Deadly Game - Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Adina looks so pretty in her dress. I walk side by side with her and Will to the reaping. It is a tradition. The Danner's have a moment of their own, and we have our own little walk, just we Wildeman's. We are practically a part of their family, seeing as they adopted us, but we still have our own surname, we have no concrete connection to them.

And all I want is to let go of Adina and Will, and rush to find Riccy.

But I don't. I walk with my family, like a good girl should, and when we reach the reaping I pull both Adina and Will into a hug. We stand there, embracing each other, and I suddenly feel so strong connections to them. Once again, I am a part of their family, open and useful. I know that I have let them down when our parents died, but now I am back, stronger than ever. I can do anything for them.

"I love you forever, remember that. "

Will steps back, and Adinas little body is pressed so hard against me that I almost can't breathe. I bury my face in her hair, and realize that she is shaking.

"Don't be afraid, Adina. It'll be okay. Just be a good girl for Cassidy, and don't cry. If you do, you show them that you're weak, and that is not something they need to know. I love you, honey."

"Cassie, promise you won't be chosen. Promise."

"I can't, baby girl, I can't." I would never promise her something I can't keep. Lying to Will about my suicide plans is one thing, but lying to my innocent little sister is completely unthinkable.

Will hugs Adina too, and then she is drawn into Suzanne's arms, allowing me and Will to embrace each other. I hug him tight, and almost stared crying.

"I feel it, Will. I'm going to be chosen today," I whisper.

"It's now or never, Cassidy. It's now or never." He doesn't deny it. He doesn't say that I'm wrong. Somehow that's more comforting, knowing he isn't lying to me.

My eyes meet his, and I see his fear, even though he tries to hide it. Then we break apart, and I go to hug Suzanne, Greg, and Eric, like I always do. The hugs have their own system. Firstly, we say goodbye to all our family members, then to those who will be left back here, those who aren't of age 12 to 18. Then I hug Brendt, then Will again, and last of the boys is Riccy. His smile is forced. I cling to him for a moment longer than necessary, and then the boys go to their places, Riccy with a last agonized gaze at me.

After that, we three girls walk in silence into the area inside the ropes. Before Denaly goes to stand with the other seventeen year old's, she hugs us both.

"Be strong, Cassidy, just like Viveca was." Denlay's words make me wonder. Was Viveca also always this scared before the reaping? How on earth could she manage to face the fear of stepping up onto the stage, to face her own death? I have no idea.

Melli and I have no words to share. Our silence says more than thousand words ever can. We hold hands, and I can't help thinking that this is the end.

I stare at the glass ball. I stare at the many white, neatly folded papers. Those papers can be my death. Don't call my name, I beg you. Not me, not me, not me, notmenotmenotme...

'Cause if I die, who will be there for Adina? Who will stop Will from working himself to death in a desperate try to keep Adina and me alive?

I've never been this scared before. Not even that night when we waited, knowing it was a waste. They wouldn't come back.

Not even in the morning, when I'd heard it. Not even then, knowing we would probably die too, knowing our lives were forever changed.

Not one single second of my life have I been this scared.

Last year was so different. No fear. We knew there were no chances that we would be forced into the game. There have always been volunteering tributes, but not this year. No families can give away chances to get more money, more food.

District 4 is a quite rich district, but this year a mysterious disease has spread into the fish, and it can not be eaten without getting symptoms. And the disease leads to a certain death. Everyone needs the money that will come from winning the Hunger Games, but not one single girl or boy can risk their lives this year. Their help is needed in order for their families to stay alive.

And I know what will happen next.

I have seen it, in my dreams. I have feared it, for so long. I feel it, feel the knot in my stomach, and know my intuition is right.

This year, it will be my name.

I glance backwards, meeting Adina's gaze. My six year old little sister stands in her best dress beside Melisea's mum. Her blue eyes meet mine, and I see that she understands. This is going to be goodbye.

Will stands a few feet from me, with the other fourteen year old boys, his face is serious and pale. He doesn't look at me, but I know that he feels my eyes on him, 'cause his lips move. Without even looking, I can read which words his lips form. Be brave. We'll make it.

Those words have been repeated over and over again, since we've lost them. We've said them to each other so often, that it feel like they will come true some day.

But not today.

Please, let me be wrong.

The woman's hand moves into the glass ball, and I see how she grabs one folded paper. I close my eyes. In my head I see all the faces, faces of people who I love and care about. Will, Adina, Mum, Dad, Melisea, and her family...

"Cassidy Wildeman."

My name rings through the air, and my fear almost suffocates me.

I hold my head high and squeeze Melisea's hand reassuringly, and her beautiful face is streaked with tears. Then I walk towards the scene.

I am going to die, but I'm not going to break. My death will be in true Cassie's style: I will die fighting for my life.

Cassidy Wildeman would never die without a fight.

Each step takes me closer to the stage, and each step takes me closer to death.

I hear a heartbreaking scream from behind, hear Adina's sorrow. And suddenly, I understand. I understand how Viveca had managed to face her fear.

Because she had to.

There is no way out.