Chapter 56: Taking Time

After I left JJ's I immediately went home and packed everything I needed for a week or so at my parents' house. On the way to my apartment I called my mom and explained the situation. She was terrified because I was in shambles when she answered. All of the grief and pain I had pushed down for weeks for the sake of the others came rushing back in waves as soon as I heard my mother's voice say "hey, sweetie!" When I caught my breath I told my mom I was coming home and that I needed her. She had no objections, she just wanted to be sure I was going to make it home safe if I was driving with all of these emotions. I explained that I would be fine, but I still couldn't wait to get home. I think Ryder was concerned about my erratic behavior when I walked inside, barely stopping to pet him after letting him out of the crate. I quickly packed up my stuff for a week, clothes, toiletries, technology so I could work remotely, etc. I'm not going to be able to do a lot of work remotely but I'm definitely going to try. I feel guilty leaving without saying anything to Spencer, but I can't jeopardize their case or worry him while I leave. JJ knows I'm leaving as well as Alison and Killian and of course my parents know. I pack up my suitcase and I have a bag of random things for Ryder and myself. I keep a baseball bat in my car in addition to a car emergency kit, a first aid kit, blankets, water bottles, and snacks. Before I leave the apartment I make sure it's clean. The dishes are done, the laundry is folded and put away, the bed is made, pretty much everything is in its place. I decide to write a note for Spencer explaining that I decided to go home for a trip to mourn the loss of Emily and I'll be back soon. Hopefully JJ and the rest of the team can break the news gently before he comes home to an empty and clean apartment. The clean apartment will be a dead giveaway that I'm not there because you can usually tell when it's being lived in, especially when we are both home for at least a few days. With a deep breath and a heavy heart, Ryder and I leave the dark and empty apartment, locking the door behind us. We carefully make our way through town before hopping on I95 towards Tennessee. Ryder is set up as copilot in his harness and seat belt in his travel bed. He curls up to take a nap, remembering the last time we packed up the car like this and took a drive. I turn on a murder mystery podcast and mentally prepare for the 12 hour drive home. It's 10:30 am, so let's see how long it takes me to get home and into the warm embrace of my parents.

•••••

~Spencer's POV~

The cases following Emily's death have been very surreal. Everyone on the team has been treating me like a ticking time bomb since we got to the station. Hotch had previously sent me to talk to the sheriff as soon as we got to the station in San Diego and when I came back, everybody avoided eye contact with me. I tried to shrug it off, I knew I had been a bit moody lately, but I didn't think I had earned this cold of a shoulder. I decided to just brush it off and get to work on the geographic profile for the unsub. I heard a lot of whispers behind my back, but just assumed it was regarding something about Emily or me and the team just didn't want to upset me. They always treat me like the baby of the group, especially Morgan, and I absolutely hate it. Morgan and I have to go visit the crime scene and he gives me very short responses for the most part, not making conversation. In the SUV on the way back, I ask him "did I do something to upset somebody?" He raises an eyebrow and responds "I don't know, did you?" I roll my eyes and say back "I don't know, that's why I'm asking you! Everybody has been treating me differently lately, but especially on this case." Morgan nods and says "everybody has just been affected by Emily's death more than I think you have considered. I know you're taking it really hard, but so are the rest of us. I miss her, too, but we have to keep going. The world doesn't start and end with Prentiss. You and I both know that." I nod silently, not knowing what to say at the moment. I eventually decide to say "I know I've been a lot to handle lately. I've been trying to do better, especially at home with Annie. She's gotten the worst of it." Morgan nods and says "you probably need to try more, kid. She's taking this hard, too, and she's coped by taking care of you and focusing on you. She's basically procrastinating her grief and the longer she does that, the harder she will fall when it finally hits her. Open your eyes, you love her too much to be this self centered. I know you weren't meaning to be, but you've had your time and now you need to help her. You feel me?" I nod, humbled by the honesty of Morgan's words. He's completely right. I've been a selfish dick. I tell him "I should call her and apologize." Morgan shakes his head "nah wait until later, it's the middle of the work day now and you'd probably make her cry if you got all sappy." I chuckle and nod, he's right. The next day we go back to the station and get right back to work. I couldn't be grieving or worried about Annie if I wanted to be with how much I'm working to try to figure out this case. The only good thing that has come from Prentiss' death has been that it really put a lot of things into perspective for Seaver. She's been a lot nicer, a lot easier to work with these last few cases. If only she could've behaved this way the whole time? When I've wrapped up the geographic profile and take a momentary break, Seaver walks up to me and she looks like she has something to say. I make eye contact with her and wait for her to say what she walked up to say. She finally says "I'm sorry I harassed you my entire time here and insulted your fiancé. You're both really good people and didn't deserve that. I guess I was just scared and decided to begin on the offensive. You know, be mean to people before they can be mean to me first. I anticipated being treated awfully here as the rookie, but I was wildly wrong. I hope you can forgive me." She doesn't wait for me to answer, she walks away before I can. Before I can do anything else in response, the team starts gearing up for the possible take down of the unsub. The takedown goes well, Seaver is a big help and talks the unsub down, but we still lost the unsub in the end. We wrap everything up in San Diego, leaving to get on the jet after everything is settled at the station. Everybody is quiet, still somber. However, Seaver seems different, like she has peace with herself and with the job. She should, she did well today in the field. I get on the jet with everybody and prepare for the flight to take off. It'll be a long one back to DC from San Diego. I decide I should call Annie and see how she's doing and really check in on her. When I go to call her though, my phone keeps displaying an error message and saying it can't connect to the service provider. I've never had this error message before and don't know what to do. I look around and ask Morgan if he knows and he shakes his head. He says "after we get in the air see if you can video chat with Garcia and maybe she can help." I nod "good idea." I settle in, preparing for takeoff as the jet taxis on the runway. Once we level off in the air I ask Morgan to video chat with her and he nods, getting it set up. He looks around at everybody else, making eye contact, all of them sharing a look that's making me nervous. Garcia's face appears on the screen and, instead of her perky bubbly self, she seems pretty serious. She gives a serious half smile and asks "calling about service provider issues?" I nod "yes, how did you know?" She gives me a sad smile "because I made it happen. We can't let you call Annie right now, boy wonder." I look around at the team, very confused about what's happening. I try to read everybody's expressions and figure out what on earth is happening right now. I ask "is Annie okay?" Hotch nods and says "yes, she's fine and she's safe. She's home in Tennessee." I'm utterly confused at his statement "what? Why is she in Tennessee? Are her parents okay?" Rossi speaks up "everybody is fine, nobody is hurt. Annie just needed to grieve and she needed her support system." I give them an incredulous expression "what? I'm her support system?" Morgan sighs and says "this is what I was trying to talk to you about before. She was your support system, but you haven't been hers. She talked to JJ and said she felt guilty asking you to support her in her grieving when you were struggling with it, too." I look down and shake my head "why didn't she tell me this herself? I can do better, I didn't know she felt this way." Morgan continues "we all know you can, we need to lean on each other more instead of leaning on others to the point of hurting them. You love Annie and we all know you didn't hurt her or neglect her on purpose, this has just been a hard time for everybody." I turn to look between Morgan and Hotch "when did she leave for Tennessee?" They share a silent look and neither wants to answer. I say again more forcefully "how long has Annie been in Tennessee?" Hotch tells me in his business tone "she left the morning we left for San Diego." I stand up, enraged that they kept this information from me for this long. I rub my eye harshly as I say "She's been in Tennessee for 4 days without my knowledge?! When were you going to tell me?!" Morgan looks at me and asks "you done?" I shake my head, feeling my nostrils flare and my face turn red. "You all let me work for days across the country when my fiancée was having an emotional crisis bad enough she had to travel 670 miles out of the blue? What kind of team - no - what kind of friends are you all?" Hotch speaks up "we didn't tell you at the request of Annie. She didn't want you to be distracted from the case." I continue rubbing my eyes out of anxiety and stress. I sit back down and hold my hands in my head. I look up and say "I need to book a flight. Garcia, please fix my phone so I can book a flight to Nashville." I hear Garcia say quietly through the speaker on the laptop "I can't let you do that. Annie told me that you needed at least a few hours to process the information before following her to Tennessee." I angrily hit my hand on the couch. I look at Morgan and ask "why do I feel like I'm losing her?" Morgan looks at me seriously "you are not losing her. She communicated with you, albeit a bit delayed, and she plans on coming back. Everybody needs a break sometimes, especially breaks to see family. She took care of us for weeks without a care to herself or her own grief. She's earned a reprieve. Don't be mad at her." I sigh "I'm not mad at her. I'm mad at myself...and a little mad at you guys for keeping this from me." Hotch nods "we thought you would be. We were okay with that. In the end, we wanted to help you, both of you. Losing Emily has been hard on all of us and sometimes a different perspective is necessary. It's going to be okay. Just give her time and space." I nod. I tell them "if you won't let me buy a plane ticket, then I will drive to Tennessee. I am not going to let her think I will just sit idly by and not be there for her. She may not want me there, but I want to be close by in case that changes. I'll stay in a hotel if I have to, just to make sure she knows I love her and support her. I had no idea she had taken Emily's death so hard." Garcia speaks up "Spencer, Emily was going to be a bridesmaid in your wedding. She was close to Emily, maybe not as close as you were, but close considering they'd only known each other for like a year." I sigh and nod "you're right." Garcia says "okay, you've got a little under 5 hours to cool off before you land. If you still want to fly out to see her I will reserve the ticket myself, the fastest one available." Morgan speaks up "and I'll drive you to the airport. We are here for you kid." I smile gratefully and nod once, "thanks you guys. I appreciate it." I try to rest on the flight home, but my mind is running wild trying to come up with a plan to help Annie and to make things up to her. I feel like an absolute selfish idiot. How did I not notice what was going on? Did my pushing for sex finally push her over the edge? Is it my fault she had to go home? All of the questions swirling around my brain have me rubbing my eyes aggressively in a constant manner. Morgan gently shakes my shoulder "kid, stop that. You're going to hurt yourself." I pull my shaking hands away from my face, nodding silently. I don't know how much time has passed, but I closed my eyes and now I open my eyes to find that we are landing. I guess I finally did fall asleep, for how long? I don't know. Once we have landed I find that my phone is back to normal. I call Garcia and before I can say anything "the flight is booked, I sent the information to your phone." I try to ask her how and why, but before I can she says "I bought the plane ticket as soon as I hung up the video call. I knew you wouldn't change your mind. Should Annie decide she needs her space, there's a reservation waiting for you at the Embassy Suites. You can cancel it for free if things work out." I tell her "thank you, Garcia." I can almost hear her smile as she says "you are welcome, Penny G over and out," and with that she hangs up. Morgan looks at me from his car "you coming?" I give him a half smile and nod, walking over to his car and hopping in the passenger seat. After a mad dash through airport security and barely making it on the flight Garcia had arranged for me, I am now in the Nashville international airport, making my way towards the car rental place by baggage claim. It wasn't very populated and they had a few options available. They end up giving me a white Nissan Altima which was more than enough. I drive to Annie's hometown, playing and replaying what I should say to her when I get to her parents' house. I am still so angry at myself for letting things get to this point. I can't help but think she wouldn't have had to miss work and go home if I had just been a better partner, a more supportive partner. The hour drive drags as I drive on I40 with all the semi truck drivers driving their normal routes. Eventually I make it in the city limits and drive into Annie's neighborhood. I'm more nervous this time to go to her parents' house than I was when we came here for Christmas. It's an hour earlier here so it's just hitting 8 pm now. I park the rental car on the street and decide to just leave my bag in the car, not wanting to seem presumptuous. With sweaty hands and a rapidly beating heart I walk up the front steps and knock on the front door. A minute or so passes before the door unlocks and swings open to reveal Annie.

~Annie's POV~

I can't believe my eyes. Spencer is here in front of me. I at least expected a warning from somebody on the team that he was on the way here. Instead, here I am in an old stained t shirt from undergrad, plaid pajama pants, and fluffy slippers with my glasses on, no makeup, and my hair in a greasy top knot in desperate need of being washed. Despite all of that, Spencer looks at me like I've hung the moon and stars just for him. Still, I feel self conscious and fold my arms in front of my chest. I ask him "what are you doing here?" He looks taken aback at the blunt words that have fallen out of my mouth. He looks down, hurt, and says "I know I haven't been supportive like I should've been. I'm sorry for that. I couldn't knowingly go stay in our apartment alone while you were here mourning. If you don't want me here I understand, but I'll be staying nearby in a hotel in case something comes up. I don't want to be in DC and you suddenly find you need me or just want me to be with you during this process. I know I've been a self centered prick and I'm sorry. Please forgive me." I had no intention of turning him away when I considered the fact that he might come here looking for me when he found out I left. However, now I'm afraid all of the progress I've made this week will just slip away and I'll focus on Spencer and not me all over again. I'll slap a band aid on the almost healed bullet wound and leave it be, never realizing it needed more care until the sepsis has set in to the wound. I sigh and I tell him "Spencer, I forgive you, but I still need space. I need my mom right now. I appreciate you staying in the area and I know there's nothing I can do to convince you to go back to DC. We will come home soon, I promise." Spencer furrows his brow and asks "we?" As if on cue, I hear the pitter patter of little paws and claws on the hardwood floor. I turn and open the door just enough for Ryder to see Spencer in the doorway. Ryder loses all composure and runs full speed ahead to Spencer. Spencer's face lights up at the realization and he picks up Ryder when he nearly tumbles at his feet. Ryder tries to kiss Spencer's face as Spencer chuckles, trying to get him to situate in his arms enough to say hi. I stand there with my arms folded and a soft smile. I look at Spencer and say quietly "he missed his dad." Spencer smiles and scratches behind Ryder's ears with his free hand. I reach to take Ryder back and Spencer reluctantly hands me the 15 or so pounds of fluff. I give him a half smile and say "the wedding is still on, I still love you, so much, I just need some time to grieve alone. If I need support, I have it in my parents. I just know if I let you back in before I've done the bulk of my grieving then it will never get done." Spencer nods, still looking a bit like a kicked puppy. He gives me a half smile and says "I'll be at the Embassy Suites. I'll text you my room number in case you decide to visit?" I smile and nod "sounds good, Spence." He gives me an awkward smile and waves before walking back to the rental car he drove here in, I'm guessing. He gets about halfway there before he turns back, walking with purpose. He says "I forgot something." He takes my face in his hands and plants his lips on mine. He pulls away after a few seconds and says quietly "I love you, Annie." I smile, having to mentally strengthen my resolve to not pull him into the house by his tie. I tell him softly "I love you, too, Spence. Just give me a few more days?" He nods and I peck him one more time on the lips before he turns to leave again. I have to turn and shut the door before I nearly change my mind again. I watch through the window to make sure he drives away safely before walking back into the kitchen where my mom is steeping a mug of tea. My mom gives me a sad smile and says "you're torturing that poor boy." I laugh slightly, embarrassed, knowing she just listened to that whole exchange. I ask her "how much did you hear?" She smiles "all of it, who do you think sent Ryder to you?" I groan and tell her "I know if I let him back into my head before I'm ready then I'll never work through these feelings." My mom sighs and asks "what happened between you two? What was so bad that you had to leave DC and come here?" I sigh and tell her "it was just a bit...complicated. All of it. Spencer's team has been through a lot, more than anybody should have to go through. Once I knew they were all okay I assumed I was, too, but I was wrong." My mom asks with a sigh "what happened, Annie?" I look at her and say "mom, you really don't want to know." She looks concerned "did he hit you?" I furrow my brows in confusion "what? No! Of course not!" She sighs with exasperation "then what happened?!" I sigh with my own exasperation before saying without looking her in the eye "I had a panic attack while he was eating me out, okay? Happy?" My mom's jaw drops and she buffers for a second, no idea what to say. She says "not particularly." I give her an awkward smile and tell her "you asked!" She nods "I did and I should've listened to you because I really didn't want to hear that or know that or think about it." I shrug and tell her "hind sight really is 20/20." She hums and says "I'm going to go to bed now, I don't think I can look you in the eye right now. How about in the morning we just pretend we never had this conversation, yeah?" I nod "sounds good, mom." She goes to bed and I go to take Ryder out one more time before we go to bed. We walk out into the front yard, it's better lit than the back yard and has a ring camera monitoring it. I have Ryder on a leash and he's exploring a bit, procrastinating the real reason we are here. Eventually he does his business and returns to exploring. As he's sniffing around, particularly interested in one tree, I hear a distinct sound of a branch snapping at the tree line. My head snaps up and Ryder starts barking like a maniac. I scan the tree line for any sign of a person or animal. I don't see anything, but I know better than to be the dumb white girl in a horror movie. Ryder and I book it back into the house, locking the door and setting the alarm before going to bed. I could've sworn I saw a shadow across the street when I was closing the front door, but I decided it was probably just my imagination and a raccoon or a fox probably made the noise and made Ryder go crazy.

•••••

The next morning I wake up and eat breakfast with my parents before they go off to work. I spend the morning getting some paperwork done for the hospital and check my phone to see a text from Spencer. He asks me in the text if he can do his laundry here since he didn't have time to re pack his go bag before coming straight here. I text him that that'll be fine and tell him to come over whenever. I'm sitting in the kitchen drinking a Diet Coke and typing up a report for the hospital when the doorbell rings. Ryder goes wild, barking at the door like it will reveal a burglar or a murderer. I walk over and look through the window to confirm that it is Spencer and not some random person at the front door. I open the door and give him a soft smile. He's standing there in black pants, a light blue button up shirt, a purple tie, and his converse. I ask him "if you wanted to see me you could've just asked." He chuckles lightly and looks down "while that is part of why I texted you, I really do need to do laundry and I didn't want to find a laundromat." I nod and gesture for him to follow me inside. He follows me to the laundry room and I take his laundry from his bag, throwing it in the washer. I turn to him "I may or may not have brought some of your clothes with me. Would you like to change into those so I can wash these or are these okay?" He looks a bit shocked and he says "actually that would be great." I give him a soft smile and nod. I tell him "strip and put the clothes in the washer and I'll run get you an outfit from my room. He looks shocked and I giggle "I'm the only one home and it's not like I haven't seen you naked before. Relax." He nods and reluctantly begins to remove his clothes as I quickly go to my room. I grab a pair of his boxers, a pair of his sweatpants, and a graphic t shirt of his from my suitcase. His clothes comfort me, so I tend to sleep in them a lot. I bring him the clothes and he looks happily surprised that I actually had socially acceptable clothes for him. He was still wearing his boxers when I came back so I hand him the clothes and turn to go back to the kitchen to give him a bit of privacy. He changes quickly and follows me into the kitchen. I ask him "do you want anything to eat or drink?" He gives me a soft smile and shakes his head. He sits down across from me and says "I really am sorry I wasn't there for you like I should've been. Please come home." I give him a gentle sad smile and tell him "Spencer, this isn't to punish you. If I was doing this to punish you then you wouldn't be here right now. I just need some space to grieve without feeling like I haven't earned it." Spencer looks utterly confused "why don't you feel like you've earned the right to grieve Emily?" I shrug and sigh. I tell him "you all knew her for years longer than I did. I just saw her at parties or when the team would go out. She was super fun and I loved hanging out with her. I wouldn't say we were best friends or anything, but she was a regular installment in my life. For you, however, she's saved your life. She's been with you in life or death situations. I couldn't compete with that so I knew if I was struggling to grieve her, then the rest of you had to be struggling ten times worse. So I pushed down my feelings to make sure you all were taken care of in the moment." Spencer looks at me softly and says "Annie, you don't have to earn the right to grieve anybody. Yes we knew her longer and were closer to her, but you lost her, too." I nod in response. I tell him "I know you're right, I'm just having to separate myself from everything and everyone to really work through this in the best way possible. Just give me a few more days. This has really helped me." Spencer gives me a half smile and nods. He tells me "I feel awful that I didn't notice how much you were hurting. Especially that I pushed you into trying to be intimate before you were ready. I never want you to have to color out with me, especially not in very vanilla scenes. I want us to have the safe words, but I want to be so good at reading you that you hardly have to use them." I walk over to Spencer and take his face in my hands. I tell him "you are amazing at reading me. Just because you missed the signals a time or two doesn't mean you can't read me or that you're a bad partner. What makes you a good partner is that you listen when I do use a safeword. I know every time we do anything that I have control in the situation and I can get out and end it any time I want. You've never forced me to do anything I don't want to do, and I feel very safe and comfortable with you." Spencer smiles and leans into my touch. He says softly "I've missed your touch. So much." I smile softly and nod. I gently take the hand he hasn't nuzzled into and gently scratch his scalp. He sighs contently and leans into the sensations. After a few minutes of comfortable silence, Spencer asks me "can I ask what happened? That night?" I sigh and nod "I just don't think I was ready yet. It had been so long and I was feeling very insecure. Mentally and emotionally I was hurting and trying to throw intimacy on top of that just didn't work. It wasn't you, you did everything right. My mind and body just weren't ready after a few weeks off." Spencer nods. He asks "is it because of him? Have you been having the nightmares again?" I sigh and shrug my shoulders "maybe, I don't know. I just haven't felt safe in weeks, not even in my own skin." Spencer gives me his concerned eyes and searches my face for anything he can read to clue him in on how I'm feeling. Honestly, if he can figure it out that would be great and then he could tell me. I sigh and tell him "I need to get back to work, but you can hang out in here or in another room while your clothes are being washed." He nods and looks from my lips to my eyes and back again before slowly leaning up to peck my lips. I smile and return the kiss. I don't let it get too intense and pull away before it can go too far. I giggle and tell him "you're not in trouble. I just need some time to process." Spencer nods, standing to leave the room "I'll wait for you as long as I have to, Annie." I smile and blush at that, watching him walk away. I work on the forms for the hospital, getting immersed in the activity until I hear the washer stop. I stand up to move everything over. Some of his clothes have to air dry so I pull out the drying rack so that they can. Once I get the dryer started again I feel his arms wrap around my waist. I jump slightly because I thought he was still sitting in the living room. He kisses my neck and says "thank you for doing that." I hum a response. Before I can move, he turns me around and lifts me, setting me on the washing machine. He kisses me like it might be the last time. He pulls my body into his and I don't have the willpower to stop it right now. I've missed this and him, too. Spencer rubs circles into my hips before moving his hands up to knead my breasts. I let out a soft moan at the feeling and he tries to remove my shirt. I tell him "Spencer, stop. I'm not ready yet." Spencer pulls back with a bit of a reluctant sigh. I tell him "I don't want our first time after such a long dry spell to be on top of the washer in my parents' house in the middle of the day, either." He chuckles and nods "that makes sense." I hop down off the washer and move back to the kitchen. I get back to work while his stuff is drying and I hear Ryder follow Spencer into the living room, playing with him. I smile to myself and continue working. I work for hours until I hear my mom come in from working at the school. She sees Spencer and waves, she asks "what are you doing here, sweetie?" Spencer tells her "I just needed to do some laundry. I came straight from a case and most of my clothes were dirty." My mom nods and says "well you're welcome to our washer and dryer any time." Spencer thanks her and she walks into the kitchen to see me. She tells me in a whisper "I'll never look at either of you the same again." I giggle at that and tell her "maybe you won't be so nosy and ask pushy questions." She tells me with a laugh "sadly, I don't think those days will ever be over." Spencer comes into the kitchen and says "the dryer is done so I think I'll just grab what's ready now and come back later tonight to get what has to air dry." I nod "sounds good, Spence." I hear him put the dry clothes in his go bag and he gives me a chaste kiss on the lips before saying goodbye and leaving. Man, it is so hard to not stop him from leaving me. My mom asks me "did y'all talk?" I nod "yeah we had some good conversations. I think I'll be ready in a day or two. I just know if he's here I'll push all of my feelings down and only worry about him. It's not because he makes me, I just love him and care for him so much it's almost an automatic response." My mom nods "I know what you mean." She pats my shoulder gently before leaving the room. I work for a few more hours and stop around the time that my dad gets home. I visit with him and talk to him about his day while my mom gets started on dinner. After a few minutes, I offer to help my mom with dinner while my dad takes a few minutes to unwind in his office after work. I help mom prep the vegetables for the salad and I help her cook the poppyseed chicken that's for dinner. When we are sitting down for dinner, there's a knock on the door and the doorbell rings. I go to answer and see Spencer there. He smiles shyly and says "hey, I was just coming to pick up my clothes? I didn't want to come back here too late." I smile and nod before asking him "want to stay for dinner? We just set the table." He looks unsure and says "I don't know, I don't want to intrude." I give him a soft smile and shake my head "you won't, come on." I grab his hand and pull him in, both of my parents welcoming him with open arms. The dinner goes well, we just make small talk among the four of us. It was like old times, it was happy and comfortable. Spencer is a great addition to this family and I am so happy my parents see him for the wonderful man he is. Spencer scarfs down his food, it makes me worry he hasn't been eating much since I left. Spencer laughs at the stories my parents tell on me, like how I was terrified of the car wash as a child or that I used to call this local gas station that had a horse painted on the side of it "horsey gas" and I would beg my mom to go there instead of the other gas station where there was a car wash. I was a very observant toddler, I guess. Spencer finds that story hilarious and I just have a feeling any time we talk about gas stations or horses from now on he will bring up that story. Spencer gives me a soft smile and says "don't be embarrassed, I think it's cute." I glare at him just slightly as I respond "it is embarrassing." Spencer chuckles and shakes his head, gingerly moving his hand to rub my leg. I welcome the physical touch when Spencer shows some uncertainty, leaning into the touch. Spencer smiles warmly at me, very content in the moment. My parents continue to tell stories, the one that has us all laughing the most is my mom telling the story where she accidentally drove onto a barge. Spencer laughs so hard he has tears in his eyes. He looks to my dad and says "I guess that is what I have to look forward to for the rest of my life?" My dad laughs and nods "she's just like her mother, that's for sure." I scoff "I got your negotiation and arguing skills, though." My dad nods as he sips his tea before saying "touché." Spencer and I do the dishes while my parents spend time watching tv together in the living room. Spencer and I laugh and talk while we work together. I tell him "hey, do you want to get breakfast in the morning? There's a nice coffee shop in town, it's called the 'Morning Grind.' We could meet there?" Spencer's face lights up and he nods "that sounds wonderful, I would love that." I blush and look down "great, it's a date." Spencer gently takes his hand, still wet from the dishes, and lifts my chin before connecting our lips. He pulls away after our lips barely touch. He tells me "thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you for staying." I give him a soft smile "I would never leave you, Spence. Not voluntarily." Spencer smiles in response "me either." Once we finish the dishes we decide to call it a night. Spencer says goodbye briefly to my parents and I follow him out to his car by the street. I'm in leggings and a sweatshirt with fuzzy slippers standing in the street. He leans down and kisses me, it starts to get heated and we both pull away, not wanting any of my neighbors to see me sucking my fiancé's face in the street like a teenager. Spencer looks at me and asks "8 am tomorrow morning?" I nod "see you then." He gets in the car and I watch him drive off down the street before slowly walking back up through the yard to the front door. As I'm walking I hear what sounds like crunching of leaves and branches. I turn, expecting to see a neighbor walking their dog before bed, but instead see a hooded figure stalking towards me. I turn to run, but I don't make it far before I feel a sharp pain in the back of my head and the world goes dark as I hit the hard ground of the yard beneath me.