Ten

All of our little demonstrations of affect that night and on the following days didn't go unnoticed by Brooke, who made sure to try to talk some sense into me as soon as we got some time alone. After my birthday, Sam and I had become a little more touchy than usual, with random kisses on the cheek and lingering hands here and there, but I tried reassuring my friend that it was completely platonic as we both understood things couldn't go any further.

Which was complete bullshit.

From my birthday's night onwards, I had realised that my crave for Sam wasn't just completely physical as I had thought so. I started to pay attention to all the little details, his attentiveness and chivalry whenever it came to me, without losing the all the teasing manners and jokes that drove me crazy. And I then understood that I really wanted him, not just for his good looks and body, which was perfect to my eyes. I wanted something more. Something that I couldn't have but was still at the tip of my fingers, tempting me 24/7. I really didn't know what was going on in Sam's head, but I could tell he was having a little bit of a struggle too, as his eyes showed me both desire and frustration every time they met mine, while his hands didn't hesitate to graze over my skin whenever they could. The sexual tension was palpable a hundred miles away from us, and I knew Brooke hadn't bought any of the shit I had been telling to reassure her, but I still couldn't bring myself to confront the situation. I knew that if I dared to finally bring it up and try to talk with Sam about it, the prospects wouldn't favour my wishes even if he felt the same way.

That Friday, Danny had the brilliant idea of going to the movies all together. It had been a pretty lame day for taking into consideration we were college students. We were all hanging out in our apartment, as always, doing the uttermost nothing instead of going out or doing something fun. We were just laying down in the living room with some shitty show on the TV none of us was actually paying attention to. Danny, Brooke and I were all squished on the couch while Sam was sitting on a pile of cushions on the floor to the side of the coffee table; the four of us never fitted into our beloved piece of furniture altogether. He wasn't even sitting close to me, but I couldn't ignore his presence, as his eyes were fixed on my face ever since we had sat down. Even though there was no way on Earth to hide it and both Danny and Brooke knew what was going on, we had never been too blatantly obvious about our attraction when they were around. All our little subtle moments always took place mostly when we were alone, as we knew that even if in reality they were just trying to protect us and would always support us, our best friends didn't exactly approve of us getting sexually involved again if we pretended to keep on living together. But given the fact that Brooke was literally napping and Danny was too focused on texting Mackenzie to my side, Sam's eyes couldn't prevent staring at me in silence, biting his lip in thought every now and then with a look I couldn't decipher, analysing every single one of my features while unintendedly sending chills all over my body. He had never stared at me like that before, as all of our teasing consisted of being a bit touchier but never doing anything too direct that would clearly demonstrate that we were indeed carving for the other. So, his piercing eyes easily made me nervous, not knowing what the meaning behind of them was.

When Daniel gave up on texting his girlfriend and suddenly suggested we did something about our shitty afternoon, I quickly agreed, feeling kind of bored and not being able to deal with Sam's stare anymore without jumping and kissing his plump lips passionately. Danny was pretty excited for this new movie that had come out the previous week and he still hadn't watched, so after checking showtimes on his phone and finding it was being shown in half an hour, he decided we would definitely go to the movies. At first Brooke opposed to the idea, waking up to the sudden conversation and claiming she was pretty tired, but eventually agreed as we were all going and she didn't feel like dragging herself back to her apartment and dealing with her "noisy" sister yet.

Danny drove us all four to the movies in just a couple of minutes. As soon as we got there Brooke and I headed to buy some popcorn and sweets while him and Sam got us the tickets. Everything was fine until we had to take seats inside the theatre. Brooke was the first to walk down the only row with empty seats left, willing to crash into one as soon as possible. I sat down next to her, relaxing into the chair but tensing up immediately once I realised Sam had taken the spot right next to me. After all the staring he had done throughout the day without even touching, my nerves were alert and still tingling by his mere presence. The movie started, and not even 10 minutes into it, Brooke fell asleep curled up into the seat. The film wasn't bad at all, but all I could seem to focus on was every single movement the boy to my side made. I couldn't take him out of my head, not with the scent of his cologne filling my nostrils and the look he had been giving me earlier. I took ahold of myself for the first half of the movie, hopelessly trying to concentrate on the movie, until he leaned down to place the empty bag of popcorn on the floor, "accidentally" brushing my leg with his hand in the process. I couldn't take it anymore.

Checking on Danny first, who seemed too consumed by the current scene on the screen to even acknowledge what was going on around him, I decided to casually rest my head on Sam's shoulder. I waited, expecting some sort of reaction from him, but I got nothing. Not even one of his fingers resting on his lap moved, and I didn't know if I should go further or not. Yes, he had been intently looking at me all day, but I didn't want to fuck it up. Plus, in spite of our ultimate handsy manners, everything was always subtle and downed to "unintentional" touches and random moments. Whenever we had hugged or cuddled it had been under friendly conditions, never looking for something more. I decided to nuzzle my head a little bit further, my nose brushing his warm neck, but as I got no response after some minutes, I lightly placed my hand on his thigh. All of his muscles tensed up instantly, and I smiled to myself knowing I had caused such reaction with just a simple touch, so I started to absentmindedly rub my thumb against his jean in circles. But that smile was quickly removed from my face when he forcefully grabbed my hand with his and harshly swatted it away from his leg, adjusting on his spot so that I lifted my head from his shoulder too.

- What the hell is wrong with you? – he snapped in a whisper, looking at me with a bewildered face.

I looked at him confused, but he had already gone back to staring at the screen with a frown, a hint of anger and annoyance falling from his eyes which avoided meeting mine at all costs. I started to blush, feeling like the most stupid and pathetic person on Earth. Of course, I had misread all of his signs. The constant staring, his lingering hands on my body, his lips slowly grazing the skin of my cheeks anytime he kissed them, they had only been a teasing game for him. How had I been so dumb? We had both agreed that nothing could happen between us after we had fucked, but yet there I was trying to ignore that. Obviously, I had misunderstood all of his "friendly" caring actions and gentleness for something more, when he was just messing around. It hurt to know that the guy I had started catching feelings for felt like this was all a pastime.

But then I started to feel angry. He was touching and teasing all week too, why would he get mad all of a sudden when I did the same? Was he waiting for me to make a fool of myself? Making me crave for him but then giving me the cold shoulder as if it were a silly teasing game? He had no right to get annoyed in the slightest. I would had never done anything if he hadn't dropped the hint for me to do so. And I hadn't done anything that crossed the line, my head on his shoulder and my hand on his thigh were far from being something way over the edge for a touchy guy like him. I felt angry and disappointed, not only because I had been blatantly rejected, but because I had never imagined he would end up acting like a jerk like this. Fuming, I crossed my arms over my chest and waited for the movie to end, my mind going a thousand miles per hour as these new feelings boiled inside my veins. When the credits started to roll, I quickly shoot up from my seat and headed towards the restrooms, ignoring the confused look on Danny's face.

Five minutes later I stepped into the hallway, where the trio was already waiting for me next to the door. Giving a tiny smile to Brooke and Daniel but ignoring Sam, I started to walk towards the exit, with them following on cue. The drive back to campus was rather silent, as Brooke fell asleep once again and Danny focused on the road. He dropped us off and waved goodbye before heading to his own building's parking lot, leaving my sleepy friend and the ass I had as a roommate on the sidewalk. Disregarding Sam once again, I grabbed Brooke's arm and dragged her zombie-like body into the building, hurriedly going up the stairs. I hesitated when we reached my floor, not knowing if I should go another flight of stairs up and stay at her apartment so that I could avoid the long-haired boy for the rest of the day or not.

- Why are you in such a rush? – she asked sleepily and confused once we came to a stop - You are not coming over, I want to sleep and you know you'll keep me up – she stated right away, being able to read my mind with just a look to my face. I groaned and let go of her arm, giving up on the idea and watching her climb the stairs to her own floor after waving goodbye.

Just as I turned around, Sam showed up, staring at me with a look that yet again I couldn't understand. I tried to quickly shove past him and reach for our apartment's door, but he grabbed my wrist and made me turn on my spot.

- What are you doing? Let go – I sanapped, avoiding his piercing eyes. I struggled to get out from his tight grip on my arm but failed miserably – Sam, let go of my arm.

- Why are you mad? – he asked calmly, his eyes searching for mine.

- Why am I mad? I could ask the same – I scoffed, still fighting to release my wrist from his fingers. Even though I tried, I realised he wouldn't let go, so I gave up and finally looked up at him with a sigh – I don't want to talk anymore, can you just let me go?

- Why are you mad? – he repeated again as he took a step closer, making me roll my eyes.

- You know exactly why I am mad, so what, do you want me to say it out loud so that I make a bigger fool of myself? – I spat, getting angrier every second. He took another step forward so I took one back, trying to get away from him but my back ended hitting the wall behind me – Stop it.

- Tell me why you are mad and I'll stop – his face was mere inches away from mine and I could feel his breathe fanning my cheeks. I wasn't used to this stern and demanding Sam, so it was all a bit of a shock to me. I didn't say a word though, I wouldn't embarrass myself more than I had already done and I would definitely not tell him what he wanted to hear – Gwen, tell me – he went on, his voice deeper. As much as I hated to admit it, his closeness and the tone of his voice elicited goosebumps all over my skin. All I could bring myself to do was shaking my head no, biting my lip in the process as it appeared that words couldn't come out of my mouth. His hands found my waist, and he inched closer to whisper in my ear – Are you mad because I didn't do this? – his hands slowly slid down from my waist to my thighs, bringing them up as he caressed my legs only to slide them down again, keeping the pattern. I gulped as he continued to do this, thankful that the sides of our heads were pressed together. His nose was still lingering near my ear, so in that position he couldn't see the deep blush that had taken over my cheeks as I started to get turned on. –Or because I didn't do this either? – he brought his mouth down to my neck, his lips starting to leave a trail of feather like kisses on my soft skin at the beginning, which ended up getting deeper and wetter. I shut my eyes, tilting my head back unconsciously to allow him more space while his hands kept on feeling my body.

- Sam – I couldn't prevent but moan when his lips sucked on a sweet spot below my ear. I hated to give in, but the power his body had over mine was stronger than my willingness to stay mad at him – Sam, stop – I said again, gaining back some control over myself – You can't just treat me like shit and expect me to fall for this game of yours afterwards – I added sternly, trying to push his body off mine as anger took over me. Instead of letting me go, he tightened his grip and moved his face from my neck to place his forehead against mine, our breathes mixing as we both panted.

- And you can't just touch me like that in front of our friends when it triggers every cell in my body to grab you and kiss the hell out of you; not when I can't do anything about it – he groaned referring to what had happened earlier, his face leaning even closer to mine so that the distance between our lips was almost non-existent. I was confused. He was mad just because I had done it in front of Danny and Brooke? – You have no idea of what you do to me, Gwenny – he whispered, looking down at my lips for a second before sweetly capturing them with his own in a passionate kiss.

I offered no opposition, kissing him back instantly but he pulled away after a couple of seconds, searching for my eyes with a little bit of uncertainty in his's as he tried to see if I was okay with it. To hell with everything. As an answer, I grabbed both sides of his head and pulled him closer to me, kissing him eagerly. My hands quickly reached up and my fingers tangled in his hair as soon as he shoved his tongue into my mouth. I could feel the butterflies dancing in my stomach at the feeling of his soft, velvety lips against mine. Kissing someone had never felt as right as kissing him, even if it couldn't be more wrong. He pushed me harder against the wall, with one of his knees between my legs while we continued devouring each other. We didn't care about being in the building's hallway, where everybody, including the security cameras, could see us. Whenever we allowed ourselves to give in into the other, everything around us never mattered, it was always just me and him. His hands allowed themselves to roam all over my torso, making me arch my back to lean into his touch.

- Fuck – he mumbled, looking into my eyes with lust when he pulled away to catch some air, but quickly dived into the crook of my neck to suck and bite on the skin there, his hands squeezing my ass gently. Our bodies were completely pressed against each other, and I couldn't prevent tiny soft moans from escaping my lips as his mouth explored every inch of my neck, making me pull on his hair. He moaned and groaned lowly in response, quickly reaching for the back pocket of his jeans. He was looking for our apartment's keys as things were getting more heated. His lips locked back with mine but never pulled away while he fumbled with the doorknob, finally opening the door and pushing us both in. Without even breaking the kiss he pinned me against the wall, his hands grabbing the back of my thighs so that I wrapped my legs around his body as I grabbed his hair in fistfuls, our tongues massaging each other forcefully.

- Oh my god – a female voice laughed from behind us, making us jump apart instantly. In the middle of our living room stood two girls, the one that spoke with long brown hair and a smirk plastered on her face, trying to hold in her laughter. The other had her blonde hair up in a ponytail, with a rather embarrassed look. My eyes were wide open in shock, not understanding what those girls were doing inside our apartment and how the hell they had got in – That's a hell of an entrance, little bro – and then it hit me. Ronnie. This girl had to be Veronica, his sister. The resemblance wasn't too obvious, but there was still a little something in her face that definitely gave it away if you paid attention. Blushing like crazy and not knowing where to hide myself, I looked over at Sam, who was still catching his breath as well and was staring at his sister and the other girl with a confused face.

- Ron, what the heck are you doing here? – he asked in a rather hoarse voice, clearing his throat right away. Wasn't she supposed to be in Chicago?

- I've been texting you all afternoon, silly, you wouldn't reply – she rolled her eyes, still leaning against the back of the couch.

- We were at the movies, dumbass, I wasn't checking my phone. Why are you here? – Sam asked, rather annoyed but mostly confused like me. He took a step forward, somewhat hiding me in a protective way from the girl's view.

- We were going to drive around downtown today, and as soon as mom heard she told me to bring you this – she grabbed a sweater that was laying over the coffee table and threw it to Sam, who caught it in the air – You forgot it when you stayed home for dinner yesterday. As I would be in the area, she suggested I brought it. Plus, I wouldn't have missed a chance to take a look at your new apartment – she went on, her eyes diverting to the plants and paintings around her. So apparently, she had got back from Chicago someday that week – But you gave me monumental show anyways, so I'm not complaining at all – she concluded chuckling. She then turned to me, as if she had suddenly realised I was still standing there, red as a tomato – Oh my god, I'm sorry I never introduced myself, I'm Ronnie, this idiot's sister – she smiled, walking over to me and giving me a small hug as if the awkwardness from before was non-existent – And that's Carmen, um, my friend – she smiled again, but this time she was eyeing Sam nervously. Said girl just waved at me, but I could tell she was feeling uncomfortable.

- I'm Gwen – I smiled back, apparently recovering my voice.

- Gwen? As in his roommate? – she asked with an enthusiasm I couldn't understand on her voice as she pointed at Sam. I simply nodded – Sam! – she smacked his arm – You never told us you were dating her! – He groaned, rubbing his face with his palms.

- We are not going out, Ron - he sighed exasperatedly as he dropped his hands down. I looked down at my feet, playing with them nervously while I wished the floor would swallow me right then and there.

- Oh, I just thought... – she trailed off looking at the both of us with a frown.

- It's complicated – Sam said, indicating the topic was over – How the hell did you get in?

- You are pretty basic Sam, I knew you would have hidden a key somewhere near the door in case you forgot yours – I glared at Sam, as I wasn't aware of that "secret" key. He just looked at me, his eyes saying "sorry" as he bit down on his lip.

- Why did you stay though? You could have just dropped the sweater and leave – he went on, looking at his sister before making his way towards the kitchen and grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. He took a swig as he walked back to where we were standing, handing out the bottle for me to drink which I accepted thankfully.

- Can't I simply want to spend some quality time with my dear brother? – she teased.

- Ron, we had dinner and spent the whole afternoon together yesterday. I'm pretty sure you have more people to catch up with after being away for so long – Ronnie rolled her eyes but put a defeated face on as she couldn't come up with any more excuses, taking a deep breath before speaking.

- Well, while we were driving around, we might have been invited to a certain party ten minutes from here – she started – A super fun party, I must add. And well, as you know, we would have a forty five-minute drive back home which would suck, not just because I wouldn't be able to drink but because it's sooo far and it would be sooo late. Carm would have to drive for over an hour in the dark to get back to her place, actually. – she explained, trying to sound convincing - We were going to turn down the invitation, but then I remembered that a certain very handsome silly boy whom I love so much and is my favourite brother lived just a couple minutes away from the party – she put on her best puppy dog eyes before going on – And, I was just wondering if you would let us crash here for tonight? – she said that last part hurriedly, puckering her lower lip.

- Ron... - Sam started – Why can't you just drive back home? Or go to a party near there?

- Because we were invited to this one – she whined – And everybody back in Muth is here in campus so they'll all be there. It's just for tonight, Sammy, I promise you won't even notice we were here.

- We don't have much space and I don't want to bother Gwen with all of this...

- It's okay for me – I interrupted him without even thinking. Yeah, we didn't have much space, but it was his sister we were talking about. I wanted to believe Sam would have no problem with letting Carter crash here if he ever needed to – We don't have extra mattresses but we have the couch and we can figure out something from there – I shrugged.

- See? I already like her – Ronnie smiled at me, taking it as half a victory – C'mon Sammy – she insisted once more. Sam looked over at Carmen, who had moved from the middle of the room sometime during the conversation to sit down on the couch, looking nervous. There was certainly something weird between them. He then glared back at Ronnie, and they stared at each other, having a secret conversation with their eyes which I clearly couldn't understand.

- Okay – Sam sighed, finally giving in – You two can take my bed, it's not big enough but it'll have to do. I'll take the couch.

- Yes, you are the best! – Ronnie exclaimed, jumping from her spot and hugging him right away – Thank you, you too Gwen – she said while letting go – Well, we'll go tshopping for some clothes for tonight, we'll be back before it gets too dark. See you in a while – she finished smiling. She looked back at Carmen who stood up from the couch and headed towards the door. They both waved before exiting the apartment, leaving both Sam and me alone again.

- Um, I'm sorry about that – he said, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

- It's okay, she seems to be pretty nice. And I'm sure her friend is too – I said. He put a somewhat stern face when I said that last part but I ignored it – And she's your sister anyways, so there's no problem with her staying here.

- Yeah, well, thanks for being so cool about it – he shyly smiled, before looking down at his feet. He started walking towards the hallway to go to his room right away, but he suddenly stopped and turned to look at me – Gwen? – he asked with a little bit of doubt in his voice.

- Yeah? – I answered expectantly. We stayed staring at each other's eyes for what felt like hours, when they actually were mere seconds. I was waiting for him to say something about what had happened before we were interrupted by Ronnie. I couldn't take the whole situation anymore, in which we would touch and kiss the other but then push it away as if nothing had happened. A million thoughts seemed to be passing through his mind as he hesitated before finally speaking.

- Um, we can cook together later if you want to – he said breaking the stare and looking around the living room, the words that came out of his mind clearly not being the ones he deep down had planned to say.

- Sure – I replied, a little disappointed, before walking down to my room, my shoulder brushing his bony one as I walked past him.