Nightmare

You should've known the price of evilAnd it hurts to know that you belong here, yeahNo one to call, everybody to fearYour tragic fate is lookin' so clear, yeahOoh, it's your fuckin' nightmare-Avenged Sevenfold

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Somewhere over the Arctic/Camp Lehigh, New Jersey; 27 May, 1996

Over the day following Tessa's shock of waking up to The Winter Soldier alert and mission ready, the two had shared every meal, every second of training and had hours between them as they researched the coming mission that looked to be nothing but the gathering of intelligence from an ally. Actually, from one Ivan had called the first head of HYDRA.

Cut off one, two more grow in its place.

It was a spiel that truly got old when it was something one heard their whole life.

The mission itself was simple enough; they were to go to the former location of the birthplace of S.H.I.E.L.D. where, apparently, the first head of HYDRA was... living? Working? Housed? Tessa wasn't really sure. Was there a community bulletin board that other agents used to communicate with each other?

Any number of ridiculous ideas passed behind her eyes as she watched the darkness below the transport from the window beside her seat. Across from her sat The Winter Soldier, his eyes boring holes into her as they had been the entire flight. He hadn't said anything as yet, but Tessa was certain there was more going on in his brain than even he probably knew.

As they were hardly alone in the transport, it was probably a very good thing that he chose to hold his thoughts silent than breathe life into them. Tessa had only just now gotten at least her friend back, she wasn't about to let him go easily.

The idea of breaking James out of his mind was heavy on the blond's own thoughts, but she had that niggling fear that she needed him as The Winter Soldier for as much of the mission as she could possibly milk out of him. As much as she hated herself for it, Tessa had to leave him lost, and it made her hate herself more than ever before.

Her brow pinched roughly in the center, expression almost pained, and none of it was missed by her Soldier as he watched in the quiet of his space of the transport. Even when Tessa turned her seat to face the window more, he continued to watch close enough that he caught the smear of a tear against her cheek after she'd reached up to whisk it away with a finger.

It progressed the exact same way for the majority of the ride. Thankfully, Camp Lehigh was secluded enough that the transport was able to set down right atop an old, overgrown helipad. As the engines powered down, Tessa got up from her seat and made her way toward where her suit was secured in its footlocker. She was in the midst of pulling everything out when the pilot and copilot made their way out into the passenger compartment of the craft.

"Clear the base grounds," she stated simply as she tossed The Winter Soldier his mask. He caught it without really watching or knowing what was being tossed toward him. "Make sure we aren't interrupted."

The others nodded their compliance then headed out to do just as ordered. Thinking nothing of the fact, Tessa began stripping out of her clothes with her Soldier right there. A piece of him felt he should have looked away to give her privacy, but a much larger piece of him kept slate eyes riveted to her body as it was revealed to him.

Tessa didn't notice.

Meanwhile, his gaze raked down over her skin as more and more was left bare, and the sight of it stirred him in ways that he couldn't recall feeling before. Physically and emotionally, this woman meant something to him. She shifted things inside of him in ways he couldn't describe. She belonged to him and he belonged to her, heart and soul. She was to be protected like a precious goddess. 

It wasn't until Tessa was securing the last bit of her suit that she noticed she was being watched. Icy eyes studied his with the expectation that he would turn his attention away from her, but he never did. He met her eyes and held her gaze and was unapologetic about staring.

Finally, Tessa found her voice, but it was softer than it had been since he'd woken her that first morning. There was more behind it, more that reassured him that they had more between them than he was recalling right now.

"Go ahead and get your rifle," she offered as she brought her matching mask up to secure it around the lower half of her face.

The Winter Soldier nodded his head and rose from his seat, though his larger body lingered near hers for several seconds before he finally secured his mask in place and made his way back into the cargo space of the transport.

Tessa's heart was hammering against her ribs as he passed her, and she knew he could hear every pounding thrum of it. She could hear the same from him while he was watching her undress and then redress. Love was still alive and clawing its way out of both of them. Tessa had to truly get a death grip around her own heart in order to rein things in for the time being.

Fingers ran up through her silken tresses to adjust them to spill over the back of the mask properly. Once ready, she followed her Soldier into the cargo area just as he was lowering the ramp for them to exit.

The distinctive smell of the area made Tessa's nose cringe, and hers wasn't the only one. Even buried as deeply as he was, James still hated Jersey. Even reincarnation couldn't change that fact.

With The Winter Soldier armed and Tessa already seeking out the electrical impulses in the area, they both walked out into the balmy night of early summer. All around them were reminders of what the place used to be.

Unknown to The Winter Soldier, this was where his best friend from another life had come to learn the basics of soldiering before he received the serum that made him into Captain America. Tessa knew the records, but the place seemed smaller than she'd imagined it might have been. She had no idea where they were supposed to go, but the second her Soldier was in motion, she was following with total faith that he knew where they were needed.

A glance around was given when her partner paused at a padlocked munitions bunker. He produced a key that he must have been given by Ivan and had the doors parting seconds later. As they wandered inside, they eventually came to a set of stairs leading down into where said munitions would have been stored, had there ever been a single one that was housed there.

What was presented to them as the lights came up was the shell of an office with empty desks and scattered rolling chairs that had been left behind. Emblazoned across the far wall was the logo for S.H.I.E.L.D. The Winter Soldier wasted no time. He moved through the rooms and over to one of the walls of shelving and used his left hand to push one section of it back to reveal the hidden doors of an elevator that could only be accessed by a code.

Tessa watched as he moved over to key in the numbers required but was soon following as the doors parted so they could move inward. There were no buttons to press, but the doors shut and they began to descend.

"I think I remember this place, actually," Tessa said after a moment, her eyes glancing around at the inside of the car they were standing in. "I think my dad brought me here when I was little. I think you were here, too."

Icy eyes turned to find slate blues staring at her already, and she honestly didn't expect him to say anything, so when he did speak up it was somewhat of a surprise. "He used to bring me here with him, but only when you were there as well. At least, from what I can remember..."

"I don't remember what's at the bottom," she started, but a knot of dread began to coil like a snake within her gut. "But I do remember I didn't like it."

The car slowed and then began to stop, the doors parting to utter darkness ahead that felt positively cavernous. The Soldier took the first steps forward but heard his handler follow shortly after. After after twenty feet, the lights began to come up to reveal a space that hadn't been visited in some time, it seemed.

The walls that could be seen were lined with old, huge computers housing spooled databanks that hadn't been in use in a while. Things were already beginning to go into the digital age at an alarming rate, so much of this older technology was becoming entirely obsolete.

The Winter Soldier paused just ahead of a desk of monitors and scanned the still-dark expanses around them while Tessa made her way forward to the workstation. Of the three monitors, one of them flickered then spelled out across the screen in green: Initiate System?

Eyes glanced around as more lights came on to show the expanse of the room. It truly was remarkable just how much was housed down there. She'd never seen so much in one place before.

Trusting the Soldier at her back, Tessa typed in the affirmative and hit the enter key. As she straightened, they both watched as green pixels filtered into the black screen and began to form a rudimentary, pixilated face of a man in round glasses.

"Pierce, Tessa Marie," his accented voice began, reading who she was regardless of the mask she wore on her face. "Born 1970."

A large camera attached to the station swiveled toward where The Winter Soldier stood.

"Ah, Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, born 1918," he continued, something akin to mirth in his voice. "How wonderful to see you again, Sergeant Barnes."

Tessa's brow pinched and she cut her eyes toward her Soldier, both to see what he made of what was said and to assure that the mention of his real name hadn't dislodged the currently dominant personality of the man.

Something registered deep down in the gut of The Winter Soldier, something about the man's voice, the face he could see there on the screen. A piece of him was panicking like a wounded deer inside, and it was making the resolve of the soldier slip.

"Arnim Zola," Tessa spoke finally, her eyes on the screen. "I can remember visiting here when I was little, not too long after your body died."

"My body may have died," he began, bemused. "But my brain lives on, sweet girl."

Tessa wrinkled her nose within her mask at being called that, but she said nothing in response to it. Instead, she just stood there in wait for whatever reason they had been brought here.

"Your father has sent you here to assist me in getting a project off the ground," Zola finally said. "It will take a good many years yet, but I have a great plan for the future of HYDRA, one that your father believes you can assist in bringing to fruition with me."

"Yeah? I'm shocked my father would recommend me for anything," she said wryly and idly glanced around the place before looking back at Zola's face on the screen. "What is this great plan you have tucked away in all your reels of brain?"

"Right now, I call it Operation: Insight," he stated, a proud edge to his words. "But eventually it will become so much more. As the world is ushered into this amazing new digital age, it is ripe for infiltration. Knowledge is power, and there is potential to gain more digital knowledge than the world has ever fathomed.

"With that knowledge, I will create a way -- an algorithm -- to predict those who would be a hazard to our way of life," he continued. "And eventually a way to silence them all before they can ever speak out against HYDRA."

The idea of it was already not sitting well in Tessa's stomach. With a glance back over her shoulder to her Soldier, she was certain he wasn't pleased with what he was hearing, either.

"And what I am supposed to do?" Tessa asked. Clearly her father had sent her for some reason.

"You will infiltrate the young NEXUS hub in Oslo and assure that entry points are in place that can be used later," Zola continued. "It will be an easy in and out. Your father will send schematics, your briefing and time frame. Just know, this is most important."

"Why me?" she questioned almost indignantly, her brows raising as confusion seeped through her.

"Because, Fräulein," he started. "If you do not, I will assure the most precious person in your life suffers far greater than anything he's ever undergone before."

Tessa felt her blood turn to ice. She heard her Soldier shift behind her as he likely tossed her a glance that she didn't see.

"You are meant to take your father's place eventually," Zola stated. "This will cement whether or not you can be trusted to continue toward that end goal."

Tessa took a moment to process everything that was said then gave a slow, brief nod of her head. If it meant keeping James safe, she would do what she needed to do

"Delightful!" Zola purred, the excess lights around them beginning to turn out. "Your father will be in touch. Go now."

Zola didn't wait to shut off the lights, but he did open the elevator car doors so they had some light to follow back. Once both were on, they took that long ride up, and never once did either of them look away from the other's eyes.

Not a word was said as they turned out the lights of the old offices and made their way back upstairs and then out. The Winter Soldier paused long enough to lock the padlock back into place. Tessa stood rooted beside him, her brain seeking other electrical sources in the area, but it was quiet. There weren't any hidden cameras, no microphones, nothing transmitting except for their trackers.

"He meant me, didn't he?" came the muffled voice of her lover.

Tessa froze in place for several seconds, but she nodded a single time just a moment later. "Yes, he did."

"What am I to you?" his voice was soft even though he could hear where the pilot and copilot were currently patrolling on the other side of the camp.

"You are the love of my life," she turned her eyes toward him and would have offered a smile had she not been wearing the mask she hadn't needed in the first place.

That took him a little off guard. She could tell by way his eyes widened some, but the thought of it was not unappealing nor did it feel like news that should have been unfamiliar for him.

"That is why the sight of you stirred me the way it did," he said softly as he referred back to watching her change into her suit.

"Until you were woken," she started, her voice soft even though she reached up to remove her mask. "It had been two years since we've seen each other. We were punished severely for trying to escape together."

The Winter Soldier shifted his rifle into his right hand so that the left could come up to pull his mask off. Holding it and the rifle in his right hand, he reached up with the left and cradled his touch against her cheek. Without a word, he leaned in and pulled her to him so that his mouth could claim hers in a solid, possessive kiss that lasted far longer than it probably should have.

When he pulled back, his metal thumb brushed over her soft cheek and his eyes searched her own deeply.

"Then we try again," he stated. "Then again and again until we are free and safe together. No matter how long it takes, no matter how many tries until it happens. We're in this until the end of the line, beautiful."

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Siberian Facility, Russian Federation; 1 June, 1996

Tessa sat in the TOC, her mission briefing spread out over the war table before her. Really, there wasn't too much planning that needed to go into what was going to happen. With just a forged ID and the blueprints that Alexander Pierce had provided, Tessa should have been able to get in quickly and easily just on her own; however, she was also going to have backup with her, backup that would assure her success at shutting down the NEXUS and planting the virus that would hook HYDRA into every outlet into cyberspace out there.

This was almost too easy, to be honest. Something wasn't sitting right with her, something deep in her gut that made her think this was some sort of trap her father had spent two years devising in order to watch them fail spectacularly.

Nearby stood The Winter Soldier, his eyes watching her intently as she rubbed her small hands over her face with a frustrated sound. He knew he wasn't allowed to touch her unless they were training, but everything in him wanted to touch every piece of her. As ever, he stood stoic and quietly in wait for her to say something.

Tessa wouldn't make him wait long.

"So," she began, her hands shifting until she could point down at the blueprints in front of her. Maybe she was just overthinking this, but she was definitely going to run it by his tactical brain to assure that it made sense to him, too. "We just stroll right in the front door and present our credentials. Once we get to the hub, they should be expecting us and should believe this story that we are there to monitor a threat picked up by S.H.I.E.L.D. Once in the system, I blow everything with an EM pulse, you input the data stick and when the generators kick in it will automatically infect the mainframe and every line of output that is currently connected as well as any new lines that are added in the future."

Honey brows lifted softly, her eyes watching his face as he mulled over what she said. The Winter Soldier was highly trained with everything he might ever need in the field, including technology, but he didn't trust it at all. There were too many factors that could be used and gone wrong, just like they were planning right that second. When he said nothing, Tessa gave a small stretch of her neck then continued on with the plan.

"At that point, they should be asking us to leave in order to investigate what happened," she continued, her fingers twirling the odd little spike of technology that was a newer model than what she'd used to get all of the information from the Weapon X facility. "Grab the stick and exfiltrate to our transport three miles away."

She paused again and looked up toward him as if he might shed more light onto the mission she was laying out before him, but again he remained utterly silent and saw nothing wrong with the plan laid out in front of them.

"This feels too easy," she repeated, her head slumping into her palms as her elbows heavily found the top of the war table.

With a small sigh, he moved over to where she was standing and chanced a hand resting between her shoulder blades. It wasn't an uncommon gesture for The Winter Soldier. He had always guided her with a touch to her back in some manner.

"It's been a few years since you've been in the field," he stated in an almost flat voice, playing his part as he was supposed to do. "Once you get back out there, it will all fall into place. Trust in that. Your only failure ever has been the search for LeBeau, and that wasn't your mistake."

That was not something Tessa had told him about; he had been informed of that by Alexander Pierce himself who followed up the story about how he would deactivate him for good should something similar ever happen again -- a teaching moment her asshole of a father had called it.

Tessa would give him a teaching moment...

Setting her jaw, she rubbed a single hand over her face one last time before nodding her head and conceding to the words her lover spoke to her.

"Fine, yeah," she stated, her hand shifting until she could lay her chin into her palm, her eyes still lowered to study the very simple path they would have to take to get to the hub within the NEXUS building. "I guess we'll be ready in a couple of days. I'll get Ivan to help with the pallet, but I want you to assure the transport is one hundred percent ready to go and shielded from any excess EM that I might put off."

Sometimes it wasn't an exact science, especially when she reacted out of instinct, such as when she received her super soldier serum and her own blood reacted with the vita radiation needed to bond the chemicals to her on a cellular level.

"Not a problem," he stated without hesitation. "What else can I do to help?"

"I have no idea, Soldier," she stated, icy blue eyes finally lifting toward him as she straightened and looked almost directly up toward him since he was still standing at her side. "We're not taking a team this time. It would be too conspicuous, but we'll have backup nearby should we need to call them in for any reason. The local sleepers are willing to act if the need arises."

He gave a nod of his head then stepped back away from her.

"Let's get some food," he said softly, wanting to take her away from her stress without getting them both into trouble.

"You go ahead," she said, her brows knitting as she stared down at the table for a moment longer. "I'll be there in just a bit. Save my seat?"

She upturned those eyes toward him, and he would have wrested the moon from the sky right that second had she asked it of him. Instead, he gave a single nod of his head, forced his body to pivot and exited the room to head off toward the chow hall without her.

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Somewhere Over Sweden; 3 June, 1996

Tessa sat slumped down in the copilot seat of the transport while her Soldier piloted them toward Oslo. Her head was throbbing, and she had no idea why. The only issue they currently needed to worry about were electronic bugs on the carrier -- which were always there -- and the mission ahead of them. Perhaps it was the knowledge that if they failed, there would be dire consequences for them both.

They could not fail this mission.

For the hundredth time, Tessa leaned her head against the cool window of her side of the canopy and sighed out as her eyes were shut against the multitude of lights scattered across the control panel in front of both of them. Even with her eyes shut, she could feel his eyes on her.

"I'm fine," came the hundredth response to his unanswered question and obvious concern.

"Did you eat?" he asked as if he hadn't been right there at the table when she did that very thing. The look she cut toward him made him raise both shoulders defensively. "Alright, sorry. I'm just worried about you."

"I will be fine," she said and closed her eyes again, her hand coming up to rub at her eyelids then each temple. "It's just a headache."

"We don't get headaches," he said with a small smirk toward her. "Not without help."

"Okay," she said, straightening in her seat and turning toward him with attitude just wafting off of her in thick waves. "I'm scared shitless. I'm scared of being put back into the chair. I'm scared of you being put back into the chair or, worse, stasis. I never imagined in a million years that I could ever sympathize with Vasily Karpov."

Just saying it made her feel dirty.

"Just like you said, this is going to be an easy in and out and get away from the scene of the crime before anyone knows otherwise," her Soldier let his eyes soften as he looked over at her. He wanted to reach over and brush his fingers against her cheek, but he kept his hands firmly on the controls to battle that urge.

The only issue was that the headache was getting worse with every kilometer they closed between themselves and their destination. It didn't help that she was wearing a goddamn wig that felt like a vise around her head, but they had decided ahead of time that they certainly couldn't look like themselves when they waltzed right into the building. Security cameras had to be the least of her concern inside of a building oozing with technology. Her focus had to be on the hub itself and getting that virus planted.

"Tessa," he continued until she opened her eyes and looked over at him again. "I didn't train you to fold under pressure. You haven't worked your entire life to let something like this get under your skin. Your father is a shitheel of a man; don't let him under your skin and into your psyche. Show him that you are HYDRA's greatest weapon. You don't know how to be anything but that."

And that was a problem, wasn't it? She was HYDRA's weapon and only that. She knew that her Soldier didn't mean the words, that they were only for show, but it still drove home the point that he was absolutely correct. Alexander Pierce had gotten into his daughter's head and destroyed a piece of her that might never recover.

Tessa simply nodded her head, not letting James see how much his words stung even though she knew that wasn't what he really thought of her.

"We're almost there," he stated shortly after.

Tessa straightened in her seat and leaned forward to shut off the exterior lights so they could land with as much stealth as possible.

The landing zone was in the middle of an abandoned building with a courtyard in the center and was high enough that it would conceal the transport. Since the craft used VTOL -- vertical takeoff and landing -- neither would be a problem for them. It was early in the morning, and they had a four hour window to prepare themselves and get in a little rest before they could make their appointment at the hub.

With the flip of a switch, a holographic heads up display appeared of the landing zone so that James -- The Winter Soldier -- could precisely and perfectly settle them down in the very center of the hollow, square structure. As soon as the were on the ground, the craft was shut down entirely, the only lights remaining on being those very faint strips that lined the pathway from the cockpit to the cargo bay. Even those wouldn't remain on for long.

Tessa rose and moved back into the passenger area, immediately crawling onto one of the couches there and curling up to get her rest first in hopes of ending the headache before it got worse. She listened to the very faint movements of her Soldier as he moved around behind her then in the cargo area to get their things ready for when morning dawned.

When all was ready to go, he made his way back into the passenger area and sat down near Tessa. He leaned back and stretched his long legs out, crossing them at the ankle just as he folded his arms over his broad chest. There he would sit, dozing off and on but remaining vigilant of their surroundings while the most important person in his life rested.

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Posted: 21 August, 2021