Love Letters Emsiecat

Summary:

Whoo, finally caught up!

This prompt is by bagginshieldhappiness : Bilbo keeps getting anonymous love letters during the quest and is 90% sure they're from Ori. Until he discovers they're from Thorin.

Chapter Text

Your eyes are lovelier than any gem hewn from the rock, and your smile shines with the radiance of the stars, the moon, and the setting sun.

It was a short note, clumsily executed but with a poets romantic flair, and had it not been specifically slipped under his bedroll Bilbo may have expected a mistake had been made.

However, he supposed that was still a possibility... Perhaps one of his companions had simply thought his bedroll was someone else's. Or else in a worse scenario, maybe he was being cruelly mocked.

No... the dwarves were fond of jokes and mischief, they enjoyed teasing one another especially within their family units. However, they had been quite polite with him thus far. Whether that was due to Gandalf's influence... a warning perhaps from the wizard not to bother him... or merely because they did not consider him part of the group yet; Bilbo had not faced any such interactions with the Company save for Bofur's initial mischievous comments regarding the dragon.

Regardless, they did not seem like the sort of people who would torment others callously.

As to the sender being mistaken over whom they had sent the note to, Bilbo decided that was unlikely as well. His Shire made bedroll was different enough from the dwarves' that if someone else had been the intended recipient, it was not likely that his bedroll would have been the one to be erroneously chosen.

That left only one possibility, and it was a conclusion that left Bilbo feeling quite flustered and unsure...

It seemed that he had an admirer.

But who?...

Bilbo snuggled down into his bedroll for the night, trying to be casual as he cast surreptitious glances about the campsite. If someone had left that note for him and meant the words seriously, surely they would be watching him and waiting for a reaction.

Nobody met his gaze, nor yet did any of his companions look overly suspicious or fidgety.

Most of them were arranged strategically around the campfire, the crackling flames casting warmth and light on each of them as they settled down for the night. Bofur, Bifur, and Bombur were bickering good-naturedly and paying him no mind, Fíli and Kíli were already snoring, trying to get as much sleep as possible before they were woken for the next watch, Dwalin sat with Balin poring over a map, Thorin was seated on a rock a short distance away keeping watch over his Company... Nobody paid him any notice, not one of them looked his way.

Very odd...

Deciding to put the note out of his mind, Bilbo looked it over one last time (the handwriting did look vaguely familiar he supposed, but he was too tired to remember from where), and tucked it into one of his backpacks' pockets before settling down and closing his eyes to sleep.

By the next morning, Bilbo had forgotten the note entirely; that was until Kíli rather brazenly questioned Bilbo about his love life and the embarrassment from the night before came flooding back.

"A husband or wife?" Bilbo echoed back to the young dwarf who had slung an arm about his shoulder almost making the hobbit stumble. Thankfully, Fíli had taken up position on his other side, preventing him from toppling over. "No, no I am a confirmed bachelor, no attachments here... besides why in the world would I up and join you lot if I had someone back home?"

"Hm, it isn't a strange thing to us." Fíli shrugged, puffing on his pipe as the pair frogmarched Bilbo along. "Glóin and Bombur both have wives and children and they've still joined us."

Well that ruled those two out at least...

"It's a good thing you're single though, Mister Boggins!" Kíli chirped and turned to Thorin who walked a few steps behind them. "Isn't it, uncle?"

"Kíli, leave the hobbit be," Thorin rumbled quietly and shot his nephew a warning look.

Wait! Bilbo turned his head quickly to look at Kíli who was grinning close to his face; eyes alight with interest.

Surely not!

Out of all the dwarves, Kíli had been the most openly friendly with him, trying to pull him into any conversation he could.

Could Thorin's young nephew really have designs on him? He certainly hoped not! Kíli was a lovely lad of course, but Balin had explained in passing that Fíli and Kíli were two of the youngest in their group. Despite the fact they were a good couple of decades older than Bilbo in years, by dwarven standards they were still barely out of their tweens, and Bilbo was middle aged! The idea simply did not sit right with him.

Bilbo fretted over the possibility up until that night when he received another note.

If I could find the words, I would speak with you more often. I would like to know you better if you would but allow it and I had the courage.

Not at all romantic like last night's note... but it was a sweet confession all the same. Whoever his admirer was, they were the shy sort.

Well, he thought with a relieved sigh. That firmly ruled out Fíli and Kíli then, as did it rule out Bofur and Nori.

The four of them were rambunctious and chatty, not the least bit shy.

He had been suspicious of Bofur's feelings towards him as well as Kíli's until now. The miner seemed to be an incorrigible flirt. However, with this note, he was firmly put out of the picture, and Bilbo surmised his salacious winks and generous hugs were simply part of his personality. Bofur did seem to act that way with most of the Company anyway.

This too was a relief. Bilbo was fond of Bofur, but the camaraderie he felt towards the moustached dwarf was nothing more than a kind of brotherly affection and he would so hate to have to reject him and possibly lose what was quickly becoming a fast friendship.

Running his forefinger gently over the inked words, Bilbo frowned as he tried to puzzle out who could have written it.

"Master Baggins." Thorin's voice, low and commanding, startled him from his reverie and Bilbo looked up at the dwarf stood over him from his seat on the floor. Bilbo crumpled the note and shoved it in his pocket as Thorin raised a curious brow. "It is late and I suggest you get some sleep."

"Ah, right... yes, of course." Unaccountably grateful that Thorin had not remarked on his note, for given his position he had to have seen what was written there, Bilbo quickly laid down and pulled his blanket up over his head to hide his flushed face.

Tomorrow, he would think more on this tomorrow.

More notes appeared in the following days, endearing words and kind compliments which left Bilbo feeling alarmingly charmed. It may be entirely possible he was beginning to feel fondness for his mysterious letter writer.

Rather unfortunate given that they were all on a perilous quest to face a dragon!

After the unfortunate incident with the trolls, Bilbo was certain his admirer might either be put off given his clumsy handling of the situation, or else see how unwise it could be in trying to court whilst facing life-threatening situations.

Somehow, the idea left Bilbo feeling forlorn despite him knowing it was probably for the best.

That night he found another note tucked under his pillow in Rivendell, and unwittingly, his heart soared.

Please do not despair, you are important to me and your actions with the trolls were admirable no matter what was said to the contrary.

"You are a love-sick fool, Bilbo Baggins, and this will only end in tears," he muttered to himself as he pressed his lips to the note before tucking it safely away.

Bilbo used the respite in Rivendell to try to narrow down the possibilities further. If only his note writer was brave enough to come forth... but no, Bilbo thought with fond exasperation, he had to do all the work to find out who it was.

Balin, Dori, and Óin were not the ones. Even if the vast age difference were not a factor, Óin had already loved and lost, and he had since found out that dwarves loved but once (a rather startling prospect given that one of them was his secret admirer, but Bilbo tried not to let it faze him). As for Balin and Dori, their interactions with him were of the fatherly kind; Balin was wise and becoming a good friend and mentor to Bilbo, and Dori was prone to mothering him. However, neither of them seemed to imply anything from their actions other than this. Besides which, he had seen both of their handwriting, and it was nothing like his admirers'.

Bifur was then quickly ruled out when Bilbo found out the dwarf could neither speak nor write in anything but Khuzdûl.

Gandalf... Bilbo laughed outright at the very notion. The wizard was a family friend, older than the hills surrounding Bag End, and far too blunt to bother with such a frivolous thing as love letters.

So that left... Dwalin, Thorin, and Ori.

Thorin was quite open in his dismissal of Bilbo's presence in the Company. He mistrusted the hobbit and had barely spoken two sentences to him since they left the Shire.

Dwalin, though he was certain the dwarf hid a shy and romantic heart behind all that gruff and bluster, followed firmly in Thorin's footsteps of seeming to dislike Bilbo on sight. Well... maybe dislike was too strong a word, but Dwalin certainly did not seem to think Bilbo belonged with them, so the idea he might be harbouring a secret attraction for him was rather amusing.

Then that meant... Bilbo looked over quickly at the young scribe who was busy scribbling in his book. Apparently feeling someone's gaze on him, Ori looked up from his work and met Bilbo's gaze with a warm, shy smile before he returned to his book.

Oh dear...

This was even worse than Kíli!

Ori was the youngest; Dori had told him as much.

Unfortunately though, the idea fit too well for it to be wrong: Shy, quiet Ori, who wrote more than he spoke. A gentle soul with a romantic streak a league wide, a propensity for poetic language when he put his mind to it, and a friendly nature.

Oh dear, oh dear... Ori liked him!?

Excusing himself from the Company for a few moments, Bilbo hid himself behind one of the pillars and tried not to have some kind of panic attack.

"Oh bother," Bilbo mumbled and buried his face in his hands, ears heating up with the force of his blush. "Whatever am I going to do now?"

Ori was very sweet, and Bilbo did like him immensely, but he did not feel any romantic attraction to the dwarf, even if everyone was willing to overlook their difference in emotional and mental maturity.

True, Bilbo had quite fallen in love with the letters that had been written to him, but up until now, it had been a faceless and nameless love. Someone who he had developed feelings for simply for their kindness and way with words.

The fact that it was Ori very much put paid to any previous admiration for the letters that he had felt.

Bilbo groaned quietly and piteously. He was going to have to reject Ori and he felt so very guilty about it, poor thing.

"Please don't let Dori try and murder me for this," Bilbo whimpered beseechingly to any higher power that might deign to listen to the pleas of a troubled hobbit.

Bilbo was unfortunately thwarted in his attempts to talk to Ori, for that evening they left Rivendell and Bilbo simply could not speak to the young dwarf privately at any point thereafter.

He lamented his cursed luck all the way through the Misty Mountains, and felt a sad tug at his heart with the one or two new notes he received before everything went horribly wrong with the stone giants. Poor Ori, he did hope that maybe Ori would somehow shirk dwarven expectation and learn to love another after this. After all, Bilbo was a hobbit... maybe the 'one love' rule did not count of the love was a different race?

Of course, after the stone giants there was little time to think of anything. Goblins, the creature Gollum, and the delightful arrival of Azog drove all thoughts of love and rejection from Bilbo's frazzled and frightened mind.

It was only after, as he was wrapped in Thorin's arms upon the Carrock that Bilbo felt a twinge of heartache once more.

Over the weeks, the admiration he had felt for the dwarf king had developed into something more, and in his wildest dreams Bilbo had imagined that maybe Thorin would learn to like him at very least. Now he had the dwarf king's friendship though, Bilbo realised that it might not be enough, and he sighed wistfully that evening as he thought of the love notes. How might he feel if Thorin someday wrote something like that to him?

Bilbo turned over in his bedroll and hid his face from view.

He would quite like it actually.

Beorn's home was a lovely respite from the awful circumstances they had faced since leaving Rivendell, and it was here that Bilbo finally had the chance to speak with Ori.

He found the young dwarf sketching in Beorn's garden, and feeling very reluctant, Bilbo settled himself awkwardly down beside the scribe.

"Oh, hullo, Bilbo." Ori grinned at him and Bilbo suddenly felt as if he were a villain in a fairytale.

"Ah, yes, hello, Ori... um I was wondering if I might speak with you?"

"Of course." Ori's grin widened and Bilbo wondered if one of Beorn's bees would be kind enough to sting him so that poor Ori's heart would be avenged.

"I- I wanted to discuss these notes with you." Bilbo pulled the only note he had managed to save from their adventures from his jacket pocket.

Without further ado, Bilbo handed the crumpled, stained paper to the young dwarf, and waited for recognition to steal over his face. It was the second note Bilbo had received, the one that read: If I could find the words, I would speak with you more often. I would like to know you better if you would but allow it and I had the courage.

Ori's brow furrowed as he looked the note over, and something like a warning bell tolled in Bilbo's mind.

"What about it, Bilbo? I am afraid I'll have to admit to some confusion here... why are you showing me a note Thorin has written? It's not making any sense to me."

Bilbo's voice was nothing more than a squeak. "W-what?"

"The note, if you were wondering whose it was, I'm guessing that's what you wanted to know, right? That would be our leader's handwriting." Ori nodded resolutely.

"No, no no, it's yours!"

Ori laughed then, shaking his head at Bilbo's wide-eyed and slack jawed expression. "I think I know my own handwriting, Bilbo. This, on the other hand is Thorin's. If you still have your contract, you should compare it. It's his note you've got here, for certain."

Bilbo attempted to reply but only managed to open and close his mouth several times like a fish out of water.

Ori laughed again and patted Bilbo's arm fondly. "Why do you look so shocked?... I'm curious to know what in the world Thorin is writing about here though..."

"Me!" Bilbo's hands slapped over his mouth and his eyes bugged in mortification as he realised he had spoken aloud.

Slow, dawning realisation rose on Ori's face and he had to clamp his hands to his own mouth to stifle a fit of giggles. "O-oh! Oh dear... he wrote you a note, confessing that he wished to know you better-" Here Ori lost control on his composure and chortled happily, whilst Bilbo hid his face in his hands. "Oh Bilbo, we had suspected he might be fond of you, but never- oh! Oh wait you thought that I wrote-"

Bilbo groaned and fervently wished the ground might swallow him up. "It- it seemed to fit, I thought you were the letter writer and-"

"And you were coming to-?" Ori looked rather worried.

"To try and let you down gently..."

"Oh, thank goodness for that! I'm sorry I mean no offence, Bilbo, but you're not really my type," Ori snickered.

"None taken." Bilbo felt giddy with relief on this account, but on the other hand-

"Oh my- Thorin has... he's the one who-"

"Indeed." Ori all at once adopted a look so friendly, consoling, and wise, that Bilbo was surprisingly put in mind of Balin for a moment. "So, how do you feel about this?"

"Happy." The question was a shockingly easy one to answer and Bilbo looked rather wild eyed as this revelation struck him. "I- I've grown to care for him a lot and..."

Ori gave the hobbit a playful nudge. "Then go and tell him, for goodness sake! We've all been wondering how long it will take you both to realise it!"

"You what!?" The squeaky quality was back in Bilbo's voice and Ori laughed again.

"It's been obvious to the Company for a long time now. I believe there might have been wagers made over when it would finally happen."

Bilbo had a sickening feeling he might pass out for a moment and took a few good deep breaths before the scenery stopped spinning. "You- please don't..."

"Bilbo, they won't hear a word of this from me." Ori smiled kindly. "This is between you and Thorin... but please, for all our sakes go and find him to sort this out."

"Right." Bilbo nodded resolutely and an odd sense of calm settled over him, much as it had before he had recklessly thrown himself at Azog and his followers. "Right... I'll just go and-"

"Yes, yes, shoo." Ori grinned and waved the hobbit off before turning back to his drawing.

Standing, Bilbo took another few calming breaths before he marched off to find the dwarf king.

Thorin was muttering darkly as he tried in vain to remove the grime from one of his few shirts in a nearby stream when Bilbo finally found him.

Shifting uneasily from foot to foot, the hobbit was wondering how best to broach the subject when Thorin looked up and noticed him, stilling his movements and clearing his throat awkwardly before speaking.

"Master Baggins, it's good to see you."

"And you... Thorin I- there's something I think we should discuss." Deciding not to bother beating around the bush, and unable to think of anything else to say lest his voice take on the pitch of a mouse once more, Bilbo simply held out the note to the dwarf king and awaited his reaction.

The recognition was instantaneous and Thorin swallowed thickly, cheeks flushing as he suddenly found the ruined shirt in his hand to be the height of interest once more.

"I am sorry I did not give you the courtesy of speaking with you directly- I- ... I fully understand you cannot accept my affections, and after the way I have treated you since the beginning of our journey you have every right to-"

"You know you dwarves do so love to jump to conclusions." Somehow knowing Thorin felt just as awkward as he did made Bilbo feel a lot better and just a little bolder.

Thorin looked up, startled as Bilbo came closer to settle himself on the grass beside him.

"Will you at least give me the benefit of speaking for myself before you guess what I'm about to say?"

Thorin nodded mutely, shame faced and so endearingly shy that Bilbo felt a gentle smile curl his lips unbidden. He looked as if Bilbo was about to tell him some horrifically sad news, and the expression tugged at the hobbit's heartstrings.

"I will admit that at first you were rather... rude, or you seemed rude at least. However, I have to say I have admired you since the beginning of our journey. You're brave, honourable, and a genuinely kind and good person, even if you did seem to dislike me-"

"I don't dislike- surely you must see-"

"Let me finish," Bilbo murmured, voice kind and somewhat amused as he took Thorin's hand in his, intertwining their fingers and stroking his thumb over the dwarf's knuckles. "You have to admit, that it would seem as if you disliked me in the beginning from the way you acted... but I think maybe you just have a difficult time expressing yourself."

Thorin nodded in agreement, unwilling to interrupt again, which caused Bilbo to grin. Underneath that awkwardness, this dwarf was probably the sweetest creature Bilbo had ever met. The notes more than proved it.

"I really loved the notes," Bilbo murmured quietly, shuffling closer to Thorin. "I tried to keep them, but unfortunately most were lost in the Goblin Tunnels, I did save this one though."

"I- I find it difficult to speak with those I'm not already well acquainted with, I was not sure how to approach you, and they seemed like the best alternative."

Bilbo's heart fluttered at the admission and he surprised himself with his own boldness when he brought Thorin's hand to his lips to graze a gentle kiss to his knuckles. "They were very sweet, and despite our slightly... rocky start, I would be very happy to accept your affections, Thorin."

"You would?" There was an element of disbelief in the dwarf's voice, which was both endearing and slightly heart breaking. He really thought Bilbo would reject him?

"And return them in full." Bilbo smiled, leaning in to press his forehead to the dwarf's own. If he remembered correctly, it was a gesture of affection amongst their race-

Thorin dropped his shirt and wrapped his arms around Bilbo, pulling him as close as he was able. "You really want-?"

"Yes, you daft, thing, but I would like for us to work on you actually talking to me in the future... though I have to admit I would quite like some more notes to replace the ones I lost, they were very-"

Lips pressed to his own prevented Bilbo from finishing that line of thought, and even though the hobbit wondered if Thorin quite understood what talking entailed, he was more than happy to compromise this way.

Returning the kiss enthusiastically as he was swept into Thorin's arms and settled on his lap, Bilbo decided that talking could probably wait until later.

Years had passed since that moment, and Thorin had more than made up for his awkward first impressions, Bilbo thought affectionately.

The hobbit had a small chest full of little love notes courtesy of his now husband, and thankfully he and Thorin were far better at communicating than they had been in the beginning. In fact, there were those who often commented that their understanding of one another bordered on uncanny.

It was a good thing, Bilbo mused as he greeted the now crowned king of Erebor with a kiss. Love notes were entirely wonderful things, but it was far better to understand one another in more than one aspect.