Chapter 16 - Tough Love

Mon looked impossibly hot it hurts to look at her.

I had to pretend to clear my throat just so I could put my hand on my chest to calm me down.

Stunning in a pink satin camisole top that revealed soft pale skin, dark jeans and low cut boots, my brain short circuited for a bit before I realized that Nita, Yuki and all my friends were looking at me.

"Are you alright, Sam?" Nita's eyebrow was knitted in a bemused expression.

"I'm fine," I smiled big and wide.

My eyes instantly travelled to her hand that was on Mon's back.

The pulse roared in my ears as I reined in the rocketing emotions I felt when I saw them together.

Nita's cheeks were flushed and so was Mon's.

They were all smiles baring perfect white teeth that shone so bright.

It irritated me to see that they looked so cozy with each other.

But when her eyes met mine, the simmering shade of anger was back.

It hurts my heart even more.

I didn't even want to come here tonight.

But Kate was back weeks after filming on location.

She wanted to see us and basically demanded that I come with them or else.

I have no idea what the or else part was.

Jim and Tee also wanted to go out and have a good time so I met them at this club.

Lately I felt as if I was not playing my cards right.

When Mon left the office, livid at what I wrote for the magazine, I literally hit my head against the wall.

I should have restrained myself from telling her the truth.

What was I aiming for anyway?

Did I really think she would be over the moon to hear that I was still in love with her knowing that I was still very much unavailable?

My impetuous behavior was making things more and more difficult for both of us.

Nita's presence added to the complications.

Now that they're both here tonight, should I confirm my suspicion that Nita was after Mon?

I mean that irritating smile on her lips never wavered.

"Do you all know each other?" Nita pointed to my friends.

We all said yes at the same time.

Her gaze flitted to Mon and Yuki who were talking in whispers.

Nita didn't say anything but I saw in here eyes that she was trying to put two and two together.

"Are you guys staying?" Tee asked Nita.

"Yes, we are." She said, resolute.

"The night is just getting started," She smiled at Mon who basked in the glow of that smile.

I gritted my teeth harder.

"We're gonna go get a table. You can join us if you want." Tee offered.

Jim glared at her but Tee missed it.

"It's okay," Nita spoke.

"I'm going to the washroom to freshen up."

"Me too," Mon said.

"I'll wait with them," Yuki moved closer to Tee.

"Okay. I'll come find you later." Mon turned to my friends.

She smiled at them but avoided my gaze.

They walked side by side towards the narrow hallway.

I was seething by the time they left.

Tee and Yuki stayed behind to get drinks.

"What's wrong with you?" Kate asked as soon as we took our seats on the booth closest to the dance floor.

There were so many people standing and laughing that my annoyance and regret were at equal levels of intensity.

"I shouldn't have come here," I scowled.

"Why? Don't you want to see me?" Kate looked offended.

"It's not that." I refrained from giving a straight answer.

On the phone, she sounded like she really missed us.

Maybe she was acting?

I don't know.

They were filming in a remote place and the cell connection was so bad that she compared it to staying in the jungle.

Jim reminded her that's exactly where she was.

"Is it because of Mon and Nita?" Jim asked.

"No." I huffed.

"It's definitely a yes then," Kate countered.

"Why would you think that?"

"Because you look like you were ready to rip off the smile on Nita's face when you saw them tonight." Jim answered.

"Why are they together anyway?" Kate surveyed the dance floor.

We followed her gaze.

Mon and Nita were back there.

It was aggravating to see them dancing so close.

The DJ wasn't even playing a slow song and yet they were hip to hip.

I looked away, fighting back tears brought on by fury.

But when I blinked, Jim saw it and her expression softened to one of concern.

"Sam, are you crying?" Her arm went up my shoulder.

"No," I sniffled then quickly wipe the tears away.

"I have a headache."

"Come on. We just got here," Kate pleaded.

"You can all stay. I'm gonna head out," I stood up but Jim pulled me back down on the seat.

"You're not leaving until you tell us what's going on." She tightened her grip on my shoulder.

We didn't get to continue the conversation because Tee and Yuki came back with drinks.

His face dropped when he saw our forlorn expressions.

"Did something happen while we were away?" He looked at Yuki who was holding two glasses of blue cocktails.

"Sam is not feeling well," Jim answered.

"What happened?" His expression turned to concern.

"I have a headache."

"Do you want to go?"

"Yes. You can stay. I can drive myself home."

"No, you're not," Tee set the drinks down on the table.

"I'll drive you. Kate can take my car.""No," Jim protested.

"Why don't you both stay here and I will drive Sam home? I'm a little tired anyway. Too pregnant to party," She patted her belly that hasn't even started showing yet.

"Are you sure?" Tee asked.

"Yes. Kate looked like she badly needs a drink."

"Will you fit in Sam's car?" Our friend shot back.

"The seats are adjustable, dummy. Besides, if I don't say anything, no one will know I'm having a baby," She glared at Kate.

"If that's what you want then I'll see you off," Tee said goodbye to Kate and Yuki and warned them not to finish the drinks until he gets back.

Jim had a slight difficulty getting in because the seats were low.

I felt bad to see how uncomfortable she was but I have a splitting headache now and couldn't even keep my eyes open.

I searched my purse for my pills but I switched bags for this night out so I was even more frustrated that I didn't have it.

"Why don't you sleep? I'll wake you up when we get to your place." Jim suggested.

My sleep was uneasy.

When Jim woke me up, the throbbing in my head worsened.

I walked slowly to match her pace.

Once we got in, I lay on the couch while Jim searched the bathroom for my medication.

I've never invited them here before so it took a while for her to find what she was looking for.

She came back with a glass of water and sat by my feet.

"I know you have a headache but tell me what's going on," She took the glass from me and put it on the coffee table.

"Nothing's going on, Jim. I just have a headache."

"Bullshit. You think you can hide from me?"

I opened one eye and saw her knitted brows.

"Why don't you believe me?"

"Because you're smiling more than usual tonight. It's scary."

"I'm just stressed about work."

"Since when are you not stressed about work? When you had Diversity, you were already stressed. You would think that with selling the company to Nita, you would be more relaxed." She scolded me.

I closed my eyes hoping she would get the hint and stop talking.

Jim shook my leg.

"It's just the two of us now so spill."

"I have nothing to say."

"Then you have something to say." I opened my eyes again and propped my elbows to sit up.

Jim leaned on the couch to make herself comfortable.

"I did something bad."

"What? Did you poison your grandmother?"

I almost choke when I heard that.

"Don't even joke about something like that," I admonished.

"Okay. Sorry. That was bad. But what did you do? Did you break the engagement with Kirk?" Her eyes grew wide.

"No. Worse."

"Sam, are you going to keep me guessing the whole night or are you going to tell me?"

I inhaled and drag my breath out slowly.

"I told Mon I'm still in love with her."

"What the hell?" She yelled.

"Why did you do that? Didn't we talk about this before?"

"I know, I know." It felt so embarrassing to admit it but since that day she walked out on me, I have been restless.

I couldn't sleep at night.

I couldn't even eat.

Waking up was harder because I dreaded going to the office.

Mon won't even look at me.

I have been getting frequent bouts of migraine lately.

During the launch party for Vivre that coincided with the publication of the first article, Mon and I were sandwiched with Nita.

When the photographer asked that we stand beside each other since we were really the highlight of the event, I was the one who move a little closer just so no one would notice the tension between us.

I smiled so hard my jaws hurt.

She had a big smile too but when I saw the pictures and zoomed in, the sadness in her eyes was very visible.

"Is that why she was with Nita tonight?"

"I don't know."

"They seem pretty close. That must be what triggered the headache."

"I'm clueless as you are."

"Sam," Jim placed a hand on my shin.

"You're in pain right now. I could see that you couldn't even open your eyes.""Where's the but in that statement?"

"It's coming," She took a deep breath first and then looked me straight in the eyes.

"Set her free."

"But I can't. You saw me tonight. I cried. I don't even do that."

"I know. But the more you hold on to Mon, the more you will scare her away. You should let things take its course or else you will lose her forever. Is that what you want?"

"No, but what if somebody swoop in and take her away? Or what if someone already had?"

The thought of that happening made it harder to breathe.

Nita's smiling face flashed in my memory.

My head throbbed wildly.

"I bet you a million dollars that if you didn't have all these...," She paused as if searching for the right words to say, "complications, it wouldn't be this hard. Maybe she will even take you back with open arms. But you have your grandmother and Kirk. She's smart not to let herself fall into this love thing again. I mean think back to what you did in high school. You were both hiding and going to all these far places just so you go on dates in peace," Jim's expression softened.

"Love shouldn't be like that, Sam. You should both be free. Otherwise, you're just asking for disaster."

I lay back down again.

"I'm sorry I have to say it. But I care for you and Mon. If this is what it takes to save your hearts then I'd gladly be the villain."