8. Night 1, Day 2

*Ellie's POV*

When I wake up again, I'm still in my mom's bed, but she's not here. I hear knocking.

I get up and pat my hair down. When I get to the door, I look through the peephole. It's Amanda and Nick.

I open the door, yawning.

"Hey, Babydoll. Were you still asleep?"

"Yeah. What time is it?"

"12:32. Your mom said you were out by 7:15."

"For the most part," I say, leaving out the nightmare. "What are you doing here?"

"Your mom wanted someone to check on you. She expected you to be asleep, but still. And...I knew you don't wanna hear anything about the case unless we found her, but we found a phone. If that helps. And...we have to ask. Fin said you said something about one of the perps having a gun to your side?"

Oh shit.

"Tell my mom and you're dead." I turn and walk more into the apartment, letting them inside.

"She already knows, Babe."

Damn it. I turn back around. "Okay, what about it?"

"Did he touch your dress?" Nick asks.

"Well, he kinda had to. But I took the dress off and scrunched it in a bag then hung it back up."

"We may still get some prints. Can we have it?" Amanda asks, so nicely it sounds fake.

"Will I get it back? It was so hard for me to hide that money from my mom."

"I understand."

"You mess it up, I will kill you."

"I get it, Babydoll."

"I was talking to him," I remark. Amanda laughs.

I head to my room and take the dress by the hanger. Nick is careful not to let it touch anything. "I'll take it out to the car," he tells us. "Get her prints."

"Prints?"

"This is your dress. We need your prints to rule them out.

I roll my eyes. "So do I have to go down there?"

"Just stamp."

Ugh. My fingers are gonna be black.

"So, what are you up to today?" Amanda asks casually.

"Nothing. Thinking about the case. Nothing."

"Don't do that. It'll only make you crazy." Classic detective advice.

"Well what am I supposed to do?"

"Don't you have a boyfriend that Fin doesn't like? Uhh...Logan?"

Logan?! "Boyfriend? He's not my boyfriend. And how does Fin know him?"

"He and Munch went to ask him if he knew anything. Apparently he's a punk."

"He is not. Fin just says so because he was all cop and he's an overprotective father when it comes to boys."

"Good luck convincing Fin of that. He definitely doesn't like him," she says, almost jokingly. But I know she's serious.

"Why? What'd he say?"

"Apparently douchebaggy stuff."

"And what did Munch say?"

"That he was flipping his lid on that poor boy. But anyways, call him up. See if you two can do something today. Get your mind off of all this."

"But all we're gonna end up talking about is Ashley!"

"Then...kiss him." She gives me a shrug with a smirk.

I give her an incredulous look.

"Look, I was your age once. I'm under the assumption that call from a week ago was him inviting you and then you have had a crush on him for like ever. Then you and your friends just had to go and got dresses and all dolled up for it. And that half hour alone with him that Fin was definitely not a fan of hearing was you two kissing and you had butterflies and-"

"Amanda. Chill. You went all teenager for a second. And how the hell did you know that?"

"Your boy. He told Fin you were with him for about a half hour but other than that, you girls were together."

"Oh. Well. Yeah. Go back to work."

"Go call your boy."

"Now he's my boy?"

"Just as much you're my Babydoll."

I smile. "I think I'll shower first."

She laughs. "Do that. Later, Babydoll."

I say goodbye and close the door.

After my shower, I do call him, not prepared enough for questions.

"Ellie?" is how he starts the conversation.

"That's what the Caller ID says, correct?"

"How are you? I got interrogated about the party."

I feel the heat behind my eyes again. I had no intentions of crying. And no warning.

I hold my breath for a couple seconds, then answer.

"Alright. I guess. Better than yesterday."

"Oh," he says. Well, what else is this poor guy supposed to say? "Wanna talk about it?"

"Not really. But I think I should."

"Should?"

"My mom works with shrinks. I've gotten to hear all sorts of analyzation things and talking apparently helps."

"You're way to smart for a 14 year old."

"Am I? If I was, I wouldn't have stayed out so late."

"You can't blame yourself for this, El."

I feel a tear slide down my cheek. "I know," my airy voice manages.

"Where are you right now?" he asks.

"Home. Alone."

"Why? You should not be alone today." His voice is full of concern. And that unintentional pity. But I'm still okay with it.

"I was at SVU all day yesterday. I'm good at interrogations, I learned. Maybe I should be a cop. So there's a plus."

I can barely keep it together.

"Where do you live? I don't want you being alone."

"I...I'll...I'll just text it to you okay? I...my phone's dying."

I hang up, tears coming at full force. After about a minute, I text my address to him. Immediately, I get an "I'll be right over" text. And 15 minutes later, an "I'm here. Let me in" text.

I look at myself in the mirror one more, having decided I look back-to-normal enough.

I open the door and smile. I know he's thinking I'm on the edge, so all I expect is sympathy and pity.

"How's the phone battery?" he jokes.

"Fine," I say, my voice stopping short. I guess I can't talk much.

"Come in," I whisper.

I watch him as he comes in, looks around, as everyone does. Nobody I know lives in an apartment. Logan would never know what it's like. My whole home is one room to him. Not that I would ever care. I like my home. I like apartments. They're cosy. More personal.

"Want water or anything?" I ask.

"I'm good," he says coolly.

I nod, grabbing my water off the table. "Sit anywhere."

I sit on the right side of the couch, the side against the wall. This is always my spot.

He sits closely next to me. It's not him, making me uncomfortable, however. It's the fact I feel so jittery and unable to talk. After my dream last night, I quickly grew a - hopefully temporary - over-attachment to my mom. And she's not here. When I was little, I was sort of the same way. Very clingy to Mommy, like most kids are to a parent. But with me, I got very anxious and quiet when she wasn't with me. Almost as if I didn't trust talking to others.

He touches my hand. I jump. Immediately, I apologize.

"No need. I came over here expecting you to be curled up in a ball in the corner."

"I'm about this close to doing that," I manage.

"Go for it. I've got nothing better to do," he says.

"You should still be cleaning up that party."

"I literally took a rake and pushed everything into one pile. Then it went in trash bags."

"Nice."

Thinking about the party makes me think about Ashley. Us all dancing. Having fun. And who knows when I'll get to do that again.

*Olivia's POV*

At 7:12AM, my phone starts to ring. I reach over my daughter and grab the phone off the table. She doesn't even budge.

"Benson," I whisper.

"Liv," says...Cragen. I think. It's too early. "You're late for work."

"I know. I'm sorry. I just...couldn't get up. I don't want to leave Ellie." I admit to him.

"I know it's hard, Liv. But if another case comes up we need you. And, if it helps, we found a cell phone at the warehouse Thompson told us about."

"Okay?" I ask. How does this help me? "Are there prints?"

"Yes. We took the prints. And we have to call Paige and Trent so we can match alleles. We would like to get Ellie's too, as a precaution."

"Can this wait? She's sleeping next to me right now. I want her to sleep for way longer than she has. She had a rough night."

"Liv. I know it's hard. You want to protect her. You don't want to leave her. But...we need you down here."

"I'm not even on the case," I try one more time.

"You can help us with information and phone calls and the Larssons. And if these men get another girl, you can work that case."

"Okay. Fine, I'll be there when I get there. But I'm not dragging my daughter back into this," is how I hang up the call.

I shift onto my side and look at my baby. She looks so peaceful right now. I want to stay with her until she wakes. I want to make her breakfast and sit with her and watch TV or a movie and play a board game or something.

But I know I have to get up. My feet slip off the bed, careful not to wake her.

~*~*~*~*~*~

I haven't done anything today. I got up 6 hours ago for nothing. I can't even go with Rollins or Amaro to my own home to retrieve Ellie's dress.

When they return, I bounce up out of my seat.

"How is she?" I ask, too urgently.

"Fine, Liv. She was asleep still," Amaro replies calmly. "And she had enough Ellie in her to warn me not to ruin this dress or she'd kill me."

I smile. That's my Ellie.

"I'll send these to the lab," Amaro says.

I can't help but ask Amanda again. "Are you sure she's okay?"

"Yes. Look, I know you're scared but-"

"I just didn't want her to be alone today." I'd say.

"If it helps, I told her to call Lo- I mean, Jordyn today."

"Logan?" I hear Fin say. "Did I ever tell you that kid's a rich punk?"

"Well, I retract what I said. I just want to be with her today." My Ellie. I wonder if she actually did call that boy. She's never been one to open up to someone, so that should be interesting.

"Why?"

"She had a really bad nightmare last night. I woke up and she was screaming so loud. It was...ear-piercing. I went and got her and she wouldn't stop crying."

"My poor Babygirl," Amanda says, sitting. Her face is full of concern.

I lean my elbows on the table and rest my forehead on my hands. "It actually scares me she screamed so...bad. I can't get it out of my head. Or maybe it was what she dreamed about."

"Which was?"

"From what I could gather, she got all the way home, but then the men grabbed her."

"Liv, she had a nightmare. I'm sure it's just her mind on overdrive," Cragen says in passing. "Would be surprised if she slept through the night."

"She never screamed like that when she was little and had nightmares."

"She was never in this situation."