05 • staring issues

THE WALKING DEAD- a rick grimes fanfic story -

GREENE FARM 📍

season 2, episode 2 (part 4) & 3

   The sun was slowly but surely beginning to set, and Hershel began checking on Carl every 10 minutes to make sure his heartbeat and blood pressure were okay. 

I was beginning to get more worried the longer Shane and Otis were out getting supplies, the longer they were out the longer Carl was at risk. Lori and Rick were beginning to get even more worried, and I tried my best to keep them calm.

I sat on the porch stairs, my feet on the grass as I stared out at the setting sun, looking out into the field that Rick was running through hours ago. I let out a sigh, closing my eyes— instantly opening them once memories flash through my mind. I shake my head, the memories quickly fading away.

Otis being out didn't sit right with me, especially with a stranger we didn't truly know. I was worried he would get killed or hurt, would show up a bit, scratched, or anything.

I'm snapped out of my thoughts when I hear the screen door open and close, a body sits right next to me, and I turn my head to see Rick carefully looking at the sunset with me.

"I'm sorry," Rick sighed, continuing to look at him, my eyebrows furrowing in confusion, wondering what he could be sorry for, "For Lori, she's just-"

"No. Don't apologize, I get it. Her son was shot, I... I get it." I carefully said, Rick looked over at me with a tired look, his eyes were careful, soft but I could tell Rick was exhausted.

"I hope you know I trust you," Rick mumbled, I turned away from him and calmly looked out in front of me. "Just... please make sure to do everythin' you can. To save him."

I feel Rick's eyes glancing at the side of my face, I bite my bottom lip as I'm lost in thought. But I begin to slowly nod my head with a sigh, "I will," I turn to look at Rick, and we both softly gaze at each other, "I promise." I whispered out.

Our eyes never falter as we continue to stare at one another, I offer Rick a cheeky smile before turning my red face away from him. I look down at my combat boots, stomping them on the grass a few times before standing up with a groan.

"I need to check up on Carl. And you," I wag my finger at him playfully, "you need to rest, let's go." I offer Rick my hand, I get a bit of deja vu once I offer him my hand, reminding me of the dreams where he's the one that offers his hand to me.

Rick stared at my hand, slowly placing his soft hand in mine. I use my strength to help him up, he groans and tightly closes his eyes as he stands to his feet. His chest bumps against me and I tumble a bit before he places his hands on my shoulders to keep me upright. 

"Oops, Sorry." Rick laughed, and I smiled and shook my head. Once I look up at him I truly notice our height differences, my head right at his shoulders. I look away from Rick, taking ahold of his arm and leading him back inside the house.

Me and Rick walk into Carl's room, I notice candles lit up around the room as the sun sets. Rick carefully leans against the wall and I sit next to Carl. I grab the blood pressure cuff and the stethoscope, adjusting it to Carl's thin arm and placing the stethoscope in my ears. I can hear the bumping of Carl's heart, I begin squeezing to determine his pressure.

I hear more footsteps behind me, I quickly turn to see Lori and Hershel standing in the door frame. I turn my gaze back down to the blood pressure, paying closer attention.

"How's his pressure?" Hershel asks me, I don't answer him as I listen closely. I let out a sigh, the stethoscope around my neck. I look up at Hershel, seeing Rick and Lori give me a painful look.

"His pressure is dropping again. I don't think we can wait much longer." I sigh, Hershel grabs the equipment and listens as well, giving me a nod. Lori and Rick are both leaning against the wall, their heads drifting over to their boy as they hear my words.

"Take some more— Whatever he needs. Then— I'm gonna go." Rick panted out with his arm pointed in my direction, Lori and I gave him a confused look.

"Go? Go where?" Lori lets out tiredly, I watch as Rick and Lori stare at each other, the fire behind their eyes as the tension in the room grows.

"He said five miles. They should be long back by now. Somethings gone wrong." Rick breathed out, he was beginning to pace the room, and sweat was dripping from his pale face. I couldn't help but feel a twinge of worry once Rick opened up the idea of something going wrong.

I hear Lori loudly scoff, "Are you insane? You're not goin' after them." I hate to say it, but Lori was right, It's beyond risky for Rick to leave, due to him giving so much blood he'd probably pass out, or something else could happen, and that is the last thing we need.

"Lori's right, Rick. I'd be way too risky, and Carl needs you here." I objected, Rick and Lori turned to me, Lori sending me a grateful nod and Rick shaking his head trying to plead his case.

"No— No—"

"Rick, listen to them." Hershel sighed out, Rick only continued to shake his head.

"If they got into trouble—"

"You're in no condition to do anything about it. You've given too much blood. You're barely on your feet. You wouldn't make it across the yard." Hershel declared. Rick's pace slowed as he leaned against the wall once more, but Rick was ready to go out fighting, not wanting to believe he was weak.

"Something happened, I have to go." He groans out, I place my hand on Rick's shoulder, speaking to him calmly.

"I'll go find them," I offered, Rick's eyes widened and he quickly shook his head tiredly, softly saying, "Lia, no, no. You're not goin'." I hear Hershel stand from the chair, it screeches against the floor, and his voice booms beside me.

"Nola, No—"

"Damnit Hershel!" I frustratedly yell out, I turn my head towards his. "I am not weak. I am fine. You need to realize that." I spit out in his face, Hershel's eyes widen and he quickly backs away from me.

"You need to stop hoverin', I am fine. I will be fine. You need to let me do what I gotta do, and let me heal the way I wanna heal." My voice comes out deep and raspy, my eyes glare into his.

"You aren't goin', No one is goin'," Hershel ordered, Rick and Lori, watched the both of us, Lori nodded her head and looked over at Rick.

"Your place is here," Lori tells Rick finally, she looks at me and nods in my direction, "So is Nola's." I shake my head and sigh, running my hand through my hair.

"If Shane said he'll be back, he'll be back. He's like you that way." There's a certain look in Lori's eyes as she talks about Shane, something I can't quite describe.

"I can't just sit here," Rick growls out, Lori's eyes twitch in anger, and she takes a step towards Rick, fire blazing behind her look.

"That's exactly what you do! If you need to pray, or cry or tell God he's cruel, you go right ahead, but you're not leavin', Rick." Lori cries out, Rick is dead silent as he stares at his wife.

 "Carl needs you- here. And I can't do this by myself. Not this one. I can't — I can't..." Tears begin to fall from Lori's eyes, Rick pulls her into a tight hug whispering his apologies. I turn to look at Hershel, shaking my head and storming out of the room.

•••

I was sat in a chair on the front porch, claiming it as my spot since it's where I've sat since I've been here. The sun had finally set and the moon was now in the sky. Shane and Otis still hadn't shown and Hershel was losing patience, Carl was slowly declining the longer we waited.

Maggie sat beside me, and we both sat in silence. Hershel had told her about me yelling at him earlier, so she's been "checking" on me since then, trying to see if I'll tell her anything.

"I'm fine Maggie." I groan out, she looks over at me alarmed, I glance in her direction and sigh.

"Look, I did raise my voice at Hershel but I'm just exhausted, and I'm sorry but I'm just trying to help and y'all keep watching my every move, tellin' me what I can or can't do." I voice out, Maggie looks at me and nods her head, letting me know she understands.

"We were just lookin' out for you, since Atlanta, you tellin' us what you saw, what you had to do," Maggie explains, and I don't stop her, knowing deep down I need to hear this.

"We understand Nola, we just want to protect you. I don't understand what you saw or had to do, 'cause I'm not you, I didn't go to Atlanta," I look at my feet, brushing my hair behind my ears as Maggie continued talking.

"Nola, I'm sorry for holdin' you back, I am. But I can tell you are scared, you're forcing yourself back out there cause you feel like you have to prove us somethin'," Maggie shakes her head, I bite my tongue holding back my words and letting her finish.

"You don't have to prove anything, Nola. We know you're strong, you're just not in the right state of mind to go out there yet. You need to— to let it all out, you've been holding it in." Maggie finishes, I take in her words and sigh, nodding to her words.

"Yeah," I whisper, "You're right. I—I can't get over it. What I saw," I let out a shaky breath, tears filling my eyes as I remembered everything. "Every time I close my eyes I see it, I hear it, I feel it." Maggie's green eyes softly look into mine, I had never told Maggie the full story of what happened, never a clear story at that.

"I'll open up about it soon, one day. But for now, y'all need to know that I'm gonna do things whether y'all support it or not." I tell Maggie finally, and Maggie nods. We both look at each other once more before hearing an unfamiliar voice, I sit up alarmed by the two random figures walking through the grass up to the porch.

"So do we ring the bell? I mean it looks like people live here." I hear the first voice, I look and see a tall, skinny, Asian man with a baseball cap on his head, another guy who was the same height but bigger. I couldn't quite get a good look at his face due to the fact he was turned away from me.

"We're past this kinda stuff, aren't we?" The other man sighs out, "Having to be considerate."

"Did you close the gate up the road when you drove in?" Maggie calls out, I look over at her with a confused expression, who were these people?

Both of the men flinch and turn their heads towards Maggie's voice, being met with both of our faces. The Asian man steps forward, "Uh, hi. Yes, we closed it." Maggie and I both stare at them, and that's when I notice the other man, he has a blanket over his shoulders, and his eyes droopy, something obviously wrong.

"Hello. Nice to see you again. We met before briefly." The man with the baseball cap says to Maggie, I raise my eyebrows as the man stutters, I look over at Maggie to see her battling a smile.

"And uh, you— I haven't met you." I turn to see the shy man pointing at me, he licks his lips, rubbing his hands on his pants. He looks away from me, shaking his head and looking over at Maggie again.

"Look we came to help," The shy man's friend coughs out, my direction going towards him. "There's anything we can do?" He asks us. I look down to notice a bloody bandage on his arm, also noticing how sweaty he is my eyes widen and I place my hand on Maggie's shoulder to try and push her back in her chair.

"It's not a bite," The bandaged man reassures, "I cut myself pretty badly though." He looks down at his injured arm, I stand from my seat and make my way towards him.

"I can take care of it." I offer, and he gives me an appreciative nod. I place my hand on his shoulder, leading him towards the door.

"I'll tell them that you're here," Maggie says as she stands as well. All four of us walk inside together.

"We uh, we have some painkillers and antibiotics. I already gave him some, if Carl needs any." The man with the baseball cap tells us softly, I kindly smile at him and lead him inside the house, "Come on inside, I'll fix up your friend and we'll make you something to eat or drink. That okay?" Both of the men nod their heads in appreciation.

We all walk into the house, heading straight to the room where Carl lies. The two men follow me and Maggie through the doorway, I stand back in the door frame as the two men walk straight in. Maggie stays behind, standing right next to me, which is when I turn my head to look at her.

"Who are they?" I ask, Maggie looks away from them and looks at me replying quickly, "Apart from the group Rick and Lori were with, more are comin'." Maggie gives me one last glance before walking to where Patricia sat.

I look around the room, I see Hershel checking Carl's pressure, Lori and Rick sitting in chairs right next to each other, and Patricia sitting in a chair at the foot of the bed, a sad look on her face which I can only guess is from Otis being gone for so long.

The shy man takes off his baseball cap before breaking the silence, "Hey." He quietly said, Rick looked up at him nodding his head before saying "Hey" as well.

"Um, we're here, Okay?" The shy Asian man says quietly, Rick looks away, bringing his hand to his head. Lori looks over at him before replying, "Thank you."

"Whatever you need." The bandaged man said. I glance over at Rick, his eyes already on me, we both look at each other— it seems as if nothing else is around us every time I look at him. I avert my eyes, looking over at the two men and motioning them to follow me, Maggie automatically walking with us.

God. I need to stop staring at him.

—

WORD COUNT: 2600+

hiii, one more chapter for 2x03 i swear, it was originally over 5000 words but I decided to cut the chapters into 2 parts.

sorry if there's any mistakes!

i start school in 5 hours 👎🏻

anyway please leave any questions or advice you have , or just comment for fun

tpwk

L