Chapter 26

"So, what do you think? Should I go?"

Spencer hugged her knees to her chest. Although it wasn't cold outside, there was a chill that had settled in the town since the return of the Cullens. It had seeped into the reservation, putting everyone on edge, especially the wolves. Patrols had doubled, and the inevitability of more kids turning hung over them like a dark cloud.

"I honestly couldn't tell you, Spence," Sam sighed. She could tell he was tired. Sleeplessness clung to his eyes, and stress was evident in the line of his furrowed eyebrows. "I mean, if you weren't my sister and you didn't care for the guy, I'd tell you to let him rot. But I know you do care about him, even if you don't want to admit it. And I know you'll regret it if something happens to him, and you could have done something to help him."

"So, you do think I should go."

"Bean, that's your decision at the end of the day," he said. "Only you can decide that."

"He hurt me, Sam," she said through shuddering breaths. "He broke my heart like no one has before. But I can't let him just waste away while his family is suffering. I just can't."

"And that's okay, Spence," he comforted, taking her into a tight hug. "That guy doesn't deserve a single shred of dignity you show him, but I'm so proud of who you are as a person. No one in that family could ever have an ounce of the compassion you have for them."

"They're not that bad," Spencer chuckled. "At least not all of them."

"All the same to me," he shrugged. "Just be careful, okay? That guy already hurt you once. I won't allow him to hurt you again."

"Thanks, Sam," she grinned. "What did I do to have the best brother in the world?"

"I ask myself that every day of my life."

"It's good to know you're humble," she scoffed jokingly. "That's a great trait to have as an alpha."

"I know," he laughed. "I do have one question for you, Spence."

"Shoot."

"What about the other guy at the hospital that you give googly eyes to?" he asked, knocking the air from Spencer's lungs. "You know, the one that came to Harry's funeral."

"W-who?" the girl stammered, knowing her heart would be evidence enough that she knew exactly what her brother was talking about. "Do you mean Eden? He's my supervisor, that's all."

"Well, we both know how well you get along with supervisors," he teased. "No, but, seriously, what's going on there? I mean, he showed up at Harry's funeral and was asking how you were doing. I don't know about you, but I already like him."

"You should ask him out then," she chuckled. "I heard he's single."

"Thanks, but I'm taken. Although, I wouldn't mind dating a doctor," her brother joked. "But is there something there?"

Saying the words out loud would only cement what Spencer already knew, and she wasn't sure if she was ready to do that just yet. Her feelings had gone on a neck-wrecking rollercoaster in the past few months, and she had yet to recover completely. Admitting to Sam what she had started feeling for Eden would mean there would be she wouldn't be the only one to know her heart had opened to someone else—even if it still beat for another person.

But she couldn't lie. Not to Sam, at least. Not anymore. "I kind of like him," she confessed, her cheeks flushing red at her words. "I'm not sure when it happened, but I can't get him out of my head."

"Does that mean you're over Dr. Dead?"

"Sam..."

"Sorry," he chuckled as he slouched in the seat. "I'm just joking—a little. But the question still stands."

"Not really," she sighed, confessing without a fight. "I just don't think I can go back to him. Of course, I want him to be safe and with his family. But, I want to try to pass that page after he's back home. As much as I still love him, I can't allow him back in my life—I just can't."

Spencer didn't know she was crying until she felt Sam wipe away the tears that had fallen before wrapping her in another hug. "I'm proud of you, Bean," he said. "He has no idea what he's lost. It's about time you get out there and live your life, Spence. You've got so much to give, and you've only just begun."

She spent the rest of the morning preparing herself mentally to go over to the Cullen house for the first time in over six months. If she said she was ready to face the family, she would be lying. Given how she had reacted when she saw Alice and how she felt when she met with Esme, there was no way she could tell what her reaction would be once she was there.

Up until the last second, she had psyched herself out. Spencer told herself not to go, to let them suffer like she had for even a fraction of the time. But once she was in her truck, there was no going back for her. Even if they deserved it, she would not allow that family to fall apart. Not if she could help it.

The ground crackled under her as she slowed to a stop, and she was sure everyone who was inside the house knew she had arrived. A sense of déjà vu washed over her as she remembered the first time she had come to the home. Spencer had been excited, if not a little nervous to be there. She had felt unworthy of gracing the high ceilings and modern décor of the Cullen house. The grandness of the space had made her wary of her presence there, as though she wasn't important enough to walk its halls.

That afternoon she saw how wrong she had been. The house had little to no importance and nothing, and no one, inside could determine her worth. It had just four walls and expensive furniture barely used by vampires who had no real sense of integrity. There was nothing to be intimidated by. Not anymore.

Esme opened the front door as Spencer exited her car, a smile of relief spread across her mouth. The woman stopped herself from rushing to hug the girl like she wanted. There was no closeness between them anymore, no familiarity. It had all died the moment she had left without another word. If there were to be a relationship again, it would have to be rebuilt once more, stone by very heavy stone.

"Spencer," Esme sighed in relief. "You came."

"I did," she replied, accepting the woman's offer to enter the house. "I couldn't stand by while you and the family suffered with this. I could never be that heartless."

"O-of course," the vampire chuckled awkwardly. "I asked the kids to leave the house so we could talk peacefully."

"Great. Thanks."

"Uh, um, do you want anything? Water or something?"

"I'm fine, Esme," Spencer said. "I just want to know everything you do so we can get Carlisle home, okay?"

"Yes, y-yes," she stammered as she joined Spencer on the couch. "Uh, where do you want to start?"

The Uley girl had never seen Esme so flustered. She was sure if the woman was still human, her cheeks would be flushed, and she'd be trembling with nervousness. Long gone was the confident woman who had welcomed her into her home a long time before. In her place stood a nervous wreck who had no clue how to treat Spencer—they weren't friends, they weren't strangers.

"Start with Ithaca, the day he left," Spencer recalled. "You said he wasn't himself."

"Yes, well, he made sure everything was well with the house," she started. "He changed all the locks, checked all the areas surrounding the house, and then he spent a long time locked in his office. No one could really tell what he was doing—we assumed it had something to do with his new job."

"Did you find out what he was doing?"

"He was making sure all of our financials were up to date, and all our assets were secure," she replied. "Carlisle was ensuring the family would be okay without him."I should have known something was wrong," Esme continued. "He hadn't been feeding much, and he had been so sad since we left Forks. I know it probably won't mean anything anymore, but leaving you was the hardest thing he's had to do, Spencer. He thought—we all did—that you'd be better off without us here."

"Let's refrain from these sentimentalities, Esme. I'm begging you," the girl pleaded seriously. "I'm not here to hear apologies and excuses. There's a job to do, and I want to get it over with as soon as possible. Let's just stick with the facts."

The words took the brunette aback. Spencer was detaching herself emotionally from the situation in order to help her, and she knew she had to respect her decision. But she couldn't help but feel the sting of her rejection. "Of course. My apologies," she smiled sadly. "Um, well, after he did all that, he simply said he was going to meet up with an old friend and that he'd see us when he returned. But he never did. Haven't heard from him since."

"And this friend of his, do you know them? Have you been able to find them?"

"Yes," she said. "And, actually, you know her, too."

"Excuse me?"

Before Esme could answer, a face she hadn't seen in years appeared before them.

Spencer blinked a few times, thinking her mind was playing tricks on her. Before her was not only someone she knew, but it was the only person in her school she had ever allowed herself to grow close to. A person she had poured her heart out to many a night. Someone who had given her words of encouragement when she was ready to give up. And, as it turns out, wasn't a persona at all.

"Theo?" Spencer questioned, surprise splattered across her face. "What are you doing here? What the hell's going on?"

"I'm Carlisle's old friend, Spence," the raven-haired girl said. "I'm a vampire, too."

"You're joking, right? This has to be a really bad prank."

"I know this might be a lot to take in, but it's true, Spencer," Esme added. "Theo is a vampire, just like me and my family. And she's known Carlisle for longer than I have."

"I don't understand what's happening right now," Spencer declared, jumping from the couch as haphazard thoughts ran through her head. "How long have you guys known about me?" she asked Esme before turning back to Theo. "Did you tell them about me?"

"We didn't know about you until you came back here," Esme assured. "The fact that Theo knows you and us is pure coincidence, Spencer. I can promise you that much."

"It's true, Spence," Theo added. "I hadn't heard from Carlisle in years until he contacted me when he got to New York. I met you at Greenfield by pure chance. I promise there was no sinister plan at play here."

"This is... this is too much," she muttered. "You know things, Theo. You're the only person I've ever opened up to other than the Cullens. So, forgive me if this whole thing stinks of rotten bullshit. How am I supposed to trust that when you hid the fact that you were a vampire for two whole years?!"

"You're right," Theo admitted. "This does seem like it was planned, but I can assure you it wasn't. I think if I tell you about my past, you'll understand a bit better."

Theo, born Theodora Wright sometime in the 1700s in England, had been turned the night of her twenty-first birthday. She didn't remember much of her life before she was bitten, but she remembered that evening vividly. The vampire had been careless. He had stalked her through the shadows of the night, pouncing on her as she made her walk back home after working at her town's tavern. She remembered how his teeth felt as they sunk into her neck, the grip he held on her neck, and the coldness of his hands. She remembered being too scared to scream and how slowly her body had started to grow weak.

The man had almost drained her body of every drop of blood. Almost. Once he'd satiated his stomach, he'd left her on the street, for her body to be found the next day by an innocent passerby. He hadn't noticed that her heart was still beating. Faintly, but enough.

The next thing she remembered was waking up to excruciating pain and a ravenous hunger for blood she did not understand. Without much knowledge of what had happened to her, Theo went on a rampage, feeding off any human that she stumbled upon and leaving a bloody trail behind in her small village.

It was then that the Volturi had noticed her. Before they even knew of her ability—something she did not discover herself until then—they had been alerted of a vampire making a mess of a remote English village. They had sent for her to face Aro and his court to make a case for herself before they inevitably killed her.

She tried to fight them off, but they had sent Jane and Alec to fetch her, and their powers subdued her quickly. Before she knew it, she was facing the black-haired man and his coven. They asked her who had turned her and how many people she had hurt already, but she could not answer either question, for she did not know.

Theo was sure she was going to die when Aro sped toward her and grabbed her hand. At that moment, all she could think of was her little sister, and how she'd be all alone after she was dead.

One second, her eyes were staring into the red of Aro's, and the next, she was seeing the kitchen of her house. Hands were outstretched before her, but they weren't hers. They were Catherine's—there was a distinct scar on her right forearm that couldn't be mistaken for anyone else's. She was cooking the porridge Theo always made her, questioning the wind where her sister was and begging to their god that she hadn't been massacred by the monster that had wiped a quarter of their village.

"Who is that?" the ancient vampire had questioned. "How did you do that?"

"That's my sister," Theo answered. "I was just thinking about her, and that happened."

"What is it, Aro?" Caius asked, his interest finally piqued. "What did you see?"

"This girl is a clairvoyant," he shrilled. "A remote viewer, to be exact."

"Truly?"

"Indeed, Marcus," he said. "Did you know you have the ability to see through other's eyes, child?"

"I-I didn't," the girl stammered. "It's the first time that's happened."

"Well, I'd like to make you a deal."

Somehow, without even thinking twice about it, she had decided to join them. Aro had promised her sister wouldn't want for anything—they would send gold and give her lands so that she and her descendants would live a comfortable life. And, so, she agreed. They helped her master her craft, learning the intricacies of her ability at the same time as she did. In exchange, she helped them grow their empire.

Many years after she met Carlisle Cullen, and a whole new world had been opened for her.

One of the worst parts about being with the Volturi was the way they fed. After she had realized why she hadn't been able to control herself in the first year of her turning, Theo had grown disgusted with what she had done. What little she acquired during her time as part of the Volturi guard, she sent back to the families she had torn apart while she was a newborn.

When she met Carlisle, he told her about his way of life, and how he'd found that feeding off animals satiated the crippling hunger for blood. Though she'd be weaker, she wouldn't have to prey on other humans for her survival, nor would she have to participate in the Volturi's massacring feast.

Theo had been the only one who was swayed by the man's lifestyle and had promptly accepted his offer of joining him in the New World. Aro had not wanted to let her go. Her ability had become too valuable for their guard, and they almost refused to allow her departure. But Carlisle had made a case for her regarding free will and her rights as an individual, and the man had seen no opposition to letting her go. Maybe the blond had convinced him, or maybe Aro simply did not want to anger the other vampire. To that day, she had yet to know.

Still, she was able to leave her sanguinary life behind and start a new one in the colonies.

She had stayed with Carlisle for many decades, finding the shift toward a more vegetarian diet quite difficult. There had been many times she'd fallen off the wagon and fed off an innocent soil she'd cone upon on the street. She wasn't proud of it, but she knew it was part of the process.

It wasn't until she had completely taken to the diet that she had felt comfortable enough to venture off without Carlisle. Theo was only gone for small increments at a time. She traveled the land, running from one side of the country to the other as it developed. From coast to coast, she witnessed devastation and reinvention in every sense of the word.

Years kept passing by, and though she didn't spend them all with Carlisle, she always stayed in touch with the man who had given her a new chance in her eternal life.

Once he'd changed Edward, the two drifted apart. Carlisle was building a family, and Theo still craved adventure and to learn more of the advancing world. Yet, whenever they needed to see each other, they knew they would always have New York. It was the place she had first come to, and the one state she had a permanent residence.

Theo loved to learn. It was one thing that had not changed from the moment of her birth to the day of her welcoming to the undead. Still, with a young face, she found herself applying to schools and colleges over and over through the years. From medicine to the arts, she had earned as many degrees as she could. And that's how she came to meet Spencer in Greenfield Preparatory School.

She had come to Washington two years prior in need of a change of scenery and had picked the school out of a catalog by chance at the local library. She had been starting her junior year at the school when Spencer had entered her freshman year. Normally, she stayed out of everyone's way, making sure to not create any lasting relationship with any of the students, and no one bothered to change her mind.

Unlike the Cullens, Theo tried her best to fit in. Wearing blue contact lenses to hide her golden eyes and using makeup to make herself look younger and older as necessary. The last thing she wanted was to be the talk of the school. All she wanted was to learn, keep up to date with the latest advances, and create a record strong enough to enter another college on her own merits. She wanted to cruise undetected, blending into the background like a perfect wallflower.

But once Spencer Uley started, Theo couldn't help but gravitate toward the girl. She had a sort of magnetism that the vampire couldn't help but be pulled into. The Uley girl was a shy thing at first, unsure of her place at that school, and Theo was quick to bring her under her wing. She had built Spencer's confidence, and for the next two years, she made sure the girl knew how much she deserved to be at the school and all the accolades she had received. She'd already had a hard enough life; she deserved a big win.

"It was hard to leave you when I graduated," Theo sighed. "I'm still not sure what about you made me care so much, but I did. I know I didn't keep in touch much after, but I was always checking up on you, Spence. And then, everything happened with Carlisle."I truly couldn't believe the chances that you two would meet in such a small town," she continued. "I was over the moon when I learned you two got together. You just made sense together. Then, that Edward..."

"Theo," Esme reproached.

"What, Esme?" she said, turning her gaze to the woman. "You and I both know that if it hadn't been for Edward's savior complex and insecurities, none of you would have left. And you can't tell me otherwise."

"That's not what's in question here, Theo," Esme calmed. "Tell her what happened in New York."

"Right, well, the person Carlisle had gone to see before he disappeared was me," Theo said. "He wanted to see how you were doing since he'd be leaving indefinitely. When I asked where he was going, all he said was that he was going for his penance and that he'd look for me sometime in the future to ask about you again. "He came back a couple of months later, looking worse for wear. He hadn't been feeding much, and I could tell he had grown weaker," she recounted. "That was the last time I saw him. After he learned you had started to pick your life back up, he felt resolute in his decision to disappear. And I haven't heard from him since."

Spencer didn't know what to say. Her mind was reeling will all the information that had been given to her. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, everything had happened for a reason. In a twisted and convoluted way, the universe had conspired to bring everyone together in an unexplainable way, regardless of the heartache and sorrow that occurred in the journey. There was nothing logical about the intersecting of their lives, and yet, it had happened. Three people who should have never met in their lifetimes were so deeply woven into the fabric of each other's existence and had no idea.

"After a while of radio silence, I tried to search for him with my ability, but I couldn't quite make out where he was," the vampire continued. "When I don't have an approximate location, it's harder for me to determine where the person I'm seeing is. And I know the link would be too weak due to his physical state. But I kept focusing on him every day until I finally got it. "That's when I went to the Cullens in Ithaca and met Esme for the first time," she said. "I already knew where he had gone to, but I knew I was going to need backup. And, well, here we are now."

"I promise you, Spencer. This has all been a coincidence," Esme explained. "I know it seems strange, and the probability of things playing out this way is so low, but none of it was planned. It just happened this way."

"You know, I really miss the time when all I had to worry about was getting good grades," Spencer sighed defeatedly. "This is crazy. You understand that, right? This is absolutely nuts!"

"I know it is," Theo said, cautiously getting closer to Spencer. "But right now, Carlisle is in a cave, feeding off whatever rodent or critter gets close enough and punishing himself for what he did to you. You can hate him, Spencer. Hell, even I want to knock some blows into him for hurting you like he did. But you and I both know this is not the way he should live the rest of his life."

"I just... what am I supposed to do, huh?" Spencer exclaimed. "How am I the key to this whole fiasco? Carlisle is a grown man and made this decision for himself. He clearly doesn't want to be saved."

"He's in pain, Spencer," Esme remarked. "We can't just leave him like that. I understand he's done some horrible things, but he still needs help, whether he asks for it or not."

Anger ignited inside Spencer as the woman spoke. Everyone was worried about Carlisle, the immortal vampire that could only be destroyed by being ripped apart physically. And she understood. The last thing she'd ever want was for someone she loved and cared for to go through something as harrowing as he was.

But no one cared what he had put her through. The months she lost to heartbreak was a time she could never get back, nor could she undo the things she had done and said then. None of them had cared enough to pick her up from the ground when she was wasting away in bottles of alcohol and her tears. Not a call, not an email, not a letter or a text. Certainly not a rescue mission like they were planning for him.

"This has to be some type of bad joke," she laughed madly. "You don't need me to save him. Both of you can go wherever he is and bring him back."

"We already tried, Spencer," Esme admitted. "We knew how unfair it was to concern you with his problems and tried to get him to come home. But he wouldn't."

"He's not like Edward, Spence," Theo added. "He won't choose the easy way out by having the Volturi end his misery. He said he would suffer with hunger for the rest of eternity because that was less punishment than living without you."

Spencer was still learning about love. She could never claim to be an expert in the subject or to have the right answer to complicated matters of the heart. She couldn't even understand why, after all the pain and turmoil she had gone through, she felt the need to help Carlisle. As much as she was fighting it, she knew she'd agree in the end. The more time passed, the weaker her resolution grew.

"I know this is way too much to ask after how much we've all hurt you, Spencer," Esme pleaded, placing a soft hand on hers. Spencer knew if she had been human, Esme's eyes would be full of tears. They were filled with sadness and concern, and a silent supplication that only she could answer. "But Carlisle should at least be with the family. You can forget all about us after if you want."

She should have said no. She should have turned around and driven back home. She should have forgotten all about the Cullens and their wave of never-ending problems. There were so many things she should have done.

Instead, she sighed, feeling all of her resolve draining from her body. "Fine," she said, unable to deny the woman for any longer. "What do you want me to do?"