🥀 20 🥀

~♡~

Lyla collapses into her bed in her new apartment, pulling the silky sheets around her and inhaling deeply.

Her knuckles and wrist throb under the bandages that the nurse had wrapped around her whilst Loki sat and watched with disapproving and worried eyes. Lyla however, could barely even register the pain.

She'd asked that Loki leave her alone for the night, again much to his disapproval, so that she could gather her thoughts without his watchful, piercing eyes. That hadn't stopped Loki from keeping Clint stationed outside her apartment however. Until Brock was found, it'd remain that way.

Lyla groans as she rolls over, trying desperately to shut off her brain that was whirring at a million miles an hour. Her whole life had been so fucked and dominated by loss and control. She just wanted something simple for once in her life.

She'd been so caught up in the hurricane that was Loki that she was beginning to now realise that she was the cause of chaos. She was the one who selected these people, put herself in these situations when she could leave, but she couldn't quieten down the tiny voice that was desperately and utterly in love with him. The monster, the mob boss, the fallen angel that was Loki Odinson. No one had ever made her feel like him, and no one ever would.

She was screwed.

Resigning herself to the fact she wasn't going to sleep, Lyla gets out of bed, leaning to peer out of the window and watch the nightlife below her on the city streets. It always helped her feel less alone when she couldn't sleep, that a whole other city full of people were still alive and doing things.

She squints her eyes as she recognises Clint's car in front of the building and rolls her eyes, knowing Loki has her followed everywhere and not sure in this moment how she feels about it.

Was this all just another form of control? Was she falling into the same pattern as before?

No, don't be so fucking stupid Lyla. Loki would never hurt you. He doesn't want to control you, just the situations so he can protect you. Or was he?

Lyla scrunches her eyes up and rests her forehead against the cold glass sighing deeply. Wandering over to the kitchen she pours herself a glass of cold water, washing it down with an aspirin or two to numb herself.

She'd brought up too many images during training with Nat at the Red Room, images she was still finding hard to shake from the clutches of her mind. Images that had been long buried that were clawing to the surface now.

His face, his voice, his smell. It was all blurring into one horrible nightmarish vision.

He would find her again, she was sure of that.

Lyla stumbles back to bed, dazily looking at her phone and noting that it was 3am. She must've been up reading after she'd gotten back from the hospital for longer than she thought. Time had slipped away from her tonight.

She saw a message from Loki flash across the screen. He must not have been sleeping much either.

Loki: Lyla, I do hope you're okay. I'm worried about you. We don't have to do tomorrow. Please just rest Pet. L. x

Lyla didn't even have it in her to reply, but she knew he'd be worried if she didn't.

Lyla: I'm fine Lokes, tomorrow is still good for me. I need to learn how to protect myself. I promised you. See you at 9. x

Lyla threw her phone down onto the bed next to her as she tried to collapse back into the sheets again, her brain feeling fuzzy and static from the visions plaguing the back of her mind.

His eyes were the last thing she saw before she closed them.

And not the green ones that had previously made her feel safe.

~♤~

"Please, my Darling, keep your eyes open this time when you squeeze the trigger." Loki murmured against her ear as he tried to earn a light laugh from the exhausted looking girl in front of him.

It worked, Lyla's lips pulled upwards slightly as she rolls her eyes. He'd do anything to keep her safe, to keep her happy.

"Now shoulders relax a little, dominant foot forward, anchor yourself down as you see past the gun to the target." Loki orders louder this time, as Steve and Thor watch from the side-lines whilst Nat plays cheerleader, already knowing the basics after being with Stark.

They'd been at it for a couple of hours now. Lyla was tired, but something within her was igniting at the feel of the gun in her fingers. Though she wouldn't admit it.

Lyla takes a deep breath, doing as Loki said and trying to calm her thoughts, empty her mind to nothing but the target several feet ahead of her in these woods at the back of Loki's house.

She slowly, but surely squeezes the trigger, feeling a rush of adrenaline surge through her veins as the bullet shooting forward made the gun push back against her hands. She shakily lowered the gun, looking at the target and seeing it had hit the side of the abdomen.

The feeling of power in her hands, literally, made her feel for once unstoppable. A force to be reckoned with. Although she had always despised weapons and guns, she was hesitant to admit she now saw a little of the appeal.

"Yay go Ly!" Nat shouts proudly as Steve and Thor clap along at the effort.

Loki looks down at Lyla proudly, his eyes sparkling and his pupils dialating slightly. Lyla didn't miss how turned on he looked with her holding a gun so close to him, in her tight khaki coloured jeans and black crop top. She feels like a godamn spy, and a powerful one at that. It was a good feeling. One she wasn't expecting.

"Good girl." Loki mutters under his breath as he reloads her gun for her ready to try again.

His watchful eyes flicker down to her bandaged, and swollen, knuckles as she clearly ignores the pain she was in. He hoped to the Gods she wasn't pushing herself too far. The only thing that kept him going was the thought of plunging his dagger into Brock's neck when he found the bastard.

Lyla, suddenly feeling a little more confident under Loki's eyes, clicks the safety back off the gun, before standing as she was and aiming for the target again.

She breathes deeply, feeling Loki's energy next to her and the wind lightly whispering through the trees around her. Focusing her energy, she squeezes the trigger twice in a row, sending two simultaneous rounds into the target. Pulling the gun down, she squints to see that she's got one directly through the target's chest and one through the shoulder. She feels proud.

Loki brushes his hand across her long hair that's fallen over her shoulder, moving it behind her ear and leaning in closely. His fingertips leaving a trail of goosebumps as he does so.

"You're a natural." He murmurs teasingly and Lyla suddenly feels alive in a different way.

The adrenaline from the gun firing, hitting the target and Loki by her side fills her with lust. She ignores the throbbing in her hand from clasping the gun with her bruised knuckles, trying desperately to tune into the part of her that's keeping her feeling alive right now and stopping her from spiralling into the darkness.

"Great job Lyla!" Steve says, giving her a thumbs up as her gaze briefly trails over to the others who are still talking amongst themselves, half watching.

Loki moves impossibly closer, his lips hovering over her ear, grazing it so slightly.

"Don't look at them, look at me." Loki orders as he brings a hand up to lift Lyla's chin and gaze back towards him possessively.

"You like me with a gun?" Lyla flirts as she flicks the safety back on before bringing it up, slowly, testingly, to Loki's jaw, knowing that the chambers are empty.

The move is so out of character for Lyla, she isn't sure what made her do it. Loki closes his eyes briefly as his fingers trail over hers on the cool metal, slowly pulling it away from him and down to his side in his grip, smirking a he watches Lyla with fascination. She really was taking to weapon training like a pro.

The innocent, sweet warm girl. This corrupted version of her, a darker version, was sinfully delightful.

"I like how you think you've got the power." Loki murmurs back as he breathes hot air against her lips now, carefully watching her every movement, the way she's still so responsive to him after all this time, and the way that makes him feel inside.

More than a possession, an obsession. He can practically hear her heartrate pick up. And the fact she suddenly seems so much more confident sends an ache to his core.

"I think you'll find I have..." Lyla says as she trails her fingers delicately around his waist, pulling him in for a kiss, flicking her tongue over his lips before biting down gently, teasingly, slowly.

Loki hums in satisfaction as Lyla's hands roam around him, clinging onto his shirt under his jacket. Lyla deepens it, opening her mouth wider and pushing her tongue further into his mouth, trying not to get lost in the taste of him, so utterly intoxicating. Fireworks every fucking time.

Loki groans as he realises quickly what she's doing, allowing himself to get momentarily distracted. He firmly grips her wrists, stilling her movements and pulling away from her lips just enough to speak.

Lyla smirks as she realises she's been caught, but pleased at how far she got, clutching his blade in her left hand, despite it being held in his grip tightly. Loki looks down purposefully, prying her fingers open and putting the blade back into his jacket but still holding the gun.

He shakes his head a little, tutting firmly under his breath in mock disapproval. But Lyla doesn't miss the way his eyes gleam back at her brave gesture. She was misbehaving on purpose...and he knew it.

He brings her hands up to his face, kissing each wrist, taking extra care of her hurt one, before smiling at her wickedly.

"You've no idea how turned on you're making me right now." Loki whispers smoothly, his voice like liquid gold as it trickles down Lyla's spine.

Lyla looks down momentarily, smiling herself.

"Oh I think I have an idea." She murmurs as she feels Loki's bulge against her.

The powerful feeling costuming her. Replacing the victim mentality. Making her feel... strong.

Although Loki craves violence and punishment, roughness over tenderness, Lyla never once feels as if she is in danger from him. Not how she did with her ex. The irony of going for someone arguably more intimidating and harmful than her ex and actually feeling like she was in pure, dizzingly love with him was not lost on her. Loki never made her feel the way he did, even with his taunts about her being a brat, or his fingers around her throat. Because this time she knew she did have some control. And it was her choice.

"Your turn". Lyla whispers hoarsely as she looks down to the weapon in his fingers, watching as Loki loads the gun again, his eyes never leaving hers.

His fingers deftly working automatically, like muscle memory. Lyla felt her core twinge. And with that immediate shame from what was making her so lustful.

Loki held the gun out, still looking at Lyla before he glances, ever so quickly and slightly, to the target for confirmation, before resuming his fixation back on his Pet before him.

He slowly squeezes the trigger, letting the bullets seize forward from their shells. The bangs startle Lyla a little as she looks over at the target, as Loki empties the clip now onto the ground, seeing his perfect accuracy. He wears a nonchalant grin on his face as he notices her micro expressions. The flushed cheeks, the heavy breaths, the clenching of her fists. She was enjoying the show.

"Bullseye." She breathes as she feels her heart race.

That tiny glimpse into the window of his world was frightening and thrilling. The way Loki looked so natural with a gun. Like her with a book. Both two very different weapons.

The pen and the sword.

Lyla feels speechless as Loki grins smugly at her, watching her become more blushing and finding the action mesmerising as well as interesting. The little lamb was killing his curiosity. He sighs as he throws the gun to the ground, turning to Lyla.

"I'd say your training is over for the day, you've hit the target more than you haven't, you know how to unload and load, we'll catch up another day." Loki breathes down onto her as he snakes both hands around her neck, pulling her in close for a kiss again.

Lyla feels herself melt like butter.

"Hey lovebirds!" I thought we were gonna have lunch? The chef has gotta be done by now." Thor's voice booms over as Loki huffs in frustration, unwillingly pulling away from the girl before him, looking over annoyed at his brother.

"By all means, go ahead brother and find out." Loki shouts back, coldness tinging his tone as he looks back down at Lyla, seeing her bite her lip between her teeth as her chest heaves.

"Now?" Loki asks as he watches the three rolling their eyes, laughing and walking back to Loki's mansion, leaving them to it.

Lyla knows what he's asking.

She nods her head, humming.

"I can't wait. I need you." She replies back in a sultry tone, as Loki pulls her jacket down her shoulders, throwing it onto the ground, uncaring about the mess.

"I'll buy you a new outfit." Loki whispers as he connects her lips to his again feverishly, bruisingly hard as if the consent she's just given him was holding back his darkest desires.

Loki throws his own jacket off as they continue kissing, gripping onto each other, grabbing fistfuls of clothing and ripping until they were practically naked. Lyla still in her lingerie and shoes as Loki walks her backwards to a tree, her back slamming into the rough wood uncaringly.

The wind is knocked out of Lyla but it just adds to her moans as Loki continues his movements against her, pressing his body hard against her, neither one of them feeling the weather with it being a warmer New York day.

Loki pushes her underwear to the side, slicking a finger through her folds and bringing it up to his mouth, groaning at the taste as Lyla gasps at the sudden contact. His eyes blaze with lust as he grabs her hair and tilts her head up to look at him fully.

"Taste yourself." He instructs as he licks his tongue against hers.

Lyla moans as she feels the sweet taste on her tongue, completely uncaring that their friends were here moments ago and now they were going to be fucking in the woods after she'd been shooting a gun for the first time. It was all so surreal.

Loki bites her shoulder hard as he moves back to the same spot and starts to pump his fingers inside of her now, earning loud moans and absolutely devouring every one of them.

"Fucking scream for me Lyla, out here in the woods, I don't give a shit if anyone can hear. I want them to know how good I pleasure you." Loki growls, completely feral, like a wild part of him was taking over.

Lyla's eyes scrunch as he continues to finger fuck her so good, before he gets on his knees, pressing her harder into the tree behind her and licking against her clit. Lyla feels like she's in a dream, this can't be real. To feel this amazing so quickly.

"Loki, don't stop Love." She drawls as the nickname leaves her mouth before she can stop it.

Loki stops for a moment, looking up at her with sparkling eyes before he grins and continues.

Loki continues eagerly, lapping up Lyla and multi-tasking with his divine fingers, in and out as Lyla feels herself clenching around him.

Any time she's with him she feels like she's floating into a black hole in the best way possible, and nothing can stop it. No amount of gravity can tie her down.

"Please, let me cum Sir, please." Lyla pants, her scalp pressing against the bark roughly.

She pulls her hands up to play with her nipples, gripping them hard seen as Loki can't, letting out little mewls as she does. Loki is being driven mad by her actions.

She was so godamn good for asking.

Loki looks up at her through his long lashes, nodding eagerly. With the permission, there's nothing to stop Lyla from orgasming there and then.

Lyla screams Loki's name as she grinds against his face and fingers, riding out her high as Loki continues relentlessly, until he's sure she's through to the other side.

Looking pleased with himself at the naked and blissed out Lyla above him, he stands up, spinning her around so her stomach is against the trunk now, nibbling her earlobe and continuing to bite on her shoulder. Little purple marks are forming and Loki loves that it shows she's his.

He wishes her abuser could see her now, so perfect for him, Loki being able to do what he never could. He wanted to fuck Lyla with the man's blood running down his face, the ultimate feeling of power. The imaginary smell of iron and the satisfaction of sense of pure destruction floods his mind.

Getting lost in the imagery, he pulls her hips towards him as he plunges into her with no warning, immediately going in at a heavy pace. Lyla grips the branches nearest to her, gasping as she's not allowed relief from her last orgasm.

"You're so obedient for me. Aren't you Darling?" Loki coos in her ear as he holds firmly onto her waist, slamming her against him harder and harder, until he's so deep inside her he feels like he's become part of her.

Loki moves a hand to plant onto the tree behind her to steady himself now with the force he's fucking her. Lyla feels herself drooling from the intense feeling of fullness.

"I am Sir, only for you. God, Loki fuck me hard." She drawls as Loki obeys, pummelling into her.

Loki suddenly remembers how responsive she was that day he pulled out his blade in the changing rooms and how her face lit up, in both fear and intrigue. He bends down to the pile of clothes next to him, briefly slipping out of her as he grabs the gun, making sure the safety is on before he pulls it up against Lyla's throat.

Normally he'd like the thrill of not having the safety on, knowing it could go off at any second, but he can't do that, not now. Not when he's struggling to stay in control of his movements. He wants to test out his theory again.

Lyla gasps in shock as she feels the cold metal press against her thorax, feeling herself tighten around him involuntarily as he enters her again. Loki continues fucking her.

"You like this gun don't you, little slut? You love the danger, love the thrill of this lifestyle that you are so against. I can feel it. Your little pussy tightening around my cock with this gun against you. Fuck...doing such a good job Lyla." Loki taunts and praises as he continues to chase his high.

Lyla feels her own orgasm approaching again, about to crash over her like a tsunami.

Loki can feel her, and he knows she's about to dive over.

"Cum now Pet. With me. I want to see you lose yourself all over my cock." Loki orders, his voice leaving no room for arguing.

The barrel of the gun presses into her throat, sure to leave a bruise.

But Lyla's body betrayed how much she loved it.

With that, they both come together, crying out against each other's sweaty bodies in the forest, not caring who hears or sees. Loki leans forward against her, kissing her temple before pulling out of her slowly, groaning.

Lyla feels wet dripping down her leg as Loki wipes a finger across it to catch the moisture, bringing it up to her mouth, watching her so obediently open wide for him as he thrusts the finger in for her to clean. Lyla obeys, still in a post-orgasmic haze.

Loki helps Lyla get dressed before dressing himself as they both walk back up to his house for food. Being practically starving now.

"Speak of the devil." Steve sighs as the rest of them look over at the two dishevelled and blushing pair.

More so on Lyla's end than Loki's, who looks on as if nothing had happened, except his firm grip on the small of her back possessively gives away what they've just done.

"Careful how you summon me." Loki replies, licking his lips as if he had no care in the world.

Lyla can't even bring herself to talk as she sees Nat look over at her, winking and giggling.

"Now we have matters to discuss. We have to attend the Zemo's party in a few days and the girls have been requested by our father. We know what that means unfortunately." Loki begins as he looks between the two men in front of him worringly.

The girls share an equally concerned glance at the change of tone.

"What does it mean?" Lyla asks, her voice shaky after screaming just moments ago.

"It means that you're both in danger. Odin wants to make sure my brother and I aren't distracted from our jobs. And he knows about you both, that's not a good thing." Thor replies grimly as he looks at Nat now, his hand brushing over hers.

Steve nods understandingly.

"How is this going to work? With your father knowing?" Lyla asks again, worried about the answer.

"I'm not sure." Thor admits in defeat, and Lyla sees for the first time fear flicker across Loki's face.

If she thought Loki was scary when needed, what on Earth could his father be like?

"It's going to work because we're going to convince father that it isn't serious. You and Natasha have your parts to play." Loki suddenly says decisively as his mask slips back on.

Lyla feels her heart sink a little. They'd come so far, she didn't want to go backwards, but there was so much about their world that terrified her that she didn't know. Their father being one of them.

Since Loki had mentioned the party, Lyla had been wondering what it would be like to see even more of his world. It had frozen her in fear as well as excited and intrigued her.

Lyla clears her throat.

"Our parts?" She asks again, not liking the phrase.

Loki nods, not looking in her direction for fear of seeing her disappointment in him.

Steve sighs as he realises the gravity of the situation for the girls.

"I think what Loki means-" Thor began, trying to mediate as usual, but Lyla waves a hand to silence him.

"Let him explain." She says harshly. Thor looks surprised at her tone but instantly quietens down.

Loki huffs and looks towards Lyla and Nat who are awaiting his answer.

"If we have to survive this then, yes, a temporary measure." Loki says reluctantly and his eyes look apologetic.

"Temporary, won't your dad always be here? He's your boss after all. If I'm going to put you in trouble Loki...or...danger...then we need to have a talk." Lyla croaks and Nat lightly touches her shoulder in understanding.

She didn't want Nat to tell her 'I told you so' or that this was slowly getting messier by the day.

"Lyla, we'll figure something out. Don't worry about me. This is about you. I need you safe." Loki tried to explain, feeling a weight in his chest as he realises how it sounds.

Fuck this is why he didn't do this. Mix business with pleasure. Fall in love with people.

He couldn't have anything good in this life, it was an occupational hazard. Karma had taken his mother from them, and half of him knew that he would suffer a similar fate with the woman standing before him. The woman who looked so hurt and lovingly at him.

He didn't deserve this. He needed to protect her and then let her go, find her peace somewhere where there was no danger. She'd been put in danger for the last few years and here he was, exploiting that.

"So I've gotta go back to being just your whore for the night, is that it?" Lyla asks, trying to fake a smile, turn it into a joke, anything to stop that insecurity bubbling up again.

"Ly-" Nat also starts but Lyla laughs, shaking her head as Loki and the rest look on warily.

Thor looks towards Steve who frowns hard at Loki before him.

"It's fine, let's just get this party out the way. Tell me what I need to know, to stay safe." Lyla says as the chef brings out the lunch items.

If she had a part to play, then play it she would.

Despite her heart hurting.

---

A/N: Hello my loves <3

I have had another little gap in writing. I'm really still struggling with my mental health and most days it's hard to go to work, let alone write. Whenever I do write I feel like it's not good and I beat myself up about it as I feel like I'm letting myself and my readers down. Please let me know if you're enjoying this story still :)

Entwined (My Bucky FF) has got over 60k+ reads which is insane to me. Thank you to everyone who's read it and left lovely comments, they keep me going on the hard days.

Take care, and I'm always here if you need me, L. xo