49

I wake up, my body felt a lot better and no bad dreams.

I guess I'm winning today already.

Maybe I shouldn't be to mad the Hadley's for making that appointment. They're not forgiven yet, just.. I'm mad at them a little less.

I sit up rubbing the sleep out of my eyes taking a deep breath. The sky was a sick gray color, a mix of freezing rain tapping at the windows. It gave some sort of peace staring at it.

I look at the clock reading 8:46 a.m I wonder how training was today? what they are working on, who's training 12 besides Vad? Regular training, are they getting along ok?

Cato must be in town training so I should be fine to go down stairs. I get up to go to my closet, opening up the doors to...nothing.

Didn't they bring my clothes back? Apparently not. All I have in my closet is the basket of blankets.

Maybe I'm not winning today.

I huff wrapping a blanket around me going downstairs. And of course, Cato was in fact down there.

In fact, today might kick my ass.

The downstairs was freezing, I shudder a little bit looking around for any bags with my things in.

" Morning." He says, I ignore him going by the door to see if there's any bags on the small bench around the corner.

" What are you looking for?" He asks.

I roll my eyes to myself, I guess I should talk to him he might know where it is. He maybe forgot he put it somewhere before I arrived.

" I'm looking for my clothes."

" What clothes?" He said.

Don't even tell me....

" My clothes. Any clothes? You seemed to already know I was suppose to come back here. None of my clothes is here I took it all remember?"

I look around the corner, he was looking at me with a ' well...crap' look. I let out a sigh leaning my head on the wall.

" I need to take a shower and I have NO clothes to change into."

" I'll let someone know you need clothes, but I don't know when they would get here." He says going to call some maids.

The clothes Ms.Hadley gave me yesterday was a sweat shirt and pants, but they're thin and I'm freezing right now.

I go make one hot chocolate before sitting on the chair wrapping the blanket around me tighter. Cato was on the phone when he turned looking at me as he was talking.

"...Yea, the sooner the better...thanks...bye." He ended the call watching me shiver, "Are you really that cold?" He asks.

" No... I'm sweating balls over here." I spit back annoyed.

He ignores my sarcasm taking off his sweatshirt throwing it at me. " Here, already prewarmed."

He seemed to throw it as hard as he could, it hit me in the face a small grunt escaping. He cologne filled my nose as I took it off my face. " I'm not taking your sweatshirt."

" Why?" He asks, " You act like you haven't worn my stuff before."

I was subconsciously rubbing my fingers on the material, already my hand had sweat from the shirt being so warm.

He turned doing whatever he was doing " Stop being difficult and put the stupid shirt on Kaylaya, I can see you shivering from over here."

I look at it one more time rolling my eye I put it on reluctantly. Much better. He turned again " Good girl." He says, knowing very well that'll rile me up, but his smile was a taunting as ever. I give him a glare but it doesn't faze him as he turns back around.

" Aren't you cold now?" I ask.

" When am I ever cold?"I put the hood up wrapping myself in the blanket again, this was so much better.

He made some bacon, serving me a plate. I was hungry, even if I wasn't he would still make me eat it so I guess to avoid bickering again I'll just need to eat it.

" Didn't you go to train this morning?" I ask.

He sits across from me," What does it look like?"

I rolled my eyes at the comment, " Then whose training them?"

" Enobaria and Brutus."

" And my kids?"

" Same ones.... And your little friend." He spoke bitterly.

I swear he's pettier then a teenage girl. I can't help my smirk shaking my head at his comment.

" What?" He asks annoyed.

" Nothing."

" What?" He pushes.

I look at him with the same aggravating smirk he always gives me, " You two are worse then teenage girls."

He crossed his arms," How?"

I tilted my head shrugging, my amusement growing," I just find it funny that you two used to be best friends and now you can't apparently stand eachother and seem to beat eachother up whenever you guys are in close proximity of eachother."

He picks at his bacon, " Me and Archer were best friends. He got added because he was his brother, and what kind of friends are they if they break bro code?"

I smile, chuckling "Bro Code? what did he break that was bro code?"

" You don't go after a girl that was claimed already." Cato states bluntly.

I  close my mouth blinking a couple times, Cato was dead serious to, to avoid awkwardness I an inside down smile," Maybe he just figured it was ok since it was just a bet thing.. not actually real."

I tried to sound as blank as possible. I don't know exactly where we stand, and given this weird circumstance it makes it all seem more confusing.

" Your still hung up on the bet?" He asks, his voice softened.

" No. That's in the past, I'm just saying possibly what he was thinking, I know you would do the same thing if you knew it was nothing."

" He knew it was something. We talked you know." Cato says, he sounds as serious as he's ever sounded looking at me right in the eye.

Oh.

I lift my chin a tad tilting my head in agreement "Huh...I guess he was a bad friend."

His face breaks in a small smile, " Now your finally understanding."

" I've always understood."

He hums in response, giving a face as he looks down.

" What does that mean?" I ask.

" Nothing." He says in a sarcastic tone.

I bite my lip..nope, I'm not starting anything.

" So what are we going today?" I try to get off the topic.

" Your looking at it." He says. " They said you needed to rest so that's exactly what your doing to do."

I guess a rest day would be nice. I nodded going back to the couch grabbing the blanket I was using before. " Game show channel? Or do you want the romance show on?" I ask.

He washed off the plates sitting on the other side of me on the end of the couch. " Whatever." He answered.

I was laying down, I tucked my legs so I wouldn't accidentally touch him. I try focusing on the TV but my mind wanders to our conversation we had just before.

He doesn't like Vad because he tried getting with me, which failed... he was so serious about it. Now, we aren't together because we fought about Vad and the deal thing...Which I need to address.

I chuckle.. Well, there's no way they can be friends anymore.

" What's so funny?" I hear Cato says, sleepily it seemed. He was resting his head in his hand now looking at me.

" Just thinking." I mean, I wasn't lying.

" About what?"

" Your sure like to worry about my business." I say trying to avoid the question.

" You say it like it's a bad thing."

I look at him with a face, " It kinda is sometimes."

" Just shows I care."

I adjust my body so he can't see my face, which is probably a frown.I mean, I guess he always did though he showed it differently.

I felt bad, I stuck a nerve when I said that, Was he doing all this just to prove it?

I slightly stretch my body from the feeling on uneasiness, not even thinking I set them of Cato's lap for a second. " Oh crap, sorry." I say quickly tucking my legs back in.

He rolls his eyes playfully, " Your fine."

We just sat there and watched whatever was on, it just felt so..normal. Being here, with him, in our house.

The sting came back making me sigh, I tried to focus on the screen but my body decided I wanted to sleep instead. Though the sleep was nice I didn't want to waste daylight sleeping all the time now.

But I couldn't help it. I guess my body is so exhausted it needs the extra sleep. Before I knew it I was out again.

I woke to me all sprawled out again, my legs on Cato's lap. Cato was half asleep too, he was halfway laying on the couch, making patterns on my leg.

I shift, He quickly takes his hands off of me leaving coldness where his hands were. " Are you hungry again?" Cato asks.

I laugh softly looking over at him," Are you trying to fatten me up?"

His smile comes back," I guess, kinda. You need to gain the doctor said. I'd be content with 10 pounds. It helps keep you healthier too."

" I really don't want anything. You gave me big portions."

" Fine, I'll let it go this time."

Avoxes came with a whole new wardrobe, " I didn't need all new things, I just needed my clothes back from my house." I say quietly to Cato.

He shrugs, " Victors only get the best."

" So you told them to get me all new clothes?"

He cocked his head to the side, " You act like I can't afford it."

I sat up, " You didn't have to-"

" I wanted to. Just shows I care." He says lightly looking over at the Avoxes, " First room on the right."

I watch them hurry up the stairs, passing clothes up. Then I look at Cato, which he has no idea I was doing since he was watching the Avoxes.

It did bug him.

And It's bugging me that I made him think he needed to prove it. I'm a horrible girlfriend.

Just kidding, we're not dating anymore. Horrible person.

I wanted to have that conversation after they leave.

" We need to talk once they leave." I say quietly, making him snap his head over to me. " About?" He asks nervously.

I look over his shoulder at an Avox, signaling they were done.

" Thank you." I say warmly which they return with a smile, along with the others.

I wait for them to walk out before turning to Cato, " Kay, it's just clothes don't think far into-"

I shake my head, " It's not about the clothes. But thank you, really."

He turned his body more towards me, " Then what?"

I open my mouth but nothing comes out, I just don't know what to say, or even how to say it.

He looks a little worried, " Kay.. Just say it."

" I want to say sorry." I blurted, that's the only thing I could think of.

He furrows his brows, " Sorry? For what, you didn't do anything."

" No I did. I did, I didn't believe you."

he stares at me for a second before he gets it. His face falling, before he could respond " When I stormed out of my house, when Zane followed me I asked. I told him he couldn't lie."

He readjusts, turning straight so he didn't need to directly look at me.

" He should win how my dad did, not bribing or making you do anything so he'll have his spot secured. I told him that, I'm sorry I wasn't here to help or listen. I'm sorry I blamed you."

He stayed quiet, but I waited. He leans forward resting his head in his hands, " Well I did it..so."

" To show that you cared? About him, though the more I'm actually starting to see him, the less I think he needs that care."

Cato didn't smile, nor was it a bad face. It was a line of understanding and amusement, mixed with just a little bit of sadness. He looked over briefly, " I think I'm going to take a shower." He doesn't wait for a response before he gets up.

Leaving me alone with my thoughts and guilt.

I think I really messed up.

I wasn't sure if he wanted to see me for the res of the day or not, I wouldn't. So I went to my room looking at the new clothes changing and taking a shower myself.

I just can't get over how much clothes he bought me.

I looked through everything, landing on a white crop and gray sweats throwing those on. By the time I was actually dressed and everything it was late.

And again I was tired, so I slept.

***

It was dark, totally black dark. So dark when your eyes are open they imagine shapes and hues of color that makes you close your eyes.

I felt the metal blade in  my hand as my body walked, I couldn't stop walking though I wanted to. I just wanted to stay in one place.

Then there was a cannon.

I jumped, then screams.

I heard my mother screaming, then my dad.

There was a flash of light, they were strung up blood covering them before it was pitch blackness again.

Then it was tributes.

Then Zane and Marie.

By this time I was sobbing yelling at the to stop.

" Kaylaya!"

Cato.

" Cato!" I yell back.

" Run!"

I couldn't.

The lights all came on to him being tortured, blood spilling out.

" Kaylaya! Kaylaya!"

***

I scream, my eyes jolting open. I back up stumbling back to my headboard.

" Kaylaya." Cato was making his way to my side, his eyes wide. He turns on the lamp next to me, " Hey, Hey..your ok. Your ok."

He kneels down to my level looking at me. The tears come full force, I basically jump in his arms sobbing.

" You were dying, everyone was dead..they were mocking me.. They were.." I stammer burying my face deep in his shoulder.

" I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere, it was just a dream."

I breathe franctically, before I feel a gush of serene. The shot.

My breathing slows all of a sudden, my limbs fall numb it seems practically falling off of Cato.

Which he somewhat catches me placing my back in my bed. " St-" I couldn't finish my sentence before I was out cold.

I woke up, this time to it being light out, I vaguely remember last night, just it was a bad dream and Cato came it.

That was it.

At this point I'm restless. I want to go do something, anything. I even want to clean the house, as long as I'm up doing.

Maybe I'll walk in the woods, that sounds like a plan.

I go down the stairs. " Morning." I say.

" Hey."

He always says morning. Not hey.

I look at him, he seems a little tense. " What's up?" I ask trying to sound normal.

' Nothing."

" Sure?" I ask eyeing him.

" I'm fine."

" Cato?"

He runs a hand through his hair, " Kaylaya, I'm fine."

I give him a knowing look but don't push it.

" Would it be fine if I had a party tonight?" He blurts.

Why is he asking me? I'm fine I need more faces to talk to.

" I would love to have a party, gives me something to do."

" Ok." He agrees his mood changing.

He gives me a smile before getting up to workout. " I'll come workout with you." I say straying to get up but Cato pushes me back down. " You can't yet."

" Why can't I?"

" Because, you need to rest."

" I'm sick of resting."

" I don't care."

" Fine, then I'm taking a walk."

" Your also not doing that."

I let out a sharp breath, " Why not? I'm sick of staying in here."

" Because Kaylaya, every time you wander, no one can find you. And in the woods, no way. I hate this stupid woods."

He hates it because of his games, it was woods. He needed to wander alone in the woods, out of his comfort zone with that thresh.

He was the only one that could kill Cato, physically. When Cato did kill him he used rage, without it I think it would've been a hard fight.

I don't push it, I don't want to fight so I roll my eyes turning.

" Don't roll your eyes at me." He states harshly.

" Want me to do it again?" I ask smartly.

" Don't."

I do it purposefully. What is he going to do?

" I'll throw you in the pond if you don't knock it off."

I smile Picking at my nails, " I mean you could, but that'll determine my attitude for the next couple hours. Your choice." I look up at him to see what his decision will be.

" Stay." He says before turning around.

" I'm not a dog!" I yell.

" I don't know your kinda acting like a bitch!" I hear him yell going down the stairs a little faster.

I grab an empty water bottle going to the stairs throwing it at his head which it hits. " See!" He yells picking it up about to throw it at me.

I let out a small giggle running out of arm shot, before peeking around the corner. The bottle just narrowly misses my nose.

" Cato!"

I hear him laugh before he goes fully down the stairs to workout.

What an ass.

I went back on the couch, smiling to myself like an idiot.

Well that did set my mood for today, if he wants to be stupid, I'll play into it.

So again I say and watched TV, this time turning on the hunger game channel.

Chaff won this year.

I had a hot flash come over me, making me feel irritated. I kicked of the blanket I was wrapped in lying on my side.

Soon Cato came back up, I hear him making his way to the refrigerator before I hear the sound of a can or some gushing sound.

I look over to him eating whipped cream.

" You know you just gained back all the calories you just worked off right?"

He looks over with his mouth full shrugging, coming over to me. " Want some?"

" No." I state bluntly.

He pauses, " Why are you so red?" He puts his hand on my forehead, bascially hitting it with the force he had.

" OWW.." I whine giving him a dirty look.

" Do you feel ok? Your warm."

" No. I'm hot."

He opens up the windows letting the air in making me shiver slightly.

He still watched me, " Do you remember last night?" He asks.

" Not really. Just that I had a bad dream and you were in my room."

He nods slowly, " I thought it was supposed to stop you from freaking out, then you just passed out."

" Sorry." I mumble bitterly, not like I wanted to do any of that.

" No..No. That's not what I meant." He looks over at the clock. " I need to go into town to eat some things. I'll have Enobaria stay with you."

" I don't need a baby sitter."

" To make sure your alright."

I slam my hand on the sofa, " I don't.." I trailed off sighing in defeat.

That just showed otherwise.

" I'm calling her. Go take a cool shower to clam down." With that he was gone again.

I go take a shower, I need this release tonight. Just to have fun and back to lounging around doing nothing..

I throw on a black crop top and sweats brushing out my hair.

I hear talking downstairs so I decided to go down stairs.

" How are you two?" Enobaria asks.

I stop in the loft near the stairs, I can see them but they can't see me.

" Fine." Cato says.

" Getting along ok?"

" Yea, she's been opening up a little more. Sometimes she gets weird."

What does he mean I get weird?

Luckily Enobaria didn't understand either so she asked what I was thinking.

" Weird?" She asks.

" I mean, that one day I went to grab her plate and I brushed her hand and she completely dropped it. She avoids touch at all cost, like she's scared of me or she gets nervous or something I don't know. I don't think I did anything."

" She's fighting her own body Cato. You do realize you two were a couple? And her now living here... yea I bet she feels different. You two were basically married."

There was a long silence, I was waiting for Cato to say something, anything regarding what Enobaria just said.

But he doesn't.

" I'll see you two later... Keep a good eye on her, make sure she's comfortable and if she needs anything-"

" You make it sound like she's dying. She'll be ok Cato."

He muttered something before closing the door. Why didn't he say anything?

I felt kinda mad, maybe hurt even. I don't know why but he didn't even respond. What was going through his head?

I wait a little bit before sneaking downstairs. It'll be nice talking to someone else besides Cato.

" Kaylaya." Enobaria says.

She was sitting on the chair looking at me.

I give a small smile. " Hi."

She gives a small smile too. " Glad to see you in one piece. How are you hanging in there?"

" Fine. Literally everyone has blown this out of proportion."

She nods, thinking about what to say, " I've heard different."

I scoff, " What did you hear?"

" Well, I've noticed weight loss. I've seen how you reacted lately, and how tired you always looked. And, your best friends with my brother and other tributes. They talk."

I look at her before turning to go in the fridge.

" Cato was wild that no one was really doing anything. He talked to Vad apparently, I guess it didn't go well." Enobaria continues.

" Yea, I'm well aware. We had a conversation." I say shortly.

" He was just worried. I tried talking to Vad too, he insisted you were fine. Just stressed about that whole breakup. And at the academy you two are to much alike egging each other on."

She was pushing and I didn't like it. Maybe I spoke to soon about me being glad she was here.

I spin around," If you and Brutus broke up I think you would look a little different too." I say simply, pulling out some more leftovers to eat.

" He also said you have some PTSD issue?"

I feel anger as she keeps talking about this, I'm not the only one that had something like this.

" I feel like that shouldn't be uncommon seeing what I was in, along with you."

Enobaria was now across of me on the chair. " I never said I didn't have dreams, or anger issues, or mood swings. Does that sound familiar? But it did help being honest about them. I didn't want to dig a deeper hole to myself."

" What do you mean?" I ask.

" Well, some just bottle it up and explode, some drink, smoke, use girls or guys to let out their frustration, or kill themselves. And I think Cato didn't want you to be like how he is."

Cato was basically all the above.

" Why would he care?" I mutter. " He shouldn't even want to be in the same room as me. I broke up with him, he shouldn't be doing any of this for me."

I see a small smirk go on her lips, " Why does Cato do what he does, or thinks how he thinks? Because even though he acts like he doesn't care, he's the most empathetic person you can meet especially when it comes to people he cares about. The most being you."

I swallow a lump in my throat looking down at the leftovers I'm now not even hungry for.

" And I also know you do everything with good reason. He told me about..."

" I'm starting to dislike Zane the more i really get to see the true him."

She smiles, " I know."

" I tried apologizing though I don't think I did a very great job."

" Yea? What did he say?"

" Nothing, we stayed in his room for the rest of the day. Hasn't spoken about it since." I feel tears prick my eyes, " I messed up."

The realization hit me so hard it felt like I could fall backwards. I messed up, but what would change. It might be better this way.

She comes sitting on one of the stools giving me that stupid empathetic look. " Give whatever this is time... He will never admit to me that he can't live without you and the first couple days without you here drove him insane. He was a mess."

" How?"

" He tried to hide it with all the above... I was here the night you left, and I never thought I'd see someone so lost. I've never seen him crave just a look from someone, even if it was you giving him a death glare."

That statement made me laugh, " And when you got that flash back.. I've never seen him so protective. And so worried about you.. your friends didn't help that either not telling him or knowing where you were. He felt horrible, my brother didn't help."

I sigh, " I wish he wasn't so stupid."

Enobaria laughs, " Don't we all. Just..give it time."

" What do I do?"

She smiles, " Just be you. He's relaxing, same with you eventually you guys will need to talk about it, but right now your living with each other without biting your heads off so I think your off to a great start."