28

Amora

I sat staring off as everyone played on the field, sighing once I realized I was staring at Benny again.

I shook my head, growing angry with myself as I pushed myself up from the bench.

"Carrie, I'm going for a walk" I huffed out, uncrossing my legs and standing up.

"Want me to come?" She asked, watching when I stood up from the bench.

"No, I'm fine I'll be back real quick" I answered, brushing my skirt off before walking away.

I walked out of the sandlot, letting out a stressed huff once I was walking down the sidewalk.

I felt confused, and out of control with my own emotions and feelings. I felt like the world was upside down and it was slipping right through my fingers.

I needed to go to a sacred place where I can gather my thoughts, and regain my stability.

—

"Thank you!" I smiled, taking the bag from the women before pushing myself off the counter.

I stepped out of the shop looping the bag through my arm, before walking off down the sidewalk.

As I walked down the street gazing into each store that I passed, I soon fell into a deep conversation with myself.

What is going on with me?

Oh this whole Benny thing is completely weakening me.

I have no idea why I'm even acting like this, and zero clue as to why I even told him about my mom or my stupid failed relationship.

I mean, I've never liked talking about things like that and would absolutely never just tell someone like that.

Yet, I just did.

But why?

Why on total earth did I feel so comfortable with him too completely just spill to him. I just don't get it.

Ugh what am I even saying?

This is like Benny that I'm talking about here. The Benny that I've despised ever since he completely ruined my Pucci skirt by spilling milk on it like the total clutz that he is.

So why was I even stressing so much about him.

He's like a slug, that's only ever in the sandlot playing his baseball and constantly saying things that he absolutely knows would get under my skin.

He's not even cute!

I think?

Suddenly an image of Benny flashed through my mind, making me groan and rub my eyes in frustration.

Ok ok, so he's somewhat of a dreamboat? Whatever.

Who even cares about him right?

Yes, although he may annoy me and make me want to completely smack him across the face every time he said a word.

He still somehow managed to make me nervous? Not like a jitterbug but, made my heart pick up, and made me smile, blush?

But it's absolutely not like I like him or anything? I'm just saying.

Suddenly it was like realization just yelled at me, and punched me right in the face for being so clueless.

Immediately I paused in my tracks, dropping the bag from my arm.

"Oh my god!" I shouted, widening my eyes in realization.

"I like Benny!" I gasped loudly, pointing my finger to my chest.

"Oh my god..Im totally, majorly crazy crushing on Benny right now!" I exclaimed once more, throwing my hands into my hair.

I let out a stunned breathe, running my hand through my hair as I stared off into the distance in total shock with myself.

I furrowed my eyebrows at the woman who gave me a weird look, making me immediately shake my head and pick up my bag before rushing off.

——

But now, I didn't know how too act around him.

Normally I'd probably be calling him some sort of name and secretly hoping that the baseball would fly over and hit either him or Aubrey in the face.

That couldn't happen now because Aubrey was gone and kicked out of the sandlot immediately once the boys found out about what happened. And Benny... well oh forget it.

So now I sat, tensed and uncomfortable as I stared off to the ground deep in my own thoughts

"What's up with you?" A voice asked, making me blink and shake my thoughts away before looking up.

"Nothing? Why- why I'm fine?" I stammered, immediately choking once seeing Benny who stood in front of me.

He stared at me examining my face carefully before slowly cracking into a small smile.

"I know what's going on" he trailed off, crossing his arms with a smug smile painted on his face.

Immediately it felt like my throat closed off and my heart stopped."You do?" I choked, raising my eyebrows.

"Yeah.. you like someone.. here" he stated, pointing at me before sitting down next to me.

Instantly my breathe hitched with my heart thumping so loud I could hear it in my ears at the fact he somehow knew! How?

"What- pfft no. No way!" I stammered, immediately shaking my head in denial.

"Yeah you do. I can see it" he insisted, nodding his head."Which one is it?" He questioned, looking back to the boys on the field.

"Are you mental! I said I don't, that's just gross" I scoffed, crossing my arms angrily as I leaned back against the dugout wall.

"I'm just joking. Then what is it? You've been real quiet" He questioned, shaking off his hat before placing it back onto his head.

"Nothing I was just.. thinking. Not crushing on those goony heads?" I explained, shaking my head as I looked back to the ground.

"Thinking.. about?" He slowly questioned, looking over at me for my answer.

"About... ugh nothing, whatever. Why do you even care?" I questioned, luckily catching myself from spilling.

He stared at me thinking about what too say before shrugging and looking away."I don't know. But there's something bothering you. That, I can see"

"Wow, you can read me now?" I questioned, rolling my eyes sarcastically.

"I guess yeah?" He shrugged, cracking a small smile.

"Yeah whatever" I muttered shaking my head, waving him off before crossing my arms.

We both looked back towards the field with silence growing between us, only hearing the faint sound of the boys arguing on the field.

"Benny?" I chirped suddenly, slowly sitting back up."Yeah?" He answered immediately, looking away from the field to me.

"Do you... like me?" I slowly questioned, titling my head slightly.

Immediately his eyes widened, coughing with his face growing pink."W-what?" He stammered, letting out another cough.

"No no! Oh my god no not like that I mean... like as a person? Are we friends? Would you consider me as your friend?" I quickly rephrased, explaining what I meant.

"Oh, yeah.. I guess I would" He slowly answered, nodding his head to my question.

Slowly I cracked a small smile, holding back the beaming smile I wanted to let out."You do?" I whispered, not being able to let out anything louder.

"Yeah...do you?" He questioned, looking up from the ground to look at me.

I thought, tilting my head as I tapped my chin."Huh... I don't know"

Instantly his face fell making me crack a small laugh and shake my head."Just joking. I somewhat do.. I guess" I nodded.

Now it was his turn too crack a small smile as he nodded his head."Good. I'll take it" he replied, way lower and softer this time.

I nodded my head head with a smile, slowly beginning to fall into a stare the more I looked at him.

Oh Amora look away what are you doing!

But I can't.. I mean look at the boy.

"Benny! Are we playing or what?" Kenny shouted, luckily interrupting me and making me look away.

"Yeah yeah what's happened? We've been waiting!" Yeah-yeah exclaimed after, holding his hands up.

Benny rolled his eyes at the boys who continued to shout at him, sighing as he looked back towards me.

"Yeah go already. You're totally bugging me here can't you see?" I shook my head, waving him too go off.

He cracked a small smile shaking his head at me before pushing himself up from the bench and jogging off.

I sighed crossing my arms as I watched him, thinking back to myself.

Gosh this is not good. I can't like him!