Chapter 25 - Hounded

I come in and out of consciousness every few hours and I wonder how long I've been in the closet. I'm Completely weak, haven't having a drink and food for God knows how long. I can't move a muscle and I can feel myself dying. Everything hurts, not just physically but emotionally.

I haven't been able to stop thinking about what happened to T. The way he sacrificed himself to save me and the group. The thought of not even having the chance to say thank you for what he did breaks my heart and I know that it is a guilt I'm going to hold over me for the rest of my life. No matter how short it is. We weren't exactly the closest of people but we still had a good friendship. He did a lot for me, more than I could ever have asked for.

The way he sacrificed himself to bring Merle back from the rooftop in Atlanta for me. The way he took care of us all on the farm and on the road. The way he helped us begin to fix up the prison, to fight for those prisoners. He was an incredible man that didn't deserve to go the way he went, it should have been me and I will always hold a special place for him in my heart.

During the small brief periods where I don't think about T-Dog, I think about Daryl. I wonder what he must be thinking, what he must be feeling right now. He is the only thing keeping my alive right now, knowing that I need to get back to him. Somehow, someway. I made him a promise, always. I intend to keep that promise. I just have to conjure up the energy to get out of here and go back to him, even if it is only to say goodbye to him.

However I'm too weak and I haven't had the strength to get myself out of this closet. A small nagging part in the back of my brain tells me that I'm going to die here. That I will die and turn and be one of the very things that I hate most in this world. And even though I intend to fight, the reality of that thought coming true comes closer with every minute passing by.

All of a sudden I hear the sound of people talking from down the hallway. I weakly turn towards the door as the sounds of their footsteps comes closer. I reach my arm out and try with all my might to push against the door. It moves, but only slightly. Barely enough for a bit of light to fill the room. However I continue to push at the door, knowing it will be my only chance at a rescue.

"Check it out man. We must have missed it last night." A voice says that sounds like one of the prisoners.

"It's probably just one or two of them. Don't look like they got much fight." I hear him say and my heart rate increases immediately at the sound of his voice.

I go to scream out but my voice is so dry that no noise comes out. There is a push on the door and I feel hope rise in my chest when he speaks again, "They ain't going nowhere, we'll take care of it on the way back."

I push against the door again as I hear him walk away and I scold myself for being so weak, for not being the person he knows I am. I hear him whistle and soon he speaks, this time form further down the hall, "Come on."

He pauses for a moment before he speaks, "You know my Mom, she liked her wine. She liked to smoke in bed. Virginia Slims." He says and a whole bunch of memories come flying back to mind.

"Bree..." He stumbles over my name. He pauses for a moment before continuing to speak, "Bree and I were playing with a bunch of kids in the neighbourhood, we could do that with Merle gone." He states, further down the hall though I hear him clearly and I push against the door again.

"They had bikes, we didn't. We heard sirens getting louder, they jumped on their bikes and we ran after it you know? Hoping we were gonna see something worth seeing." He says and the memory comes back to me like it was yesterday.

"We ran after them but, we couldn't keep up. I went around a corner and saw my friends looking at me. Hell, I saw everybody looking at me. Fire trucks everywhere, people from the neighbourhood. It was my house they were there for, that was my Mom in bed. Burnt down to nothing... That was the hard part. You know, she was just gone. Erased. Nothing left of her." He explains and I push against the door, desperate to get his attention and to stop him from feeling the hurt I know he is feeling.

"It was better that way. I don't know, just made it seem like it wasn't real you know?" He states.

I hear a different voice speak. This one much younger, though his voice holds so much pain, "I shot my Mom. She was out, hadn't turned yet. I ended it, it was real... I'm sorry about your Mom."

"I'm sorry about yours."

I do t really take in what they said as I push again but their footsteps disappear from the hallway and soon I can't hear them at all. I stop pushing against the door and I slump my head back against the wall, a tear sliding down my face as I remember that day perfectly. I spent that whole afternoon with Daryl at my house, neither one of us saying a word. I don't think anyone of us could. I knew how much pain he was in, I knew that his Dad didn't care.

That was when he moved in with us for those few months, the best months of my life if I'm honest. That's when we grew really close, it became a routine having him around. He was always there for me whenever I needed him. Whenever he needed me, that was the beginning of us. Not too long later Merle was out of Juvie and he came to live with us too and that was great. But then their Dad came and wanted them home, back in the house that they were so desperate to get out of.

My father had had enough of them at that point, it putting a dampener on bringing home his latest fluzy. Plus he and their Dad were best friends and looking back in hindsight I could see why. And just like that they were back home, living under the roof that had oppressed them their whole lives. They still came over as much as they could, we spent most of our time wandering the streets and getting into all kinds of trouble.

It was on the afternoon that they went back that Daryl and I made our promise, that no matter we would always be there for each other no matter what. I think that was the moment I really knew I loved him, I couldn't deny it any longer. He was my best friend and the boy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and now thirty thirty three years later here I am, more in love with him than I was back then.

I close my eyes as I think back over the good memories, my body getting weaker and the light fading quicker. I know I'm not going to get out of here now, I just don't have it in me. This is it for me and I think of Daryl's words. Maybe it's a good thing that I don't get to say goodbye, that it will be better for him. He will only have the good memories of us, only the good to remember me by. He won't feel the pain of watching me go, I'll just be gone, like his mother and his brother.

I begin to slip into another sleep and I think of him, knowing that if this is my time to go I want to be thinking about the man I love more than anything on this world.

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I'm startled awake by a noise out in the hallway and I turn my head towards it, my body on it's last legs. The sound is repetitive, the sound of something hitting against something else. I listen to it for a long moment and I wonder if someone could be out there. I decide that there is only one way to find out. Using every last bit of energy I have I reach out and push at the door, the sound of the hitting continuing on from outside.

The door swings back and I push at it again and again and again. The hitting gets louder and louder until I hear some thing drop and suddenly the door is kicked in. I drop my hand down and turn my head away as I hear the jangling of keys and footsteps walking away and heavy breathing. All of sudden something is dragged away from the door and it swings open, suddenly being thrown open.

I turn my head weakly and look over to see him there, my heart giving a thump. Daryl kneels down with a mixed emotional face, his hand reaching forward. He cups my chin and I lean into his touch, closing my eyes in exhaustion. He moves and I feel him arms go underneath my knees and around my back. He lifts me up into his arms, carrying my bridal style. He walks effortlessly down the hallway as I lean my head on his shoulder, happy with the feeling of being in his arms.

I don't really take in my surroundings until I hear the familiar sound of the gate to the cell block being open. He walks me into one of the cells on the lower floor, laying me down on the bed. I open my eyes and see him looking down at me, water pooled in the corners of his eyes. He turns away and rushes out of the cell quickly and I wonder where he is going.

He quickly comes back in with a bottle of water and he places it on the bed before reading down. He pulls me up until I'm sitting in a sitting position with my back against the cell wall. He grabs the water bottle and pulls the cap off, moving closer to me. I open my mouth and he pours some water in, it instantly refreshing in my parched mouth. Some dribbles back out of my mouth but I mostly drink it up as quickly as possible.

When I've drunken the whole thing he puts it back down on the ground and turns to face me. He looks me over as if I'm not really and a weak smile comes over my face. I lean forward and wrap my arms around his neck, holding him tightly against me. He moves his arms around my waist and pulls me tightly against him. I bury my head into his neck, feeling like I'm complete once more. I refuse to let him go and so does he, this being our most agonising time apart.

"I though you were dead." He whispers, his voice thick.

I pull back and look at him, seeing a small tear fall down the side of his face. I weakly reach up and wipe it away before looking into his eyes. I tilt my head to the side and smile at him, "Always."

He looks at me for a long moment before giving me a small nod, "Always." He whispers back.

He slowly leans forward and places a kiss on my lips and my eyelids flutter shut. One of my hands rest on his neck, the other still cupping his cheek as his lips move with mine. This kiss is different to our others, there being more passion and love than before. My heart swells at the action and I know that he loves me and he missed me when I was gone.

I pull back and open my eyes, mine meeting his and I can't help the smile that comes over my face. I blink tiredly and he shuffles back so that his back is against the cell wall. He reaches forward and gently pulls me against him so that I'm pressed against his side, my head resting on his collarbone. My right hand rests against his chest, the other in between us on the bed. One of his arms is around my back with his hand resting my hip, the other hand holding my elbow. His thumb runs over the skin of my arm and I feel it prickle under his touch.

I just close my eyes and stay there, partially exhausted but partially in content. Everything about this feels right and I know that there's no going back for us now. We've already reached the point of no return the moment he pressed his lips against mine at the farm. That was when we both knew what we wanted. For now things are going slow, which is something the both of us need.

In every relationship I've ever had with a man, I jumped into it straight away without thinking about the consequences and I always needed up getting hurt. But this time is different, it's with Daryl and he's not like the other guys I've been with. He's the most important person in my life and I don't want to lose him. He also has never experienced this before, this being new territory for both of us and we don't want to mess it up.

So instead of trying to think of a way to talk about is and what we are doing, instead I just sit here in his arms. In the world we live in now, there will only be few moment like this and I intend to take advantage of it for asking as I can. The talking can wait till later, we just want to be with each other for now. Neither one of us having to say a word.

As we sit there I can't help but wonder where everyone is. The place is quiet, meaning that no one is here. What else happened after T-Dog and I left to go close the gate? How much did we lose? Was there much damage? And I can't help but think the dreaded question, did we lose anyone else? Suddenly I hear the sound of the door to the cell block opening and I know that I will get my answers soon enough.