Chapter 31

Rhys pov.:

A couple hours later, after I met with Cassian and Az about the battle and safely moved all my citizens back into their house, I winnowed into Amren's place. Feyre didn't think she was important enough to stay. To fight with us. How could I blame her for saving us, for saving my people? But she was gone and putting a smile on my face while I barked orders and shook hands took all of my 500 years of patience and stillness to pretend like I was ok, that I was fine. But I wasn't. Having Feyre sacrifice herself to the Spring court was one thing, and I had been a mess then. My family had been a mess then. But this was different, and I could see it now. The stillness and emptiness which laid behind Cassian's eyes. The shadows which circled Az more and more as the hours passed. The utter quietness radiating off of Mor was most likely the most heartbreaking. But I got through it if only because I held onto that thin line between us, the fragile mating bond, the tattoo which lays on my arm, promising that she's alive. Alive. Alive. That's what I kept repeating to myself. Alive.

Amren still sat where I last saw her, sitting on her kitchen bench with the orb in front of her. She hadn't moved, as if she'd been totally absorbed by the ball. Her face was pale though, very pale, as if using the orb, commanding it took everything out of her. "Rhysand" she finally spoke after 10 minutes of me sitting on her coach, head between my hands. "I need you to get me something". Then silence. I gritted my teeth. "Could you be a little more specific Amren?" but I could feel it then, the bond becoming thinner. I glanced to my arm to see the tattoo paler than it had been before. She was dying. I was dying. I couldn't lose her; I can't leave G here alone. This cannot be how it ends. I refused. I went to stand up but found it took me a minute to find the strength. My limbs were heavy, and I realized that she was drawing off my strength to fight for herself. Good. If that's what she needed, then I would find a way to give her my strength. I'd give it all if it didn't mean that she would be gone too.

"I have a theory" she said. "I tried it and this thing - "she flicked the orb for emphasis, and I could have sworn a dark energy pulsed from it. I would have flinched if I had enough energy. Even now I leaned a little too heavily on the kitchen table; I haven't felt like this since the cauldron. I doubted any of the others noticed, they were probably too tired; good there's nothing they can do anyways, it would only worry them. "I'm closer to pinpointing their location. It doesn't help that it doesn't know either, it has a feeling it says, that's it hears us, not this world but close, and cloaked in pure stripped darkness." I think I got where she was going and even the thought of using energy for magic made my knees wobble. I casually sat down on the kitchen chair.

"Would you like me to summon something from the pocket?" I furrowed my brows. "Nothing can survive there Amren, it has no air." "It doesn't hurt to try Rhys". She was right, at least it was minimal magic that didn't take to much energy. I pulled one of the first things from the pocket and was met with some spare clothes I always kept for Feyre for emergencies. I frowned at the clothes in my hand, tears rising to my eyes as her sent hit me. I meant to put more power in my voice, to sound like the High Lord of the Night court, but my voice came out low, almost a whisper. "Did the creature tell you anything?" she shook her head, still watching the orb and thankfully not noticing the pounding headache. "Try winnowing across the room, that's a different black pocket". I wanted to groan, but for Feyre I would do it. I needed to stay strong for her. I was the strongest High Lord in history for cauldron sake's I could give Feyre my energy and winnow across the room.

I was about to rally my strength when Mor walked in through the door with Cassian and Az in tow. I apologized to her earlier and she said she understood. She helped me with all the organizing and as she strode in now, she took one glance at me and narrowed her eyes. "What is wrong with you? You look worse than all of us combined." And feel like it I almost mentioned; but I blew out a breath as indeed they all stared at me, including Amren who took one sniff and narrowed her eyes. I tried to sit up straighter and put a smile on my face, but I knew they could see it, I've lived with them for 500 years. I settled for the truth instead. I pulled up my black sleeve and revealed to them the fading tattoo, "We're dying" I said, to their shocked faces, "that's why I have been pushing everyone to hurry up. Not just for my selfish needs to get her back but- but because she's dying, wherever she was, and because of our promise to each other, I'm dying." I looked to the floor, I didn't want to see their faces; but Mor dropped to the floor and placed a hand over mine, eyes roaming over my face which no doubt was pale and sunken in. I could feel it, the slow drain of my energy.

Mor's jaw tightened and she rose. "What do you need me to do?" she asked Amren, Cassian and Az echoing the same thing, their eye still on me, waiting for me too look at them. "Can someone get Gawain. I need to see him again, if things don't go well- "But Cassian's and Azriel's snarls cut me off. "Do not start down that road Rhys. Cauldron boil me Rhys, but I am not letting you die on me. You are not leaving your son. Don't give him the same childhood as us. Without parents. Always weighted with the burden of that power, both his and the power you and Feyre will transfer to him if you die." I had only so rarely seen this type of rage come from Cassian, but I didn't flinch, I didn't even blink as I stared him down, but I let him continue. "Don't do that to us. We will find her Rhys, but you both need to hang in there, if not for our sake, then for G." his words sunk in and as if I wished it, G comes through the doors, held by Elain and Nesta in tow. I smiled, genuinely smiled and reached for him. I held him in my arms as he wrapped his tiny hands around my neck and gave me a hug. My new favorite thing he learned recently.

"Mama Mama" he began. A couple weeks ago he began to mumble and after repeating word after word to him, he had said mama first. Mama's boy he was. The rest of the family it seemed had placed bets. Az, Nesta and Amren it seems lost after they though he would say Dada. Feyre was beyond ecstatic but it wasn't soon after that he learned Dada. Along with banana, fruit, and toy.

My heart broke at the words, tears rising to my eyes, to hell with anyone who saw. "Mama's coming G" and I kissed him on the cheek. But he began crying and I did the only thing that would calm him down. I opened my hand and let a little ball of night radiate, staying above my palm. He giggled and ran his tiny hands through the small ball, as much as I could muster right now. I glanced up to find my family them looking at G, tears in their own eyes, Even Cassian and Az. Even Nesta who never showed emotion, and while Amren was the only one who didn't, she was as close to tears as I had ever seen from her. Changed indeed. They all nodded at me, the hidden meaning behind it, I knew that whatever happened to me they would take care of G, they would raise him as their own, loved. Not like how we were raised, not at all. And a part of me inside relaxed, felt ok to let him go if I needed to.

I was about to open my mouth to Amren, to ask what else the orb told her when G spoke again. "Mama" he giggled, still looking at the ball of night in my hand, getting dimmer by the second, my energy levels reaching the bottom. I studied him under furrowed brows. He began to giggle more, and his hands waved through the inky night image more. "Mama Mama". "Shit- "Cassian breathed. I shot him a look and he grimaced. "Amren" I began but she replied faster than I could continue. "I'm already on it".

There's was nothing we could do. Nothing as we watched Amren with her orb, with the creature inside it. Nothing anyone could do when the ball of night in my hand finally flickered out. The magic inside me completely drained. Panic began to grow in the pit of my stomach. I wanted to barf. There wasn't much of me left. And my family new it. Amren new it. Her hands worked quicker as she turned pages of the book and wrote things down in an unknown language. Mor took G from me as if she knew I could barely hold him anymore, I could barely hold myself on this stool. Gawain began crying hysterically. "Mama Mama" he cried. But there was nothing we could do. Az's shadows didn't even help. Mor rocked him but to no use. And there it was, his wings again. And......and. I couldn't believe my eyes. I blinked again to see if it was a trick of my eyes but no, it was inky black radiating off of him, pooling at his feet. I stumbled out of the chair and there, I could see inside the night, deep behind the stars, I would have missed her if it wasn't for the pull between us as strong as it had been since she disappeared. But there was no mistaking her, it was Feyre.

I wanted to pull her out, but I had no magic left, none. I was barely holding on as it was. I had no control over my night powers. Feyre and G are the only other two people on this world that have those powers. Both were not able to use it. G was still crying in Mors arms, the pool of darkness skittering over our feet. "Keep him crying" I said to Mor. And feeling more like myself than I had in hours I turned to Amren. "I can't get her out, my magic is gone. How do we get her out?" Hope, it was blind hope fueling me. Amren's eyes shimmered as she thought, and her jaw tightened. "Mor I'll need your help." Mor gave a still crying G to Az and came over to where we stood. Amren quickly explained what she needed Mor to do and I grounded my teeth. I didn't let myself see Mor's tremble. This was not magic of this world. But I didn't care at this point. As long as it got Feyre back to me.

Amren and Mor stood side by side in front of Az, in front of G, who kept radiating the night from his body. They muttered some word and a dark light radiate from their outstretched hands, into the night. And slowly, so slowly I saw her coming closer. But the girls steadied their feet, as if they were being pulled away, as if something was pulling them. Sweat ran down both their temples as Feyre was still being pulled in. I had never felt so helpless. Even under the mountain, even then Cauldron be damned I at least had some control, as little as it was. But I know, I could do nothing but watch as my Mates life rested in the hands of my second and third. My wife, My High lady, My equal in every way. She came closer but I knew that Amren and Mors energy was draining and draining fast. I could make out the shape of her body, the way she floated through the night, arms, legs and head limp by her side. Her eyes were closed, she was so close I wanted to reach in and grab her. "Amren I can't hold on much longer" Mor said between heavy breathes. I clenched my jaw; I couldn't stand around doing nothing. I willed any power left in my body, anything that would allow me to use my powers to reach in and grab her. There, a small kernel that I could gather, enough to turn my hand into smoky night. I reached forward, into the pool but she was still too far, just out of my reach. "I need her closer" I grounded out. Tears were running down Mor's face, her dark stream becoming wobbly. Her knees buckled but Cassian caught her, held her. Feyre still was on her slow accent.

We weren't going to make it. She's going to come so close to only lose her, forever, and I would have failed her. Nesta, Nesta for cauldrons sake came out of the corner of Amren's apartment and stood next to Amren, face in tears. "How can I help; I can't do what your doing- ""put your hand on my arm and give me your energy." Amren replied in a short-clipped sentence. She was feeling it, the burn out slowly approaching. It was in her eyes, the dimness of her skin. Elain came over too and placed her hand on Mor. The ladies of the night court, standing as one to save their High lady. I'd have to remember this scene. I knew Feyre would want to paint it. Because she would get out, she will get out and get to paint and thousand paintings, more if she wanted. The dark power became stronger and there she was, Feyre was in my reach just a couple more inches. There, my hand wrapped around cloth and I pulled. I pulled her towards me, towards life, until she came out of the inky night and fell into my hands. Feyre, my mate. She was alive, breathing in my arms. Mor fainted and the rest of the girls seemed like they weren't too far behind as they leaned over and rested their arms on their knees, panting hard.

Gawain began to slowly stop crying as he saw Feyre, the night reeling back into him. That would be a discussion for another time. But I couldn't believe that she was in my arms. My family gathered around us but held a respectable distance away. I cradled her head in my hands and her body still lay limp across my lap. I called down the bond for her.

Wake up Feyre

I found you I finally found you

If you don't wake up, I'll have the vanilla tarts you love so much bad banned from Velaris

And there, her eyes fluttered open, so slowly and she muttered "Prick" but I didn't care, not as she was here, speaking, conscious. I laughed and kissed her lips. She grabbed my face with her hand and kissed me back with heartbreaking gentleness. "I'm tired" she muttered into my chest and began to close her eyes. I stood up, Feyre still in my arms. I looked up to my family, and Az muttered "go", so I did, into our room. I laid her down into the bed and wrapped myself around her as she fell into sleep. I was exhausted too I realized. They could take care of Gawain for a while. I couldn't even fight my eyes as they closed. I only wrapped my arms around her tighter and covered us with a wing before I fell into deep sleep.

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I cried the whole time writing this. I hope you guys love it as much as I did.

Every time you guys leave a comment it it makes my day so thank you so much.

xoxo

-S