Harry Potter // Tough

requested by _stellastylessI know I'm super late but I've been really busy with school and some personal stuff...BUT it's better late than never!!hope you like it <3

*this is EDITED *

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Being the daughter of the two most evilest Death Eaters of Voldemort's inner circle was bad enough to gain me a poor reputation at school, but in the words of my mother, 'It is an honour that your parents are in such good relations with the Dark Lord, the most powerful wizard!' But, seriously, no I don't want to be honoured. I felt ashamed, revolted on hearing Voldemort's plans and terrible schemes since the age of 5, when my parents told me about it. But, back then he was plainly known as Tom Riddle.

Luckily, I wasn't the only one who hated this. Draco Malfoy, my cousin, shared the same views about it, but he played along better than I did and didn't end up being given nasty looks by all Death Eaters.

Hogwarts was amazing. Of all my classes, Potions was my favourite. I always excelled at it and never failed to bring a smug look on Snape's face when my concoction turned out the best in class.

And then, came the most magical part of my day. The green-eyed boy  whom I was head over heels for. The spectacaled boy never failed to bring a smile to my face. He always managed to make me smile just by looking at me. That should give you an idea of how much I adored the human. If I was going to be honest, I always thought that Harry had hated me, and maybe he did have a reason to.

Other than that, I stuck around with Hermione. I always got a few insults because of that, but none to my face, because everybody was...afraid of my parents. Hermione was the only one who would understand me, and I was grateful to her.

"Mister Potter, I don't believe the recipe to the Draught of Living Dead is written over Miss Lestrange's face. Look into your book." Snape's silky voice rang through the dungeon over the sounds of boiling potions.

The Slytherins snorted and laughed as Draco sent me a knowing smile and I looked at Harry's red faced, embarassed reaction. Five minutes before the class ended, Snape went around criticising everybody's potions, but sending a smug smile when he passed by mine and Draco's. He gagged visibly on reaching Harry's and I knew that an insult was coming on.

"Mister Potter, unlike the other's, yours reminds me of the time the Flobberworms threw up. You will need remedial classes and seeing the only person with a shred of talent in this class is Miss Lestrange, she will help you." Snape turned and his robe flew with him. He completely missed Harry's bewildered expression and went on, "Class dismissed."

Everybody scurried out of class and just as I got out of class, Harry came up to me, his hand on the back of his neck. Draco grabbed my waist to keep me steady. I didn't know if it was a trick of light or anything but his eyes drifted to the hand on my waist and the sparkle in his eye died.

"Y/N, are you free after lunch? I thought we could do our remedial classes then?" Harry smiled and shouldered his bag.

"I can make it work before dinner, if that's fine." I pushed my books in the bag and Draco, next to me, narrowed his eyes at Harry who brightly said, "Sure. I'll meet you in the library at 5."

**********

"Harry, no offence, but you're not even trying to understand any of this. This potion is important. N.E.W.T level important." I said, tentatively as I tapped the table with the quill. It had been over an hour, with all our laughter and jokes and criticising Madam Pince. It was time to be serious.

"Well, I'm sorry, but Potions has always been boring and I never will succeed at this." Harry rolled his eyes and I raised an eyebrow at him.

"This would never be boring if you'd only pay attention and not see this subject as an obstacle!" I said, offended.

"Easy for you to say, you and the rest of the Slytherins are Snape's favourites." Harry looked at me from across the table and I looked at him exasperated.

"Harry-"

"And not to mention that he's a part of your family's inner circle of Voldemort." I flinched at this. I flinched so hard, and not because I was afraid of his name, it's because I wanted nothing to do with him and having any relations with him made me sick.

Realisation dawned on Harry's face and he stood up and I knew what he was going to say next, "You're one of them, aren't you?" The Death Eaters usually flinched on hearing Voldemort's name because they never used it and instead called him the Dark Lord.

"What? Harry, no. Whatever it is that you're thinking, it's not it. Please-" I stood up, begging.

"No. You're one of them. You're a traitor."

Traitor.

His words felt like a slap on the face and my eyes began to sting with tears. I turned away from him and grabbed my books and pulled my sleeve up, tears running down my eyes, showing my bare sleeve, "Here, have a look at the traitor's Dark Mark, maybe now you'll know that I have standards higher than anything else." And I left the library, and heard a faint, "Y/N! Wait."

After taking a few missed turns, I ran into Draco, who was in search for me, but when he saw the tears in my eyes, he looked like he could kill. After telling him what happened, I cried, and he comforted me but we didn't talk much, and I didn't let him talk about Harry either.

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I slammed the books on the table as I saw Hermione visibly jump and look up at me in surprise, "What's wrong?"

"Harry Potter. That's what's  wrong." I gritted my teeth and sat opposite Hermione and opened a book.

"Oh, it's alright Y/N, he's pretty bad at Potions; it's pretty annoying to teach-"

"He called me a traitor." I told her silently as Hermione gave a slight gasp and reached out for my hand.

"I know he doesn't know much about me, but that still doesn't give him the right to call me that, Hermione." I said, my voice breaking. I looked at her face,"Is this how everybody looks at me?"

"Y/N-" Hermione began, but I stood up abruptly for I had just seen the green-eyed boy enter the library.

"I can't face him. I'm out of here. I'll catch up with you in Potions." I give Hermione a quick hug and stalked past him and made sure that he saw me, but made no eye contact with him.

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"Now, I want you all to open page 79 and make sure all of you read and understand the concept of making this potion easy. The Strengthening Solution is not easy to make." Snape's eyes darted across the classroom as we looked at him explain. "You have an hour to finish it and I expect complete silence whilst doing so. You may start."

The room was filled with noises of benches scratching on the floor and students hustling to collect the ingredients. My luck, I was seated right next to Potter; not on the same bench though. At the beginning of the class I had ignored him completely, and I  thought he would give up but, Salazar, was the boy adamant. Just as I began to pour in the Salamander's blood, Harry leaned in to my ear and said, "Can I talk to you?"

"I don't want to hear anything from you. Just leave me alone, will you?"

"Y/N, I really didn't mean to, I'm so sorry-"

"Shut your face, Potter and don't - "

"Potter, Lestrange, I thought I had said complete silence? How hard is it for these two words to penetrate through your thick skulls?" Snape sneered at us. Apparently he wasn't in a good mood today. And unfortunately, I knew why.

I mumbled a 'sorry' and I meant it. Harry on the other hand kept apologising to me and I snapped, "Potter watch your next words very carefully because if you don't, I'm going to pour Salamnder's blood down your biased throat."

"Well you wouldn't have to if you could just hear me out!" Harry said loudly, exasperated and stepped closer to me, his cauldron long lost and forgotten.

"Don't take another step, Potter. Just leave me-" I said a bit too loudly.

"Lestrange, Potter, detention. Tonight at 8." Snape cut me off and glared at the two of us.

"What? That's bullocks. He was the one arguing, Sna-" I raged.

"Did I stutter?" He narrowed his eyes at the two of us.

I scoffed at Harry and went back to churning the potion, blocking out my surroundings and rage filling through me. My mum would definitely hear about this and she won't be happy.

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The cauldrons were filthy as ever and Snape, as a part of our detention, told us to clean the cauldrons and the mess that the 1st year students had made the class before. Without wands. Potter and I were given soaps and brushes and gloves and we were made to clean it 'till I see my reflection', Snape had told us.

"Thanks a lot, Potter." I scowled at him. This was the first time we had spoken since we came for detention and to be honest, the silence was getting awkward so I had to break it. I shoved the boxes of Lacewings into the drawer and slammed it shut. We had just finished cleaning the cauldrons and floor and we were now arranging the shelves.

"Y/N...please. Hear me out." Harry set an empty jar on the counter and looked at me with pleading eyes.

I pulled out my gloves, "You've got nothing to say to me."

Harry ignored me, "I...what I said was very insensitive. I should've thought of it before I openend my mouth. I've known you for so long and I know that you wouldn't want anything to do with...them."

"You should've thought about it then." I walked away from him and threw the gloves into the bucket of trash.

"I've known you for long enough and I know you're nothing like your parents and I know you don't want anything to do with them. I've been going through something, something that you already know and everywhere I go, my paranoid ass sees Death Eaters everywhere. I'm so, so sorry. I really wish I could-"

"Just forget about it." I sighed and looked up at the clock, "Time's up. See you never."

I stalked towards the door, but Harry, persistent as ever, grabbed my wrist and stopped me, "I'm sorry, Y/N. I really am. Please, forgive me."

I turned to face him and saw the look on his face and sighed, "Let go of me."

Harry swallowed, "I - yes, of course. Y/N, I would never want to see yoy hurt, and I hate the fact that I was the person who hurt you. I don't deserve you, and I wish I could think of something to make it up to-"

I cut him off and placed my lips on his, clutching his tie to bring him closer. He sighed into the kiss and smiled a little as he rested his palm on my cheek. I pulled back a little and said, "You had me at 'I don't deserve you'."

"I'm sorry." He kissed my cheek. "I'm so sorry." A kiss on my forhead. "I'm an idiot." A kiss on my nose."I promise I won't ever let you get hurt again." And he pecked my lips.

"Apology accepted." I smiled in content as I heard footsteps coming from the door. I stepped back from Harry as the potions master entered the room and raised a sly eyebrow at us. He scrutinised the room and waved, "Off you go."

We didn't needed to be told twice. The two of us rushed outside and scurried off.

Harry glanced back at the dungeon door, "That was weird. It was almost as if he wanted us to patch up..."

************

Holy moley that was long.

This month is Suicide Prevention month.

"It's okay to ask for help."

Whatever anyone is going through I'm here for you. Talk to me or message me about anything. Talk to one another and don't ever forget, you're never alone. I went through this phase; I was depressed and I thought I didn't have anyone. But, if you surround yourself with the right people, I promise you, you will be alright. Just talk it out.

I love each and every one of you so much!

xoxox <3