chapter five, full moon

You have always loved Jacob Black.

But Jacob Black has always loved you.

Since the moment he met you, he knew. You were it. The one. And his crush on you? It was never really a secret. Everyone knew.

Billy knew first-long before Jacob even figured it out himself. He saw it in the little things: the way Jake would bolt for the first aid kit whenever you got a papercut, how he gave you the last bite of his sandwich even when he was still starving, and how he made a fool of himself dancing and singing off-key just to hear your laugh.

Billy rooted for you both in his own quiet way. He was there through everything-the good and the heartbreak. He noticed the way Jake flopped onto his bed and kicked his feet in the air like a kid after seeing you, saw the corner of his mattress cluttered with balled-up tissues from the day you told him you were moving to the few months that passed after you were gone.

He was never afraid to share his feelings with his dad, but this-this part of him, the part that loved you-was different. It felt too raw, too big. Too real.

Jacob Black was brave. Braver than most. He adapted to his phasing and new lifestyle faster than anyone expected. He faced monsters-real ones-without hesitation.

But losing you? That was what scared him.

And when you left, when the two of you went from inseparable to one hundred fifty miles apart, it almost broke him. Any further and he was sure he would've snapped. It was like some part of him had been ripped out and he didn't know how to get it back.

Then you came.

The moment you walked down the hallway and looked at him for the first time in over a year, he felt everything crash over him like a tidal wave. His arms ached to you again. But when your eyes met-just for that moment-every system in his body misfired. Then lit up. Then misfired again.

And then he imprinted.

On you.

It wasn't supposed to be like that. He thought he was prepared, thought he understood what imprinting meant. He didn't expect it to be you. He didn't even think it could be you. But he didn't want it to be anyone else because no one else was you.

You had always been his everything. Now, you were his everything and nothing at the same time.

He needed you in ways he didn't understand. He needed to see you. Hear your laugh. Feel your presence. It was all-consuming. Steady. Terrifying.

So he didn't tell you.

He acted normal-or tried to. Even when everything inside him felt like it was shifting again, he thought keeping the truth from you was the right thing to do-at least for now. That keeping you away from the supernatural part of his life was protecting you. But maybe it was just protecting himself.

Things in Forks had been quiet lately, which was the only reason he had so much time to spend with you. But tonight? Patrol had picked up again and it seemed it would for the next couple days. Now, he's rushing through the trees, pounding the damp earth beneath him as he shifts back and heads towards Emily's.

You're still on his mind. Always.

The porch light is glowing softly when he reaches the house. He opens the door and steps inside, shaking the cold from his limbs.

"How was patrol?" Emily calls from the kitchen.

"Quiet. Easy," Jacob replies, a little breathless. He snatches a muffin from the counter and drops into a chair, stretching out his legs. "Need help?" he asks with a grin, even though he already knows the answer.

Emily gives him a look. "Not from you. Trying to avoid setting this place on fire tonight."

He laughs around a mouthful of muffin as the rest of the pack filters in-wet footprints, muffled voices, and the usual chaos.

Paul groans and throws himself on the couch. "Dude. If I have to hear your inner monologue about her one more time-"

"You could phase out, you know," Jacob mutters.

"I did. For like, five minutes. You were still thinking about her. Constantly." Paul throws an arm over his face. "I swear, it's like background noise now. Vampire, trees, squirrels, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, her. Her smile. Her laugh. Her socks."

"They were mismatched," Jacob mumbles.

Embry chuckles. "He's got it bad, bad."

Leah, who's been leaning against the doorframe with her arms crossed, raises an eyebrow. "Honestly? He's been more himself with her back than he's been in months."

That quiets the room for a beat.

"Dinner's ready!" Emily called out, cutting through the low murmur of post-patrol silence.

Instantly, the kitchen erupted into chaos-the shuffle of chairs, the scraping of plates, the bickering and teasing as the pack surged toward the table. Except Jacob. He stayed quiet, eyes down, mechanically loading his plate but barely tasting anything.

After dinner, everyone filtered out in different directions-Paul and Jared arguing over something dumb, Embry stealing another muffin on his way out, Quil making a joke about Sam's "dad voice" before disappearing into the trees. Jacob lingered, collecting plates and stacking them neatly. Emily gave him a small, grateful smile as she took them from his hands.

"Thanks, Jake. You've got good manners for a wolf," she teased gently, patting his back. "Go get some air."

He gave her a nod and slipped outside.

The porch was quiet, soaked in moonlight. Sam was already out there, leaning against the railing, arms folded across his chest, eyes cast up at the sky like he was waiting for something.

A full moon. Ironic.

He hesitated for a second before walking over. They weren't close-not like he was with Embry or Quil. For a long time, Jacob resented Sam. Thought he was a cult leader. Thought he stole his friends. But then Jacob phased and he started to understand. Started to see Sam in a different light. Maybe not a friend, but something like a quiet leader who carried more weight than he let anyone see.

Jake stood beside him without a word. The air was crisp, the breeze soft. Cicadas buzzed in the dark, their song a low, steady hum.

Sam spoke without looking at him. "You know, when I first phased I thought I was losing my mind."

Jacob didn't say anything, but he listened.

"I was the only one then. No one to talk to about it. No one to warn me. I thought I was broken," Sam continued, his voice low. "Eventually I got a handle on it. But then I imprinted. And that was harder."

Jake's brow furrowed, eyes flickering on him. "On Emily."

Sam nodded. "Yeah. On Emily."

He let the silence stretch.

"I was still with Leah," he said, voice heavier now. "And I loved her. I really did. But imprinting doesn't ask permission. It doesn't care about timing. Or history. Or who gets hurt."

Jacob looked away, jaw tight. He'd heard the story before-but hearing Sam admit it, here, in the quiet, made it more real somehow.

"I fought it. Every day. For a long time," Sam said. "Because how do you look someone in the eye-someone you hurt-and tell them it wasn't your choice? That your heart doesn't belong to you anymore?"

Jacob swallowed. "Do you regret it?"

Sam finally looked at him. "No. I love Emily with everything I have, but the pain it caused? I'll always carry that."

Jacob was quiet for a beat. Then he muttered, "I don't feel guilty."

Sam tilted his head, waiting.

"I'm just... scared," Jacob admitted, voice rough. "It's not just a crush anymore. It's like-she's in my blood now. Every second I'm not with her feels wrong. Like my skin doesn't fit. But I don't want her to feel like she doesn't have a choice. I want her to pick me. Not because of some supernatural magic, but because she wants to."

"That's the thing about imprinting," Sam said, thoughtful. "It doesn't erase your personality. It doesn't make you perfect. It just binds you. Makes your soul certain, even when your head is a mess."

Jacob let out a short breath. "My head's more than a mess."

Sam cracked a small smile. "Yeah. I know that feeling."

Suddenly, the screen door creaked behind them.

"Okay, seriously?" Paul's voice rang out. "Can you two stop brooding out here. Some of us are still getting hit with your feelings at full blast, and it's starting to mess with my appetite."

Jacob groaned. "You eavesdropping?"

"We're psychically linked, not eavesdroppers, genius," Paul shot back, walking out onto the porch. He looked at Jacob, crossing his arms. "She likes you. Seriously. It's kind of gross how cute it is."

Jacob looked down, shoulders tense. "You don't know that."

"Okay, Romeo. She texts you first. She looks at you like you're the sun. And you think we can't tell? You've been howling about her in your head for weeks. Every little thought you have about her since you phased. I swear it's like being trapped in a Nicholas Sparks movie."

Quil leaned out the door behind Paul, muffin in hand. "He's right dude. She's into you. She always has been."

Embry's voice drifted from inside. "We've been placing bets. I said you'd crack by next week. Paul's got Thursday."

Jacob buried his face in his hands, groaning. "You guys are the worst."

Sam laughed quietly and clapped him on the shoulder. "They're not wrong. I got Sunday."

Jacob didn't reply, but his heart beat a little louder in his chest.

He still wouldn't tell you. Not yet. But he was thinking about you. And the thought of you thinking about him too? That scared him more than anything else because it meant hope.

And hope, for Jacob Black, was the most dangerous thing of all.