To Spoon Feed You Comfort final

Credit goes to SunnyRose

Chapter 3: Hungry and Sick

Summary:Bilbo and Thorin have a talk (sort of) and then BOTFA.

Bilbo decided quite adamantly, he did not enjoy this town of men. He did not care for the fact that he could hear the lapping waves inches beneath the boards he walked. He was repulsed by the smell of rotting fish and bodily odors that hung thick in the air. Mostly though, he was sick and tired of being jostled around as the ridiculously tall people around him hurried about their daily activities not used and not caring that someone shorter might be under their big stupid boots.

Needless to say, he didn’t venture out very often, and certainly the dwarves never let him go by himself. They had all been rather overprotective since arriving in Laketown. As if they suspected one of the men of whisking him away for some unknown reason. Currently, he was flanked by Dwalin and Dori, both taking to glaring at anyone who got too close. Thorin was just ahead talking to Balin about supplies they would need to see them safely to Erebor. Bilbo wasn’t certain why he was asked to come along other than the fact that he was about the only one not doing anything else and could carry rations as well as anyone else.

He was steered towards a shabby building with a mortar and pestle carved into the sign outside of it. Bilbo assumed they were getting herbs for Oin. He had been talking all morning about needing some if he were to make his paste to treat burns, and that had been as far as Bilbo allowed himself to focus on that. Sometimes he could forget there was a fire breathing dragon at the end of this journey, and sometimes the fact that he would be facing said beast alone was all that he could think about. He’d much rather not send himself into a panic attack in public if he could help it.

Everyone else had already entered the apothecary when the shop next door caught Bilbo’s attention. He peered into the window seeing all sorts of different stones set in bronze or iron settings. There was a glittering green stone in what appeared to be a bracelet of some sort. An amber stone in a necklace. But it was the blue stones decorating what appeared to be hair beads that gave him pause. It wouldn’t be any grand sort of gift, but he could just visualize it hanging in Thorin’s long hair playing off his equally stunning eyes. He was allowed to get his husband a gift after all.

He deflated with a sigh, wondering just how Thorin would actually respond to such a gift. It’s been months, and Thorin hadn’t given him any sort of sign of accepting their newly revealed status. He also hadn’t given him any sign of rejecting him either, leaving Bilbo in this strange middle ground of wanting to be closer but not sure how welcome his advances would be.

“See something you like?”

Bilbo flinched as he looked up…and up at the man who was grinning down at him. Bilbo returned the smile, albeit weakly.

“Uh, no. I was just…admiring the wares. Are you the proprietor?”

“No.” The man denied with a laugh. “I'm just someone who appreciates quality when I see it.”

“Oh yes, they’re quite beautiful.” Bilbo agreed, looking back at the hair beads.

“I wasn’t talking about the jewelry.”

Bilbo stiffened. Slowly, he looked back up at the man, this time seeing the signs for what they were. The leering grin, the eyes darting over his person, hovering a step too close into his personal space. Bilbo felt himself flush, unused to having such attention turned upon him. And now he could see two more leering men behind this one. Lovely.

“What do you say we go somewhere else?” The man insinuated.

“No thank you. I’m perfectly fine right here.” Bilbo chirped.

“Oh come on.” He insisted. “You’ll have fun, I promise.”

His hand snaked around behind Bilbo’s shoulders, but before it could connect, someone knocked it away. Bilbo’s breath caught to see Thorin step in front of him, arms crossed, and jaw tight.

“I believe he gave you his answer.”

The man frowned down at Thorin as the other two stepped forward.

“And who asked for your opinion, Dwarf.” The man growled, attempting to reach for Bilbo again.

Bilbo shrunk further behind Thorin’s back right as Dwalin and Dori appeared on either side of Thorin. All three of them stood as tall as they could make themselves appear, chest puffed out, and arms bulging from where they were crossed over their chests. The man and his cronies took a hesitant step backwards.

“Leave. Now.” Thorin ordered.

The tension held for a long moment, but the man decided it wasn’t worth the fight as he tried to give Bilbo one last look before walking away. Thorin’s eyes followed him all the way to the end of the dock until he was completely out of sight. Only then did he turn back to Balin.

“Can you handle everything from here?”

The older dwarf nodded, and Thorin immediately turned back around to Bilbo, grabbing him by the forearm and yanking him along after him.

“What are you…? Stop, Thorin! That hurts!”

Thorin released him the moment he asked only to settle his hand between Bilbo’s shoulder blades instead. Bilbo reconciled with the idea that Thorin felt the need for physical contact as he was hurried along back to their inn, up the stairs, and straight into Thorin’s bedroom. The dwarf shut the door with more force than Bilbo thought was strictly necessary before turning his wild eyes onto Bilbo.

“What were you thinking?! Do you have any idea what could have happened?”

“Well, yes, Thorin. As it stands, I’m not an idiot.” Bilbo huffed, hands on his hips. “I was handling it.”

“Handling it.” Thorin repeated, his voice tight and incredulous. “And if he had decided to just throw you over his shoulder and take you?”

“There’s no need for dramatics!” Bilbo threw his hands into the air. “I had my sword with me, and I’ve become quite proficient with it at this point.”

“You were supposed to be inside with us!” Thorin roared. “Not…dallying with strange men!”

“Dallying? Really? ” Bilbo scoffed. “You certainly have a skewed perspective of the events, Thorin Oakenshield.”

Bilbo attempted to leave after that. Certainly not willing to put up with Thorin accusing him of leading them on of all things when Thorin grabbed him by his arm again.

“What?!” Bilbo demanded, spinning around towards him. “What else could you possibly…?”

He was cut off by a mouth seizing his own with near bruising force as he was pulled closer into Thorin’s chest. Bilbo was hit with the sensations of Thorin’s smell, his taste, his warmth pressing up against him, and he realized with a sudden sense of clarity that it had been Rivendell when he last experienced such attention. Bilbo threw his arms around Thorin’s neck, pulling him down as much as he was pulling himself up, trying to get more. More contact, more of that lovely friction against his interested cock, more Thorin. It was as Thorin’s hands moved down to squeeze his ass that Bilbo woke up from the wonderful dream happening before him.

“Wait!” Bilbo declared, pulling back just far enough to look Thorin in the eye. “What is this? Why are you…?”

Thorin cut him off with another searing kiss as he started moving them towards the bed.

“No questions. Not yet. We’ll talk after.” Thorin grunted in the moments they came up for air.

Bilbo hesitated just long enough to convince himself that this was a terrible idea. They both had different expectations of this relationship. Bilbo could not in good conscience be a willing bedmate every time Thorin got the urge when he still didn’t know where they stood within their marriage. It was an argument in his head that lasted all up until Thorin began sucking at his earlobe. At which point, he threw his head back with a high-pitched mewl, and became very adamant that Thorin could do whatever he liked to him. As Thorin said, they would talk after.

Divesting each other of their Laketown hand-me-downs was short work as they scrambled to get up on top of the mattress. Thorin laid Bilbo down in the sheets, and Bilbo realized rather quickly this was much different than the first time. Thorin hovered over Bilbo, his weight pinning him in place as he took his time mapping out Bilbo’s skin with his kisses. His lips, his jaw, his neck, that patch of freckles on his shoulder, his chest, his stomach. Meanwhile, his hands traced the curves of his body, traveling up his ribs and back down his arms. It was like Bilbo was something to be worshipped, and it had him jerking up a few times as the pleasure overwhelmed him.

Khuzdul slipped from Thorin’s mouth, low and encouraging, even if Bilbo had no idea as to what he was saying. It still was enough to soothe him as Thorin trailed lower. His hair brushing Bilbo’s thighs as he kissed at Bilbo’s hips, lingering just before Bilbo’s cock. Pleas fell from his lips as Thorin’s hand firmly, but not painfully held him in place. Then he swallowed him down in one gulp. An unabashed moan escaped him as he threw his head back and curled his toes. The wet heat surrounding him so intensely sucking and licking and driving him mad as Thorin’s head bobbed up and down on Bilbo’s groin. In fact, almost embarrassingly, it was undoing him far faster than he anticipated as he gave Thorin warning about his impending release. Thorin held him still as he swallowed him down. Every last drop, still licking and sucking to the point of oversensitivity.

“A moment, just a moment please and you can do whatever else you want with me.” Bilbo panted.

Thorin finally pulled off, a smirk playing across his face as he used the back of his hand to wipe away some lingering saliva and cum.

“Whatever I want, hm?” He asked as he hand traveled down Bilbo’s crack to toy at his hole.

“Yes!” Bilbo arched, wanting to feel him inside him again so bad. “Get some oil and I should be good to go by then.”

Thorin hopped down to do exactly that as Bilbo flipped himself over on his stomach in preparation. However, as soon as Thorin got back on the bed, he flipped Bilbo back over.

“I want to see you this time.” He stated to Bilbo’s inquiring eyebrow raise.

Bilbo felt his throat go dry at the unexpected confession, not quite sure what to do with it. Before he could work himself up into overthinking what might only be a simple statement in the heart of passion, his eyes fell south to Thorin’s half hard dick. He signaled for the dwarf to come closer thinking he could do with a little worship of his own. His hand gently took hold of his cock, rubbing his thumb over the head as he pulled himself up to meet Thorin’s chest with his mouth. He gave some attention to his nipples before tracing the scars of battles past with his lips. The teeth marks from the warg still an angry red even after all this time, and Bilbo did his best to soothe them as he stroked Thorin back to hardness. Precum coated his hand giving him a smoother glide as he gave a long, languid pull with just the right amount of pressure to have Thorin hissing and arching his back.

“Enough.” Thorin gasped. “Or I might just spill over your stomach.”

“Would that be so bad?” Bilbo teased.

“It would when I want to feel you around me when it happens.” He grunted.

Again with the matter-of-fact delivery of words that Bilbo would certainly be pining over once they were done. Did Thorin even know how romantic he was coming across? Was that his intention? Or is this just how he talks to his partners when he takes them to bed?

Thorin didn’t allow Bilbo to ponder over such thoughts for long as he slicked his hand in oil, and pressed a single finger against his rim. Bilbo reminded himself to relax as he welcomed the intrusion, Thorin’s other hand finding its way around Bilbo’s dick as it mimicked the moves he had just pressed upon him. Stroking him back to hardness once again. That’s when Thorin added a second finger.

“You’re doing so well. Shush, malkânê (my hobbit).” Thorin murmured so sweetly as he aided Bilbo in spreading his thighs a bit further to help with the feeling of fullness.

Bilbo felt like he was going crazy as Thorin took his time stretching him. Lazily scissoring him open, hitting that spot that had Bilbo seeing stars. It was as he teased him with a third finger that Bilbo felt the need to speed things along. He pushed up, flipping Thorin onto his back in a move that was surprisingly reminiscent of their first time as Thorin's fingers fell out his backside and he straddled the dwarf’s waist. Bilbo grabbed Thorin’s slick hand, helping him to grease his own cock before slowly lowering himself down onto the dwarf’s erection.

The breach of his head past Bilbo’s rim had him throwing his head back as he tried to remember how to breathe. More Khuzdul rained down upon him, leaving Thorin’s lips like prayers to their smith god. Thorin’s hands came up to grip his sides in support, kneading the soft fat like dough even though Bilbo had lost an alarming amount of weight on this journey. He slid down another inch, the strain of going so slowly burning almost as much as the breach itself. He kept going, inch by inch, sliding up and down to get comfortable before he finally was seated fully against Thorin’s base. Thorin gave him a moment to fully adjust before lifting his hips and jerking up into him.

“Yes!” Bilbo exclaimed breathlessly.

Encouraged by Bilbo’s affirmation, Thorin did it again. Faster. Bilbo started moving up and down as well. Meeting Thorin’s thrusts so he could find him again, deeper this time. Pressing against his insides in a way that had him squirming. Thorin’s grunts gave way to lewd moans as a particular thrust had him tightening around his cock just on the pleasurable side of too much. Bilbo knew he wasn’t going to last much longer, especially having cum once that night already. His hand found its way to his cock, stroking himself in time with the rhythm of their thrusts, until Thorin batted him away to do it himself. His hand, still oily, fit perfectly around him as the squelch of his glides added to the symphony of skin hitting and voices panting.

All it took was Thorin hitting that sweet spot once more for Bilbo to release over his stomach. Bilbo screamed out, feeling all of his pent up energy leaving him in that one swoosh as he tried to topple over to the side. Thorin, of course, followed him pushing them back into their original positions as he continued to piston inside him.

“Almost.” He promised as he thrust harder and faster, chasing his own high.

Bilbo’s body was limp and pliable below him, letting Thorin use him as he wished only complaining when it just pushed to oversensitivity. Thorin gave one last push before spilling deep inside him. Somewhere caught between a sigh and a purr, Thorin made the most surprising noise as he slumped over beside Bilbo. He gave a tired chuckle as he pushed some of the sweaty strands out of Thorin’s face. Before he could retract his hand, Thorin held it in his own and gave a soft kiss to his palm. Bilbo’s breath caught at the uncharacteristically sweet gesture.

“Thorin…” He started only to be interrupted.

“I never saw myself getting married.”

Oh.

Bilbo had rather incorrectly assumed Thorin would be a bit more delicate when he breached this subject. Bilbo did his best to hide his wince, but he must not have been successful as Thorin’s other hand came up to cradle his head as it lightly played with his curls.

“That…came out poorly. You must understand, ever since the dragon, my thoughts have been consumed with doing what’s best for my people. I didn’t even give myself time to consider the idea of marriage. Much less look for prospective partners. I was prepared to be a bachelor king who was succeeded by his nephew.”

“Then you ate from my spoon.” Bilbo murmured softly.

Thorin chuckled, his eyes warm as he repeated the sentiment. “Yes, I ate from your spoon.”

“Do you regret it?”

Thorin busied himself with playing with Bilbo’s hand. So much softer and smaller in Thorin’s large, calloused one.

“It does not matter one way or another. It has happened. My bigger concern is can you be happy in such a marriage? Can you be consort to the dwarven kingdom of Erebor?”

Consort? Consort! How did it escape Bilbo that he married a king?! He had been so wrapped up in the fact that it was Thorin. He didn’t even think of what their life would be after this. They were mere days away from retaking Thorin’s kingdom. A kingdom that will need to be rebuilt after decades of damage and decay. A kingdom that would look to him for guidance as one of their leaders. Could Bilbo step into such a role?

He heaved a hitched sigh before answering. “It’s as you said. It doesn’t matter now.”

Bilbo could tell from the press of Thorin’s lips that he didn’t care for that answer. Bilbo wished he had some way to soothe him, but for once, words escaped him. He didn’t even know where they stood. What was this? Lust and desire for a warm body or something more? Bilbo knew with every passing day it was closer to the latter for him, but he dare not mention it. For if he named it now when there was so much uncertainty, he would almost assuredly get his heart broken.

“I think…I should like you to stay when our quest is over. At least for a little while until we can figure this out.”

Bilbo felt his heart hammering away, and he realized he was far too late. Named or unnamed, it was there, and most likely not going away. But if Thorin needed time…

“I would like that.” He replied with a quick smile.

Thorin smiled in return as he fell back against the pillows, letting his eyes close for just a moment. Bilbo found himself wanting to trace the planes across his face. Know Thorin even more intimately than even their fits of passion could reveal. He refrained, and Thorin, of course, used that moment to pull himself out of bed to pull his clothes back on. Bilbo followed suit thinking about how he was on a time limit. He needed to prove he could be a worthy spouse of Thorin, and there was no better opportunity than burglaring from a dragon.

***

If only the dragon had been the greatest of their problems. Bilbo sat in the newly reclaimed Erebor feeling more lost than ever. A gem roughly the size of his hand sat heavy in his pocket as he stared out across the treasure hoard to spy a figure. A figure that had decked himself out in thick furs and heavy golden armor. His husband was hardly recognizable these days.

A hand came down on his shoulder, and Bilbo looked up to Balin staring out with the same lost look of bitterness and regret. Bilbo had confided in Balin. Told him of what he had hidden away. The older dwarf had pleaded with him to keep it out of Thorin’s hands as it would only make him worse, but Bilbo couldn’t do that. He had made a promise that he wouldn’t keep anything from Thorin again. And it was his integrity as a Baggins and as Thorin’s husband that finally had him standing and approaching the King Under the Mountain.

“Thorin…” Bilbo started only for the dwarf to cut him off.

“Bilbo! I’m glad you’re here.” Thorin grinned as he wrapped an arm around Bilbo’s shoulders. “Look at it. Gold beyond measure, and it’s all ours. ”

Shame rolled in his gut at the little thrill he got from Thorin referring to it as ‘ours’. Thorin’s eyes fell down to the mithril peeking under the collar of Bilbo’s coat, his gaze intense, his smile sharp. A token of his regard is what he had called it. Not a gift between husbands, not even a courting gift. A bribe to placate his bedmate. Bilbo had almost refused, but Thorin had all but demanded he put it on in a tone that had left no room for arguments. Bilbo had feared in that one small moment what would happen if he did. So he wore the light armor, actually thankful for the small measure of protection.

“Thorin, I have something I must tell you.” Bilbo declared.

“Can it wait, ibinê (my gem)? We need to find the Arkenstone before tomorrow. Before those cowardly men and elves…”

“It can not wait!” Bilbo interrupted loud enough to get all the other dwarves paying attention to them.

Thorin’s expression turned menacing so quickly that Bilbo actually had to take a step backwards. He had to remind himself that he was not afraid of Thorin Oakenshield, but he might be a little skittish around the King Under the Mountain.

“Very well. I’m listening.” He growled.

Bilbo swallowed thickly before continuing. “I once promised you that I would never hide anything from you again. Because husbands must trust each other, do you remember that?”

Thorin’s expression softened as a glimmer of the real him poked through the madness.

“I remember.”

“Good, because I need you to trust me now. Do you trust me?”

Thorin hesitated before he nodded, and suddenly what he was about to do felt monumental. Thorin told him as such that he didn’t even trust his own kin. Yet, he offers Bilbo that trust so freely. Bilbo felt something possessive and proud stir inside him at this thought that he viciously shoved back. It would be his actions that would speak louder still. Slowly, Bilbo pulled the Arkenstone from his pocket watching the awe and joy swim in Thorin’s eyes that reflected the rainbow colors back at him.

“The Arkenstone. You…you…”

“Yes, I have it, but I can not give it to you.”

Thorin looked dumbfounded, to say the least. It would have been quite comical if Bilbo weren’t shaking under the weight of his stare. Sure enough, his features quickly morphed as outright fury took him. He took a step towards Bilbo, and Bilbo matched that distance backwards.

“What do you mean, you can’t give it to me?” He snarled.

“W-Well, you see…”

“That stone is my birthright! You have no claim-!”

“You are changed, Thorin!” Bilbo interrupted. “The Thorin I knew would never go back on his word or doubt the loyalty of his kin!”

“You speak to me of loyalty ?”

“You said you trust me.” Bilbo implored. “Trust me now when I say, this isn’t you. This stone will only make you worse, and I cannot let that happen. I care about you too much.”

“That was before I knew I had been BETRAYED!” Thorin roared. “What right do you have to make decisions in my stead?”

A hand came down on Bilbo’s shoulder, and he turned his head in surprise to see Balin standing at his side, and the rest of the company not far behind.

“He is your Consort.” Balin reminded. “He has the only right.”

Thorin looked between the dwarves lined up behind Bilbo with an uncertainty in his gaze. Hope stirred inside Bilbo for the first time since this conversation began. If they could capitalize on his doubt, maybe they could get the old Thorin back! That hope quickly sunk the moment Thorin locked gazes with him again. Any doubt had been hidden behind a carefully constructed mask of rage and hate, and Bilbo just knew in that moment whatever came next was going to hurt.

“Consort.” Thorin sneered. “That rat is no husband of mine. In fact, he told me as much. I may be his husband, but he will never be mine. So leave! Traitor! You are henceforth banished from this mountain! GO!”

Bilbo didn’t need telling twice. Tears trapped behind his eyelids, Bilbo ran for all he was worth. Away from this place. Away from the dwarves calling after him. Away from the husband who didn’t want him. And he had been the fool who had expected something different.

War found them the next day, though not how any of them thought it would. Azog brought an orc army to their doorstep forcing the men, the elves, and the dwarves to work together. When all hope seemed to be lost, Thorin emerged from the mountain, once more of sound mind, leading the company on a charge against the orcs. He had been a vision, and when Azog attempted to cut him down on Ravenhill, Bilbo had thrown himself between them. The mithril worked its wonders to spare Bilbo and Thorin their lives, but cracked a couple of ribs in the process.

Honestly, Bilbo didn’t remember much about it, having received a head wound earlier. He remembered Thorin calling his name after he threw himself in front of Azog’s blade. He remembered someone carrying him back down the mountainside. He remembered Oin loudly calling him a fool of a hobbit as he wrapped tight bandages about his middle. But perhaps the thing he remembered most of all, was that he never saw hide nor hair of his husband as he lay in the healing tent staring down at the stone that had cost him everything.