Part 40

The sun was already filtering through the blinds by the time I woke up the next morning.

My eyes fluttered open slowly, trying to adjust to the bright light. I blicked around the room, a little confused. This was not my room.

It took me a second to register that it was infact Billies bedroom I woke up in. It took even a second longer until the events of last night filled my brain again.

Billie had confessed her feelings for me.

And

We kissed. I instantly touched my lips at the thought of the kiss - the way her lips had been so soft and perfect against my own. It had been magical.

But at the same time, regret clouded my mind. All of this was moving so fast, and even though I really liked Billie too, prejudice about what happened still lingered in the back of my mind.

Maybe I should go. That thought creeped in. Maybe it would make this whole thing easier. I shouldn't have stayed last night. Or at least should have returned to the guest room. In general I should have put a surten distance between us.

I wasn't really sure about where I wanted to take this between Billie and I. Eventhoug, I had sounded pretty clear about what I wanted last night. I wasn't so sure anymore.

Billie murmured something behind me in her sleep, pushing her cheek against my back. Her arm was lazily draped over my waist.

I froze a little with Billies' movement.

She wasn't awake, still sound asleep, but still I was scared that only the tiniest movement by me would wake her up.

I should really go. It wasn't fair to Billie to get her hopes up if I wasn't sure what I wanted. And second of all, I had things to do. I couldn't lay in bed with Billie all day. I had a life .

But I didn't move. I stayed where I was , tangled in Billies' sheets with her pressed against my back.

I let myself sink into her touch for just a little longer , savoring the moment.

But I slipped from underneath her neverertheless. I was careful not to wake her up. I told myself it was because I didn't want to disrupt her sleep, but the truth was, I dont think I could have stood the look on her face if she caught me sneaking off.

I placed a pillow under her arm, which had rested on my waist only seconds ago.

I carefully closed her bedroom door behind me before returning to the guest room to gather my things.

Shark was still passed out on the couch where he had staggered to last night. Soft snores escaped his mouth just like they did Billies.

I pulled my head away from him and stepped outside the door. But not before leaving a note on the coffetable in her living room. I wasn't a total asshole.

" Had to head out. Didn't what to wake you. We need to talk, though.- Valerie "

It's funny that I wrote " we need to talk" because 3 days later, and I still hadn't heard from her. No text, no call, not any kind of contact at all. Which was weird because only a few nights ago she confessed her feelings for me and told me she wanted to try again and now she couldn't even reach out. Sure, I could have reached out as well, but I was too deep into work to really care.

It only kept me up longer at night when I was supposed to sleep, staring at my phone a little longer waiting for a text, but nothing came.

The deadline for my portfolio was on Friday, so 2 days away. To say that I was stressed was a huge understatement. I would have rather peeled of my skin then go through does threatening times again.

I sat once again at my overflowing desk. Prints, sketches, and other things were scattered around my laptop. I was working on the final touches of my portfolio, or at least I hoped so. I didn't want to turn it in in the last second, so I was planning on sending it off tomorrow already.

Maybe I was hoping for some extra points for turning it in earlier but to be honest I just wanted get this shit away for me because if it was in my possession anylonger I would probably just mess it up.

I climbed of my desk chair and strolled out of my room. The kitchen was only dimly lit , Chris was sitting alone at the kitchen island.

"Why are you still up?" I asked, flopping down on the chair next to him. " Could ask you the same thing."

I shrugged, and he did the same thing.

We sat in silence for a second before he pulled out his phone and opened tiktok. He laid it down on the counter in between us. We laughed at some stupid things, Chris losing it every time a cat video came on, which was often.

Some time during a video where a cat was getting scared by a cucumber and Chris snorting  , Grace stormed out of her room and told us to chime it down.

The next morning, I slept in longer than usual. Somehow, the pressure had faithed somewhere between watching tiktoks with Chris in the kitchen and sleeping.

By the time the afternoon came around, I had finished my portfolio with all of my photographs. " Grace , I can't do it . Can you click send for me, please? " I whined , sitting in front of my laptop. The email was fully written, and in the attachment was my portfolio. The only thing I had to do now was send it off. But I couldn't. I was scared.

"Omg, just do it. It won't kill you." Grace said, her tone annoyed with how dramatic I was. " But what if it will?!"

Grace groaned.

" It wont Valerie Jesus." She flopped backward onto my bed.

" Agh, I can't." I said my head, hitting my desk with a loud bang. "Ouch."

"You're being dramatic. " Grace said, getting off my bed and walking over. Before I could even lift my head back up, I heard a click.

" There you go." Grace said, proud.

"Did you just -" I almost shouted. She actually sent it off. I know I told her to do it, but I didn't think she would do it.

There was no going back now.

Later that evening I got an email from Miranda my boss thanking me for submitting my portfolio, saying that she would go through it and then told me that she wanted me to be at a shoot for the new vogue cover tomorrow.

I was only going to watch, of course, but still, this felt huge. Miranda mentioned that the face of the vogue cover would be a celebrity but  didn't specify who exactly.

I didn't push. Didn't want to seem to be invasive.

I didn't get much sleep that night because I was way too nervous and excited. So, by the time the next morning rolled around, I felt like a zombie. " You want a coffee. Because you look horrible, Valerie. " Chris laughed as I walked into the kitchen.

" Funny." I muttered but nooded anyway. The coffee was the only thing that kept me alive.

Chris offered to drive me to the studio where the photoshoot would take place.Obviously, I accepted because I wasn't gonna take a bus to Hollywood . I still had a little will to live .

The buses to Hollywood were horrible. Always filled to the brim with tourists, all sweaty and screaming. And going by car would save me a lot of time. Time I needed to make myself look presentable.

Chris tried to calm me a little by playing some positive music to lift the vibe.

" It's gonna be grand." He told me as we arrived at the studio. I nooded franticly trying to convince myself everything was gonna be fine.

"You seriously need to chill, Valerie. Everything's gonna be fine. You'll take some notes on things they're doing , or I dont know. And maybe you give some input. "

" Oh no, I'm not gonna give any input. I dont want to get fired. I'll be quiet in the corner and not be in anyone's way." I explained my hand, clutching onto my bag.

" Well, that's also a plan, I guess." He chuckled before throwing me out of the car. Apparently, he had plans with Simon. He claims they're not a thing, but I knew he was lying. But I didn't push. He would come around and tell me himself.

The studio was filled with people and equipment. I was buzzing with excitement, though I felt like a lost puppy at the same time.

I didn't know any of those people and I didn't know where I should go.

Luckily, I spotted Emily, Miranda's assistant. We had kind of become work friends over time. Lowkey, she felt like a big sister at work , always helping me out with things.

"Hey Emily. " I exclaimed as I made my way over to her.

"Valerie, so good to see you. Miranda won't be here today. She got caught up with something important. So guess who is gonna be the photographer today." Emily beamed.

"No way!" I gasped , feeling like a teenager.

"Yes. She chose me. I can't believe I'm gonna do the cover shoot. "  Emily squeaked matching my vibe.

"Wow, this is such a huge opportunity. Im sure you're gonna do so great." I reassured her.

"Yes, and I am so excited to meet her. Heard, she's really sweet!"

" Oh, do you mean the celebrity who's gonna be on the cover. Miranda didn't tell me who it's gonna be." I explained. Emily opened her mouth to answer my question, but she got cut off by a girl with a clipboard.

" Emily, she's here we can start." The girl said before disappearing again.

Emily nooded, grabbing her camera.

And then the celebrity stepped into frame in front of the white background, which had been set up for the shoot.

My mouth fell open. Of course it was fucking her.

Billie.

Some who she always found a way to sneak back into my life even if it wasn't intentional.

She had been no contact for a week and now she was basically standing infront of me.

Out of reflex I stepped back , trying to disappear in the shadows of the studio.

I had to remind myself that this was professional. Billie was a celebrity and I was a no one taking notes in the corner.

So that's what I did. I stepped back and did what I was supposed to do. Billie didn't seemed to have noticed me . Billie was already dressed and had her hair and makeup down and was ready to go.

She looked absolutely amazing. Emily was lucky to be the one who got to take pictures of Billie looking like this.

I took some notes on how to set up the lights and how different lighting could change the whole scenery. Billie posed like a natural, feeling comfortable in what she was doing.  She had some out fit changes in between but remained effortlessly good looking.

I was taking notes on different poses Emily proposed to Billie when Emily called me over when the makeup artist fixated up Billies makeup.

" Valerie come here I want to show you some settings I'm using on my camera. "

I nooded and made my way over to her.

Billies eyes flicker up at the mentioning of my name, while the makeup artist tapped powder onto her face with a brush.

"Valerie?" Billie called confused. I gave her and akward wave before turning my attention to Emily's camera.

"You two know each other?" Emily asked looking between Billie and I .

"Yes""Kinda"Billie and I said at the same time. She was obviously the one who said yes , so I added " it's complicated " before asking Emily something about her camera to distract her.

Which luckily worked.

Because she fell deep into conversation with me about settings before the makeup artist finished her job.

I returned to my quiet corner, watching from afar. But I catched Billie glance in my direction multiple times.

Why would she confess her feelings one night and gost me the next.

And now she was here right in front of me.

The shoot went on for the rest of the afternoon until Emily declared that she had all the shots she wanted. It was a wrap. The whole studio gave around of applause dedicated to Emily and Billie, obviously.

I was about to pack up my things and text Chris so that he could pick me up when someone called my name again.

"Valerie. " Billie called jogging over to me.

"Hi."

"Hi."

Well, this was akward.

"How have you been?" Billie asked, desperate to start a conversation. ButI didn't want to have a conversation with her.

"Why are you doing this?" I dead panted. Billie looked irritated. "What do you mean. I'm just asking how you've been."

I raised an eyebrow.

" Billie, I can't keep doing this. You tell me one night that you're fucking in love me and then you dont text me the next , even though I told you I wanted to talk." I said rubbing my temple.

"Wait what hold up." Billie stuttered, a wrinkle forming between her eyebrows.

"You're the one who sneaked off without a word. I thought you needed space. Or that I ruined it . I thought you didn't want me to text you so I didn't. " She explained, fully ignoring the person calling her name. Her bodyguard wanted her attention but she didn't spear it.

"I left a note . You didn't see it?" I asked suddenly feeling stupid. " No i didn't  I swear. Where did you put it?"

"The coffee table, next to where shark was sleeping on the couch." I said as Billie waved her bodyguard off.

Her head snapped back to me.

"Wait , did you write it on a blue post it note?" She was being odly specific.

"Uhm yes.."

Billie groaned. "Shark ate it. He threw up that night- blue post it. But I wasn't sure where he got that from. Such an idiot dog."

I couldn't keep myself from laughing. I fully lost it my head, wiping backward. Billie couldn't keep herself from laughing as well .

" He really eats anything ." Billie laughted.

"Maybe that's a sign you're not feeding him enough." I chuckled.

"Oh dont worry, he's getting more than he's supposed to . He's fine, just dramatic. " Billie laughted. I nooded understandingly.

"But what did your note say? I want to know."

"I had things to do. I was working on my portfolio, but I said I wanted to talk. About that night. I felt some things were still unsaid. " I said, loading up my bag.

Billie nooded." I think you're right. I kinda just dropped my feelings onto you . That wasn't really fair. How about we meet up some time next week and we can talk." She suggested.

"Yeah, that sounds good. I'll text you ok."

"Can I take you home, or do you still have to stay because I can wait for you." Billie rambled. It was cute that she always wanted to drive me.

"I was gonna ask Chris to pick me up, but if you dont mind-" I couldn't even finish my sentence. " I dont." Billie quickly cut in.

I nooded. I told Billie that I was gonna quickly say bye to Emily before we could leave.

"Ok, I'll wait at the car." Billie said before turning on her heals and walking off. Her chunky shoes looked hilarious on her tiny legs.

Billie once again leaned against her car, waiting for me before opening the door for me.

"You know Im pretty capable of opening the door myself. " I chuckled, climbing inside.

"I know." She simply smiled before rounding the car.

On the drive, Billie let me play my music while she told me about her week and apologized again that Shark had eaten my note. The thought made me giggle once again. Billies gace landed on me for a second , a smile creeping up her lips before she bit her lower lip.

"What?" I asked, still laughing a little.

"Nothing, I just like hearing you laugh. It's cute." She teased.

"Shut up." I playfully rolled my eyes.

Unfortunately, the drive wasn't long enough to continue our conversation because Billie had already pulled up into the garage.

"Thanks for driving me home again."

"Of course ,always. " Billie said her smile, sweet.

"Bye B." I called stepping out of her porsche.

"Bye, Val."

I smiled , closing the door. Billie waited before I was safely in the elevator before driving off.

Once I reached my apartment, my phone pinged.

___BillieIm free all next week so tell me when's best for you to meet.

ValerieWill doI hope you're already home and not texting while driving

Billie What?!I would never do such a thing.

Valerie Billie, get off you're phone I dont want to be responsible for your death. I think your fans would kill me.

BillieOk, mum!

Valerie Idiot

Billie:(

Valerie Billie ! I mean it!

___Luckily, she didn't respond to my last text. Well, I hope that means she got off her phone and not that she crashed .

Luckily, my phone vibrated a few minutes later again.___BillieMade it home safeDidn't crash

Valerie Ok goodKind had me worrying

BillieAww

Valerie Shut up. Anyway, I checked my calendar, and Wednesday would work best for me.

BillieGreat, I'll pick you up. Already have some place in mind

Valerie Okii___I was kinda nervous about Wednesday because, until then, I needed to figure out what I wanted.

A.NWas binge reading  'Taming 7', so kinda been a second. It's late and I am really tired but I really wanted to finish it tonight. Hope you enjoyed and sorry for all of these time skips. I was kinda lazy.