Eighteenth

Kai

It was really hard for me to say those things to Kyungsoo and not feel some sort of regret afterwards. I mean, I loved him and I hated to see him so upset, especially knowing it was partially my fault. But I meant it all. I had to have to think and clear my head before I completely forgave him. 

Another week flew by and I before I knew it, it was that time. I was honestly dreading it, especially with everything else that I was already trying to sort through. That night, I tucked Taeyoung into bed as Lay waited outside for me. Sehun was in the bathroom, as he had agreed to spend the night with her while I was gone.

"Don't you miss him? Cause I sure do," she said as she adjusted her head on her pillow, pouting a little. It hurt me to hear her say that, especially knowing I let her grow so attached to him.

"I know you do," I said, pulling the covers over her. "I do, too." The second part came out as a whisper and she just sighed a little. "But when people hurt us, we need time to make sure we're okay before we forgive them. So, that's what I'm doing."

"Does that mean you'll forgive him and he'll come back?" she asked, her eyes suddenly going wide with anticipation.

I couldn't help but chuckle. "Probably," I said. "Just not right now."

"How much longer?"

"I don't know. Until I feel better."

"Well, hurry up and feel better." She tucked her blanket underneath her arms.

"Okay, I'll try," I said, laughing a little as I stood up from her bed. "Now you get some sleep. Sehun will be right out here if you need him, okay?" She nodded her head and yawned. I headed towards the door and turned the lights off. "I love you," I whispered, probably so quietly that she couldn't hear me because she didn't say anything back.

I walked down the hall and Sehun was now sitting on the couch. "You don't have to do this," he said with a serious and concerned expression on his face. "You can back out. It's not too late."

"No, I can't," I said, grabbing a light coat out of the closet. "If he goes out there alone and dies, I'll never forgive myself."

"Kai, his life isn't your responsibility," he said, standing up on his feet now. "Do you know how many times he's put your life in danger without a second thought? Why do you owe him anything?"

"Because someone has to look out for us, Sehun," I said, stopping what I was doing so I could turn around and face him. "No one out there gives a single fuck about us and I know how it feels to be alone, how scary it is. And yeah, he's fucked up before and I don't know why I feel so compelled to help him. I just do and I won't let him go get himself killed now."

"So, what? You'll take the bullet for him?" I was silent for a moment after that. I finished putting my coat on and headed over to the door. 

"Let's just hope I don't have to," I said, briefly glancing back at him before opening the door. I stepped outside and jogged down the steps, seeing Lay standing at the bottom. 

"Hey," he said with a nervous smile. "You ready?"

I sighed and looked down at the ground for a moment. "Yeah, let's go," I said after picking my head up. Then, I followed after him, heading into the dark of the night. 

Kyungsoo

Baekhyun was nice enough to come let me stay with him for the night after what happened with Kai. I didn't think I would be able to face my parents. I was pretty distraught to say the least, but he did his best to cheer me up and give me hope. 

"Maybe you need to just give it some time. I'm sure he'll come around," he said as he brought me a hot cup of tea from the kitchen.

"You should have heard him Baekhyun. I don't think he will," I replied. He just looked at me with sympathetic eyes. "He sounded so hurt, and I know that I caused him all that pain, so it's not like I can blame him or be mad at him. I just wish I could take everything back, you know?"

"I know and it'll be alright," he said as he rubbed my back gently. "Everything will work out for the best. I think he really loves you still, which is why he's so hurt, but at least that means there's a good chance he'll come around again." I tried to smile, hoping he was right. 

About a minute or two later, I knock on the front door caused me to jump a little. Baekhyun and I looked at each other in confusion before getting off the couch and going to see who it was. I was surprised to see little Taeyoung standing there once I opened the door.

"Soo!" she exclaimed even though she looked tired, running into my arms.

"Taeyoung, what are you doing here?" I asked, bending down to meet her height.

"I don't know," she said, sleepily rubbing her eyes. "Sehunnie just woke me up and said we needed to come see you. I don't know why you made Kai oppa sad, but you need to fix it. He misses you and so do I." It made my heart ache more to see the sadness written on her face. I stood up, taking her into my arms and hugging her close.

"I miss you guys, too," I said, trying to hold back any tears. "And I don't know if we'll ever get back together, but I'll always be here for you no matter what, okay?" I said once I pulled back. She looked at me and nodded. I hugged her again in reassurance. 

Just then, the car door slammed shut and Sehun rushed over to us, looking rather panicked. "There you are," he said, sounding slightly out of breath. "I drove to your house and your parents said you weren't there and that might be at one of your friend's house. Then, of course, I didn't know where any of those places were, so your dad had to call around. God, it was a hassle.

 "What's wrong? Did something happen?" I asked as I stood and Taeyoung clinged to me.

"I just got a call from Lay, Kai's friend," he said. "Something happened to Kai while they were out tonight." 

My heart began to race instantly. 

"He got stabbed. Kai got stabbed."