Chapter 18

I could feel Cato groaning under my weight. He swore under his breath as he tried to roll over. My arm was twisted under his shoulder and my head was lodged under his armpit. I distinctly remembered Cato pulling me into his arms as soon as the explosions started, so he shouldn't have been complaining. It was his fault. I untangled myself and tried to stand up. The explosions made that very difficult. The ground was still rumbling as the last few mines went off. I covered my ears and stayed where I was, realizing there was no point in standing up until it was over. Cato reached over and squeezed my hand. His palms were sweating, but it didn't really matter because mine probably were too. I squeezed back and waited for the thundering to stop.

Once the woods were quiet and the birds had returned to their usual chirping, we decided it would be safe to head back. Cato was convinced that whoever blew up our stuff was dead and he also believed that everything wasn't destroyed. I knew what we would find. I still jogged behind him, but the closer we got, the faster my heart raced. As we got closer we started to notice the smell. Dark smoke hung in the air and I could make out flickering flames through the trees. Cato tightened his grip on the sword and sprinted to the scene. I did my best to keep up and pulled out a few knives from my vest.

When I could finally see the wreckage my legs seemed to turn to rubber. My knees buckled and I fell to the ground, ash floating down around me. A giant pile of soot was in front of me, where a pyramid used to be. Cato was swearing madly, stomping over to Three. I knew what he was going to do, but I didn't want to watch. My eyes remained locked on the smoking ash. Everything was gone. Everything was destroyed. I buried my head in my hands as my body trembled. We had nothing. The boy's neck was snapped and a cannon followed.

Cato was still pacing back and forth, swearing and kicking at the smoking fragments. Marvel still wasn't back and was most likely hunting down Katniss. I started picking through the supplies, looking for any remaining objects. Ian's body lay crumbled on the ground, his legs twisted at awkward angles. I avoided looking in his direction as I dug through the pile.

A few objects had survived the explosion. Over the next twenty minutes I found a few water bottles, coils of knotted wire, all of our weapons, a couple of medical kits, and a few of the small metal crates. I cracked open the crates, hopeful of finding supplies. One of them contained granola bars, dried fruit, packets of crackers, and meat sticks. The others had a mixture of bug repellent, string, socks, matches, and other useless things. It was better than nothing. I kicked the supplies to the side and started to set up our puny camp.

About ten minutes later, Cato seemed to calm down. He was taking deep breaths and kicking at the ashes, looking for any remanding supplies.

"I think I got everything," I muttered, pointing to the three crates in front of me.

Cato glanced up at me, his forehead glistening with sweat. "I was just making sure." He reached down and picked up half of a sleeping bag. The ripped fabric was added to the pile and Cato sat down beside me.

"Now what do we do?" I whispered, as I leaned up against him.

"I don't know," he admitted. "Hunt?"

"Well, I guess." It wasn't that we couldn't hunt. That was one of the required skills to know at the Academy, but nobody ever had to use it. It was like math. The when-am-I-going-to-have-to-actually-use-this type of thing.

"How long do you think the food we have will last?" Cato asked, rummaging through the food crate.

Just as I was about to answer, a cannon was fired. Cato and I both jumped to our feet and grabbed our weapons. Had Marvel actually killed Katniss? Or had the massive boy from 11 managed to kill someone?

"Come on! Let's go!" Cato started heading toward the woods, his sword swinging beside him.

"What if it's a trap?" I called, glancing at our limited food supply. Whoever killed the tribute could be long gone. They could be waiting for us to leave. As soon as we disappeared into the trees, our supplies could be taken.

"It's probably just Marvel. Maybe he killed that red head." Cato replied.

"Then why would we need to go after him?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

Cato shrugged, glancing at the woods.

"We have no idea where he actually is," I added.

He sighed and dropped his sword. "Fine. We stay."

Cato collapsed on the ground beside me and reached for a granola bar. I could hear my stomach rumbling, but we had to make our supplies last. I gulped down my water bottle and tried not to watch him eat. To distract myself, I decided to pick through the ashes for more sleeping bag parts. The nights seemed to be getting colder and we would need everything we had. That's when the second cannon went off.

"Cato, I think we should go." I whispered, abandoning my blankets.

"We need to wait for Marvel first," Cato said. "If we leave now, he won't be able to find us."

I bit my lip. "I don't think he's coming back."

"What makes you think that?"

"Well, he's been gone all afternoon and we've heard two cannons."

"Do you think he left us?"

"Only one of us wins." I reminded him. "He probably took off while he had the chance."

Cato squinted at the setting sun. Golden light poured from between the tree branches, letting us know that the darkness would be here shortly.

Somehow I convinced Cato to leave. We packed everything in two of the backpacks and I was thankful for the little amount they weighed, even though it was only because of our lack of supplies. We filled our canteens with fresh water and started walking towards the woods. We wanted to have our temporary camp set up before the anthem played.

I trudged through the woods with Cato by my side for at least another hour. We slipped on the night vision goggles and I was instantly disappointed in myself. Why hadn't we used these earlier? Cato must have felt the same way because he only ran into one tree once he put them on. The swearing was also decreased.

Eventually, we decided we were far enough. I slipped off my backpack and slumped up against the tree. The air was chilly and all of our extra jackets, hats, and gloves had exploded. I stuffed my hands into my pockets as Cato unzipped his bag, pulling out the sleeping bag fragments. He joined me and tried to distribute the pieces. One covered each of my legs, another was wrapped around my waist. Since he was almost twice my size, his pieces didn't quite cover his legs.

I leaned up against his shoulder and closed my eyes, pretending we were somewhere else, anywhere else. I glanced up at his neck where my name was still scratched into his skin, barely visible. A smile tugged at my lips. He was mine and I was his. It was the way it had always been, the way it would always be. I couldn't imagine leaving without him. If I won the games and Cato had to die, would I really have won? I knew the answer. I knew deep down that I wasn't going to win. I couldn't win.

The anthem began to blare and Cato and I looked up through the trees. There were two cannons today, two faces up in the sky. Marvel. Marvel was the first face, followed by the girl from 11. Marvel was the first face. I felt my heart sink.

Dead.

"H-h-he's d-dead," I choked. I had felt betrayed when he hadn't come back, but he had been dead. I had hated myself for trusting him, but he had been dead. Cato reached for my hand, intertwining his fingers with mine. I wondered which cannon was his. If he had stuck with us, would he still be alive?

"There's only six of us left," I muttered.

"The girl from 5, the boy from 11, Katniss and Lover boy," Cato replied, still looking up at the sky where Marvel's face had been.

"So, do we hunt tomorrow?" I asked, trying to keep my eyes from flooding.

"I guess, but 12 has her bow and we've discovered she's impossible to destroy."

"Yeah," I replied, my words suffocating in my throat. I could barely talk. Marvel was dead and for some reason I wasn't celebrating. I wiped at my eyes with the back of my hand.

"Why am I sad?" I whispered, staring blankly ahead.

Cato tucked my head under his chin. "I don't know. I'm asking myself the same question."

"I was going to kill him eventually," I went on, my voice cracking. "I just don't understand. We were born to kill. I trained my whole life to get to this moment and for some reason I'm practically crying over a boy that I barely even knew. What's wrong with me?"

"Clove, nothing's wrong with you." He kissed the top of my head. "Yes, we were born to kill, but that doesn't mean we're machines. We're allowed to feel things, you're allowed to be sad. It's okay."

"I wish I was a machine," I muttered. "It would be so much easier."

"Me too," he replied, turning to me. "Because I wouldn't be so crazy in love with you." And then he was kissing me. His lips were hard on mine, his arms wrapped tightly around me, drawing me in. I was sure he could feel my heart rapidly beating, and how my entire body was shaking. I steadied my hands on the back of head, tugging at his hair. Chills danced across my arms and fire burned inside me. I was melting into the kiss.

I think the best part of it all was that, I, Clove Sevina, terrified of loving and guilty of keeping everyone out, loved it.

Cato and I were up by dawn, ready to move on. I think I was blushing the entire walk and I couldn't stop replaying the kiss, over and over in my head. Of course, this was a problem. This couldn't happen. I had been in love with him and he had loved me, but now it seemed official. What a great timing. What a tragic love story. I just hoped he could get over me and find someone better. I wasn't that great, it wouldn't be hard.

Cato didn't seem to notice that our days were numbered. He held my hand while we walked and kissed my nose. It all seemed so cheesy, but it still managed to make my heart flutter. I could almost imagine Cato's friends watching as they snicked saying, "Ha! I told you they would hook up! I won the bet, now hand me my money!"

That day was more than just Cato making me blush and feel like melting. We managed to kill a turkey and we cooked it over the fire with a nice dried fruit topping. After the meal, I volunteered to pick some berries. We had snacked a lot of the walk, which was a mistake and we needed some more food. Starving to death had never even crossed my mind in ways to die.

I headed toward the nearby river, trying to identify berries as Cato stayed back, attempting to hunt. I had gathered a good handful when a crackling sound boomed down from above. The berries flew out of my hands as I whipped out a knife.

Claudius Templesmith's voice filled the arena, congratulating the six of us who remained. I lowered my knife and listened, expecting an announcement for a feast. That wasn't it. There was a rule change. A rule change?! The Hunger Games really didn't have any rules. Don't eat each other because the Capitol thinks it's gross and don't step off your platform before sixty seconds, but that was it.

"The regulations requiring a single victor have been suspended. From now on two victors may be crowned if both are from the same district. This will be the only announcement." It took a moment for his words to sink in. Once they did, the knife in my hand clattered to the ground and I was sprinting.

"Clove!"

"Cato!"

I smacked right into him, sending us both tumbling toward the ground. We were both laughing and crying as we lay beside each other, pulling our bodies together. Two Victors. We could both make it out. We could both survive. We could be together and nothing could get in the way. Cato leaned in to kiss me and I felt the world fade away.

We would be okay.