smiles at me.

"Alex.." I chuckle.

"Open your mouth." Alex raises his eyebrows and feeds me the ice cream.

I smile at him and eat the ice cream. I put Brownie on my bed and take the ice cream bucket from Alex and eats it more.

"I'm hungry." I giggle.

"I can order McDonald's for you." Alex smiles at me.

"Are you trying to make me fat?" I raise my eyebrows at him.

"I just want to make you feel better, sweetie." Alex rubs my head.

"Thank you." I smile at him and peck on his lip.

"Anything for you." Alex peck on my lips back.

I smile at him and continue eating the ice cream. I show my spoon to him and feed him the ice cream. I know I'm not in love with him yet. But I like him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm walking on the street while holding Brownie's leash as he walks down in front of me. Today dad is going back to Ohio and now me and Brownie are going to meet him in LAX airport.

I pick Brownie up and hold him as we enter LAX airport. I look around until Brownie barks at some part. I look at him and he is barking to where dad is standing.

I smile and keep holding him then walk to dad. "Hey.." I smile at dad.

"Hey, I'm waiting for the committee." Dad says to me. "You brought Brownie here."

"Yeah he needs to do physical work." I chuckle.

"Principal Schuester, everything is ready." A guy come to us.

"Alright, I'm going home." Dad smiles at me. "You, take care of yourself, don't forget to eat, don't think too much, and come home on Thanksgiving."

"I'm gonna miss you." I hug him.

"I'm gonna miss you too. Come home on Thanksgiving." Dad says to me and hugs me back. "Alright, the plane is waiting. Take care and remember that everything is gonna be alright." Dad kisses my head.

I smile and him and nod. "Bye bye daddy." I wave Brownie hand.

Dad chuckles and rubs Brownie's body. "Bye you two." Dad waves us a goodbye and walks away.

I keep standing and see him walking away to the check in gate. I turn my face at Brownie and hug him. "Yeah we will come home on Thanksgiving. You miss mom and Maddox too right? Come on, we go back to the apartment now." I smile at Brownie and hold him.

I walk to Starbucks counter to buy ice latte. "Hey there is mommy and Brownie."

I turn my face and see Mike is carrying Logan with baby carrier and smiles at me with his parents behind him. "Don't call me mommy." I shake my head. "You want coffee?" I ask him.

"No." Mike shakes his head.

"Hey, Mr. Chang and Mrs. Chang." I smile at his parents.

"Hey, how are you? Your mom said that your dad is in Los Angeles." Mrs. Chang smiles back at me.

"Yeah dad just got into his plane to flight back home." I giggle. "You guys want coffee?" I ask them.

"No, we are not supposed to drink too much coffee." Mrs. Chang shakes her head and smile at me.

"Alright." I giggle and pay for my ice latte.

"A mother shouldn't drink a coffee in front of her son." Mike simply said.

"Mike, do you want me to kick your ass?" I pout at him.

Mike chuckles and pulls me closer to him and kisses my head. I smile at him and put Brownie on the ground and take Logan from the baby carrier and hold him.

"Hi. Why are you wearing your beanie hat so low?" I smile at him and pull up his beanie hat. "What happen with his forehead?" I ask Mike as there is scratch on Logan's forehead.

"Pulling himself up from the hotel bed." Mike sighs and put Brownie on Logan's stroller.

"Aww.." I kiss Logan's cheek.

Logan leans his head on my shoulder. I smile and rub his back. We then walk out from the airport. "Alright, we are going back to the hotel, you two take care." Mrs. Chang says to us.

"Yes, mom." Mike nods.

I smile at them and watch them go to their taxi. Mike is continue pushing the stroller and his suitcase. I keep holding Logan and turn my face at him. He closes his head while leaning his head on my chest.

"Val wrote your name in her letter that she writes after Logan was born." Mike says to me.

"What does it said?" I turn my face at Mike.

"I will tell you later but it said that she doesn't want anyone else except you and me taking care of him." Mike says to me.

"Really?" I raise my eyebrows and half smiled.

"Yep." Mike nods.

We both keep walking on the street. I keep holding Logan and rub his back. I feel so bad that I used to kinda hate Val but I didn't know what is exactly happening to her.

Mike and I turn our way to our apartment building. We get to the elevator and get into our apartment. I walk to Mike's room and put Logan inside the crib and put blanket around him.

Mike put Brownie on the ground and vacuuming the stroller. I look at Logan and smile at him. I let out a sigh then sit down on Mike's bed and open his suitcases.

"Are these clean clothes or dirty clothes?" I ask Mike.

"Clean clothes. Don't worry I will unpack my stuff." Mike says to me.

"No, it's okay." I simply nod and put his clothes into the closet and arrange it.

I turn my face at Mike a bit and look at him. He is just sitting down on his bed and leaning his back against the wall and reading a book.

"Mike?" I walk to him and sit down next to him.

"Yes?" Mike turns his face at me.

"I want you to be honest with me. Even if you lie, you know that you can't lie to me right." I said to him and hold his hand. "Are you happy?"

"Why do you ask?" Mike asks me.

"Look, we've been together since sophomore year, okay. I had crush on you since freshmen year and I've seen you since I was sixteen. I knew you. I'm like the only one person who knows you better than anyone else even yourself. Look at you studying medicine like those is like looking a fish that can swim. Living with no passion." I said to him.

"What am I supposed to do? I have a responsibility now. I'm a father now. I need to start to thinking about his future not mine anymore." Mike says to me.

"I know you miss dancing. Your place is in USC School of Dance not School of Medicine. Mike, I want to see that smile from your face again. Everytime I saw you dance, that's the reason why I love you. You're that guy who doesn't talk too much, you are more like easy going person but when I see you dance, I see something special in you. I know that you're not okay and this is killing me." I shake my head and look down.

I sniffle and wipe my tears away. "Are you crying because thinking about me?" Mike cups my cheek and makes me look at him.

"I want to see the old Mike Chang, the one who I fall in love with. The one who doesn't talk too much but know all the answer of every questions I asked. The one who I always came when I was in bad place. The one who knows all my secrets. The one who wasn't only a boyfriend but also a best friend for me. I missed that, Mike. I didn't see those things since you decided to be a surgeon. And sometimes I wonder why God gives you a kid at this age when you're a good guy? I'm not blaming Logan, we can't blame him but the timing isn't right." I said to him.

"Paris, I'm happy." Mike holds my hand and smiles at me. "Just because I'm a surgeon doesn't mean that I can't dance. I'm signing up to teach homeless kids dance from a foundation and I want you to be my dance partner. Yeah I changed my main dream but my passion is still here. I can be fun entertain surgeon and when I have a surgery to do, instead of having panic attack, I could dance." Mike chuckles.

"I'm imagining you distract your patients with dancing." I laugh.

"Look, I love you very very much and no matter who you're dating, I know you will gonna end up marry me. Because we are end game." Mike holds my hand and smiles at me.

"Okay I have a confession to make." I giggle. "I actually don't know how to be a mother but I promise I'm willing to learn and help you with everything he needs. I will get a job and help you raise him financially and physically." I said to him.

"You don't have to get a job. You never work before." Mike chuckles.

"But I want to." I grin at him.

"Well.." Mike takes a letter from his suitcase and give it to me.

I take that letter and read it one by one. That's the letter that Val wrote with her handwriting. It said that she doesn't want all her relatives make decisions for her.

"She wanted me to take over her coffee shop?" I turn my face at Mike.

"Yup. She sold the one in Ohio so she could handle one here. It's a coffee shop like Starbucks. And since she got to hospital, I handled that coffee shop to help her. She got mad with all her family except her grandmother who passed away already." Mike says to me.

"Why is that?" I frown.

"Because they threw her away after they found out she was pregnant. She actually already found out about the cancer. The doctor already told her about the risk from labour that could happen to her but she doesn't want to get rid of it."

I keep reading the letter as tears slowly fall down to my face. "I can't believe that I ever hated this girl because she stole you from me." I shake my head.

"Hey.. hey.." Mike pulls me closer to him and hugs me. "She might be mean but she is just like Santana. Even though they both are mean but they both have beautiful heart." Mike rubs my back.

"How am I supposed to handle a coffee shop?" I ask him.

"I'll help you. You're not alone. We're in this together." Mike holds my hand.

"My life is suddenly changed. I'm not a college student anymore. I'm a mother now with five months old son." I said to him.

Mike chuckles. "I love seeing you freak out."

"Seriously that's not funny!" I glare at him.

"You're freak out and that's really cute." Mike laughs and cups my cheeks.

"Mike!" I pout. Mike laughs and suddenly kisses me. I shocked and pull his lips away slowly. "I'm dating Alex." I frown at him.

"You will marry me soon." Mike simply said and shrug.

I chuckle and get up then walk out from his room. I walk to my bedroom and put Brownie on his bed on the corner and lay down on my bed. I know it will be weird for me and Mike to raise a kid together but I'm willing to learn.

--------------------------------------------------------------