🥀 25 🥀

~♡~

Her heart thuds so loudly she's sure he can hear it.

He.

He's here.

She tries to swallow but her mouth is so dry. Her stomach drops to her toes and in that moment, bile rises up through her throat.

Every single flashback, every single nightmare, every single painful memory was being played out in real life before her very eyes.

This time she can't tell herself it's not real and she's safe.

Every ounce of willpower goes into breathing as her hands tremble. She wants to scream at her brain to move them towards her thighs where her gun sits but the signals are misfiring. She's paralysed.

Those brown eyes that used to tear apart every thought are now staring right into her soul.

A single tear slips down her cheek and splashes onto her thigh, jolting her out of a trance. Lyla shakily stands up.

Brock advances on her, fully out of the shadows now as Lyla can see the smirk that dances across his features.

"What? Not even going to say hi? After all this time babe?" He says menacingly as he still moves closer.

His voice is cold and piercing. Still the same after all this time.

Lyla's back is suddenly against the wall as she realises she has no where left to run.

Just like all those times before.

"You're hard to reach, especially alone. I'll give you that." He continues, undeterred by her silence and body language as she trembles hard still.

He's so close now she can smell the same aftershave that he's always worn, it fills her nostrils, wrapping its way around her lungs suffocating her. She swallows bile down again.

"How-how did you f..find me?" Lyla stutters, her voice not even sounding like her own as she clears her throat.

"Babe. You should know this by now. I'll always find you." Brock smiles. Baring his teeth as he does so.

He's close now. Only a couple of metres away. And Lyla is standing frozen like she always does.

Always the victim.

"Brock. There's a restraining order to stop you being this close to me. You need to leave. Now." Lyla says, trying to be firm despite her whole being shaking.

"C'mon Ly. That stupid piece of paper the court gave me- how could something like that stop me? You know that doesn't mean shit. I love you, let's leave all that fucking bullshit in the past. Come home."

Brock narrows his eyes now, the sparkle gone as he stares her down. It wasn't a question. It was an order.

She'd never be free.

"Don't come any closer." Lyla breathes, desperately trying to calm herself, focusing on the fact that she's not that person anymore.

She's stronger now. Loki made her stronger.

Loki.

Lyla suddenly becomes more determined as she slowly reaches down to her thigh, keeping her gaze focused on Brock, not wanting to give away what she's doing.

She's not a victim anymore. She's powerful.

"Still just as damn pretty as a peach aren't you?" Brock says, ignoring her pleas to stay back. "Wasted on this psycho."

He's nearly within arms reach now and every feature of his is flooding into her brain as flashbacks try to drag her back into the past. But she's strong now. She won't let them. Not anymore.

"I said....stay BACK!" Lyla shouts as she suddenly reaches for her gun, breaking it from the strap and pointing it up towards Brock's chest just as he nearly comes into contact with it.

Despite the practice with the gun, it feels alien against her skin, heavier than she remembered.

Brock jumps back slightly, smiling wickedly as he looks between the gun and her face.

"Damn Babe, I'm impressed. Didn't think you had it in you." Brock taunts as he gathers himself before moving forward again, as the barrel of the gun is now touching his chest.

Lyla tries to steady her shaking, gripping the gun even harder.

Brock laugh rings through the empty space.

"Don't underestimate me Brock. I'm not the same as I once was. You can't control me anymore." Lyla hisses, a new found determination rising up within her now.

No more being held in rooms by fear, no more being hit over and over, no more of him.

"Lyla, Lyla, Lyla..." Brock whistles as he looks at her lips now, biting his own. "I don't know what this crook has been filling your little head with, but come back to the real world. Enough playing house now. It's make believe shit."

Lyla still holds the gun strong, breathing deeper now. She flicks the safety off, making Brock's smile falters just a little.

"I said enough now." Brock says more authoritative this time as his whole demeanour changes.

The small microexpressions that Lyla had trained herself in in order to survive are being shown again. She clenches her jaw, holding steady.

"And here I am telling you...to fuck off!" Lyla shouts again, surprising herself at how loud her voice comes across.

Brock's face breaks out into full anger now as his nostrils flare, his eyes filling with hatred. Lyla tries to ignore the signs.

That she's going to end up hurt.

"Now go before I call the police. Or worse, Loki sees you." Lyla whispers, tears still slipping down her face, betraying her expression and actions.

"I don't think you will. Just like I don't think youll use this gun. Besides, where's your gangster boyfriend now?" Brock laughs as he grips the gun, throwing it to the side with such force it catches Lyla off guard.

The whole scene changes very quickly.

Brock grabs Lyla's arm as she tries to reach down and grab the weapon off the floor, flinging her to the floor, in an all too familiar move. Her head ricochets off the hard floor, making her feel dizzy.

"Brock! Stop it!" She screams as her fight or flight kicks in now.

The roles they've always played slipping back on so easily.

Not today.

Lyla manages to land a kick to Brock's groin, in a manoeuvre that comes from the back of her mind from the Red Room training.

It's enough that he howls and stumbles, long enough for her to bend down and grab the gun again. She points it directly at Brock as he stands back up, face purple from pain as he spits on the ground.

Squeeze the trigger. Keep your eyes open.

The safe memories of that day try to outdo the bad ones clawing her under now.

"Lyla, don't do this, you know we're meant to be together babe. You can't deny it." Brock whispers seductively now but Lyla can see the venom in his face.

He's pissed. More than pissed. She's not sure how he tracked her to this party, or how he even got in. Her head spins.

"You...abused me Brock. Don't you dare call me that. I was nothing but a punching bag for you. Do you even understand who you are? You're a pathetic coward who beat up the person he supposedly loved." Lyla says with force. Brock's face contorts.

"I did love you Ly. I do. But you gave me no choice. You didn't put me first. I've changed anyway. That's why I've come back for you again. We can work all this out." Brock plays on her emotions.

She can't tell what mood or line is going to come out of him next and it's all so terrifying and confusing.

"I'd rather die than go back to you." Lyla seethes as she still grips the cool metal for her life.

Brock takes another step closer, the smell of him making Lyla feel sick as her arm throbs in a familiar way.

Brock raises his hand again, and Lyla fights the urge deeply engraved within her to flinch away, knowing he was going for her face this time. A treat he saved for only her worse behaviour.

"So be it, you little bitch." Brock mutters as he lunges.

Lyla shuts her eyes tightly before a loud bang goes off. Her fingers shake and her body jolts before she's opening her lids again, looking down at the gun she apparently just fired.

Fortunately only at Brock's foot.

Brock screams bloody murder as Lyla's in shock she's even pulled the trigger. She drops the gun immediately, horrified at her actions. She wanted him hurt yes, but she doesn't want him killed. She's a good person, she's not a murderer.

That's the only thing that differentiates her from those around her.

But if you love a bad person, does that make you any different?

Brock flings himself forward, knocking her to the ground and pinning her underneath him.

"You fucking shot me you whore. That was a big mistake!" He screams into her face.

Lyla closes her eyes as she prepares to be beaten, hoping that someone, somewhere finds out she's missing.

Loki....

As if the mere thought of him can summon him, the door to the gym bursts open so hard the glass shatters to the window next to it.

She turns her head to the side, seeing the love of her life striding towards her. But he looks different than he's ever looked before.

He looks like a monster, hunting its prey.

He stalks forward, his hair hanging over his face as his pupils dilate at the sight before him. He whips out his dagger, immediately running up behind Brock and pulling him off Lyla by the collar, throwing him on his back with ease.

Lyla watches the way Loki's face lights up when he sees Brock look at him in recognition, fear plaguing his features as he realises this wasn't part of the plan.

Loki flips his dagger between his fingers like an intricate dance move as he kneels over him, grabbing his neck and pulling him upwards to his blade.

"How dare you show up here Rumlow. How dare you lay a finger on her, even be in her presence?! You are a fucking coward. I swore when I found you I would kill you. Slowly, intimately, in every way you fear most. And I intend to keep that promise." Loki drawls as he slowly brings the blade over Rumlow's cheek, letting the blood slowly trickle down over the metallic knife.

He presses harder whilst Rumlow struggles and pleads.

"Loki please. Please you're scaring me. I need you." Lyla whimpers as she gets herself off the floor shakily, feeling like she's in a room full of strangers.

No longer feeling safe. She knew Loki was a killer, but seeing this side of him before her is terrifying her.

"Hiding in the shadows like the pathetic man you are. I found your little hideout at the motel. I've been savouring the image of me slitting your throat ever since." Loki purrs.

"Whatever she's told you about me, it's all lies. I didn't do anything she didn't deserve. You'll see it too soon enough." Brock gasps between breaths.

"She didn't need to tell me. The way you've marked her body proves it. Fortunately my friends at the FBI owed me a favour or two. I knew you'd surface again. You fucking piece of shit." Loki spits.

Lyla's heart has stopped beating again as the words sink in.

"Loki...what do you mean when you found him? Have you been hunting him all this time?" Lyla asks and Loki finally looks towards her, his face softening before he checks himself, pressing the blade even harder in and delighting in Rumlow's squirms.

"I had to. I have to keep you safe Love." He says through gritted teeth as he momentarily pulls away the blade, landing a hard punch to Rumlow's face.

Lyla can see the pent up rage, the hatred, the anger. Not just on Loki but on both the men.

"Not through this Lokes. Not by killing him. I...I wanted to do this the proper way. I wanted to hand him over to the police. He's broken the restraining order...he- he'll get arrested..." Lyla sobs as she tries to approach Loki, but just as she gets close, Loki lands another punch, ignoring her pleas.

He's too caught up in his fantasy. Loving every single sound of the pain coming from the animal below him.

"The police won't do anything Lyla. How can you be so stupid as to see that? This is the way the world truly works! Don't be so naive. This is why I told you to stay out of my business. You'll never be safe from him. I have to do this." Loki spits as he doesn't take his eyes off Brock.

Lyla feels like she's been punched in the gut.

Before she can get any closer, she's knocked off balance as Brock gets a leg over Loki, momentarily gaining the advantage and landing blows to his torso.

Loki barely registers the pain before he retaliates, the two in a deadly brawl. Lyla curls onto her side as she tries not to register the pain, something she's so good at now.

Here Loki was again. Calling her naive. This time there was no audience to play up to. So this is how he truly felt. Her chest heaves.

"Loki....Brock....stop, please!" She screams pointlessly as the two men fight with the intent of death.

Lyla sees a flash of silver and she isn't sure who's knife is who's. She hears shouts of pain and sees blood, and its all too much. She pushes herself backwards on the floor, her ears ringing as she picks up the gun that she dropped earlier. But she can't see through the tears that line her vision. She isn't sure what she'd do with it anyway.

She loves Loki. She was abused by Brock despite loving him once in a different way. But if she doesn't do something, one of them is going to die and soon. Maybe she would be better if she could just shut off the humanity within her like everyone else seemed to do so easily. Perhaps then she could no longer be hurt.

Her whole frame violently shakes as she watches the two men fight before her. Loki is winning now, getting in blow after blow, she sees him hold his dagger to Brock's neck as crimson liquid stains his face. Loki has a maniacal look on his face...as if he's enjoying it.

Torturer.

Ruthless.

Killer.

Lyla's thoughts are too fast as she's sunken in painful memories. Loki's face is blurring into Brock's and she can't tell them apart. She closes her eyes, holding her hands against her ears to drown out the screams.

Suddenly there's a hand wrapping around hers, taking the gun away from her. Before she has time to turn and fight whoever's there, her body is being lifted off the floor and towards the exit. She shouts for Loki but he's too lost in the gleeful delight of bloodshed to notice her.

His true priorities are showing.

She continues crying before she's outside and she recognises the scent of the person who's arms are now around her.

Bucky.

"Hey, hey, it's ok, it's ok." He soothes as he holds her close.

She clings onto his jacket as she feels too weak to move or speak or process what's happened.

"Don't let him kill him, please James. I don't want this. Call the cops." Lyla breathes through sobs and Bucky looks at her pained.

He nods as he gestures for someone behind him to come over. Soon, Lyla is being passed to Nat who wipes her face and shushes her, out of breath herself from running round the grounds. Steve, Pietro, Clint and Thor are advancing too, hearing the screams.

Bucky runs in and Lyla can see him try to pry Loki off Brock, shouting at him but it sounds far away. Like she's trapped behind a glass veil. Nat strokes her hair, checking her for signs of injury as she shouts at the men to go help.

Lyla turns around, away from the sight momentarily as she looks back towards the grounds, the main party seeming so far away.

But in the corner of her eye, something catches her attention. She can't be sure as her vision is blurry and she's dizzy, but far away she thinks she's sees a face looking on towards them before disappearing back inside.

A face of someone with white hair and an eyepatch.

Lyla quickly turns away and back into Nat, shaking off the vision.

Loki swings his dagger at Bucky now out of instinct, giving Brock enough time to wiggle out of Loki's grasp as he crawls bloodied across the floor.

Bucky raises his hands defensively and Lyla sees him point towards her, Loki's gaze trails over, as if he's coming back to himself and realising what he's done. He looks down at his hands, dropping his blade as Steve and Thor simultaneously grab Brock, ensuring he can't get away.

Loki comes running out with James close behind but all Lyla can see is the blood on his hands.

He looks like her Loki again, but the fact he'd gone behind her back hunting him all this time instead of working with the police boils her blood. He'd always planned to kill him, or worse. Lyla knew it was out of love for her, but still, she couldn't take it in that moment.

"My Love.. I'm so sorry...are you ok?" He asks rasping for breath as he tries to come closer but Lyla squirms away, closer to Nat.

Nat wraps a hand around her protectively, shielding her as best she can.

"Stay away from me. You lied to me. I thought you were changing. I thought you could be different for me. Who I saw in there...he wasn't my Loki." She shouts and the look she gives him boils his blood.

"Lyla...please." Loki's voice breaks as he tries again to approach her.

Lyla shakes her head.

"You should've just been honest with me. I'm not a fucking victim. Quit treating me like one. I could've helped you if I'd have known. We could've turned him in together. But you're right...I was too naive all this time." She mumbles and Loki looks utterly heartbroken.

"We need to get you home. We'll get all this sorted. But right now you need to get home and be safe." Nat shushes her again as she looks at Loki with a death stare.

She knew her friend would end up hurt again. She was too loving to the wrong people. Nat wants to take her far away from here.

"I'll take her home Nat. Please, it's the least I can do." Bucky speaks up.

Lyla looks up at him properly now. His face looks absolutely ashen and he's lost his usual confident swagger. Nat shakes her head.

"No. I'll call us a cab." Nat states.

"No Nat. You stay here with Thor please. Carry on the party as normal. If both of us disappear suddenly it'll look suspicious. Despite everything I don't want to cause more trouble for them both." Lyla whispers as she looks up at her best friend, remembering Odin and the reason they're here.

Nat considers it carefully before she sees Thor and Steve walking out the other end of the gym with Brock. He turns as if noticing everyone staring and gives one last bloody smile. Nat scowls at him, fighting the urge herself to break his jaw.

"Fine, but you're ringing me the minute you get in. James I'll make sure of it. Don't fuck around." Nat orders and James nods his head solemnly.

"I swear." Bucky says as he raises his hands.

Nat seems satisfied that he's genuine as she pulls the both of them off the ground slowly.

Loki looks shell-shocked as he glances down at his hands, suddenly aware of Brock's blood coating them. A sight he'd longed to see for so long. And Lyla, actually having the strength to shoot him. He was so proud. He just wanted her to be safe. But he understood her trauma, her triggers. He wasn't what she needed right now.

He would never be able to truly keep her safe. This was all his fault.

But the fact Barnes was taking her home made his blood boil.

He looks one last time at Lyla before gripping James' shoulder of his prosthetic arm.

"Don't you dare touch her or harm a hair on her head. If you do, your other arm is gone." Loki threatens so lowly, that no one but James hears.

Bucky gives a nod, but secretly smiles.

He might finally have a chance.

---

A/N: what's your thoughts? ♡