Chapter 13 - Revelations

The next time I saw my friends, Jim was bemoaning the fact that not only does she look like a whale but she felt like one too.

"We're you a whale in your past life?" Kate teased.

I spilled the champagne I was drinking prompting all of them to turn their heads and look at me.

"That's a first," Jim blurted.

"You don't normally lose your composure no matter how rowdy we got."

"Are you okay, Sam?" Tee asked, puzzled.

"I'm fine," I dabbed my chin with the napkin.

"There's something different with you," Jim pointed at my face.

"What do you mean?"

"You don't look tense. On the contrary, you seem happy. What's wrong with you? Are you sick?" She leaned forward to touch my forehead but I swatted her hand away.

"Yeah, Sam. The last time we saw each other, you were ready to throw in the towel. What changed?" Kate agreed.

"Nothing," I kept drinking.

"There's definitely something," They chorused.

"I'm alright. Don't overthink it. We should order. The waiter has been looking at us."

"Is it Mon?" Jim ignored my remark and voiced out what they were all thinking.

"Why does it always have to be her?" I feigned ignorance.

"Because she was the only one who can make you look like this," Jim outlined the shape of a smiley face in the air.

"That's not true," I protested.

"It is true," They chimed in.

I shot them all a deadly glare hoping to put an end to this nonsense.

"Clue us in will you?" Tee pleaded.

I scanned their expectant faces and debated whether to tell them about the truce between Mon and I.

They were my best friends.

It was a no-brainer really.

My grandmother may not approve of them but they were with me through thick and thin.

"Alright then," I conceded.

"Mon agreed to let me work on getting her forgiveness."

"What?" They all have the same puzzled expressions.

"She and I are going to write the first issue of Vivre under the Diversity banner for Nita's company.

"What does this have to do with Mon forgiving you?" Jim asked.

"We are going to share our own story.""You?" Kate pointed at me.

"Samanun Anuntrakul? The living embodiment of a steel trap?"

I grabbed the champagne flute and pretended to throw the drink at her.

Kate covered her face with both hands.

"How are you going to do that?" Tee asked.

"Anonymously of course," I replied in a calm manner.

"That's like the obvious choice," Jim shot back.

"You would not be caught opening up to random people. That would go against the grain and how you were raised by your grandmother." "That's why we have to come up with an alias."

"An alias? How exciting," Kate's sarcasm was not lost on me.

I glared at her.

"Wow. You're really going all out to fix things with Mon," Tee looked pleased.

"But why?" Kate was still not convinced.

"Since we will be working together, I wanted us to be comfortable with each other. That's all."

"Is that the real reason?" Jim was suspicious.

"What else is there?" I felt annoyed with how abrasive she was since she sat down for our weekly get-together.

She always blamed her pregnancy for the never ending mood swings but tonight, I don't think she can use that as an excuse for how bad she was treating me.

"When you broke up, you never made an effort to contact Mon," She reminded me.

"You know the reason why. If I did that, Grandmother would find out. I don't want Mon or her family to get in trouble," I reasoned.

"Do you want her and her family to be in trouble now?" Jim countered.

"Your grandmother is still alive. Her views about same-sex relationships haven't change," She sipped the orange juice.

"Of course I don't want them to get in trouble."

"So what's the difference if you ask for her forgiveness then compared to now?" Jim asked as soon as she replaced the glass on the table.

They all stared at me.

"I think I can handle myself better now."

"Are you sure about that?" Jim was relentless.

I didn't even got the chance to defend myself because she kept talking.

"What if the same thing happens? Will you stand up for what you want this time? What if Kirk finds out about your shenanigans and ratted you out to your grandmother like he did the last time?"

"Mon and I are just working together. It's not like I'm going to fall in love with her again."

"What if it does happen? When it comes to Mon, you forget yourself." She was not giving up on this.

This was starting to feel like an attack.

"Why are you overthinking it? Can't you just be happy that I finally get to work on the one thing I've been wishing for?"

"Because I don't want you to hurt Mon again. When you broke up with her, the girl was devastated. I saw her in school and we talked about what happened. She cried so hard, Sam. It broke my heart." There was a glint of pain in her eyes.

It worried me.

But could it be the pregnancy hormones on overdrive?

"Why are you only telling me this now?"

"Because she made me promise," She looked around the table.

I could tell that there was more to this than she was letting on.

Even Kate and Tee looked curious.

"Say it, Jim." I said.

"There was one other thing she told me that day," She exhaled.

"What was it?"

"She said that if you would just talk to her, she would forgive you for what happened. But you ghosted her so there's that."

"Are you kidding me right now?"

"Why would I joke about it?"

All of a sudden, the sparkle from the champagne and the happiness I felt about Mon agreeing to what I wanted, vanished.

I was perplexed with what I heard.

For years, I thought of the things I could have done to set things right.

The pain of the memory faded but there was always that part of me that remained unsettled by how things turned out between us.

Now Jim was sharing things she kept for years.

It made me feel guiltier to know that my friend also carried the burden of what happened.

"Just make sure that whatever it is your planning, you don't break her heart again. She doesn't deserve to go through pain the second time around. Mon was one-of-a-kind. She deserved to be loved and not taken for granted."

Kate and Tee nodded.

When my friends learned that Mon and I were dating, they were over the moon and intrigued.

They sought her out in school and basically cornered her to ask if she was serious about me.

Jim locked me in the bathroom so they could talk to her in peace.

I had to yank the door open to be able to escape.

Mon won them over with her innate kindness and warmth.

They even told her stuff about me -- things that they only knew including the fact about my grandmother.

Jim warned her to be strong.

"The highlight of your relationship will be the day grandmother finds out that you're dating." She warned.

With Jim revelation, I lost my appetite.

I excused myself to go home.

"We haven't ordered yet," Kate placed a hand on my arm to stop me from leaving.

"I'm not hungry anymore," I took my purse and walked out.

My phone pinged nonstop on the way home.

Kate and Tee sent countless messages to ask if I was okay.

I ignored it since I was driving.

Even when I got home, I chose not to answer.

Jim's disclosure threw me off.

She never told me that she spoke with Mon after we broke up.

Jim made a promise and that was the surprising part.

She was second to Kate when it came to keeping promises.

If was like asking a thief not to steal.

I went to work the next day with a splitting headache and dark circles under my eyes that even my concealer couldn't hide.

Mon and I set up a meeting that afternoon to finalize the first story.

I wanted to cancel because I didn't have the mental bandwidth but we don't have a lot of time left to prepare the first issue.

Nita called that morning to follow up on it.

She was not going to the office due to meetings.

I told her she would have the final draft that evening.

Mon gave me homework to think of an alias and laughed when I told her what it was going to be.

"Chamcham?" Her lips curled into a smile.

It was so good to see her smiling again rather than always fighting with me about almost everything.

"What about you?"

"Since you will be Chamcham, I will be M2."

"M2? You sound like a secret agent."

"I would have wanted Monmon but that will be too obvious. It defeats the purpose of being incognito."

There was a tingling in my scalp.

Her voice sounded so far away.

I was trying really hard to concentrate but failing fast.

The light in the office seemed to be dancing.

I squinted.

"Are you okay, Sam?"

"No," I put my head down on the desk.

My heart was racing and the walls were closing in.

The headache had turned into a full-blown migraine and everything seemed bright and loud.

Even the perfume that Mon wore, the one I liked on her skin, seemed overpowering.

I heard her chair squeaked when she stood.

Mon came around and I felt her soft hands on my shoulder, the warmth seeping into the light material of my black sleeveless top.

"You're cold," I heard the concern in her voice.

"Why don't you lie down for a bit?" She helped me get up and guided me to the couch that was in the corner of the office.

She placed a throw pillow on the armrest and I lay down on it.

"You still get those pesky migraines?" Her voice was soothing.

"I do."

"Do you have your meds?"

A soft laugh came out of me.

She still remembered these things.

"It's in my purse."She stood up and I heard the click of the magnetic button when she opened my bag.

The sound of water being poured on a glass and Mon's quiet footfalls told me that she was coming back.

"Here," She opened my hand and placed the small white pill.

I strained to get up but had no other choice.

Mon was ready with the water.

I popped the pill in my mouth and only took a sip before plopping down on the couch again.

"How are you going home? You can't drive in this condition."

"Can you drive me?"

"Even if I know how to, I'd be so nervous to drive your car."

"You know how to drive then?"

She didn't answer.

I thought she left but when I opened one eye, she was staring at me.

"Mon, the answer is a simple yes or no." I closed my eyes again.

Even talking was an ordeal right now but I want to know the answer.

"Yes."

"Take Miss Duanpen then."

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why?"

"What if I scratch it? Or worse, what if we crash and die on the way to your house."

"I'll have it fixed if it's get scratched. If we crash and die, then that's it for us."

She pouted at how nonchalant I was about something as serious as dying.

"But I've never driven something like that in a long time."

"Which means you had driven one before?"

Silence again.

Nop was the one who was into sports cars.

I remembered when I drove a red Mustang to school.

His eyes literally popped out when I pulled up at the parking lot.

My head was throbbing and it was a good idea not to quiz Mon about what she just said but my mind won't give it a rest.

I have to know if she test drive a sports car with Nop.

"Who's car did you drive?"

"Huh?"

"You said you've driven a sports car before?"

"Ah. Miss Nita's Ferrari."

I do not like this new information.

My head throbbed even faster.

It was like having a brain freeze after you drank a Slurpee too fast.

"Why did she do that?" This curiosity will be the death of me.

"She advised me to take driving lessons and to eventually get a car when I can afford it."

"Why?"

Mon frowned but answered the question."For work you know? At first I didn't like the idea. I saw how people drive. It was scary. But she made some good points."

"Did she teach you how to drive too?"

She glared.

"I enrolled in a driving school. After that, Miss Nita took me to this car show and to celebrate finishing the classes, she told me to take her car for a spin."

"You drove Nita's car but you won't take Miss Duanpen?"

I couldn't control the sharp exhale that came out.

Mon sensed my annoyance.

The tightness in my scalp got worse.

"Sam, Miss Nita was with me the whole time. Meanwhile you," She poked my arm, "have a migraine."

"Whatever."

"I'm going to call a cab and drop you off."

"I don't want to leave Duanpen in the parking lot the whole night."

"Sam, please? It would give me peace of mind if we just take the taxi."

I pondered my response.

My pain was so severe that I abandoned all arguments.

I nodded and closed my eyes again.

I dozed off in the short amount of time we waited to get picked up.

Mon tapped my shoulder and though my eyelids were heavy, I forced them open.

"The cab is here."

"Okay."

I slowly got up.

There was a sharp pain behind my eyeballs and I winced.

"Are you alright?" She asked, worried.

"It hurts," My hand went up to my temple.

Every nerve in my body felt constricted.

It was hard to keep my eyes open and the floor seems tilted.

"Let me help you," Her hand was on my waist as she slowly guided me upright.

We walked to my desk to get my purse.

"I'll carry this," She slung the bag on her shoulder and led me outside.

It was a slow walk to the first floor but it felt good to have her so close to me.

Her fingers pressed my waist to steady me and I placed one arm on her shoulder to keep my balance.

Mon helped sat me down inside the cab and I gave the driver my address.

Once Mon got in, I leaned on the seat and slept.

I woke up with my head on her shoulder and blurry dreams of a sweet candy scent.

"We're here," She said in a soft voice.