15

Kyrin

The plane ride to Texas went by too quick for my likings. Phoebe hated flying and if I was completely honest, I did as well.

When we landed, I texted Carmen and let her know that I had made it. Phoebe looked at me skeptical when I didn't move for a moment.

She sighed. "Come on sis, we then came too far to turn back now."

Nodding, I got off the plane and called Janet. She answered on the second ring and music filled my ears from her end. "Hey baby. You made it?"

"Yeah. We just landed." I lowered my voice to a mumble as I walked into the airport behind Phoebe. "Baby pray for me."

Janet's chuckle filled my ears. "Already let one into the atmosphere for you baby."

"I know you're in the studio. I can hear the music, so I'll talk to you later okay?"

"Are you sure? I can talk if you want to."

I shook my head as I adjusted my jacket. "No baby, it's okay. Really. I gotta go get my bags anyways. I'll call you tonight."

"Okay, text me when you make it to your house please." Her voice took one of worry and I knew it was because she cared.

"I will. I will. Now go make music. We will talk later."

She mumbled. "Ok, bye baby."

"Bye babes." I hung the phone up and put it in my pocket. I realized P was smirking at me and I asked. "Girl what?"

"Cuties!" Phoebe made kissy faces and I rolled my eyes as we went to the baggage claim.

"We can be cuties all day, but you know the rule once we step foot into that house. Don't bring it up."

She nodded. "You know I wouldn't sister."

Thankfully, mine came rolling out right on time and I grabbed it off the belt. P had to wait for a moment, but finally, hers did as well.

We made our way outside and I realized Phoebe didn't have any car keys. "Where's your car?"

She looked at me weirdly before sighing. "Oh. See, that's the thing. My cars at home. Embers coming get us."

"Excuse me?"

Before Phoebe could reply a silver Dodge Charger pulled up in front of us.

I watched as Ember got out of the car and came running up. She squealed and hugged Phoebe. "Hey sissy!"

"Hey Emmy Bean." P greeted back as happily as ever.

"Hey Sis." Ember acknowledged my presence.

My face stayed firm as I sent her a head nod. 

Phoebe sighed as we put our bags in the trunk. I got in the backseat with no hesitation, I didn't want to be any closer to that girl than need be.

My phone buzzed and I looked down.

Superstar 💘If something happens, call me. Doesn't matter what time, I'm here to listen. Even if that means me flying down there. K?

To: Superstar 💘Kk. I'll call tonight and tell you everything anyways. Promise!

The drive to the house was one of silence. With the radio providing some hip hop and r&b jams in the background from time to time.

When we made it to the house, I hesitated to get out of the car. My worst feelings were consuming my soul and I sat in sunken fear for a moment.

A knock on the window made me snap out of it. It was P. "Coming?"

I nodded my head and got out the car. Grabbing my bag, I drug it to the door. Phoebe opened the front door and my fathers infamous cooking immediately hit my senses.

Ember yelled. "Daddy! Whatchu in hea cookin'?!"

I heard footsteps and my father turned the corner. "Well, when Phoebe gets here—." He stopped when we met eye contact and his smile widened. "There's daddy's princess!"

Smiling back, I walked into his embrace. "Hey daddy."

"I made your favorites. Meat loaf, mash potatoes, gravy on the side. Green beans and lemonade." He cheesed and I giggled.

"You remembered? Aw. Thanks daddy." We let out of the embrace as he smiled at me in pride.

"Ya know your daddy's pride and joy right?" My father always told me this. He made sure that it was one thing I didn't forget.

I was his oldest child and his 'first true definition of love'. Can't say the same about my mother.

"Well, dinners ready whenever y'all are ready to eat. Go have a seat at the table." My father announced as he dismissed himself to go set the table. Ember went to help.

Walking over to the table, I went to sit before my anxiety hit me like a brick to my stomach. Excusing myself, I headed to the restroom. I closed the door behind me and put my hands on the sink as I took deep breaths.

"Okay Kyrin..." I looked at myself in the mirror. "You can do this. It's simple. Really simple. Just fake it til you make it. You don't have to go all out with it. You're grown and you're entitled to feel how you feel. Don't let them get to you. This is just a test. Don't freak out. Don't freak out. Do not... freak out."

Nodding to myself, I closed off my pep talk. Grabbing my phone, I texted J.

To: Superstar 💘I made it to the house. I'll call you tonight.

Washing my hands, I walked out of the restroom and went to go back down the steps.

Before I could, my old bedroom door caught my attention. The door was shut, and my curiosity overtook my senses. Opening the door, I stepped inside.

Everything was the same as the day I left it. All the posters on the wall, all of my collages of my friends and I. When I moved out, I thought they'd use it for other purposes. Guess I thought wrong.

Papers were on my bed and I walked over and picked them up. They were hospital bills for Joanna.

My face furrowed as I looked at the dates on the papers. These were all papers from months back, but none from recently. Knowing the hospital, they had probably just failed to send them.

"Ya know..." I jumped and turned around only to see Ember. Rolling my eyes, I turned back around and went back to looking at the papers. "It's been years since we've seen each other, and I can't help but to think you still aren't my biggest fan."

I ignored her and she sighed.

"What is your problem with me?" She questioned only to be ignored again. Emery scoffed. "You'd swear that I had stolen your money."

Her saying that made me speak as I continued to look through the papers. "No, but that's funny because you did steal my mother and something else from me though. So I'd say that's pretty equivalent if not more valuable than money, but hey we are talking about Joanna."

"Don't talk about my momma like that." Her voice got firmer than before.

Shooting a glance her way, I saw her fists were clenched. "Still sensitive about ya momma, I see." I chuckled as I placed the papers back on the bed. "Unclench your damn fists. Standing there looking like the Arthur meme."

Ember huffed. "You ain't been here, aight? You ain't seen what she's been going through. Throwing up and shit. Night sweats. Headaches. She wasn't eating. They had to put a tube in our mothers stomach to make her eat. Two months we went through hell. Where the fuck were you at then, huh?"

"Oh please. Save ya damn sob story for your prayers. You don't need to be speaking to me at all about night sweats and throwing up."

"She has AIDS!"

"Yet you act like she's dead! She laid down with dogs and got up with flees!" I exclaimed as I turned and faced her. "I'm here alright, so leave me alone about it. Shit."

"Yeah. Two months after she gets out the hospital you show up, right? Tuh. Perfect timing."

My eyebrow lifted. "Huh? Say that again."

"You heard what I said Kyrin. Stop playing fucking stupid."

I shook my head. "No. No I didn't actually. When did she get out the hospital again?"

"Two months ago."

Pissed was an understatement at the moment. Did my sister and father really lie to get me to Texas? Was this woman not dying?

"Well I can't do shit about the two months I missed. Sorry not sorry sis."

Ember shook her head and scoffed. "You are such a damn asshole Kyrin. I swear I question if you were raised in this family or by a pack of damn wolves sometimes."

She walked out the door and I turned on my feet looking through the papers again.

The dates not being recent wasn't just a coincidence.

This hag wasn't dying. I had been bamboozled into bringing my ass back to Texas.

Chuckling to myself, I nodded. If this is the game they wanted to play, then I was all for it.

Walking down the steps, I walked into the dining room and saw that my mother had joined the gang at the table.

Her face lit up when she saw me. "Hey mommas baby."

Faking a smile, I went over and hugged her. "Hey mommy. How're you feeling?"

"I'm doing okay sweetheart. Feeling better as days go by. How about you? How've you been?"

I went over and sat by Phoebe. "I've been great actually. Sorry that I just popped up like this."

My mother nodded. "Actually, I'm happy that you came down. What made you come?"

"Well, I heard that you'd been sick so I had to come and make sure you were okay myself. Life's too short to hang on to old feelings." I replied back smiling.

My eyes glanced over at Phoebe and Ember who seemed shocked as hell.

"I agree. So how long are you staying?" My mother asked me.

"Four days." I announced. "We should spend the day together tomorrow. I'm sorry I've been gone so long. Ya know, hearing that the doctor had put you on a 48 hour notice really hurt me."

"Okay lets pray!" Phoebe broke in suddenly as she laid her hands out on each side of her, signaling to join hands.

Joanna frowned. "48 hour notice? What are you talking about?"

Phoebe interjected again. "Bow your heads."

"What is she talking about?" My mother asked the table. No one answered and she looked at my father. "Nathan, what the hell is going on?"

My father put his head down in what seemed as guilt. The table got silent.

I glanced around confused. "So... You aren't on a 48 hour notice?"

Joanna sighed. "No sweet pea, I'm not."

Picking my fork up, I began speaking. "Well then, God is great. God is good. Let's thank God for this lovely food. Amen. Eat up family."

No one moved and Phoebe looked at me. "We didn't know how else to get you here."

My mother spoke. "Wait, I think we should have a conversation about this. Cause I really am lost."

"Long story short, I thought you were dying Joanna. You aren't. So therefore, your daughter and your ex husband lied to my face and over the phone. It's no problem though, it's on me because I shouldn't have expected loyalty from them to begin with." I let out in irritation.

Phoebes face morphed into one of anger. "Well, let's not act like you would have came if we told you the truth! You hate mom because she left and you hate Ember for some unknown ass reason."

I scoffed. "Shut the hell up! Ember knows why we don't get along. Don't you Ember?"

Ember put her head down as she nodded sluggishly. "Yeah, I do."

"Alright then. Quit speaking on shit you don't know anything about Phoebe. How about that?"

"It's probably some dumb ass reason!" Phoebe let out in anger.

"Language. Don't speak to each other like that! We didn't allow it back then and we won't allow it now." Our mother interjected and they quieted down for a moment.

Shaking my head, I spoke. "Alright Pheobe. Since you are so dang stuck on knowing the reason—."

"No." Ember cut me off. "Stop Kyrin."

"No because maybe if I say this, everyone will shut up and just maybe— just maybe will I get over it. We were supposed to be babysitting you Phoebe, and you had went to sleep. Ember and I snuck out and went to a party. We didn't know at the time, but it was a college party. A dude gave me a drink while Phoebe was elsewhere and next thing I knew, I woke up to a bloody body. The end."

The room became tenser than I thought it could and I was purely unbothered by that fact.

Ember spoke softly for she had begun crying. "I-I went up the stairs looking for her. Three boys had came running past me. Something wasn't right and I knew it. So I um..." She paused as she brushed some of her hair back. "I checked the bathroom and she wasn't in there. Then I checked the bedrooms and I found her laying there. Cov-covered in blood and unconscious. I shouldn't have left you Kyrin. I'm so sorry. I should have stayed with you."

"You found me?" I asked softly. "You told me that you left. You told me that Langston had cleaned me up and brought me home."

"No, I found you. I just didn't have the heart to tell you. Langston and I got you home and I cleaned you up. He helped me put you in the bed and the next morning— I don't know. I guess I saw the way you looked at me. You already hated me, and I just let you assume."

I shook my head as I stood up and grabbed my phone. "I'm leaving."

My journey went blank for a moment when I heard footsteps following behind me.

"Stop running away! Damn! That's all you fucking do!" Phoebes voice shouted from behind me and it caused me to stop walking. "Talk about the shit Kyrin! Stop holding this shit in!"

Whipping around, I yelled. "You don't get to tell me to talk about anything! You didn't feel it! You didn't go through it! I did! I lost a child! Nobody else!"

Everyone's faces dropped at my revealing and I knew that I shouldn't have said it the moment it fell from my tongue. Wiping the tears that I let fall harshly, I turned on my feet and began walking.

To where? I'm not really sure.

I just knew that I needed to get away from them.