Little Merman part 3

Part 3 : 

Very soon afterwards, Lu Cang finally understood what's the meaning to become a member of Inner Palace Guards. His main job was to guard Jing around the clock. And seemingly he had run out of luck, he was on the night watch. Guarding the Emperor while he was visiting his concubines. Staying out in the open, exposed to the night weather while standing on guard, these trivial matters were nothing for Lu Cang. He was used to a more severe weather of the sea after all. What made him frowned all the time was, his sharp sense of hearing often caught Jing's flirting voice and the coquette replies from the concubines, not to mention the spilling moans and low groans. Normal people wouldn't be able to hear them, but to Lu Cang, they were loud and clear.

And the only way to obstruct annoying voices from reaching his ears, was to dive deep in the water. It was on his third day on his duty when he accidentally found an extremely luxurious large pond inside a jaded door building. The water was crystal clear, there was no roof on the building, only four exquisitely carved marbles as walls to obstruct the pond from the eyes of the public. The walls were ridiculously high, but they seemed to be sturdy and safe. From the pool, when he looked up, starry skies would fill his eyes. Lu Cang felt as if he had returned to the sea when he looked up at the sky.

Floating and diving for countless times, since he came to the land, this was the first time he could feel at ease.

On his first day staying in the Forbidden City, he learned that Jing was no longer the Crown Prince. He was the Emperor now. He ascended the throne barely a year. When he returned from his leisure voyage, the previous Emperor suddenly critically fell ill and passed away not long after that.

On his second day, he knew from his fellow guards about the numerous concubines that the Emperor had. Even if there was some strange feeling stabbing his heart, in the end, he also learned that it was very normal for a human Emperor to possess many lovers at the same time, and the lovers must share the Emperor's affection. This kind of practice was unheard of in their realm. There was only one mate for them in all of their lifetime. Humans were such greedy creatures after all. He knew that he should forget about Jing and try to get back his Bead of Life as soon as possible so that he could leave this place, a place where he didn't belong.

After finding this pond, everytime he and several members of the guards escorted Jing to his Concubine's Palace, right after Jing entered the room, Lu Cang would make various reasons to slip away from his post and returned just before Jing came out. Fortunately, his fellow guards never seemed to mind him at all, they just let him leave his post as he pleased.

Tonight was the second fullmoon since he stayed at this Palace. He had tried a thousand and one way to take back his Bead, but to no avail. Let alone touching a strand of his hair, Lu Cang didn't even have the chance to stand closer than ten steps to Jing.

For some reasons, Lu Cang could feel that his remaining time was definitely less than a year. His throbbing heart was the most obvious evident. Everytime he looked at Jing, his heart would be pricked by thousand needles. Hurt to the point of bleeding. Yet, his eyes couldn't help but drift to Jing and glance at him from time to time, only to find that Jing was not looking at him at all, just regarded Lu Cang as mere thin air.

Just like Ding Peng had told him, Jing didn't even remember that he had saved him. He had hoped that Ding Peng was mistaken and what Ding Peng told him was only rumors. However, everytime he looked at Jing, hoping that he would look back, or maybe spare a glance at him, everytime he was defeated by his own expectation. Jing, did not even care to spare him a sideway glance, let alone look back at him. He knew then that Ding Peng had spoken the truth all along.

Recalling all these things, Lu Cang's heart was tightening as if being squeezed from inside. Subconsciously, he put his hand on his chest, as if by doing this, he could alleviate the pain even a little.

Lu Cang was too occupied by his own thoughts, also whenever he swam in the water, he seemingly forgot about his surrounding, that he didn't notice there was someone else standing by the side of the pool watching him float in the water with such curious eyes.

At the time when he finally realized it, his pair of bright eyes collided with a pair of beautiful like the starry sky's eyes. Like that time, in the quiet before the storm night, the first time he saw such bottomless dark eyes, as if his soul was drowned in that boundless darkness.

Surprised, out of reflex, he leaped to dive in, making a big splash with his feet. The water splashed to all sides, and some of it splashed onto Jing's face. The coldness of the water also called Jing back from his in-trance like state.

This place was of course built under Jing's order. After returning from the voyage, for some unknown reasons even to Jing himself, Jing had always craved for water. The strong urge to be in the water had puzzled him to no end, yet he couldn't fight his impulse to soak himself in the water. ---Jing didn't know that it was the calling of the Bead inside his body. Lu Cang's Bead of Life of course would cause him to crave for water since Lu Cang was a creature from the realm of water.

A peculiar feeling was tingling in his heart when he saw Lu Cang floating in the water like it was his second nature to be in the water. Even his diving movement was elegant, it was as if Lu Cang was......was....... was a fish. But it was of course impossible. No matter how he looked at him, Lu Cang was a man through and through.

Casually took off his clothes, Jing's perfect suet body was shown without any obstruction before Lu Cang's eyes. Jing's fair skin appeared to be translucent under the moonlight. Slowly, he descended into the water.

"What is your name?" Lu Cang was still hiding in the depth of the water, at the other side of the pool, but Jing was certain that he would be able to hear him. And he was right, he could see the slowly coming to the surface diving man. ---although he had lost his ability to breathe in the water, Lu Cang could still hold his breath longer than any normal human beings.

Knowing it was futile to stay longer in the water, Lu Cang slowly came to the surface. "Lu Cang."

"Do you know that, for the sole crime of leaving your post while you are on duty is already enough to make your head roll on the ground? Sneaking into the Imperial Bath and using the Imperial Bath without permission, maybe pulling you apart with four horses could be counted as the lightest punishment."

Lu Cang didn't say anything. Didn't move. Only stared at Jing with thousand emotions mixed together to become a complicated feeling.

"Not afraid? Should I praise you for your braveness or foolishness?" Lu Cang still didn't react to his words. For Jing, this was the first time someone wasn't afraid of him. Instead of being angry, he was highly amused. "Where do you come from?"

"Hangzhou." This was the first place that came to Lu Cang's mind since this was the place where he stepped on for the very first time ever since he got his human feet.

"Why do you come to Capital?"

"I come to retrieve my lost item. Someone took it by accident a year ago. That someone promised to return it to me if I come. That item is extremely important for me. Without it, I will die."

Lu Cang was surprised that Jing was smiling so beautifully at him. "I see. An item as important as your life. Whoever has that item, basically means they own your life."

Jing at this moment, was exactly the same as Jing at that shore a year ago. Smiling so beautifully, playfully while saying an extremely selfish remarks.

Without his awareness, Lu Cang let out a smile. This heavenly being indeed was still the same Jing. Maybe he could remember if Lu Cang just told him the fact.

"Come here." It was not a request, but an order for Lu Cang.

Despite losing his tail, Lu Cang was still a water creature, in no time, he had swum to Jing's front. Even Jing himself was surprised to see how swiftly and how elegantly he swam. The surface of the water didn't even make a ripple when he swam in the depth of the pool. Truly like a fish.

"You like this place?"

"Only this pool." Lu Cang's blunt answer made Jing softly laugh.

"Want to stay here?" Even if he didn't want to, he was already trapped in this Palace. He wouldn't be able to leave without Jing's permission. Secretly thought to himself, Jing was almost burst out in laughter when he saw the hesitation on Lu Cang's eyes, like he was seriously considering Jing's reckless offer.

Shaking his head, Lu Cang honestly admitted : "I don't have the leisure of time. My time is limited. I must retrieve my item as soon as possible."

"What is that item? Maybe I can help you to look for it."

"I can't tell." These words escaped from Lu Cang's mouth without his control. Lu Cang indeed tried to tell Jing about his Bead of Life, but some mysterious force prevented him from saying so.

"How long is your time limit?"

"I also don't know. But it is less than a year."

"After that?"

Lu Cang didn't asnwer, instead, he scooped up the water then slowly let them spill from his hands until there was nothing left on his palms. Although he couldn't fully understand what Lu Cang meant by doing that, Jing roughly got the idea, Lu Cang simply meant that he would die or something like that.

"I assume that the person who took your item is in the Palace?" Lu Cang nodded. "How do you get the item back?"

"The same way when I accidentally gave it to him." Lu Cang pointed at his mouth. Seemed like for some casual gesture, the curse didn't prevent them from gesturing as long as it was not for the intention of revealing their true identity.

As someone as bright as Jing, naturally he would understand at once what Lu Cang meant to say. Imagining Lu Cang had to kiss another person, he couldn't help but be extremely annoyed. Before Lu Cang could react, he had pulled Lu Cang's long hair and printed his soft lips on Lu Cang's. For the reason he was caught off guard, Lu Cang was about to scream out of shock, and that moment was meticulously used by Jing to strecth in his tongue and roamed inside Lu Cang's mouth.

What a strange sensation.

Jing was sure that it was the first time he kissed Lu Cang, yet, why did the taste of his mouth feel so familiar? It was as if he had kissed him for a long while before. A slight salty but fresh taste, like the scent of the sea.

If Lu Cang was in his clear mind, he would realize that this was the perfect moment to retrieve his Bead, unfortunately, Lu Cang at this moment lost himself in Jing's intimate kiss, without his awareness, he had indulged himself in Jing's gentle caress.

"Who on earth are you? I know you, don't I?"

Did Jing finally remember him? In his excitement, Lu Cang wanted to tell Jing about their first encounter.

"I......I......I......" Trying hard, as much as Lu Cang wanted to tell him, every time he tried, his words would choked in his throat. No matter how hard he tried, the words refused to escape from his mouth.

'......you absolutely can't tell the human about your real identity. Even if you wanted to, you will never be able to.'

That's right. The curse would prevent him from stating the truth about himself.

Finally Lu Cang gave up, he only looked at Jing with his pair of melancholy eyes. Then he silently and quickly walked out of the Imperial Bath while Jing just stared at him seeing him go.

------

From that time onwards, Jing seemed to be easily agitated. Without any particular reason, he would fly in rage and punished many innocent eunuchs and guards.

Nobody could guess why the usually cold and composed Emperor could be in such strange mood. Nobody but Jing himself knew about it. Deep in his heart, he felt that Lu Cang's lost item had something to do with him, but he couldn't remember anything. This kind of feeling was the first for him.

Jing had always been a perfect Prince and now a flawless Emperor. The things he wanted to know, he would get the information without fail. Anyone he wanted, whether it was a man or a woman, they would succumb to him without doubt.

But why this simple matter, no matter how hard he tried to remember, not even a shred or a fragment of memory he could recall. With Lu Cang's outstanding appearance, there was no way Jing would forget about him if they had met before. If they had never met before, then why did that pair of eyes felt so familiar? Those eyes were telling Jing that the person he was looking for was indeed Jing. The important item he lost, what was that item? Also when he kissed Lu Cang, his taste was so familiar and enticing. He knew he had tasted Lu Cang before. Yet, how could he not remember anything about Lu Cang at all.

While all of these thoughts were swirling like a messy thread in his mind, Jing was unaware that the door of his study was opened. A sturdy man, with slow but steady steps was treading to the Dragon's table, and kneeling before delivering his respectful greeting.

"Long live Your Majesty." The voice was solemn, but it filled with undescribable amount of dignity.

"Uncle Yong Yi." All of a sudden, Jing's gloomy expression brightened up upon the sight of this man. Xuan Yuan Yong Yi, his most favorite Uncle, his secret crush, appeared before him after almost a year. He left without saying goodbye right after Jing's coronation.

"Where have you been? I have been searching all over the country for you." Jing literally jumped from his couch and approached Yong Yi. When his eyes met with Yong Yi's eyes, he finally realized it......

That's right. Lu Cang's eyes were very similar with Uncle Yong Yi's. The eyes that constantly shone with such melancholy, yet unshakable and stubborn. No wonder he felt the sense of familiarity.

Smiling to himself, Jing seemingly had found the root of his trouble.

The matter was actually very simple. Jing, in his extreme longing for Yong Yi, had mistaken Lu Cang to be his beloved Uncle only becaused their eyes had the same kind of light.

As if a big lump of stone had been lifted from his heart, Jing smiled so beautifully.

"No. It doesn't matter where you have been, most important is now you have come home. Come, Xi Zhen also misses you a lot." Xi Zhen was Yong Yi's only daughter. Her mother had passed away several years ago due to her poor health after giving birth to Xi Zhen.

"Xi Zhen, is she doing well?" Hearing Xi Zhen's name, Yong Yi's eyes brightened up so brilliantly.

That's right. This kind of brilliant spark was what fascinated Jing the most. No wonder he was also mistakenly fascinated by Lu Cang's pair of glistening like black gem eyes.

"Extremely well. I have taken her in as my concubine so she wouldn't feel lonely in your empty palace."

"You don't blame me?" Contrary to Jing's happy tone, Yong Yi's voice seemed like heavier with guilty conscience. His manner of speaking was irritatingly irresolute. Jing disliked this kind of hesitating tone, his brows were slightly twitching.

"I did. I hated you when you disappeared without saying anything. But the State's matter kept me occupied and I didn't have the time to hunt you down." Saying this with a beautiful smile gracing his lips, but the cold gleam in his eyes showed how serious he was.

Knowing Jing since he was a baby, of course Yong Yi understood Jing the most. He knew Jing meant every words he said. A cold chill crawled from his spine to his nape, causing him to shudder involuntarily.

Now that his most beloved person had returned to his side, Jing never went for his Imperial visitations to his concubines anymore. He spent most of his time chatting with his uncle. Catching up for the year they spent separately.

Standing on guard near the pavilion where Jing and Yong Yi chatted happily, Lu Cang could clearly hear their conversation. Talking about many past events that Lu Cang didn't know about. Chatting about the Jing Lu Cang never knew. Upon this heartwarming conversation, Lu Cang felt both amused and saddened. Amused for knowing about Jing's past, saddened to realize that he was not involved in any of Jing's past, not even in his future.

These realizations had made Lu Cang felt dejected and the urge to get into the water was strengthened. But what to do, he was still on duty, and since he was standing at the place where Jing could clearly see him, he couldn't slip away from his post like before. He must endure the heavy as if being pressed by a mountain feeling while listening to their happy chat. Jing's tone was also so cheerful. Unlike his cold tone whenever he spoke to Lu Cang.

And since Yong Yi returned, Jing had never even looked at him, not even a glance. All of Jing's line of vision was only filled with Yong Yi. All of this scene, when fell into Lu Cang's eyes, his heart was beating so hard as if it was pounding, trying to escape his ribcage. Every beat hurt, painful, like being stabbed with a blunt knife - it didn't kill you immediately, but the pain it caused was more dreadful than being dead itself.

Holding his beating painfully heart while looking up to the fullmoon, Lu Cang anxiously counted. It was the forth fullmoon since he came to dry land, the realm of humans. How long was his remaining time? Three months? Two months? Maybe even less?

Truthfully, Lu Cang could feel that his time was not that long anymore. His body had gradually started to degrade. He sweat a lot even when it was not hot at all. Like now, the weather could be said as pleasant if not cold, some of the guards even had to hide their sneezes being out in this cold weather. Yet, Lu Cang was sweating profusely. The sweat was dripping from his forehead to his cheek. His face was white as paper.

The guard who stood by his side noticed his peculiar condition and asked in a soft anxious tone if he was unwell. It was not only Lu Cang's condition that made him worry, a small blunder from any one of them could affect the whole team. They could be punished altogether.

Before he had the chance to answer him, Lu Cang felt like he was surrounded by a thick black quilt, wrapping him into a world of silence.

With a loud tumbling sound, Lu Cang collapsed to the ground.

Of course this kind of situation would attract Jing's attention. Upon seeing it was Lu Cang who had tumbled, his body reacted before his mind. In a blink of an eye, he already stood by Lu Cang's side. Without uttering any words, he lifted Lu Cang's body from the ground, and as if knew what he should do, instinctively he brought Lu Cang to the direction of his private pool. He didn't even care for the eyes of the guards who looked at him with their gaping mouths, or the questioning eyes of his Uncle Yong Yi. All of his senses now were focused solely on the seemingly in pain Lu Cang despite being unconscious. For some unknown reasons, his heart throbbed painfully as if he was experencing the same kind of pain as Lu Cang.

Upon arriving at the pool, he just threw Lu Cang into the pool without taking off his guard's heavy uniform. He was tempted to jump into the pool as well but stopped himself and waited anxiously by the pool for Lu Cang to resurface.

As expected, after sinking for a while, Lu Cang truly began to swim freely in the water. His pallid face also regained its color, as if by soaking in the water he could replenish his life force. Jing was watching from the pool side with mixed feelings. Only now he could clearly observe Lu Cang's swimming style. Lu Cang didn't use his arms to move in the water like normal people, instead, he was moving them like a fish moving its fin. Yet, the swimming speed was faster than any human. The reason why he didn't make any ripple on the surface was also his unusual swimming style. Instead of splashing with his feet, he was moving them exactly the same as how a fish moved its tail. How curious.

When he saw Lu Cang opened his eyes and stared at him from the water, a strong feeling of something like this had happened before once again filled Jing's heart. But he quickly brushed it off by convincing himself that it was only his own delusion.

"How do you feel now?"

An icy cold tone. Completely different from the tone he used with his uncle. Lu Cang felt his heart hurt as if being stabbed again upon this thought.

Nodding his head, Lu Cang quickly dived to hide his emotion from Jing's eyes.

Very soon, he would lose his form and become one with the water. Although Jing couldn't remember him as the merman who had saved his life, at the very least, Jing would remember him as a guard named Lu Cang. Merely this thought, a weird kind of peaceful sensation caused Lu Cang to smile to himself.

"......fish."

Jing was muttering to himself, but Lu Cang of course could hear him. In a speed of lightning, he swam to Jing. His eyes were brimming with such happiness.

"You remember?"

Upon this question, Jing frowned. "Remember what?"

"Just now you said......"

"I said, you really do love water, like a fish." The expectation very soon changed into disappointment, then became a layer of sadness. The rapid changes in Lu Cang's eyes didn't escape Jing's eyes. It was the same as the first time when they met, in that selection stage.

It was annoying. Jing hated this kind of unexplainable feeling the most. The only way to discard such irritation was to remove the source himself. It had always been Jing's principal to maintain his peaceful life.

"Lu Cang. You can go back to your hometown. I allow you to go back. No, I want you to go away!" Hearing Jing saying this in such light manner, Lu Cang was devastated. The pang in his heart was getting more and more painful.

Fixing his eyes upon the unrivalled beauty in front of him, all of his hidden desire floated up in his heart. The real reason for him not taking action for such a long time, even when he could just forcibly take back his Bead, the truth was Lu Cang had been trying to avoid admitting that he had fallen for this beautiful human. After saving him from drowning, Lu Cang actually could just take back his Bead without the need to politely ask for it, but he didn't do it because he wanted to have a reason to see this beauty again. Coming to the Capital under the pretext to retrieve his Bead, even after the Goddess of Fortune had exhausted all of her power to create various opportunity for Lu Cang to reclaim his Bead from Jing, Lu Cang still delayed his action, because deep in his heart, he wanted to be with Jing for as long as he could. Even if it was only standing on guard to watch him flirt with his many lovers. Even if he had to endure the stabbing pain in his heart, whenever he saw Jing smiling so happily at his Uncle, there was a part of his heart that would smile along with Jing.

But his time in this mortal world was running out, moreover, Jing definitely couldn't remember him. Making a wry smile, Lu Cang mocked himself. So what if Jing could remember him? It was not like Jing would reciprocate his feeling. Jing already had his beloved person. For Jing, Lu Cang was not more than a guard who piqued a little of his interest.

"You are right. Even if I stay longer in this place, I still wouldn't be able to retrieve my item. It is better if I become one with that beautiful lake." After all, Lu Cang himself was not sure whether he could be in this human form until the next fullmoon. Tonight might be the last fullmoon he could see.

The fullmoon was so bright and round, like a pearl.

Recalling about the pearls, Lu Cang searched in his clothes and fished out a simple looking box. There were still several pearls inside. Taking one out, Lu Cang stretched his hand towards Jing.

"Take this. For you. A memento from homeland." Jing wordlessly accepted the gift from Lu Cang.

For an Emperor, this kind of pearl of course had no value at all. After all, Jing had all kind of treasures in his possession. But Lu Cang really wanted him to remember the current him, even if he had forgotten about their first meeting, as long as he could remember the present Lu Cang, Lu Cang felt that his coming to the Capital was not in vain at all, despite his failure in retrieving his crucial Bead.

Illuminated by the moonlight, the pearl was shining with a brilliant silver color. Even among the national treasures, Jing had never seen such beautiful pearl before.

From the corner of his eyes, he watched Lu Cang climbing out of the pool, without minding to dry his wet body. Just like that, he walked out of the luxurious bath house, disappearing behind the jade door, leaving behind a trail of dripping water. Never to appear before Jing anymore.

Obviously, Jing should be happy that he had successfully gotten rid of the source of his troubled feelings, but what with this hollow feeling in his heart?

A strong urge to chase Lu Cang seized Jing's heart. With all his might, he suppressed that urge and just stood there until he could calm himself. When he stepped out of the bath, in front of the door, there was only a set of wet guard's uniform scattered on the ground. Lu Cang already vanished into the dark of the night, no where to be seen.