Chapter- Eighty

Wonwoo was calmly watching your face while rubbing it with his thumb. He asked a question but you didn't know what to answer. Nah exactly it's not like you don't miss him. But how to say it? You were not sure though.

'W-wonu!'

'What?'

'Let's go downstairs. Have some breakfast.'

'Surely I will.'

He told roaming his hand through your bare arm.

'L-let's go!?'

You asked as he didn't show any sign of going down.

'But you didn't tell me yet. Are you shy?'

'S-Sometimes, I t-think-  I want you to be there, when you are not a-around.'

You said looking at wonwoo, confusingly.

'When you want me to be around you?'

'T-then what will you do? You will come by that time?'

You didn't know what was the reason of your growing feeling for him. You think it's just you wanted to live again through him, with him. You believe he is the only one you have, and so it maybe is happening.

'Maybe? I'll try to be present there.'

'I-I want you to stay beside me everytime. Even when I'm bathing.'

Wonwoo chuckled at your answer.

'I knew you miss me that's why you call me and text me a lot. But I didn't know you miss me this much.'

You felt very very awkward after you got exposed. No it's not very obvious that you miss him too too much, but it's kind of- ugh now he knows! Nah he is very intelligent that it's nothing for him to know.

'It's okay, I think you Don't need me while you take a bath. But yeah if anywhere else I'll try come to you immediately.'

Wonwoo told chuckling that you hnow he was lying. It's not actually possible to give you that much time.

'No problem. I'll wait till your album's promotion is done.'

Wonwoo held your face like a cat and brushed his nose with yours. It reopened a core memory. This is the same way mingyu used to brush his nose with yours. You Don't know how he knew. But since wonwoo used to stalk you to actually protect you, he saw you many times with mingyu like that, while puffing cigarettes and seeing happy mingyu and you. He burnt inside but never thought one day he could do the same, being happy with you.

_________________________________________

You couldn't stop crying while taking shower in bathtub. Suddenly you realized wonwoo came from work. You heard him talking in phone in the bed room.

After seeing his garden you first thought you didn't deserve to be wonwoo's love life. So you didn't had the gut to call him and tell him everything that was in your mind. Now hearing his voice that heard faint from bathroom, you felt like you would run to him right now.

You spread your hand to get the phone that was in the cabinet.

You called wonwoo and waited for him to pick it up. You heard him telling the other person that he would call them back soon. Then he picked up your call. He was confused since he was pretty sure that you came back from the studio before afternoon. He got some hours left for something.

'Hello y/n?'

Wonwoo asked through the phone. He got worried Suddenly.

'Where are you?'

'W-wonu!'

You could barely talk due to hiccups of crying. Wonwoo got more tensed hearing crying voice of yours.

'Y/n where are you? Why are you crying? Are you okay? I knew you came home earlier.'

'W-wonu I'm in the bathroom.'

Wonwoo heard sound from the bathroom and followed the door.

'You are in the bathroom? What happened?'

Wonwoo was very confused.

'Can y-you come here? I n-need to see you wonu!'

'What? You want to me enter into the bathroom? You are taking shower?'

'Please wonu!'

You told crying and pleading. You were so hell bent to see wonwoo.

'Hm!'

Wonwoo said opening the door and looking through it.

'Come here wonu.'

He saw your little white bath tub in the middle of the large bathroom.

You were looking smaller in the tub. Only part of your hair and face was showing. It looked like you were naked as your upper chest was showing.

Wonwoo hesitated to come to the tub. He felt bad seeing your red face. Why were you crying? Did anything happen? But wonwoo didn't ask you anything.

When he got closer he hid a long breath of assurance since you were not naked and had some towels on. He saw you crying profusingly.

'W-wonu!'

You held his hand with your wet hands.

'Are you okay? Why are you crying?'

Wonwoo asked feeling bad. He had no idea since you got a lot better from before.

'You are asking in very wrong way. Why Don't you put your hands on my face and ask that?'

You told him while crying so he didn't understand fully.

'What? I put my hands on your face? Right now?'

You nodded.

'Yes. You always ask me like that, but why not now?'

Wonwoo didn't as the situation was not it. He calmly went closer and sat beside the tub side.

'Like this?'

Wonwoo put his hand below your jawline, partly touching your soft neck.

You nodded.

'Can i know now what's the reason? Who hurt my y/n!'

'Why didn't you tell me the grass you grew are of dandelion's?'

You asked being so overwhelmed in emotion. You didn't notice until you saw the white dandelions today in the yard. You didn't know the yellow flowers of those grass are actually dandelions. You always knew dandelions are always white. You felt goosebumps and roller coaster of emotion after looking at the dandelions, seeing from the balcony after coming from work. It's it the backyard so usually you don't see them always.

From when you saw that you didn't know when you started crying. When you were going to shower, when you saw your reflection you noticed your red puffy face. Exactly when you started crying you couldn't remember. All you know that you kept sitting on the floor of the balcony holding the railing. You felt guilty for not appreciating wonwoo's love for you. Also you remembered the times when wonwoo was extremely flexible to you, in the times of practice, from the very beginning. You know now how much he used to love you, you regretted for not knowing it earlier. All you did was sinking in the delusional ocean of Mingyu's love. You were happy, confused and at the end it almost ended your life. Again wonwoo spread his arm for you, when you thought there's no meaning of living. Wonwoo gave you time to heal, enough space so you could deal with your trauma little by little. He made you lessened your fear, he gave you a new life. Where you maybe is not euphoric like when you were with mingyu, but this life is calm, all you wanted to live. Life is not only being delusional and euphoric.

You put wonwoo's hand on your chest, putting your face on his palm, you adored his pretty hand.

'Don't you like dandelions? I thought you will like them.'

He told so normally not knowing why you were sad.

'You didn't tell me. I love them so much.'

You told sobbing. Wonwoo was very confused about your crying.

'Did anything happen y/n? Anything wrong?'

Wonwoo asked being concerned looking at your body. He always gets very tensed about you when you are alone, or working with somebody else in the studio.

'I'm ok.'

'Then why are you crying?'

Wonwoo asked wiping your tears, putting your hair from forehead, exposing your pretty face. He looked at it for sometime and said

'It Hurts me so much when I see you are sad. And when you cry it feels like the whole world is crushing. Do you know how I feel? It feels so miserable. I see you crying but can't do anything.'

He said looking at your face, you were looking so beautiful as there was water on your baby pink skin. Wonwoo never knew you look this pretty in shower. You recently dyed your hair black and all those were falling covering your body. Still some parts are showing from the gap of hair strands. Wonwoo exposed the hair from your arm and held your wet arm softly.

'Don't cry y/n. Tell me what's wrong, we will try to solve it together.'

'Wonu!'

Your body was wet but you didn't hesitate to jump to wonwoo to hug him tightly. You made his body wet by hugging with your upper body. His neck got wet for your wet hands on it. You felt his face was touching yours while touching. You hugged him more tightly pressing him hardly.

Wonwoo felt more miserable getting wet from you. But whatever he wrapped his hands around you to cool you down.

'Wonu! Why do you love me so much? And how come I didn't notice it earlier?'

'Aww it's okay. Now you know. I'm so glad.'

'Weren't you sad when I didn't notice you? It didn't make you feel bad that I don't love you back?'

You asked.

'Why? I know you love me.'

Wonwoo was saying these putting his hand on your shoulder, tapping it lightly.

'How?'

You removed the hug to see him.

'You don't love me?'

He asked.

'I don't know. I'm not sure. But how do you know?'

'Love is felt y/n! I can feel your love around me.'

Wonwoo was wrapping his hand around your waist as your were holding him. He added

'Look I never treat you nice like mingyu. Like he used to make you food, he took care of you so much. But I do not. Still you are saying I love you.'

'But-'

'I can feel your love exactly the way you can feel mine.'

Realising you got exposed that you love him too, and he knows that, you got red.

'W-Wonu!'

'Are you embarrassed?'

You kept looking down not answering.

'Haha cute. See I'm totally wet. I'll go change okay?'

He said and went away from the bathroom.

_________________________________________

'What should I wish?'

You asked wonwoo standing in the yard, in front of dandelions.

'Umm- a baby?'

'What?'

You were confused.

'You should wish for a baby I guess.'

Wonwoo said.

'Baby? Where do I get a baby? Where would it come from? And why?'

You asked confusingly. Wonwoo thought for a while looking at you that if you were this dumb from before or you got the dumbness from mingyu.

'I am sorry. I was just joking.'

You looked at wonwoo not knowing why he was talking about baby out of nowhere. What will you do with a baby?

'What will I do with a baby?'

You asked.

'Nothing. But I think you can pass time with it?'

'Why?'

Wonwoo waited for a while and came closer to you.

'I told about our baby. Like you are the mom and I'm the dad. A very special one who will be made from you and me.'

You looked at wonwoo for sometime thinking you are so dumb. How come it didn't appear in your mind.

You couldn't talk for a while being red on the spot. There's no way wonwoo is talking about a baby, while he only kissed you once. You kept standing there dumbfounded thinking one day you must be a mom. Like really it will happen one day with wonwoo, if you really want a child. While you flinch if wonwoo put his hand on your stomach while sleeping. Like how will it happen!??

You got very shy that couldn't say a thing.

'I was joking y/n. You will wish whatever you want.'

He told picking a dandelion for you. But you still were processing what he said.

'But- but y-you want to be a d-dad. Right?'

You asked getting red.

'Surely I want to. But why are you stressing out now? I said I was joking.'

'O-one day i-it will happen right?'

'What?'

'Like the babies.. if you want to be a dad. W-we will have to m-make babies?'

Wonwoo smiled hearing from you.

'I think so.'

'B-but how? I'm not ready.'

Wonwoo laughed a little and said

'We will see one day. When have time, okay?'

'But s-sometimes I want to be a mom too. Like right now if I had my baby, she would also be with us right? Playing here.'

You got emotional saying so.

'She? You want a baby girl?'

He asked.

You nodded.

'Yes. I'll love her so much.'

Wonwoo put your hair behind your ear adoring your face gently.

'Do you feel so lonely?'

'Kind of. What baby you want wonu?'

'What baby? What do you mean?'

'Like a baby boy a baby girl?'

'I will like to have just babies.'

'No we will have a girl wonu. She will be very pretty as you.'

You said.

'I think she is going to be as pretty as you. I guess prettier than you.'

'No I wish she will be like you... b-but I'm not ready wonu.'

You told worriedly.

'Okay y/n! We will see when it's time. You are yourself a baby.'

'When?'

'It's upto you.'

You were totally red in this conversation. You can't imagine physical relationship.

'We will see it later OK? Also carats don't know about our marriage yet. You are still very young to have a baby.'

Wonwoo said rubbing your face with his thumb.

'And I think it's the best time for you to produce music. You are doing it really good. So let's take some time to make music first. After that you will also be mature to be a mom.'

'You are saying we have a lot of time to make babies.'

'Exactly! So Don't stress out about how it happens.'

'Oh my God I'm so shy even thinking about that.'

You told.

Wonwoo laughed out loud.

'Really! Don't be shy y/nah! You will have to get over it. I can't wait any longer to be that close to you.'

'W-what?'

You asked with eyes enlarged. Wonwoo wants to do it with you?

'Haha I was joking.'

He said chuckling. He was not joking. You stayed like that red apple for sometime and looked at the dandelions.

'I should thank it first. Right?'

'Why?'

Wonwoo asked.

'I always wished that I get the love back that I give. I thought it would be from the same person who i loved. So I was very disappointed about dandelions that my wish was not fulfilled. But see, I get my love back from you million times bigger than I gave mingyu.'

'I'm glad.'

'I love you so much wonu!'

You told without blinking, looking at wonwoo. It was so sudden.

'Not that much like you do. But I love you more than anyone I love.'

'I didn't say though that you have to love me more. But it made me happy.'

'You don't believe me? I really love you a lot, I think.'

You told putting your hand on his arm.

'Surely I do.'

You went closer to wonwoo for a hug.

'What happened?'

'I think I got emotional. You are so pure. I don't deserve you.'

'Who said this? You are the best.'

Wonwoo told pecking on your forehead.

'I should blow it. But I Don't have anything to wish wonu. I got everything I wanted.'

'Then? What will you do with it?'

You wished something for you wonwoo and seventeen. You want everyone to be happier and healthier.

'I just did something simple.'

_________________________________________

You always thought life is not like nivels that you read. Life doesn't get happy ending. But you were wrong. Life must have some ups and downs and that nay sometimes hit hard. You still think about the times when you and mingyu broke up. It was so tragic. And sometimes you wonder, it was also very hard for mingyu too. You used to think that mingyu cheated on you. But now you realize that life sometimes take people to some edge where they have nothing else to do. Like that mingyu also had to choose between you and someone else, he chose her because he knew tzuyu had no one else except him. You were very huffy thinking about you, that you also got nobody else, then why mingyu couldn't stay with you. But now you know. Mingyu knew very well that there was someone who can love you more than him.

It must be was very hard for him to do all these in an arranged manner. You think yourself sometimes. Mingyu did never want to hurt you willingly. All your misunderstanding went away little by little. You can see everything clearly now. Love doesn't always make people blind. It most of the time helps people to see the real world. Wonwoo's love made you do the same. Now you have no confusion. You can feel you are so mature, who doesn't feel sad for little things.

It sometimes makes you wonder how is Mingyu. Yeah you see him almost everyday, but Don't get close to him. He helps you with many things still it seems hard to talk to him normally. Mingyu easily talks to you like all the things didn't happen.

You also try to talk to him like he does, but can not. You know you are healing. But the scars are all here. You Don't know how to remove it. And also you stopped thinking that it was Mingyu's fault for the scars in your heart. Now you know those scars are also a part of your life. Some scars are pretty and colorful, some are dark, still you just can't ignore them. They are your past, with what you want to continue your life.

To be continued...Vote and comment Words count: 3019