21

Chapter twenty one: Heartbreak

The whole day felt like it was a blur; Evan was point blank avoiding me and all I had to concentrate on was my heavy heart and the shit scribbled on the chalk board.

"Is everything okay?" Henry asked as he eyed me comfortingly "you don't seem yourself ?"

I weakly nodded "I'm fine, thank you"

Swallowing saliva I began to write the notes down in my notebook; today was hellish and I would of much preferred to have pretended to be poorly than put up with this crap.

"That's all for today class, remember your exam is tomorrow so get some beauty sleep!" The teacher exclaimed with a smile "I know you have it in you to get those amazing grades"

Rolling my eyes I sat up from my desk and quickly hurried off out, leaving Henry trailing behind me like a lost puppy.

Just as I was about to turn a corner I bumped into Katie which sent me backwards onto the floor "fuck" I hissed, rubbing my temples.

Katie scrunched up her face as if I was the most disgusting thing she had ever laid eyes upon; she probably wasn't wrong. "Can you least mind where you're going? Freak"

I wasn't prepared to deal with her today so I simply stood up and continued walking which Henry at this point was panting from trying to keep up.

"Maeve! Wait up" he called again but I blocked him out; I didn't want to speak nor see anyone today which is quite impossible at school but there we go.

I made my way outside where the wind hit my skin like a thousand needles; my hair whipping past me. Everyone was grouped up as usual in their little corners but my heart felt sour as I saw Evan and a girl look all too cosy for my liking.

"Finally. who are you, Usain Bolt ? Fuck me" Henry growled as he breathlessly threw his head forwards.

I kept on watching; what was Evan doing ?

Henry caught on and instantly stiffened beside me "should we go grab some lunch? I'm absolutely starving" Henry cut in to try and distract me but it wasn't working.

That's when the whole world crashed around me.. Evan pulled the girl in and their lips were locked in a hungry, passionate kiss. The same lips that were attached to mine a mere night ago. How could he do this to me?

Tears pricked at my eyes and I instantly shook my head "no.. no no" I sobbed to myself "why me ? Why does everything bad happen to me" I continued to cry as I cupped my face with my hands.

Henry wrapped a secure arm around my waist and pulled me in "it's okay, he doesn't deserve you. Do you hear me?"

I shook my head into his chest; dampening his t shirt "why has he done this to me? Am I really that fucking awful and gross?"

Henry stroked my hair with his hands and shushed me into his chest to try comfort me but I must admit my heart wasn't going to stop hurting for a very long time. "You're not awful or gross. You're beautiful and amazing. Truly the most amazing person I've ever met"

I had never felt love before and now I understand when people say that love hurts. It really fucking hurts the soul.

"Let's go, I don't want to be here anymore" I stated shakily to Henry who looked like a bull who had seen red, he was angry. Very angry.

"Don't do anything" I pleaded as I grabbed his upper arms "you're too good for that. You know you are"

Henry clenched his jaw and nodded "fine but he is fucking dead to me"

Turning away we escaped school and got into my car. My breathing was heavy and my mind was swirling with dark thoughts that I had so desperately pushed behind me.

"I-I think I'm having a panic attack" I admitted as my breathing kept on growing heavy with it hitching in my throat. My hands were shaking and my eyes were streaming with never ending pools of tears.

"Maeve listen to me right now"

"You're going to be okay. I promise you. I'll look after you with everything I have"

"Evan is just an asshole with no morals. You're so much better than him" Henry rambled on with concern written over his face.

He rubbed circles on my back whilst my head rested against the steering wheel "I never want to see him again!" I screamed in anger "I HATE him. I fucking do, I fucking hate him"

Henry picked up a wet strand of my hair that was stuck to my cheek and put it behind my ear "you have every right to hate him. But for now you need to try calm down please. For me ?"

More minutes passed before I finally began to calm down, though I looked an absolute state with mascara down my face and chapped lips. Henry must think I belonged in the loony bin. "There we go"

Grabbing a smoke from my packet of cigarettes I eagerly lit it and rested my head into the headrest "fuck you Evan peters"

**

Henry and I spent most of the day together; the sky was now dark and the stars shon down on us. It felt peaceful.

"Thank you so much for tonight. You really have helped me" I said with a smile "I cannot wait for our Scotland trip. I'll book my ticket tonight"

Henry nodded with a massive grin "I absolutely cannot wait. Believe me when I tell you it's going to be fucking brilliant. We might even see Nessie"

Scoffing I gave him a hearty smirk "You're great. Truly. Thank you again"

Henry rolled his eyes "stop thanking me. I would do it again and again in a heartbeat. I hope you know that"

I gave Henry a big hug as I dropped him off at his house; I don't know why I got so lucky to have such an amazing friend but I wasn't complaining.

Sighing I drove 'home' where I would see Evan which I was absolutely dreading with every inch of me. I didn't want to appear as weak and fragile so I decided on not even saying a word.

"Sissy! You've been ages" Dylan cried as he wrapped his arms around me

Kissing his head I pouted "I'm sorry Dyl. I'll get you ice cream tomorrow. How about that?"

He nodded enthusiastically "it's a deal.. but I want extra sprinkles"

I chuckled "sure thing Dylan. Whatever you want"

Julie walked in as Dylan went to his room and she looked concerned; the sort of concern that I couldn't configure if it was anger or not.

"Where have you been?"

"Sorry, I was out with Henry. Just needed to clear my head" I admitted truthfully "it won't happen again"

"You don't need to apologise sweetie. You're not a prisoner. You just need to let me know in future"

"Thank you Julie" I said with a curt smile "I'm going to get some sleep but I'm sorry again"

Walking up the stairs I was filled with anticipation.

would Evan even bother trying to speak to me?

Did he even care about what he did?

Would he try and play it off ?

Scrambling from my thoughts I undressed and got into bed; hoping that tomorrow will be a better day and I wouldn't have to worry about my anxiety fuelled brain.