Champagne Problems

Noah

The air was still and quiet in the early morning hours as I sat on Alex's bed. Her room sat with everything in place as it always was, her closet mostly empty now. I freaked out when I saw how empty it was, I then scanned the room for her personal and valuable items. I breathed a sigh of relief when I found the glass jewelry box, a journal, and her favorite perfume. She's not gone, not forever. She just needs time and space. It hurts like hell to give that to her, but I'd do anything for her, I just have to push through, work on the album like she said.

We were on a small break, Nick left for home this morning. I've been driving him crazy asking about her. I desperately want to call her, text her, see her face; but she asked for space and I'm giving it to her. She'll come back when she's ready. I love her too much to mess this up, things are already so rocky, I can't risk making it any worse.

In my hands I squeezed the pink plush heart pillow from her bed, the one she always told me not to squish when I laid down. It was small and cheap but buying it for her made her so happy. Remembering her grinning like a fool in the middle of target made me smile, then it hurt. It's been so long since I've seen that smile. Fuck, I just want her to be happy, I want all of this to pass and things to get better. I want to start the new year with her, and call it our fresh start. I want her to come home.

Alex

I had been home for two weeks when Christmas Eve rolled around. My mom had sent me in her car to pick up Nick from the airport, the guys took a couple days off for the holiday and Nick would be here for three days. As I drove through traffic I had the deep fear settle in that Noah would accompany Nick. I knew it wasn't likely, seeing as we hadn't spoke since I left, but the thought still plagued me. When I denied Noah's request to come with me he understood what I meant when I asked for time and space, something I am very grateful for. He hadn't texted or called, not once, and as much as I wanted to reach out I knew it was best if I didn't.

I had a lot of explaining to do when I showed up on the front steps. There was a heavy amount of interrogation from my mom who required every little detail. I didn't tell her the truth about Washington, my job there, what I went through during it all. I can't hurt her like that.

I put the car in park after squeezing into a parallel spot next to the curb and pulled the key from the ignition before opening the door and standing up. I made my way around the car and leaned against the passenger door facing the airport doors to wait for my brother to appear. The chill air pinched at my face as I stood there, all this time I had missed the cold and now I was here, so found myself wanting the California sun.

A wave of tired travelers made their way through the sliding glass door and out onto the side walk. I scanned the crowd for the hair I know so well, there he was, at the back, per usual for him. His eyes caught mine and a goofy smile spread on his face, I pushed off the car and approached him as he sped up to get to me. He dropped his bag and bear hugged me, wrapping me in warmth. "I missed you so much!" He exclaimed as he lifted me off the ground.

"It's only been two weeks you dork" I joked as he set me down.

"It feels like forever! Noah won't stop talking about you, he's going stir crazy" I felt my jaw clench as Nick picked up his bag before standing up straight.

"He's a big boy, he'll be okay" I brushed it off as I turned to head to the car. Popping the truck I lifted it open allowing for Nick to drop his bag inside before closing it and heading to climb inside the car. The car doors shut at the same time with a dull thud, I cranked the car and pulled out onto the road.

"When are you coming back?" Nick asked as he peered out the window, taking in the scenery. "Noah's hoping you'll come back with me. He wants you home for the new year."

"I don't think I'm ready yet, I have a lot I need to work on." Silence stood between us for a few minutes before he spoke again.

"I know what you're trying to do" Nicks voice changed, somber now, no more funny business. "You're distancing yourself on purpose." He stated.

"I need the space, Nick." I countered, "it's been really difficult lately"

"That's why you have me, and Noah, and the rest of the guys. We're all here for you, especially Noah, he'd do anything for you" I felt my left leg start to bounce in the floorboard as I drove. I have to change the topic soon or I'll explode.

"Noah probably needs the space as well, time to relax, hang out with you guys, go and do enjoyable things." I suggested. "Anyway, what did you get me for Christmas?" I questioned him with my topic change.

"I left all your presents at home, they're waiting for you" Nick said with a smirk.

"Fuck you" I let out a small laugh. It was nice to see Nick again, only it made me miss California, and everyone else there. I miss hanging out with the guys on a night of drinking, before I dug myself too deep I pulled myself from my thoughts and changed the subject again. "Mom is really excited to see you"

Christmas morning came and went, and I now stood in the kitchen with our mom preparing dinner. Nick was propped on a barstool gushing to our parents about the previous tour and the album they're working on.

"I can't wait to hear it" mom said from beside me. "Have you heard any of it Alex?" I shook my head as I stared down at the cutting board before me.

"I almost brought a demo out for you guys to listen to, but Noah wasn't happy with it, he's still tweaking it." Nick explained before taking a sip of the beer he had between his hands. My hands shook at the mention of his name, I set the knife down to avoid disaster. I shouldn't be this much of a mess. This shouldn't affect me this much.

"So how does he treat her?" My dad spoke up. "I'm sure you wouldn't accept anything less than perfect?" The question was amid at Nick.

"He's great to her, I think they're perfect together. I wasn't too happy at the beginning of it, but Noah proved himself" Nick explained as I felt his eyes burning into me.

"What do you think, Alex?" My dad turned to me.

"I love him" I confessed as I got back to work with the knife. I swallowed the lump in my throat harshly after speaking.

"He should come out with you guys next time, I want to meet him" he announced hopefully.

"Maybe next year" I spoke the lie again.

"He sounds lovely dear" my mom spoke in a apologetic tone. Only she knew the whole truth. The whole painful truth.

Later in the evening when dinner was done and the kitchen cleaned I slipped outside, wrapped in a blanket, holding a freshly made jack and coke. I sunk into a deck chair by the burning fire pit. I stared into the jittering flame as the cold breeze bit at my exposed skin.

I heard the back door creak open, causing my head to snap up, spotting Nick as he stepped outside. "Hey" he said quietly as he approached.

"Hey" my voice was weak. Nick sat in the chair closet to me, his own drink in his hands.

"So," he started "I'm leaving tomorrow, you going with me?" I let out a deep breath as I turned over in my mind what I'm about to say.

"No"

"Do you have an idea of when you'll be back?" He raised an eyebrow. "Noah's gonna ask me as soon as I get home." He explained.

"I don't think I'm coming back" I felt my chest tighten as the words played back through my head after I spoke them.

"Alex-" he started.

"I can't Nick" I cut him off  "it's just too much" I explained.

"What's too much?" He asked leaning forward as he spoke. "Tell me, I want to understand."

"I'm a train wreck, Nick. Noah doesn't deserve that, he doesn't deserve half of what I've put him through. We never should have started anything to begin with, I knew it wouldn't end well."

"Alex, he loves you" Nick tried to argue.

"I love him too." I swallowed the lump in my throat again. "That's why I'm not going back. I want better for him." I glanced up at Nick to see the pain on his face. "He'll find someone else, it shouldn't be hard." I took a long sip from my glass before speaking again. "I need you to help him. Help him get out and be happy, I need you to be there for him" I pleaded.

"It's not going to be that easy," he shook his head.

"The first one he dates may not be the right one. But I'm sure he'll find her, she's somewhere in L.A., I'm sure she's beautiful with a great career" I explained.

"This is going to kill him, Alex" Nick looked down at the ground now.

"No it won't." I countered.

"What do you want me to tell him?" He looked up at me desperately.

"Tell him I want him to be happy. I want him to enjoy his life and his career." My chest ached terribly with my words. The thought of not being there to see his happiness, his success, any of it, killed me.

Nick sucked in a breath and held it before slowly exhaling. "What are you going to do?"

"I'm going to stay here, I have a job interview next week. I'm gonna get a job, then a car, then a place of my own." I explained.

"What about all your stuff?" He asked looking back to the flames in front of us. "Everything you have is in your room."

"Just pack it up, give it away" Nick dropped his chin to his chest with a sharp exhale.

"Alex-"

"It's fine. I need a fresh start anyways." Nick looked back up at me with a clenched jaw, I know what I'm saying is hurting him, but he has to know. "Don't tell him I love him."

Nick left the next day, but not without pleading me to change my mind. I just couldn't do it. California needs to be a memory now, and you can't go back to your memories. Nick hugged me tightly outside the airport before he made his trek inside and I was left with the numbness my final decision gave me. It was the right decision though. I know from experience that sometimes the right decisions hurt the worst.

Nick

I had this terrible sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach as Nicholas pulled the car in the driveway. I already told him everything, so he'd know what to expect, but now I had to do the hard part, tell Noah. Getting out of the car and grabbing my bag I was running the words through my head but I couldn't get them in the right order. Then I was at the door and out of time. I know he'll be waiting there, full of hope, wanting to see Alex in the flesh, only to be disappointed. Nicholas unlocked and pushed the door open. I followed behind him and dropped my bag in the entry way. I looked up scanning the house, Noah came into view as he stepped out from the kitchen.

"She's still there?" There it is, there's the disappointment. I only nodded my head. "Do you know when she's coming back." He asked trying to sound less disappointed now.

"She's not" I pushed the words out as I looked back at him. "She's not coming back." I stated. "She wants you to be happy, and to enjoy your life and career." I said what she told me. "She wants you to be happy." I repeated.

"No" he said in disbelief.

"I begged her to come home. I tried to change her mind. I did all I could. But she's not coming back." I explained. "I'm sorry" gutted, he looked completely gutted. "I'm so sorry" I stepped forward to pull him into a hug, he accepted and after a moment I felt the shoulder of my shirt dampen with tears. My heart was broken for both my friend and my sister. They were both in so much pain right now, a pain that only time can heal.