Fangirls, Chaos, and Weird Obsessions

(Published on September 1st, 2014)

Fangirls, Chaos, and Weird Obsessions

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~Piper is a fangirl:

Piper: OMG, IS THAT HARRY STYLES?! HE IS TOTES ADORBS!

Seriously, when did Piper TALK like that?

~Everyone talks like a fangirl:

Annabell Beth Katherine Louise Marie Ella Elizabeth Jacqueline Chase: OMG, ARE YOU LEO VALDEZ?!?!?! AJFKHGDVLBVLHBDSKHVBAW CALEO IS TOTES ADORBS, BUT ANNABELLEO IS CUTER!!!!!!!!!!! KISS ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SJHRGSKJFVKSVDUGSKV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Leo: Um...

Think about this: Would Rick Riordan make his characters talk like that?

Nico: NO.

Entire Freaking Universe: NO.

I rest my case.

~Logan Lerman, Alexandra Daddario, and Brandon T. Jackson is on everyone's dream cast list. Okay, just because they are in the actual movies, doesn't mean they are meant for the parts. I mean seriously, SINCE WHEN WAS GROVER BLACK?!?!

*Edit May 5th, 2022: I mean I guess Annabeth is black now too lol

~Not to be racist, but all the main characters are white. I mean seriously, be like Frank:

-He's Chinese

-Lives in Canada.

-Speaks French.

-Son of a Roman God.

-With Greek ancestry.

White people aren't the only people who exist you know.

~How Nico is described in fanfictions:

Nico: Hey, do you wanna go to a five star restaurant for a date?

Annabell Beth Katherine Louise Marie Ella Elizabeth Jacqueline Chase: OMG I TOTES DO! YOU ARE SO CUTE WITH YOUR SIX PACK AND OBSIDIAN EYES!!!!

How Nico really is:

Nico: Hey, I'm going to the graveyard to eat McDonald's so nobody follow me.

Annabell Beth Katherine Louise Marie Ella Elizabeth Jacqueline Chase: BUT I LOVE YOU!!!!

Nico: Um...

Anubis: Can I come with?

Nico: Sure....

Fanfictions:

Nico: I don't like people.

Books:

Nico: I don't talk to people that much because I want to hide my feelings.

Fanfics:

Nico: NO.

Books:

Nico: ..... *Silence*

Fanfics:

Nico: I like food.

Books:

Nico: I like food.

Everyone: WHO DOESN'T LIKE FOOD?!

~All the satyrs and nymphs ran away with the Hunters of Artemis and the Amazons because they are never mentioned.

~Honestly, I don't even know if Tyson got married to Ella because they are never in fanfics.

~Everyone already knows everything about CHB before they arrive.

Grover: Here is Camp Half-blood.

Annabell Beth Katherine Louise Marie Ella Elizabeth Jacqueline Chase: OMGZ, THIS IS CHB?! WHERE IS PERCY, I MUST MEET HIM, AND LEO IS GOING TO BE MY NEW HUSBAND, AND NICO IS BAE!!!!!! I MUST GO TO THE STABLES TO SEE BLACKJACK, AND CAN I AVOID MR. D? ACK, LOOK, IT'S CHIRON!!!!!! *faints*

Grover: Um....

Coach Hedge: DIEEEE!!!!!!!!

~Chaos stories: I guess I need to explain this. Typical Chaos story plot line

-Annabeth cheats on Percy.

-Chaos randomly pops up and offers Percy amazing powers, immortality, and to be the commander of his army.

-Percy has a greek letter for his new name like Epsilon or Alpha.

-Percy brings a bunch of dead people to his army. Like he ain't Nico guys.

-Percy goes back to camp after an impossibly long period of time like 500 years.

-Gaea and Kronos are rising: AT THE SAME TIME.

-Percy sees Annabeth.

-Annabeth sees Percy.

-Percy doesn't reveal himself.

-A bunch of almost Percabeth scenes.

-They save the world and get back together. THE END.

~Only Percy or children of the big three are betrayed, because nobody else has enough sass to be betrayed.

~Grammar.... In almost every fanfiction I see:

Soo un dey i wuz wolkin in da schul wen a coote boi booompped inta mii. he sed "hy mie nam is lio foldez annd yu bee a halfblud imma tak yu too da camp." he tuk mie haned annd luked streyt inta mie oshen bleu orbz. "yu bee coote." i seyz. den i fayntd. aftr dat wee wennt too da camp annd wee staartd daytin den i wuz claimed bie posiden annd atheenu, bute i'mm a legucy of apolo, artimyss, hairuh, haties, hefestus, afrodity, dionisius, hestya, zus, airyz, demeatr, and hicotay. den rachil sed a profesee, den i weent onn a kwest to savve da woorld frum guyah and croknows cuz imma bee swag.

~Fanfiction Title: The Chosen Ones

-What the summary says it's about: A new group of demigods shall stop the world from being destroyed by Nyx.

-What it's really about: Leo must save his taco shop before it's closed down by the health department.

Gir: TACOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Um, right...................... Moving on.

~Demeter and all her children are obsessed with cereal.

Person: I'm hungry.

Katie: EAT CEREAL.

Person: My boyfriend broke up with me.

Katie: EAT CEREAL.

Person: I heard Drew's pregnant.

Katie: EAT CEREAL.

~Iris and all her children are obsessed with rainbows, fruits, veggies, and sometimes My Little Pony.

*Council meeting in the Big House*

Chiron: Ugh, Butch is late... Again...

*Butch runs in through the wall wearing a rainbow MLP shirt*

Butch: EAT FRUITS AND VEGGIES MOFOS!!!! *Pulls out machine gun in each hand and starts shooting at the random places*

~People spell the character's names wrong like Conner Stoll and Frank Zang. Seriously, I've seen them spelt like that.

~When people use Harry Styles in their cast for Leo. I'm sorry, but Percy Jackson fandom is a place for awesome adventure fanfics, not annoying boy bands. But the Twilight fandom is over there!

~ "Annabeth had her long brown hair in a ponytail"

Me: *Throws the whole PJO series at you* READ THE DAM BOOKS!

~There's like 5 billion Percabeth and Jasper scenes, but no Frazel. Did they suddenly break up or...

(A/N: So here's another update, it's not really a cliffhanger, that last sentence is all I have to say about Frazel... Oh, and for you 1D fans out there, I'm sorry that you have a disease that makes you like their music. No, just kidding, I'm sorry if I offended you earlier, what I said about 1D was for humorous purposes only, I didn't mean to offend them or you. Not that I cared much for their feelings anyway... Okay, well bye my fluffy enchileadas!)