Chtuluchilipie Chapter 4: Dwalin the Magical Cockblocker

Summary:

Dwalin is very good at cockblocking.

"So," Bilbo began hesitantly, placing down his book and looking over at Thorin. "Your brother came down to the cafe today."

Thorin sits at the other end of the couch, reading, deeply engrossed in the manuscript he was reading. Distracted, he glances up at Bilbo fleetingly with a mumbled "oh, yeah?"

Bilbo hums, clearing his throat, softly saying "yeah."

Thorin turns a page, annotating the piece, half mumbling to himself. There's a moment of silence. This doesn't bother Thorin, silence never has, but he can sense Bilbo's unease, and he realizes their conversation wasn't really finished.

"Well, what did he want?"

It takes Bilbo a second to respond. "Um, well originally he was looking for you. Said it was something important."

"I doubt it." Thorin snorts, and tries to go back to focusing on the piece, but his hearts not in it anymore. Bilbo had drug him out of workflow.

"Why?" Bilbo asks, sounding genuinely curious. Obviously, he doesn't know any better when it comes to Frerin, and the question, the entire scenario amuses him.

Thorin chuckles. "Because Frerin is an idiot who likes to distract me during work."Just like you, apparently. He thinks to himself, smiling and re-reading a sentence he grazed over.

"Yeah, I get that now. After he realized you weren't up here, he started pestering me." Bilbo pauses. "Asking about how far we'd gone."

That got Thorin's attention. He looks up fully, mildly amused, but mostly annoyed at Frerin's nosiness. "Oh? And what did you tell him?" Thorin works at keeping the edge out of his tone, he didn't want Bilbo to think he was annoyed with him.

Bilbo's blushing at this , but he visibly forces himself to continue, avoiding Thorin's gaze.

"Well, he specifically said "have you gotten into anything interesting with Thorin?"" Bilbo said, leering and imitating the deep timbers of Frerin's voice. He cleared his throat, and his large hazel eyes flickered back to Thorin. "And well, I was honest."

Thorin looks up at him, studying Bilbo for a moment, head tilted in consideration.He wants to ask what the "honesty" even was, but he's not sure how to phrase it, so he just ends up staring at Bilbo oddly.

Which worsens Bilbo's blush. "To be specific I told him, that while we hadn't done a lot of particularly interesting things, didn't mean I wasn't willing to." Bilbo is biting his lips as he says this, and he glances up at Thorin, nervous.

Thorin's eyebrows raise, and he catches the mild innuendo. He was not expecting that. A slow smile spreading across his lips, he places the manuscript on the table and leans forward. Putting his arm around Bilbo, he smirks and cooly asks, "and what do you consider interesting?"

His voice is deeper at this part, huskier, latched with an inkling of desire. Bilbo's blush returns with a fiery vengeance, and the red brings a nice tone to his cheeks. Adorable. Thorin grins and chuckles.

"That's fine. I've got enough ideas of my own." He growls mischievously, grabbing Bilbo viciously by the waist, making him giggle.

Still smirking, Thorin settles Bilbo into his lap, and slowly presses his lips onto Bilbo's. The kiss is just as magical as all the ones prior, and Bilbo can't help but just melt into Thorin.

Bilbo's kisses are perfect. They held a certain sense of familiarity and intimacy, like that of old lovers who had kissed countless times before, but they also felt new and sparkly, like a magical first kiss that sent your head spinning and made your knees weaken. Thorin kisses Bilbo softly, as smoothly as possible, tasting the inside of his mouth, strangely similar to raspberry scones. Bilbo's hands come to rest on his shoulders, and Thorin buries his own in Bilbo's waist. Bilbo's hands move upwards into his hair, and Thorin sighs into the kiss, gasping as Bilbo nibbled on his lower lip.

Bilbo leaned further into the kiss, pressing himself fully against Thorin, who replied with a low moan and by burying his face in the curve of Bilbo's arched throat. Bilbo gasped, and Thorin chuckled, brushing his lips across Bilbo's exposed collarbone, licking the skin there.

"What?" He whispered, nibbling on Bilbo's earlobe.

Bilbo was panting for breath, clutching onto Thorin's back rather desperately. Thorin was begging to worry a bit. Frowning, he slowly leaned away, retracting his lips, a sound of surprise escaping him when Bilbo pulled him back in.

"No," he moaned. "Stay. Don't stop."

Thorin is frozen, and he examines Bilbo. "What's the matter?"

"Your beard," Bilbo panted, licking Thorin's neck, pulling the collar of his shirt to kiss his hot shoulder.

"What about it?"

"It drives me insane." Bilbo sighed, cradling Thorin's bearded cheeks.

Thorin smiled and he kissed Bilbo with vigor, pulling Bilbo into his lap, unable to contain his smile as the smaller man moaned into his mouth. He slid his hands up Bilbo's shirt, enjoying the feeling of the soft warm skin there, luxuriating in this feeling, in this moment. He paused, smiling at Bilbo's annoyed sound of displeasure. He rested his forehead against Bilbo's, his dark blue eyes meeting a pair of bright hazel ones. "You," he whispered, against Bilbo lips, closing his eyes. "Drive me insane."

Bilbo kissed him roughly, and Thorin eagerly soaked him up. He tightened his arms around Bilbo's waist, and Bilbo's leg straddled across his hip, drawing them closer.

His heart was pounding, his mind was dazed, and he was utterly hopeless. Completely lost in the joy and glory that was Bilbo's mouth. Bilbo's soft sweet lips that Thorin gladly lapped up like nectar. Bilbo's hot flesh that he was offering only to Thorin. Bilbo's tongue, tasting and lapping over him. Bilbo's hands, claiming him and making their wishes known. Bilbo was being a bit more daring, slowly unbuttoning Thorin's shirt, tongue dancing across his skin, making him inhale in a sharp breath.

Bilbo pushed Thorin onto his back, looking flushed, aroused and determined. If the tightness in his own jeans was anything to go off of, he was equally as hard. Bilbo kissed Thorin's neck, biting the skin there, and Thorin moaned. Thorin's hands slid down to Bilbo's delicious rump, pulling him flush against Thorin's hard clothed cock. He rocked his hips up against Bilbo's, moaning as Bilbo nipped his ear. Bilbo pressed a hand between them, deft little fingers dangling past the fly of Thorin's jeans, just about to explore when-

Thorin's phone rings, rather loudly, shaking and rattling on the table, annoying him immediately. Panting, he looks up at Bilbo, who sighs and nods. "It could be important." He says, resting his head on Thorin's chest.

Thorin grabs it, not bothering to suppress his annoyance. "What do you want Dwalin?" He growls angrily, a growl that usually sent anyone running, but sadly his best friend was unfazed, used to Thorin's bark.

"Thorin! Have you gotten laid yet?!?" Dwalin practically screamed into the phone.

Thorin doesn't respond, and he just covers his face with his hands, and Bilbo chuckles lightly, burying his face in the crook of Thorin's shoulder.

"Oh." Dwalin says.

"Yeah." Thorin says back, hanging up, rolling his eyes and looking up at Bilbo.

"That was mean." He grins, hands still splayed on Thorin's partially exposed chest.

Thorin just smirks and pulls Bilbo in for another kiss, chuckling at Bilbo's giggles.